Coveted: An Alpha Male Romance (5 page)

Present day...

Chapter Five

Yanna E. Hill

“Hello?”

“Hey, Madea. How are you?”

“Hey baby. I’m still here, so no complaints. I’m blessed.”

That was my Madea, always thinking positive and praising God, despite it all.

Before Tyler Perry there was Shirley Jackson, but all sixteen of her grandchildren called her Madea.

“How are you doing, baby?”

“I’m fine. Roc and I are about to go out of town. We’re sitting in the airport.”

I hated to fly;
hated
it. But anytime that Roc wanted to take me to some lavish place that required a flight, I sucked it up. So far, we had been to many countries and had torn up every major city.

After the shooting, Roc insisted that I leave town. He wanted to ensure my safety while he and his crew investigated who was doing this. He was so worried about protecting me that he would not let me out of his sight, so he was coming too. We figured that we might as well make it enjoyable since we were being forced to leave town, so we were on our way to Punta Cana for a week of relaxation and no guns or flying bullets. Of course, Gabe was with us, and since he was joining us, so did Tanisha.

Gabe and Tanisha had been messing around for about six months. He’d spent the last five years pursuing her. He’d met her when she accompanied me to a club that Roc had invited me to soon after we started dating. Once she caught her boyfriend cheating a few months ago, Tanisha finally paid Gabe some attention. However, getting cheated on by the man she had been with for seven years, and was looking forward to marrying, had her emotionally fucked up and unavailable for anything, except a casual encounter here and there.

With each flight I took, I made it a point to call Madea so that she could pray for us. Of course, I knew how to pray, but I had always felt like my grandmother had Jesus’ personal phone number. In my mind, her prayers got to him faster. So, as soon as I told her, “We’ll be boarding soon,” she started to pray.

I closed my eyes and held Roc’s hand, who was sitting next to me smelling like heaven with a look to kill in his face. The shooting had him so pissed off that it was written all over his face. He and Gabe had been making secretive phone calls all night while Tanisha and I packed.

“Amen,” I said, as my grandmother finished praying.

“You have fun, baby, okay?”

“I plan to. How is everything? What are the doctors saying?”

Madea had cancer. Four years ago, it showed up in her lungs. Pissed me off because she’d never smoked a day in her life. She’d fought it ever since, but she was in her late seventies. The chemo treatments left her weak and tired. At most times, she was too weak and out of breath to walk. Just recently, another tumor was found in her stomach.

“You don’t want to talk about that right now. You’re about to go on vacation.”

“Madea, I need to know. I don’t know what kind of connection I’ll h–”

“Hush, chil’. I’m fine. I’m still alive. That’s all you need to know.”

I closed my eyes and bit my tongue. She was lying. The last time that I saw her, she could barely sit up straight.

“Now,” she started, in an effort to change the subject. “What fabulous place is that man taking you now?”

I fought the urge to argue with her. “Punta Cana,” I answered, solemnly.

“Oooo,” she squealed. “That sounds so nice.”

“I’ll take you when you get all better,” I told her.

“I can’t wait. Roc is always so good to you. When are y’all getting married?”

I looked at him. He didn’t know what Madea and I were talking about, but he still smiled, gently grabbed that back of my neck and kissed my lips quickly.

I sighed slightly. “Eventually,” I told Madea.

****

Once on the private jet, Roc tucked us away in one of the private cabins. Since the shooting, he’d been so consumed with finding out what was going on, that we hadn’t made love. I was okay with that. I knew that his mind was somewhere else. But after a few shots of whiskey, his eyes began to smile lustfully at me as I lay across the bed.

“What are you staring at, Daddy?” I flirted.

He bit his lip. “You with all those curves and me with no brakes.”

Instantly, I got excited. It had only been one night since he touched me, but we still had about a week to make up for.

