Courtesan's Kiss (33 page)

She raised the fan that she’d brought along and waved it. He was not the only one disappointed and overwrought. “I agree with your suggestion. After tomorrow we will go our separate ways.”

She resumed her spot in the corner of the carriage, looking out the window, so lost in thought that she saw nothing outside the window but a blur of green.

D
AVID WATCHED
M
IA
through narrowed eyes. There were words to describe a woman who would do that to a man. Tease was the least of them.

If she had done that to prove how weak he was, then she had made her point quite adequately. He could take her again and again, and he knew as well as she did that they would lose count before they ever had enough of each other.

Lying in bed last night, as sleepless as he hoped she was, he had tried to imagine what their marriage would be like. Exciting for a while. But then he would have to turn his attention to the cotton mill, funding it, supervising the construction. She would feel neglected, and only Mia knew what she would do if she felt abandoned.

If she were carrying his child they would marry. He had no doubt of that, and they would make the best of it.
But he would never call it a love match. She was too young and he was too hardened. But whatever it was, he hoped it would see them through a lifetime. Otherwise they would end up mired in hatred and not above inflicting more pain on each other than either of them had ever experienced before. He’d had a glimpse of that shared pain today when he lost his temper and she had slapped him, and just now, a totally different kind of suffering. It was as close to hell as he ever wanted to be.

M
IA DID NOT OPEN
her eyes from her faux nap until she was sure they were passing through the town of Pennsford. More than one of the townsfolk waved in greeting. Mia waved back, even though they could not possibly recognize her as she had never been there before. David ignored the greetings.

The carriage moved on, the horses climbing steadily and slowly to Pennford. Well, it was a castle and would be set on the highest point. How she wished she was up in the driver’s box so she could see what was coming. Instead she folded her hands together to hide her nerves and inspected the grounds while she waited for the castle to come into view.

The grounds were as lush and green as all the other parts of England, but she noticed that this lawn was perfectly cut, the trees were well pruned, and the shrubbery showed not one dead or dried branch. There were few flowers in bloom and she wanted to ask David if there was
a garden somewhere, but held her tongue as the castle itself came into view.

It was huge, designed to impress, and it did. Parts of it looked very old. Hopefully the dungeons were no longer in use.

She had seen castles aplenty in Europe, but she had always been a welcome guest. Her uncertainty as to her welcome at Pennford added to the intimidating air that enveloped her as they drew closer.

The carriage drove through open gates and passed a charming gatehouse with apparently no guard in residence. She felt one of the grooms jump down and heard the sound of him pulling the gates closed behind them. Once on Pennford grounds, David banged on the roof and Romero slowed the carriage to a stop.

Janina let Romero lift her down from the coachman’s box. Without a word, David left the coach and began walking toward the castle while Janina took his place across from Mia.

“Oh, Mia.” Janina’s voice was filled with anxiety. “The castle is daunting, is it not? I did not think any place could be bigger than Penn House in London!”

There was yet another drive to negotiate but the castle dominated the landscape. The building still had the giant doors that reminded Mia of armor-clad men on destriers. This part of the castle was not old enough to have need of such doors. Some duke before Lynford Pennistan assumed the title had commissioned them to intimidate whoever came to call. It worked, Mia thought.

Nina reached over and pinched Mia’s cheek gently.
“Are you nervous? I will come with you. Have you thought about what you are going to say?”

She had not. She had been so caught up in her contest with David that her broken engagement seemed ancient history now. They stopped in front of the grand door and Mia felt her heart in her throat.

“Janina, please supervise the unpacking. I will see Elena myself and then come to you.”

Janina accepted the task without complaint. David waited at the carriage door and offered Janina his help stepping onto the drive.

When her maid had gone to the rear where the trunks were secured, he gave Mia his hand and helped her down from the coach. She took his arm. It was like taking hold of a piece of wood. Was that because she was working so hard to control herself, or because he was?

He took her to a smaller, almost invisible door to the right of the ceremonial doors. Before he lifted his hand to knock, the door swung open, and a very distinguished gentleman bowed. “Welcome home, my lord.” Then he saw her. “Welcome to Pennford, miss.”

“Mia, this is Winthrop. He keeps this pile of rocks from crumbling down around us. Winthrop, this is Miss Castellano, the duchess’s ward.”

Winthrop bowed formally to her. “The duchess is resting. She does not come downstairs these days, but asked that I show you up as soon as you arrive.”

“I will take her up, Winthrop.”

“Very good, my lord.” Winthrop made to step back, and Mia turned to hand her hat and cloak to the footman.

“And the duke, Winthrop. Where is he?” David asked.

“He is in his study. Shall I send a message that you have arrived?”

“Yes, and that I will meet with him at his convenience.”

David gave his things to the footman and offered Mia his arm. She took it, and closed her eyes for just a moment. As long as she did not think about his opinion of her, David’s touch, strong and confident, was wonderfully reassuring. At the same moment it occurred to her that if Elena sent her away, she might never see him again. The thought should please her; instead, her eyes filled with tears.

They moved toward the stairs. Mia cleared her throat and whispered, “I want to clean up before we go to see Elena.”

“Are you crying?” He sounded shocked.

“No, I am not.”

“Very well,” David said, and she knew he did not believe her. “Winthrop said the duchess wanted to see you as soon as you arrive.”

“He did not mean that literally, David.”

“You cannot put this off, Mia. The sooner you see the duchess and explain your broken engagement, the better you will feel.”

