Authors: Silla Webb
Colton is getting tired, and aggravated, so Bill and Emily take Heidi Jo home so he can rest. He tells me to go home too, but I can’t leave him here alone. I press my forehead to his and cry silently for just a minute. I’ve tried to stay strong in front of him, and Heidi Jo. But Colton always brings out the vulnerable side of my heart. He kisses me gently on the cheek, and shushes my crying. I look up at him under tear soaked lashes, and giggle. I feel silly for crying to him, after all, he is the one suffering in pain right now.
“Darlin’, I think I told you once that you gotta stop that cryin’ shit with me. It crushes my heart, and I’m in enough damn pain.” He mumbles, gently rubbing the pad of his thumb across my cheek, wiping the tears away. He pulls me down to his side and I rest my head against his chest. He smoothes my hair down my back lazily. His eyes are getting heavier by the second, and it isn’t long before he is asleep. I listen to the steady rhythm of his heart beating against his chest, and that is the lullaby that pulls me into dream.
Colton
I startle in my sleep at the presence of someone strange in the room. I force my eyes open and when I see the blue scrubs, I remember that I’m in the hospital. Damn anesthesia has my head a mess, and everything is a fog. The nurse checks my blood pressure and pulse, makin’ notes on her notepad, then turns her attention to the IV bag. She disconnects the medicine bag from the line, and hangs a few fresh bags, reconnectin’ them to the IV.
“What are ya givin’ me in the IV?” I manage to straggle out. My damn throat feels stiff and scratchy from the ventilator they had me connected to durin’ surgery.
“Just a round of fluids and antibiotics.”
“No pain meds?”
“No pain meds, Mr. Weston. But I’m not exactly sure why you’re drawing out the tough guy act.
You had a terrible accident, and there is no sense in stressing your body so you can cope with the pain. So at least think about it. If your pain level gets too high, it could cause issues with your heart.”
“No pain meds. End of discussion. Make a note in my damn chart.” I’m more direct and aggressive than I’d usually be with a woman, but this topic ain’t up for debate. Damn drugs is what put my ass in this mess to begin with.
“Sure thing. If you need anything call out.” She smiles and pushes the small blood pressure cart from the room. The sound of the door closin’ wakes Carly Jo from her sleep. She raises up from the bed, stretchin’ her arms high behind her head, crackin’ her neck from side to side.
“Hey.” She whispers, behind a shaky voice.
“Hey, sweetheart. Did you sleep okay?”
“I was next to you, that’s all that matters. How are ya feelin’?”
“Like my damn arm was mauled off by a frickin’ grizzly bear. But I’m still kickin’ so it’s all good.”
“You scared me. I had no idea how bad the accident was, if the roof collapsed, or what. I was terrified that you were gone.” She whispers as tears begin to trickle down her soft cheek. I pull her close to me and kiss her deeply.
“Baby, I’m so sorry that you were scared. I’d called ya myself, if I could have. No matter how tough of a son of a bitch ya are, if ya get your arm ripped apart, your ass is gonna hit the ground.” I chuckle, tryin’ to ease her worry.
“Mack came by to check on ya. He had to let two of our men go. After the accident, they ran drug screenings on the entire night crew. Two of the guys had drugs present in their system, but Eric was frickin’ lit. Damn son of a bitch best be glad it wasn’t me who fired him, it’d been a lot worse than a damn pink slip, I’ll tell ya that.” She scowls as her face flushes red with heat.
“Eric was usin’? Who else?”
“Dave.”
Well shit.
“Damn it all to hell. I knew it.” I yell in frustration. Carly Jo raises up and looks at me behind puzzled eyes.
“Colton, don’t get yourself upset. You knew what? What are you talking about?”
“Baby, I’m sorry. I knew I should have done somethin’ weeks ago. But I wasn’t one hundred percent sure, and needed to check into things a little further before I did anything rash.” I try to explain, but I don’t even know where to begin.
“You’re talkin’ in circles. You knew what, exactly, Colton?” She climbs from the bed, glarin’ at me, waitin’ for answers. Shit.