He left the recliner and came to me. We had been together for five years, but every time I laid eyes on him was like doing it for the first time. His body was poetic. He was so stalky that I looked forward to disappearing into his arms every time he was near me. He lifted his shirt as he knelt in the bed and revealed the many scripts that were inked on his olive skin. There were so many that his back, arms and chest looked like one big tattoo. There was even one of a curvy, dark woman on his right forearm with the one simple word that he used to describe me, “Baby.” There was also my name on his chest. It was scripted under the “Love Is” comic characters. It read: Love Is… Yanna E. Hill. Those were the only loving tattoos on his body. The rest of them were treacherous markings of skulls, guns, and scripts in different languages of street slang.

I kissed that Love Is tattoo as he climbed between my legs and took me. I swear, no matter what was going on around us, having this man on top of me felt like happily ever after. There was nothing better than having him near me, but my world felt complete with him on top of me.

“I love you, Daddy,” I whispered as he kissed my neck, and, I swear, I felt his chest heave. Every time I said it, every time I called him Daddy, it did something to him and I felt it. His length hardened between my thighs as he kissed me aggressively and pushed my sundress up around my waist.

Though we were kissing, he smiled as he felt my bare wetness with his fingertips.

“No panties,” he literally purred. “Good girl.”

And every time he said
that
, it did something to me and I was sure he felt it. My body began to overflow all over his hand as I rubbed my pussy against it.

“I love you too, by the way.”

I smiled as my breathing began to get heavy. “Oh, by the way, huh?”

And his smile was so damn sexy as he told me, “Yea, by the way.

God, this man was everything. “Fuck me,” I begged.

“Take it. Put it in, Baby.”

And as soon as I grabbed it, my mind became boggled with confusion. I wasn’t on the dean’s list. I for damn sure didn’t graduate summa cum laude. Yet, I was a smart woman. I had many degrees and could think quickly on my feet…. until his dick was in my hand. Suddenly, my decision–making skills were out the window. I couldn’t figure out whether I wanted to put that beautiful, big piece of steel into my mouth or my pussy.

They were both fighting for his feel, for his touch, for the taste of his cum, but I opted to allow him to keep kissing me as I guided him inside of me.

Rocco de Michele

Fuck
.

I had to stop kissing Baby so that I could bite my lip and fight the urge to cum inside of her prematurely. I had been so wrapped up in figuring out which of these punk motherfuckers were trying to kill me that I hadn’t gotten my daily dose of her. And boy was I paying for it.

“Shit,” forced its way out of my mouth as I swam inside of her tight cave.

“Mmmm, yes, Daddy. I missed this dick.”

Fuck
!

I wanted to put my hand over her mouth to stop her sounds that were encouraging my babies to come out and swim inside of her but, better than how her pussy felt, her sweet noises sounded so fucking good in my ear.

But I had to turn her over. Baby came good and fast when she was riding me, and I needed her to get hers before mine came out against my will.

Now on top of me, Baby pulled her sundress completely over her head. The sun coming in from the windows was like a spotlight on her body.

When we first met, she used to shy away from the light. Now, she basked in it. Once ashamed of them, she now owned her curves, allowing them to warm in my hands.

She rested on her purple–painted toes and began to bounce up and down, slowly with her hands resting on her knees and her eyes burning into mine as her curls fell into them. She grinded her hips into my cock after each stroke. I grabbed her waist and began to meet each of her strokes, enticing her orgasm to come down and meet mine.

“Shit!” she squealed loud enough for Gabe, Tanisha, and hell, even the flight attendant to hear. But if I knew my right hand like I know I did, Gabe was in the other suite giving Tanisha the same orgasms that I was trying to give Baby. And I paid the flight attendant well enough for her to deal with the noise.

“Cum on, Baby,” I encouraged her as I smacked that big, beautiful ass.

“Shit, Roc! Yes! I’m cumming!”

“Good! Come on. Cum all over Daddy’s cock.”

She loved how I talked to her. She told me as much. Said that my control was an aphrodisiac to her.

“Yeeeees!”

She was literally growling as I felt her juice sliding down my cock. “Cum again,” I demanded, not slowing down my strokes. But her body became weak in my hands and she fell on my chest.