He annoyed her the most when he was right. Putting on as brave a face as she could, Mia walked toward what awaited her at Pennford, desperate for the next year to pass. How could her life have changed so completely in less than a week?

She had been terrified of smallpox. She should have been as terrified of the games she had played with her heart. No one need ever know about her so-brief affair with David. It was in everyone’s best interest to keep that secret. But she would know, and the knowledge caused a heartache from which she desperately wanted to escape.

So now she had to look back to her life, before David, and decide how to use her failed engagement as a way to convince Elena that an independent life would suit her best.

She and David climbed and walked and wound their way through a number of corridors, in silence. There were footmen stationed in various alcoves and at turning points, and though each one bowed to David, he barely nodded to them.

“I could have easily asked for directions and avoided this endless parade.”

“Listen to me.”

She could see the muscle in his jaw work and knew he was, if not nervous, very uncomfortable. Or was it worried?

“I said that I would see you safely to Pennford and I will not let you from my sight until you are with the duchess.”

“Are you afraid I would run away rather than face her?”

“I no longer have any interest in what you will do, but I will see my responsibility to its complete end.”

Before Mia could tell him exactly how it made her feel
to be called “a responsibility” yet again, they rounded a corner and stopped before a footman standing at a door.

The servant bowed from the neck and tapped lightly on the wood. A maid Mia did not recognize opened the door immediately and stepped back to let them in.

“Your Grace,” the footman announced, “Lord David and his guest have arrived.”

David came into the room but stopped before he was halfway to where the duchess was resting.

“I will visit with you later, Your Grace,” he said, releasing Mia’s arm without so much as a reassuring pat.

“Thank you for bringing her safely to me, David.” Elena nodded and David stepped out the door.

Elena struggled up from the chaise she had been lying on. She was huge, and Mia could not believe that the babe did not simply burst out of her with every move she made. Despite her size, Elena still managed to look very fragile.

“Mia,
cara
. I am so relieved to see you. So happy that you are with me.”

Mia nodded. Truly? Still unsure, Mia took Elena’s extended hands and kissed both of them with tears. “I am so sorry, Elena, so very sorry to have hurt you.”

“Hurt me?” Elena pulled her into an embrace against her side. “Oh, Mia, it is you I worry about. Only you. If anyone hurt me, it is William. He makes the words ‘grown man’ and ‘fool’ synonymous. If he could not figure out how to keep you happy then he deserved to lose you.”

Confusion overrode Mia’s anxiety. “But then why did you not write to me? I was sure you were furious with me.”

“Did you not receive the note I asked the duke to
write? My hands are swollen and I cannot hold a pen easily.” Elena held out her fingers. They looked awful, the skin stretched and her fingers stiff. Mia tried not to show the shock she felt.

“Sit down, please, Elena.” Mia guided her once-elegant guardian to her chaise where she and the maid helped the duchess seat herself comfortably.

“Should I change? Lord David insisted that we come to you right away. I’m hardly at my best.”

“You look lovely, if a trifle road-weary.” Elena patted the chair next to her chaise. “But humor me and sit a moment. I do have a few questions for you. I find the stories that have reached me both confusing and inadequate, and my imagination has been working much too hard with so little to do but wait.”

Mia nodded and settled in the chair closest to the chaise. Was what Elena had heard better or worse than the truth?

“Bring us some tea, Destin.”

The maid nodded and left the room. Elena waited until the door clicked shut.

“Now that we are alone, I will tell you what I have heard and you tell me the truth. It will help both of us decide what is to be done.”

Mia nodded. She already knew what needed to be done. Mia folded her hands and prayed that Elena would agree.

“Word reached me in a letter from Letty Harbison, written with great apology, that William and his friends
found you with the Duke of Hale, in a very compromising position.”

“No!” The Duke of Hale was a widower and even older than Meryon.

“Indeed, Letty did not think that sounded likely. But hers is not the only letter I received. I trust Letty more than the others. She is a good friend and will tell me the facts as she has heard them rather than fill her letter with pointless speculation. The Duke of Hale, Mia? That cannot be true.”

It took an unholy amount of time and embarrassing detail to explain the truth, up to and including the fact that it was not a crowd of William’s friends but only Lord David who had been with him when William had come upon her and Lord Arthur.

“Oh, dear. That must have made traveling with Lord David this last week uncomfortable for you.”

Mia nodded, her honesty evaporating. She was not going to explain the last week to Elena. It had nothing to do with her failed engagement. “I deserved the discomfort and more.”

“I blame myself as much as anyone.”

“No!” Mia raised her head so fast that Elena jerked back in surprise.

“Yes,” Elena insisted. “I wonder what would have happened if William were not my nephew and I had not given him the run of the house in Bloomsbury.”

It was true that Mia and William had met and become fast friends over those months, but what happened later was not Elena’s fault.

“He really did help me with my English,” Mia insisted, though she and William had spent more of their hours together finding ways to outwit her governess, who had been the most inadequate chaperone on this side of the Channel.

“I should never have permitted him to spend that much time with you before your come-out. It allowed an attachment to form before you had a chance to meet anyone else.”

“But he was my best friend then.”

“Precisely. But a best friend is not someone you marry.” Elena looked away for a moment. “Mia, why did you not talk to William about your worries? Why did you have to find such a public way to draw his attention?”

“I didn’t know until this past week if I was in love with him or not, much less if he was in love with me. Kissing Lord Arthur was a test.”