Could This Be Love? (27 page)

Sijan took one last step so that only an inch of air separated their bodies. The heat from his searing liquid-silver gaze melted her to the spot. Warm heat spread low in her belly. The spicy scent of his cologne wrapped around her. Her own heartbeat pulsed, providing a building backbeat that twisted her higher and tighter. Her breath quivered, and when he finally touched her, with just the tip of his finger down along her jaw, she shuddered.

“So you
were
comparison shopping.” Sijan ran his finger along her bottom lip. His other hand hovered ever so close to her breast before moving up to trail along the pulse in her neck. “Then you’ll need to take my kiss for a test drive, too.” And he touched his lips to hers and the world disappeared.

He used his lips, firm and warm, with a sureness of purpose to pleasure. He teased and coaxed. He promised . . . something more. He pushed her robe off to touch her skin, caressing her shoulders and arms. The slightest touch up her rib cage had her breath tangling in her throat, as she waited, in panting needy breaths for his hand on her breast. But instead, the teasing lout moved both his hands to cup her jaw and turn up the heat to spontaneous combustion. He touched his tongue to hers, and all she could think about was the last time his tongue had caressed her body. Her knees gave out from under her. Only his firm body pressing her against the wall held her up. That must have been his aim . . . to sweep her off her feet, because that was the end of the test drive. He drew away, holding her until her legs were steady, and then stepped back, his eyes boring into hers.

“Let me know when you’re ready to buy.” Then he turned and left her room, closing the door firmly behind him.

What? Why would he do that to her?
Her head hit the wall behind her with a thump. Her knees buckled again, and she slid down the wall until she was sitting on her butt, legs extended out in front of her.
What kind of man gets a woman ready for blast-off, then walks away from the launch tower?

Chapter Twenty-six

T
he next day, Avery and Sijan sat in Dave’s Diner for the first time after being cooped up on the farm filming for over three weeks. Sijan got the paparazzi to leave early in the morning by driving down to the gate looking ready for travel. He let it slip there would be an interesting press conference in L.A. the next day at Majestic Studios. The paparazzi had cleared out in record time, trying to beat each other to the airport in Greensboro and onto the afternoon’s flight.

Avery expected Sijan would still be angry with her after last night’s Ferret-kissing experiment, but he seemed fine. Maybe even too fine. Although, he did seem to touch her every chance he got, as if he was teasing her like he had with last night’s kiss. Which was mean of him. Yet very hot. The question was, was he taunting her or trying to tempt her? Two very different things. One thing was clear. He was waiting for her to make the next move.

Renee stopped by with a coffee refill and an update from the Grapevine. “Avery, hon, word is your sister is on her way here along with an older couple.” Renee placed the coffee carafe on her tray and patted Avery’s shoulder. “Not that I want to butt my nose in here—do not roll your eyes at me, Sijan Cates—but with her bleaching her hair and the pregnancy test, I figure you might want a heads-up since you’ve been through so much lately. You want me to put the closed sign on the door, hon?”

“Thanks, Renee, but I’ve got to deal with Tansy sometime. It might as well be now.”

“Are you sure?” Sijan asked. When she nodded firmly, he said, “Okay. Renee, can we get one of your red velvet cupcakes? It’s just in case you need it, Avery, and if you don’t, I guarantee it’s one of the best cupcakes you’ll ever eat.”

“Aren’t you a sweet-talker, Sijan? One cupcake, coming right up.”

Avery moved restlessly in the booth. “I’ve been thinking about this weird relationship I have with cupcakes. I think when I was a little girl I connected cupcakes with love.”

Renee delivered the cupcake in record time, just as Tansy walked in the entrance directly in front of Avery. “We’re here for you, Avery,” Renee said.

Avery laughed. “Wasn’t it only a few weeks ago you ‘ran out’ of to-go boxes rather than let me make a quick exit to avoid this guy?” She tipped her head toward Sijan, who winked at her from across the table.

“Oh, well, we’re here for the entertainment too.” Renee grinned, gave her one last pat on her shoulder, and moved off to another booth.

Tansy, her face pale and eyes shadowed, stood ramrod stiff, holding a miniature Chihuahua in her arms. Michelle and Bob stood behind her. Michelle’s eyebrows were low over glaring, searching eyes. When she spotted Avery and Sijan, she pushed past Tansy and stalked across to the booth.