“The last time I went into work the night shift, I suspected that Eric was high then.”
“What made you suspect that he was high?” Her tone is bitter.
“I’ve lived it. Felt the effect it has on ya too many damn times. He was jittery, couldn’t shut his damn mouth. By the time we came up from underground he was draggin’. I asked him if he was on anything, but he said he wasn’t. Just said he was tired ‘cause he hadn’t been sleepin’.”
“Colton, I’m trying really hard to be sympathetic to the fact that you are laid up in this hospital bed injured, but it’s really hard. Why the hell didn’t you order a drug screening then? All of this pain and suffering you are enduring could have been avoided. All of this worry that you put me and your family through, is literally your damn fault.”
Carly Jo is anything but sympathetic at the moment. Her face is boilin’ red, and she’s done crossed her arms over her chest. She is ragin’ mad like a pissed off hornet, and I’m the jackass that rattled the hornet nest.
“Baby, he told me he was clean. I believed him. I was just tryin’ to save you the stress of hirin’ another man.”
“Save me the stress? You have got to be the dumbest asshole on the planet. I can hire any damn redneck to run a piece of equipment. I can replace those damn miners, but I can’t replace you! If this accident would have been more severe, Heidi Jo could have lost her daddy, don’t you understand that?!”
“You’re over reactin’. Damn it, I know I screwed up. I should have come to ya then, and told ya what was up, but I didn’t. I thought I had it under control.” I bark at her, but she’s so pissed, she ain’t scared by the bite. She bites back.
“Did you even think that maybe, just maybe an accident could have been so tragic that not only could it have cost me the love of my life, but it could have cost me Daddy’s business. Damn it, Colton, you could have stripped everything from me. I trusted you. You’re my right hand man at the mines, and if I can’t trust you to make a call as simple as the one you obviously were too stupid to make, what can I trust you with?”
“I trusted him, Carly Jo, and it screwed me over. Big John caught me snortin’ pills at the mines once. He didn’t fire my ass, hell he didn’t even piss me. He told me to get clean before I screwed the hell up. There ain’t no changin’ my mistake. I put myself here. What else do you want me to say?” The tension between us is at a maximum level, and the madder I get, the more intense my damn arm throbs. Carly Jo drops her face to her hands, shakin’ her head from side to side.
“I’m so damn stupid. I knew I couldn’t trust you. But I still let you in. I knew you’d end up screwing something up, but I still caved, and exposed my heart. Damn, you’d think I’d done figured this all out by now.” She’s talkin’ in circles and I ain’t got a damn clue what she’s sayin’ or what she means. Before I have the chance to say a word, she starts up again. “I’m done. I can’t do this. It’s been nothing but a damn cat and mouse game with you since I came back to Kentucky. You’ll be answering to Mack from this point on. You are no longer the Superintendent. I’m not sure what position you’ll be given, and to be honest, that’s if you even have a position to come back to. You are just as much at fault for this incident as Dave or Eric. So now, I have MSHA breathing down my neck. I have enough damn stress laid at my feet, and I can’t deal with you and your bullshit any longer.”
She spits her venomous words at me, her expression is cold and heartless. I can’t believe what she’s sayin’. There ain’t no damn way I’m lettin’ my woman turn around and walk away from me after the fight I’ve put up to have her back in my arms.
“Damn it Carly Jo, you’re full of shit if you think I’m gonna let you walk out that door, just like that over this shit.” She bites the bottom of her lip and takes a deep breath, before taking a step towards me.
“I’m done. Don’t call me, don’t come to my house. Don’t even walk in my damn office at the mines. Get in touch with Mack to get your leave of absence paperwork.”
The sour words slide from her tongue and lash at me, cutting my wounds deeper. Releasing a deep breath, she turns on her heels and walks out of the hospital room, and out of my life, once again.
I slam the heavy wooden door behind me and stalk through the bland white halls in search of an elevator. The anger building in my gut is so fierce, I simply can’t control it. When I get to the lobby, I realize that it’s late at night.
