He slid onto a far chair and stared at me, his gaze focused on me. What the hell could have happened?
“Hey, where have you been?” Trillian asked him, staring at him a little too long for comfort. And then, without missing a beat, he turned his gaze to me, then back to Vanzir, and I saw understanding flash through his eyes.
Oh fucking hell.
He
knew
. Somehow, he’d picked up on it. But when? Just now? Or had he known for a while? My stomach began to churn as Vanzir shrugged.
“I was hanging out in the Demon Underground for a while. Hey, dude . . . Smoky . . . have you heard the rumors about your father?” Vanzir was struggling to keep his voice neutral, but I could sense the fear beneath it.
Smoky gave him a short nod. “Yes. Unfortunately.”
I broke in, trying to control
my
nerves. “We have further problems.” I outlined what had happened to Delilah and me, first in the portal, and then what I’d learned down at the bookstore.
“So we’ve got to figure out what to do about Chase, and . . . I think the person looking for me at the shop was the snow monkey that Trytian mentioned.”
My words died on my lips as I stared at the floor. The room was silent for a moment, and then before the testosterone could fly, I added, “I am thinking of selling the bookstore. I’m afraid for the people who come in. I’m afraid more innocent people will die because of the demons, or an irate dragon, or just because I’m a handy target for the Fae-haters.”
Morio shook his head. “You can’t let fear rule your life. If you do, you’ll lose more than you know. Everyone on this planet takes a chance the moment they wake up in the morning and get out of bed. You’ve seen Earth’s history—the wars in the Middle East, the world wars, the natural disasters . . . people dealt with them. Now, the biggest war is headed our way and you’re doing everything you can to stop it. Closing the Indigo Crescent isn’t going to prevent people from getting hurt.”
“He’s right,” Trillian said, his voice surprisingly soft. “You have never been one to run in fear. That’s one thing I’ve always loved about you. You said
the hell with it
and faced danger time and again. And now, my lovely wife, you need to stand up and face the facts of what’s going down.
All the facts.
”
It was both a question and a demand. And I knew right then that Trillian would bring it up if I didn’t. And Trillian didn’t mince words. He didn’t play fair, and he didn’t sidestep delicate issues.
I sucked in a deep breath. “Yeah. I’d better. Vanzir . . . will you please leave the room? In fact, you might want to go for a
long walk.
Roz, you, too. I’ve got something to talk over with my husbands.”
Vanzir jerked around. He stared at me, then bit his lip, nodded, and left without a word, Roz following behind him.
Smoky looked puzzled, Morio perplexed. I walked over and locked the door. As if that could stop Smoky from breaking through the wall if he wanted, but hey, it was something. And it might give Vanzir an extra moment to make a break for it.
I turned, scarcely able to breathe. My loves stared back at me. Trillian nodded, and I realized that he was on my side. How he found out—and just how much he knew—I had no idea. But he wasn’t going to go apeshit. Morio was still too wounded to throttle the demon. That left . . .
“I have something to tell you. You have to promise to remain calm. I need you to be calm for me. Before we left for the Northlands, something happened.” I could barely whisper. “There was no way to avoid it. You
have
to understand this . . .
you have to understand
. . . Morio—remember how bad it was? Smoky, you were off helping your mother. And Trillian wasn’t there. We didn’t have enough people in the tunnels when the ghosts attacked. It was bad . . . so bad . . .”
“Camille . . . what happened?” Smoky shifted, his hair coiling out to trail along my shoulder, but I pulled away, shaking my head.
“When Morio was hurt, Menolly and Chase were up top in the snow, trying to keep him alive till Sharah could get there.”
“I don’t even remember that,” Morio said. “Just the pain and the feeling that my life force was draining away.”
I pressed my hand to my stomach. “Yeah . . . I know. I
know
what that feels like. In the tunnels . . . Vanzir and I were left down there alone. We were fighting for our lives. I was throwing spells right and left. Vanzir was feeding so deeply from the ghosts that he was lost in the energy and couldn’t break free.”
Memories flashed through my mind, vivid, like a waking dream. It had been so surreal, and yet, all too real. “When we tried to get to the ladder, I couldn’t find my gloves—and the rungs were iron.”