Ignoring Avery completely, even after not seeing her in two years, Michelle faced Sijan with her hands on her hips. “Well, Sijan Cates, what are you going to do about my pregnant daughter?”

Sijan’s gaze landed on Avery, and she lost her breath at what she read there. She’d expected anger, accusation, and cynicism, but her heart skipped a beat at the sexual heat, want, and acceptance in his gaze. “Sweetheart, did you forget to tell me again?”

“Not her, you idiot. Tansy.” Michelle reached back and yanked Tansy forward, where she stood looking ready to burst into tears. The Chihuahua had the same look. Avery couldn’t stand the pain in Tansy’s face, and she reached out a hand and patted her forearm.

Sijan looked at Michelle coldly. “Nothing. I never slept with Tansy.”

“You did. I know you did because I read it in
The Tattler
last week. Bob, do you have the papers?” Michelle reached her hand back behind her, and Bob smacked a few copies of last week’s tabloids in her hands. She fanned them out on the table for all to see. Each front page had a photo of Tansy and headlines like, M
OVIE
S
TAR
S
IJAN
C
ATES
AND
L
OCAL
B
EAUTY
P
REGNANT
! and
S
IJAN
C
ATES:
L
OVE
T
RIANGLE
? and sadly also S
IJAN
C
ATES
S
ISTER
S
WAP
.

The first thing that struck Avery was how protected they had been on Sijan’s farm. Five years ago, she would have been mainlining cupcakes and wheezing into paper bags, still unable to escape the tabloid reporters and paparazzi with these headlines. Instead, she’d spent the last few weeks safely cocooned in Sijan’s world and happily oblivious to the wild rumors.

Her second thought was how utterly miserable Tansy looked. The girl was in real pain. Avery scooted over on the bench seat and gently drew Tansy down next to her. “Tansy, no more lies. You need to explain what’s going on.”

Like an erupting fountain, Tansy started spewing both tears and details of the past few weeks. “Avery, I’m sorry, but after you kicked me out, I was scared and lonely. Someone on the hotel staff must have told one of the reporters about the pregnancy test kit. They started asking me questions, hounding me really, and I was already mad at you for leaving me, so I said I was pregnant with Sijan’s baby and that he abandoned me for my sister. They kept snapping pictures even when I said not to.”

“It’s okay, Tansy. Take a breath. It’s going to be okay. All right?” Avery used a napkin to dry the tears from Tansy’s face, soothingly tucking a strand of her hair off her face. “Tansy, are you okay?”

Tansy nodded, but her eyes dull with pain. “I’m s . . . sorry, Avery. I really am. I know I’ve been h . . . horrible, but p . . . please d . . . don’t make me leave you. You’re like a mother to me. Please, Avery.”

Avery couldn’t quite bring herself to hug Tansy. She honestly didn’t know if their relationship could be salvaged. Her gaze caught on the tiny quivering body of the Chihuahua puppy in Tansy’s arms. Those huge eyes bore into hers.
Help me
, they silently begged her.
Yeah, you and me both, buddy. But I’ve got to secure my own oxygen mask first.

Tansy sniffed loudly. “I’m sorry about Sijan too. I just wanted someone to love me, Av.”

“Yeah, well, I know that feeling.” Avery pulled back, ignoring the impulse to pat Tansy’s hands in comfort. Her gaze shot up to Michelle. “Trust me. I know.”

“Tansy, what are you saying?
I’m
your mother. I love you. Didn’t I just give you that dog for your birthday?” Michelle reached out and stroked Tansy’s hair.

“Tansy’s birthday? You gave her a dog for her birthday?” Avery couldn’t take her gaze off Michelle’s manicured hand as it ruffled softly through Tansy’s hair. Years of memories with Michelle and Bob flashed through her mind like an old home movie. There wasn’t a memory, not a single frame, when Michelle had ruffled her hand through Avery’s hair.

Michelle harrumphed. “Some mother. You forgot her birthday. I bought her a cake.”

“What?” Avery’s gaze moved from Michelle’s hand to her face. “You bought her a cake?”

“Of course I did. That’s what mothers do, Avery.”

Right then, it clicked. “It’s what mothers do. Every kid in all my classes growing up got cupcakes on their birthday. Their moms would bake or buy them for the whole class. You baked them for Tansy, Tracie, and Tommy. But not for me. Never for me.”