Wait. How the hell did I get here? Shit. I flash back through the events of the day, and remember riding to the hospital with Bill. I was in such a rush this morning when he came over to tell me about the accident, I didn’t even have time grab a jacket, or my purse. So how the hell am I gonna get home?
I pull my cell phone from my back pocket and thumb through the contacts. Damn, I’m so pathetic. Aside from company contacts, I have Colton, his parent’s house phone number- sorta awkward to call and ask for a ride home, after breaking their son’s heart. Savannah, who by this hour is tucking the kids into bed, and Luke. Shit, shit, shit. I stare at the phone in my hand and press send. The phone rings twice, before my ear is filled with Luke’s deep husky tone.
“Carly? Are ya okay, honey?”
“Luke, hey. I’m okay. I’m stuck at the hospital with no way home. Can you come get me, please?”
“Be there in five.” And the phone goes dead. I make my way to the stiff chairs, and wait for Luke to pull up. As promised, it isn’t more than five minutes before he is stomping through the entrance of the hospital looking everywhere for me. I walk to him and when his eyes meet mine, it looks like years of worry have been erased from his face. He pulls me tight into his arms, before looking me over from head to toe.
“Luke, I’m okay, really. I just need a ride home.”
“Sorry, but for you to ring my phone this late at night, I knew something was wrong. Scared the shit outta me. What are you doin’ here, beauts?” He asks, draping his jacket around my shoulders, pulling me close to his side as he leads me out to his truck.
“Sorry, I’m not in the mood for talking tonight. It’s been a long day and I just wanna go home and go to bed.”
Luke doesn’t push. He just nods, then lifts me inside the cab of the truck. He hops inside, and pulls away from the hospital. The ride to my house is quiet, and for the first time today, my mind is closing down. The thoughts have quietened, and I feel like the tension is slowly rising from my shoulders. I push the emotion that has haunted me all day, away. I curl into his warm, Luke scented jacket, and fall away from the world.
When I wake up, Luke has me tangled up in his arms, carrying me inside my house. When my eyes meet his, his piercing blue gaze captures the depths of my heartache, and I immediately feel that electrifying pull to him. He carries me inside, and sets me on the couch. Squatting down in front of me, he tucks my hair behind my ear, then trails his finger down the side of my cheek. He kisses me gently on the cheek before whispering, “Sleep well, doll face.” He stands and walks towards the front door.
“Luke.” I pause, trying to find the strength to let him in. “Don’t go.” He turns around slowly, looking at me with that intense gaze that warms me all over.
“You sure?” He asks, because he knows that I’m as careful as he is to not let many people too close.
“Yeah, I’m sure.”
He sits down on the couch, and remains silent. I raise to my feet, and make my way to the kitchen for some Jack Daniels. I don’t drink, usually. But tonight, I need it.
I need a friend.
I need Luke.
Grabbing two shot glasses from the cabinet and a bottle of Jack, I pad back into the living room, and place the whiskey and glasses down on the coffee table. I don’t even look at Luke, but I can feel his eyes never leave my body.
I climb the stairs, and strip my clothes off, and grab a clean pair of pajama shorts and cami to pull on. Pulling my hair on top of my head in a sloppy ponytail, I bounce down the stairs and take a seat beside of Luke on the couch.
Grabbing the whiskey, I pour two shots full, and reach him a glass, before tossing mine back. The smooth, amber liquid crawls down my throat, and warms me all over. I pour myself another shot, and another, and what the hell, another. Luke set his shot glass down, then carefully removes my glass from my hands.
“Whoa, slow it down, honey.”
“Nope. This is how I’m coping tonight. You can join me, or you can leave. Your choice.” I barely recognize my own voice, I literally feel as if I left my heart back about twenty miles up the road. But that’s probably because…I did. I reach for the shot glass again, and Luke stops me, wrapping his hand around my wrist, slowly tracing circles over my pulse.