“Shit,” she heaved, as I continued to thrust in and out of her now sloppy, wet pussy. “Please, baby. I can’t–“

I smacked her ass, only to fuck with her orgasm even more. “What did you call me?”

“Fuck!” she squealed. “I can’t take anymore.”

“I’m not ready to release you yet. Cum again, Baby.”

****

“What did Madea say on the phone earlier that made your mood change?”

There was about an hour and half left in our flight. Baby and I were lying on top of the white sheets. I was running my fingers through her curls as I attempted to catch my breath.

I had finally allowed myself to cum and it felt like release had taken my energy with it.

“I figured you noticed that.”

“You know I see everything.”

I got alarmed when she sighed heavily. “She asked me when we were getting married.”

Just then, my heart sank. “And that is when I heard you say ‘eventually’?”

She blew breath as if her heart was sinking as well. “Yea.”

Ignoring the tension that I felt coming from her, I asked, “How is she doing?”

Again, she sighed, this time it came from deeper within. “She says she’s fine, but you know her–”

“She always acts like everything is okay.”

“Right.”

At that moment, fate came in, saved our mood and snatched the tension from the air. Our song began to play on the iPod dock and we simultaneously began to nod our heads to his words. I even began to sing to her, to bring back the loving feeling that her orgasm had given her before conversation brought in the tension. “
Love is a part of our story, hate is a part of our story. Making up, breaking up, it's all in here
.” And she spooned with me, held me tighter, and sang along with me, “
If you just turn it up, it's our history to a beat. And, girl, here is our story.
”

Then we both let out faint, exhausted giggles because those lyrics were so true.

Making up, breaking up; there was so much that was a part of our story, and I knew, while holding her in my arms and the flight attendant announced that we were forty miles from the Dominican, that our story had just begun.

2006

Chapter 6

Yanna E. Hill

"Oh my god, Tanisha! I can't believe it! I'm pregnant!"

I practically ran the last five feet to my car. I was
so
excited!

I was twenty–one and it was the end of my junior year in undergrad. Most twenty–one–year–old women were trying to figure out how to get as drunk as possible during the oncoming summer, but not me. I had been with Alex Jenkins, my boyfriend, for the past two years. We lived near one another in small apartments right off of the campus of the University of Illinois. For the past two weeks, I had been waiting for my period to come and it never did.

Tanisha, who I met freshman year in an English class, had gone to a local clinic with me after class. Now, I was standing in the parking lot shaking like a leaf with excitement as she sat in my old, white, rusted Cavalier. It was a gift from my mother after she upgraded to an Expedition. Tanisha had stayed in the car as I waited in the clinic on the South Side of Chicago, with, what seemed like, a hundred other girls who weren't as excited about being pregnant as I was.

But I was indeed excited! I loved Alex so much. After years of being insecure about my weight, my height, my excessively curly, unmanageable mane, I had finally met the man of my dreams in a math class freshman year. He was average, tall, dark and somewhat handsome pre–med major that I felt lucky as hell to have. It seemed as if, besides my studies, I could think of nothing else but him. His love for me was the same. I loved him so much because he adored me, and he showed it every chance he got. So to be pregnant with his child was a dream come true. All we needed now were our degrees and the wedding bells.

“Girl, you’re standing there smiling like this is the best thing in the world. You forget that your mother is going to kill you. Miss Tracy Jackson is not going to be excited about her only daughter having a baby out of wedlock before she finishes college.”

I rolled my eyes in the back of my head as I stood in front of the driver side door with my arms folded. Tanisha, being the realest person that I'd ever met, did not sugarcoat her words at all. She just looked me upside my head as she snacked from a bag of Flamin' Hot Cheetos.

As I continued to stand there in irritated silence, she smacked her lips, saying, “You know I'm right. I'm just saying. Congratulations and all, but your mother is going to kill you.”

“Whatever, heffa. Scoot over. I have to go tell Alex.”

****

Obviously, Alex was just as excited as I was when I told him the good news.