Trillian nodded, and I could see he’d already forgiven me. He, of all three, would understand the most. He was my alpha, but he had the same Fae nature I did. Possessive? Yes. But to the point of stupidity? No.
Turning away, I walked over to the door and leaned against it, my head resting on the cool wood. Then I whirled around and pressed my back against it . . . eyeing the three men from whom I knew I could never keep secrets. They were my all. My everything. My loves.
I just hoped they’d feel the same about me after tonight.
Smoky started to stand, but I motioned for him to sit down.
“As I said, I threw some hefty energy bolts that night . . . the air was charged, drenched in energy. Vanzir was trying to feed on the ghosts, to keep them away from us. It was like being trapped in a horror movie with no one from the cavalry coming to save us. I got too close to Vanzir—he warned me not to, but I was trying to get his attention, to see if he knew where my gloves were.”
I paused, waiting, searching Smoky’s face. But Morio, I couldn’t look at Morio. How could I, when he’d been bleeding to death while I’d been down below, fucking a demon?
“What did he do?” Trillian asked, his voice even.
“His feelers were out, seeking energy, and right then we were attacked again. I cast another spell—a huge mother of an energy bolt. Vanzir latched onto me and began to feed.”
Smoky stood, his eyes draining to cold, flat gray.
“Stop! Please stop. Wait. Let me finish,” I begged him, still unable to leave the door. After a moment he sat back down, but his back was stiff, his expression unreadable.
“Vanzir didn’t
want
to feed on me. He
tried
to stop himself, but his nature overtook him. He was draining me. It was horrible, but even through the pain and the invasiveness, I could feel his anguish. There was only one way I knew how to stop him. One way to make him break off from my mind.”
I was crying now, both in fear and in sadness. So much had gone wrong. I held out my hands. “I gave myself to him. It stopped him from feeding on me.”
Smoky slowly stood again, then stepped forward, staring at me with a look so harsh that I cringed. Trillian noticed and tried to intervene, but Smoky’s hair thrashed, whipping him out of the way. Morio let out a cry.
“He
touched
you?” Every word punctuated by another step, Smoky reached my side. He grabbed my wrist and held it tight, shaking me as he drew me forward. His hair wrapped around my waist, lifting me up to face him at eye level. “I asked you if he touched you! Answer me!”
“Yes, he did. But he didn’t have any choice—” My teeth were chattering now. Smoky caught my gaze and then, after a horrible moment in which I was truly afraid he might lose control, he very quietly put me down and gently pushed me away from the door. “Don’t—don’t go after him! He doesn’t have his powers anymore! He can’t defend himself.”
Trillian and Smoky both turned to me. Morio was sitting forward as far as he could. I swallowed my fear.
“The Moon Mother came through me while he was . . . while we were . . . she stripped him of his powers and the soul binder. He might as well be mortal, except for his innate strength. She took away his ability to feed.”
Smoky began to laugh then, but it was a horrible laugh, one filled with retribution and glee. “And so the Moon would wreak her justice before I have my chance. But I will have my say. Vanzir will know why even the gods fear a dragon.” He turned and wrenched open the door so quickly that he tore it off its hinges. Tossing it aside, he made for the stairs with me running after him.
“Stop! Smoky! No.” I put all the force I could muster in my voice.
He turned at the landing. “Why? Did you enjoy him so much? Are you so hungry for him that you would take a fourth?”
I let out a little cry. “How
dare
you? How dare you make light of what was one of the worst nights of my life? He fed on my mind—he didn’t want to, but his nature pushed him over the edge. And just where the fucking hell were your ears when I was telling you about the attack? We were at
war
with a pack of hungry ghosts. They almost
killed
Morio—they would have killed both of us!”
Smoky let out a harsh cry. “I cannot stand that he touched you! That he violated not only your body but your mind!”
“He didn’t rape me! I offered myself to him—”
“To get him out of your mind. Both attacks were violations—and in no way do I believe that he couldn’t stop himself. He’s probably been sniffing after your skirts since the beginning.”
Smoky circled me, glaring.