“Beauts, I’ll stay, only because I can tell that you need me tonight. But you gotta talk to me if you want me to stay. I won’t sit here and watch you drink yourself into oblivion unless I know what’s drove ya to drinkin’.” He keeps his strong hand firmly gripped around my wrist, and his eyes trained intensely on mine.
“I’m just hurting, is all. I let my guard down, and let him back in, when I knew I shouldn’t have.” I pinch my eyes shut to hide the tears.
“Weston?”
And with that one word, the tears break free. I have no control over them. I try to gain my breath, but it’s wedged between my lungs and my heart, being squeezed lifelessly, by the overwhelming emotion built up in my chest. Luke pulls me onto his lap, cradling me to his chest. I cry into Luke’s chest until I can’t cry anymore. When I try to get up, Luke tightens his grip around my waist.
“I need a drink. Hand me my whiskey.”
“Only if you’ll talk. You can’t keep it all bottled up forever, Carly.”
“I know. But it hurts so deep.”
Luke reaches for the whiskey, pouring me a shot, then grabbing one for him. I crawl from his lap, and sit beside of him on the couch, placing the bottle of Jack between my thighs. I toss the warm sour liquid down my throat, and begin to tell Luke about all of the pain my heart has endured.
I start from the beginning, when Colton broke my heart when I was just seventeen. I tell him about why I left Kentucky, the rape, and the seven years of personal hell I fought through to become the tenacious bitch I am today. I tell him about my struggles with coming home, and why I caged my heart up from Colton. I tell him how hard I fought to protect my heart, but I let my guard down, and let him in. I tell him about the accident that put Colton in the condition he is in. Injured, and heartbroken.
Luke listens intently, taking shot for shot along with me. He doesn’t interrupt my story, he only consoles me when the emotions get the best of me, and work their way out. When I finally finish drowning my sorrows to Luke, he tosses back a shot, and shakes his head. The more the Jack comforts me, the more I crave it.
“I’m sorry, doll face. When I first saw you in the diner that day, I knew there was somethin’ about you, but I just didn’t understand it. But every time I look into your eyes, I feel like I’m lookin’ into a mirror. I realize now, you’re just as broken as I am. But here is the difference, beauts. You’re pushin’ away the one man that you know loves you whole-heartedly. Don’t take tomorrow for granted, Carly. I know from experience that tomorrow may never come.”
Luke’s words cut me deep. I knew that there was something deep within Luke that gnawed at him, but I never could get him to open up about his pain. We’ve talked several times, but we always find ways to talk around the heartache.
“What happened? What’s your story Luke?”
Luke leans forward, bracing himself with his elbows on his knees and rest his chin on his fists.
“Beauts, you don’t wanna feel my heart ache. You have enough of your own to bare.” I can feel his anguish with every word. I scoot closer to him and wrap my arm around his thick bicep, resting my head on his shoulder.
“Luke, please.” I whisper. He leans back against the couch, sighing deeply, before pinching his eyes closed.
“Her name was Alyson. We met just after I moved to Lexington, and started with the fire department. She was workin’ and goin’ to school, always dreamed of becomin’ a nurse. Things got heavy fast. Before I knew it, we were gettin’ married, and expectin’ a baby. I can still remember countin’ his ten tiny toes, repeatedly. Sawyer looked just like his momma, with dark blonde hair and grey eyes. It was just surreal that love could bring somethin’ so perfect into my life. We didn’t always have the best, but as long as we were together, it didn’t matter if we had two dimes to rub together, we were happy.”
Luke pinches the bridge of his nose and balls his hands into fist, gripping them tightly to his thighs. He grabs the bottle of Jack, pulls the bottle to his lips, and pours the rest of the liquid down his throat in one swift gulp. He shakes his head, then scrubs his face roughly with his hands. When he looks at me, I am reduced to tears. His eyes speak for the raw emotion that he is feeling. He pulls me into his lap, and rest his head against my shoulder as he tells me the rest of his story.
“I had just got promoted to lieutenant over the engine company, and was stayin’ at the fire house more often than I was home. Alyson kept tellin’ me that one of the outlets kept sparkin’ when she would unplug the vacuum, so I told her just to leave it be, and I’d get to it when I could. She would get upset over it, always worried about safety with Sawyer and all. But I assured her it would be fine until I got around to replacin’ the outlet.