Alex was sitting at his kitchen table, eating a bowl of spaghetti that I had made him for dinner. The moment that the words fell from my mouth, his arms flew open to embrace me. “Oh my God, baby! That’s great!”

I fell into his arms with the happiest feeling overcoming me. I also felt a weird feeling in my belly. I knew that it was way too early to feel my baby. I knew that the feeling in my stomach was butterflies, but it gave me so much joy to know that soon that feeling would be replaced with something real; something that belonged to both me and Alex.

I thought life could get no better.

I sighed as I released Alex so that he could get back to his meal. Money was tight for college students, especially a pre–med major. My mother had given me money for groceries, so this spaghetti was a luxury. The Texas Toast was like heaven.

Alex noticed the sudden solemn aura over me. “What’s wrong?”

“I have to tell Mama.” Just the thought gave me anxiety as I sat back in my seat. I pushed away my plate. Suddenly, I wasn’t hungry anymore.

“She knows how much we love each other.”

“But I have to tell her that I’ll be quitting school.”

That was always the plan. If I got pregnant, Alex and I had decided that it would be best that I become a stay–at–home mom. The price of daycare was too much to add to tuition costs. I would go back to school after Alex was finished with his Critical Care fellowship. That wouldn’t be for a few years, but I felt it was worth losing my love of becoming a teacher if I was gaining a family, in the process.

“Just talk to her, babe.” Alex quickly squeezed my thigh and got back to his meal. “She’ll understand.”

Just watching Alex gave me the courage that I needed to stand up to Mama. I was willing to fight that round for him and my baby.

It was always hard to get Mama to understand my love for Alex. In my twenty–one years, I think I saw her go on one date, and I never saw him again. Needless to say, my mama was never married. She developed this emotionless, thick–skin that I never wanted to inherit. She acted as if she never needed a man for anything, and she never understood why any woman would let a man rule her world.

Alex didn’t rule mine, but he definitely played a major part in it. His love had given me a confidence that my mother had never bothered to teach me. He meant more to me than just someone to lay up with. What he had done for me spiritually and emotionally was worth me putting my dreams on hold for. I owed him that.

So, Mama would just have to understand.

Chapter 7

Yanna E. Hill

Four months later, I experienced the worst day of my life.

“Alex! Alex, get up!”

At six months pregnant, I expected to feel some cramping, but this; this was different.

“Arrgh!” I yelled out as another pain shot down my back. It felt like death!

Alex jolted out of his sleep. He had been on rounds in the hospital all night. He had just come home and climbed into bed at five that morning. He was sluggish, but as another pain shot down my spine, he was wide awake.

“Arrrgh! Shit! Oh my Goooood!”

“Is the baby coming?” The same worry filled his eyes that was in my heart. Then he slowly said, “It’s too early.”

Tears came to my eyes as I whimpered, “I know.”

Immediately, he hopped over me, stood on the side of the bed and began to help me up.

But I refused. “It hurts,” I moaned, in pain.

“Come on, baby. We
have
to go.”

He started to throw on whatever pants, shirts and shoes that he saw. Then he threw the covers back, grabbed my shoes, and started to put them on my feet. I look around frantically, hoping that something was lying around that I could throw on over the panties and bra that I was wearing.

“Here. Throw this on,” Alex advised, handing me a long sweater dress from my side of the closet. We now lived together in his apartment in order to save money for the baby and our wedding. He had proposed on my birthday that September.

As I slid my arms through the sleeves of the dress, yet another contraction was coming.

I’m about to die!

I just knew that I was. This had to be death. I couldn’t possibly live through this pain.

“C’mon, sweetheart. We have to hurry. They’re coming quick.”

I always expected that through the pain and chaos, when I was in labor, I would be happy in expectancy of Little Alexis. But there was no excitement on our faces. Sure, I was in pain. Yet, I always expected that through the pain and chaos, when I was in labor, I would be happy in expectancy of Little Alexis. There was no happiness, though. The only feeling present was fear in both of our eyes as we wondered what could be happening to send me into premature labor.