“You’re
my
wife—Trillian’s wife. Morio’s wife. I share you with them because it is what it is. But I refuse to share you with anyone else. I won’t share you with some filthy stinking demon who worms his way into your magic and your mind. You are a priestess! He should have had
respect
for you. How can you defend him?”
Before I thought of what I was doing, I reached out to slap him across the face. A strand of his hair caught my wrist and held it taut. Smoky pulled me to him.
“You’re my wife. No one gets away with harming you.
No one.
Do you understand?” His voice was thick, and he reeked of musk and anger. “You belong to me. We are paired. Mated. I should carry you off to a dreyerie. I should keep you as a queen.”
I could feel the energy of his dragon self rising around him. The thought that he might actually go through with it this time—he might carry me off along with Trillian and Morio—terrified me. Reasoning with men was bad enough, with all the testosterone, but Smoky was, beneath the gorgeous exterior, all dragon. And a thousand times more stubborn.
“Smoky. I love you. Please, believe me, I love you. But Vanzir . . . he got the short end of the stick. I’m okay. He’s not. He has already been punished by my goddess. She did something far worse to him than kill him. She stripped him of his very nature.”
Smoky trembled, nuzzling my neck. He pressed his lips to mine, savagely kissing me. And then he slowly put me down. When he spoke again, his voice was barely contained. “Go. Give me time. I can’t think straight. If you stay here, I will find him and kill him. Once you are out of the way, I’ll go to my barrow for the night. I can’t look at you right now or all I want to do is hunt down the demon dog and destroy him.”
I stumbled away from him, still afraid but clinging to the ray of hope he offered. Trillian didn’t touch me as I walked by, but he whispered, “I’ll try to talk to him. Best if you clear out for an hour or so.”
“Morio—?”
“He’ll be okay. Just go, my sweet.” And as I hurried down the stairs, angry and afraid and in tears, Trillian turned to Smoky.
The minute I got downstairs, I hurried into the kitchen. “Did Vanzir get out of here?”
Delilah nodded, her eyes wide. Shade looked like he was ready to tackle something. I glanced at my sister, then her lover, shaking my head.
“I told them . . . about Vanzir . . .”
“I thought you might have,” Shade said. “I could feel his dragon rising from down here. In fact, I’m getting ready to leave for a little while. All it would take is one wrong word from me to set him off.”
I nodded. “That’s a good idea. I’m going to take a walk. I need to get out of here, but I don’t want to drive anywhere.” I hunted in the laundry room and pulled on my walking skirt—which Iris had washed—and one of Delilah’s turtlenecks. It was too tight, especially around the bust, and I stretched it all out of proportion, but I’d buy her a new one. Throwing my cape over my shoulders, I let Shade walk me to the door.
Delilah gave me a kiss on the head. “Everything will be okay. Vanzir took off. He took the Chevy.” We’d bought a couple of spare cars for the guys to use—not as pretty as ours, but serviceable.
“Good. But Smoky could trace him in a heartbeat. Okay, I’ll be back in an hour or so. If I get too cold, I’ll hang out at the studio.” We’d turned a large shed on the property into a studio for Shamas, Roz, and Vanzir to sleep in. Occasionally, I sent my husbands down there to get them out of my hair when I wanted a night to myself.
As Shade walked me out into the snowy afternoon, the light was beginning to fade. Late afternoon might as well be dusk—the shortest day of the year was barely a week away. As we wandered into the twilight, I prayed to the Moon Mother that things would calm down. I’d never fully trusted Vanzir, but I knew he hadn’t hurt me on purpose, and I wasn’t one to hold grudges when I knew it had truly been circumstance and not premeditation at play.
Shade cocked his head to one side. “Give him time. His ego’s been hurt.”
“Ego—” I started to protest, but he held up one hand.
“You must understand the nature of dragons. He wasn’t there to protect you. You were hurt. You didn’t tell him about it immediately. Those three things came to a damning head. He might still have wanted to kill Vanzir, but he wouldn’t have been so angry at you. He feels humiliated that he could not keep his family safe. Hell, I feel responsible for you, too, and you are not even my mate. You are my beloved’s sister. And if I feel this bad, can you imagine how much worse your husband feels?”