“I had to pull a double one night, so I bunked at the firehouse. We got a call for a structural fire at a residence, but I didn’t pay any mind to the address. As we were makin’ our way to the call, the dispatcher called over the radio and requested that our truck be pulled from the rescue and that another truck was en route. I called back to the dispatch, and asked why we were bein’ pulled from the rescue. She told me that the battalion chief ordered us back at the firehouse, and not to proceed to the rescue. I asked the engineer for the address that we were called too, and he told me. There was no turnin’ back.
“My family’s house was up in flames, and I wasn’t there to pull them to refuge. By the time I arrived at the house, the other crew was on scene, and the police were waitin’ there for me. The flames were too thick to save them.” Luke stifles back a tormented cry.
“I can still hear them, their screams, beggin’ to be saved. I was there Carly, and I couldn’t save them. I would’ve died there, right along with them, but they wouldn’t let me go to them. I may not have physically died that night, but my soul did.” He keeps his face pressed in the crook of my neck, silently releasing his tortured agony. I just let him cry, because I don’t think he has ever had this kind of emotional release since experiencing such a tragic loss.
Luke looks up into my eyes, and my heart breaks a little more for him, now that I understand why he is so broken. He wraps his large, warm hands around may face, and pulls me closer to him, looking deep into my soul. “Angel, I knew when I looked into your eyes, I saw that your soul reflected mine. I always thought you were so beautiful, but now, you’re just beautifully broken. I hate seeing you hurt, but damn if I don’t want to heal your heart, while you heal mine,” he breaths against cheek, before capturing my lips between his.
My brain is in an alcohol induced fog, impaired by the overload of heartache that we have both shared here tonight. But Luke’s touch courses through my body, heating me from head to toe. I kiss him passionately, and let go of all of the thoughts that are cluttering my mind. My only focus is Luke, and this tantalizing kiss he has pulled me in. Luke trails warm kisses down my neck and across my shoulder.
He slides his finger through the strap of the cami, sliding it down my arm, exposing my breast. I arch my back, pressing my breast forward as he feathers delicate kisses across my nipple. I run my fingers through his hair, tugging his brown locks, as he flicks his tongue around my nipple. My
sex clinches at the sensation of his velvety tongue against my flesh. Luke wraps his arm tightly around my waist, lifting me as he stands, carrying me up the stairs. Our gaze never breaks, as he carries me to my bed.
He slides my body down his slowly, and I can feel his hardness pressing against me. He slowly undresses me, sure to keep his intent stare with my eyes. Once I’m naked and exposed in front of him, I trail my fingers up his chest softly, and he moans at the contact. He strips from his clothes, and tangles me in his arms, his lips crashing into mine instinctively. He backs me up against the bed, laying me back gently, before baring his weight on top of me. With his body pressed against mine, I feel protected, and safe.
Our tongues dance delicately together, before he pulls away from my lips, trailing sweet kisses down my chest and across my navel. He rubs his hand against my thigh, willing me to part my legs. He caresses my thigh, slowly working his way up to my sex. His fingers softly caress my swollen heat, trailing the pads of his fingertips around my clit, teasing me with light thrusts. A slight whimper escapes my lips, and I just want to taste him more. He wraps his arm around my waist, rolling so that he’s under me. He pulls my lips to his, and slowly licks along the bottom of my lip, with the tip of his tongue.
“I want to watch you, love me. My beautifully broken beauts.” He breathes against my lips. I could melt at his words. He is so sensual, and affectionate with each touch. I kiss across his pecks, and down the center of his abs, gripping his cock and stroking him softly. His eyes roll back, and a guttural moan escapes his lips.
I continue to stroke his cock, wrapping my lips around him, sucking from hilt to tip. A low rumble rattles deep in his chest, the harder I suck. I lick the length of his cock one last time before guiding it between my wet, creamy thighs, thrusting myself onto him.