Bob cleared his throat from behind Michelle and said, “Well, Avery, that’s because we didn’t know your birthday.”

“Yes, you did. I wasn’t abandoned. My parents died in a car accident. You knew my birthday.”

“We gave you a home, Avery,” Michelle said.

“No. I used to think that. But no. You gave me a roof. And a place to sleep. And you didn’t abuse me. So, thank you for that.” Avery’s voice was hollow. “But now I realize you never gave me a home.”

Sijan reached across the table and gripped her hand. Avery gripped back at the lifeline until her knuckles were white.

“You never gave me love. I was five years old and had lost my parents. I was scared and starved for love. And you still couldn’t love me.”

It was silent in the diner, except for Tansy’s sobs. Pia, who had been sitting at the counter with Tynan, moved in and gathered up Tansy. “Hey, Tans, let’s go visit the ladies’ room.”

The bell over the other entrance to the diner interrupted the silence. Everyone turned to see Quinn and Henry Lee enter the diner. Once their gazes locked on Sijan and Avery, they walked over to their booth.

Avery saw Sijan shake his head at Quinn, but Quinn’s attempt to draw Henry Lee back missed as he had already zipped around Michelle and Bob with excited energy. Quinn shrugged his shoulders at Sijan.

“’Scuze me, Avery? I heard you got a hamster for ’doption. I want to be the dad.” He stood next to the booth and looked at her with serious brown eyes. “I wrote up my ’plication so you can see I’ll be the best dad a hamster can have. My daddy helped me with the spellin’ ’cause I’m not good at spellin’.”

“Hello again, Henry Lee.” Avery pulled herself together and smiled at the boy. “Sijan mentioned you might want the hamster for a pet.”

Quinn bent down to whisper a reminder. Henry Lee tilted his head a little to get every word, nodded, and pulled a folded piece of notebook paper out of his back pocket. He unfolded the paper carefully, holding it against his small chest as he smoothed the creases out with his hand before placing it on the table in front of her. “Quinn says I should show you this.”

Written in blue crayon at the top of the page were the words,
Why I would be a good hamster dad.

1.
I will feed him and give him clean water every day.

2.
I will spend time with him and play with him so he won’t be lonely.

3.
I promise I won’t feed him all my vegetables. Just some.

4.
I will love him ’cause babies need someone to love them and protect them.

Avery read the list with difficulty as gathering tears blurred the carefully formed letters, until she quickly blinked them away. How could a six-year-old child “get” love, but not her foster parents?

At her seeming hesitation, Henry Lee shuffled his feet and said, “Laney and Quinn teached me about naming pets. I was only four when Quinn let me name his dog. I’m six now.”

“What did you name Quinn’s dog?”

“Snot. But I know gooder now. I know booger and fartface aren’t nice names for a pet,” Henry Lee assured her, looking sincere. “And. . . and look. I been practicing this—” He cupped his hands and blew into them a few times, then stepped forward and placed his little hands on Avery’s cheeks, where they rested warm and soft. “See? I can make my hands warm before I pick up my hamster ’cause I think he’ll like it betterer.”

Avery’s throat constricted, choking off her voice. She couldn’t speak. Was this what drowning in quicksand felt like? She swallowed to ease the tightness.

“Some people don’t love hamsters. Mindy Tate in my class doesn’t even like them. She cries when she sees one. A hamster wants love just like a kid like me.” Henry Lee shrugged. “Some people just aren’t good at loving stuff.”

Avery couldn’t stop her eyes from whipping up to look at Michelle and Bob.

“You’re exactly right. Some people just aren’t good at loving stuff. Henry Lee, you sound like the perfect dad for the hamster.” Avery drew a pen out of her purse and wrote
Adopted
on the top of the hamster dad application.

Henry Lee couldn’t contain his excitement. He whooped and threw himself into Avery’s arms for a hug, his little arms wrapped tight around her neck. She pulled his body in, returning the hug, and he whispered, “Thanks, Avery. I’ll be the bestest hamster dad ever!” Then he pushed out of Avery’s arms and away to high-five Quinn.

Avery looked across the table at Sijan with wonder. “Sijan, you were right. It wasn’t me. It was never me. It was them all along. Pia used to tell me that too, but I think by that time I’d already experienced Hollywood and I couldn’t trust anyone. Especially not myself.”