Despite the deep breaths that I attempted to take during the contractions, the ride to the hospital was quiet. Luckily, our apartment was near campus, so the ride to the hospital was short. And once I was rushed into triage, it took an even shorter time for Alexis to come out.

My baby girl was stillborn. She never took one breath.

And right then, I felt as if I never wanted to take another one either.

****

I thought that was the worst day of my life, but, little did I know, three months later, I would experience much worse pain.

After losing Alexis, I had thrown myself back into school. I had even gotten a job as a receptionist on campus. I needed to stay busy in order to keep from revisiting the thoughts of losing my baby.  As if that weren’t enough, I felt like I was also losing Alex.

He wasn’t the same anymore. The excitement was gone from our love. Our apartment was silent and it was obvious that things weren’t the same.

We had both looked forward to our baby’s arrival with great anticipation—even more than when we received our college degrees.

She already had a room decorated in a Minnie Mouse theme, my favorite childhood character. Her closet was filled with clothes that I couldn’t wait to dress her in. I wasn’t just in mourning; I was joining my daughter in death, and it was a slow death I was succumbing to.

Courtney put an arm around me as we walked out of the 940 building. “He lost his baby too, honey. He’s also suffering,” Courtney tried convincing me.

Courtney had just gotten off of work and I had decided to leave early. I couldn’t take sitting at that desk in my misery for much longer.

I sighed. “I know. You’re right. I just wish that in his sadness, he would be there for me. I need him.”

I wrestled stubbornly with the tears that were coming, but I lost that fight.

“Aaaw, honey bunches,” Courtney said, as he wiped my tears in the middle of the street. “Fuck him. If he’s not there for you, then me and Tanisha will be. Well,
I will
. Tanisha is too far up in Kenny’s big ass to give a damn.”

I laughed and lightly smacked his arm. “Stop it! He is not big.”             

“You know that man is nice and plump!”

I was cracking up. Finally, I had the strength to keep walking. “I take offense to that, sir. I’m chubby.”

“No, you’re thick...” Courtney corrected me as he followed. “… with some baby weight–”

“Oh fuck you!”

“Nothing a little run on the treadmill won’t fix though, hunny! But Kenny? He is fat! Your girl is a chubby chaser!”

Courtney and I continued to giggle as we walked down Taylor. I didn’t know that meeting Courtney at work would be so much fun.

We were the same age. He was also a student at UIC. We clicked as soon as I started my job in the Dean’s office. I had already quit school, in preparation for Alexis. But I had continued to work my part–time job until Alexis was born. When Courtney met Tanisha, we instantly became the Three Musketeers… or Destiny’s Child, as Courtney liked to call us. He was Beyoncé… of course.

As I waited with Courtney at the bus stop for his bus, that would take him to the east side of the city, I sent Alex a text:

Hey, baby. How was your day?

We hadn’t talked since I left for work that morning, but that was normal when he was on–call. I wasn’t even expecting him to reply to my text message right away, but surprisingly, as Courtney’s bus came, he did.

“See you later, sweetie,” Courtney said, as he hugged me and kissed my cheek. “And try to cheer up.”

“I’ll try.”

I released Courtney so that he could get on his bus. As I did, I read Alex’s text:

Alex
:
Hey, love. It’s going good. Been a busy day, though. How is work?

Since he seemed to be in a better mood, I didn’t bother to interrupt it with mine:

Me
:
It’s going. Can’t wait to get home and lay with you. Pasta tonight?

Alex
:
Sounds great to me.

“Yes, he’s really in a good mood,” I said to myself, happily, as I turned onto Roosevelt. I figured that our night could be different. I would go home, take a warm bath, cook him dinner and just maybe we could make love.

We hadn’t made love in quite some time. First, I was healing from the labor. Then, both of our moods had been so shaky that we had probably had sex twice since Alexis died.

I was so relieved when I made it to our apartment building. Though every inch of our apartment reminded me of Alexis, I only felt like I could breathe when I was in those four walls. Any other time, I was faking my way through the day.