Crashing Into Love (20 page)

“We were pretty great.” She knew they would be better than before, because even this, here, now, was better.

“And we’ll be awesome now. Back then we had no idea what we were capable of or what life had in store for us. We were dreamers, and we were full of indestructible teenage rebellion.”

“You were filled with rebellion, and you still believe you’re indestructible.”

“Yeah, yeah. I know.” He laughed. “Don’t fool yourself, Fi. I think breaking up with me was rebellion, even if you don’t see it that way. It was your way of fighting back against your father for tearing apart your family, and that’s okay, because back then we didn’t know anything beyond what we felt. Now we’re armed with experience. So no more worrying about what might have been or what we didn’t get a chance to have. We’re lucky to have history to draw upon, but let’s not dwell on it. Let’s just see if we can blaze a new path to the future.”

“You’re really serious about us.” It wasn’t a question, and she didn’t need confirmation. It was a realization, an acceptance.

“Yes, I’m serious. Being with you again…” He shook his head and looked away, as if he were watching a memory unfold before him. “I had buried everything good. You know how close my family is, and you’ve made me realize that I’ve created distance even with them. They have no idea what to make of me anymore.”

“Yeah, they do.” Fiona clamped her mouth shut. She shouldn’t have said anything. Wes had done her a favor, and she didn’t want to breach his confidence.

“What do you mean?”

“Just that they know who you are and they love you.”

“Fi? You have that
cat ate the canary
look in your eyes.”

She tried to distract him, even though she knew he wouldn’t relent until she told him the truth. “Hey, look.” She pointed to a random outfit on the racks. “Let’s try those on.”

He took her by the shoulders, and his eyes turned serious. There was no way she could lie to him. She bit the insides of her cheeks in an effort to keep from spilling the truth.

“Fiona Steele, what did you do?” His lips rose in a half smile, half you’d-better-fess-up and half playful threat that would probably lead to his hands that had traveled to her ribs giving them a squeeze.

“Jake, please.” She trapped her lower lip in her teeth and closed her eyes tight.

“You think that’s going to save you?” He folded her into his arms and kissed her, slipping his tongue between her teeth and making her laugh. He lifted her a few inches off the ground, kissed her again, and then set her back down.

“Okay, okay. Just don’t tickle me.” She drew in a breath. “Just please don’t be mad at Wes. He was only trying to help, and actually, it was Callie who came up with the idea, so you can’t really blame your brother anyway.”

“Callie.” His eyes went serious again.

“Uh-huh. Well, and your mom.” She fiddled with the edge of her scarf.

“Great.” He shook his head.

“When I first got back to town, I stopped at Elisabeth’s to get a pie to bring to my mom, and your mom and Callie were there.”

He crossed his arms and lowered his chin, giving her a deadpan stare. “Go on.”

“Well, you know your mom and I have always gotten along.” There was no way for her to tell him without getting everyone in trouble. She reached for his hand, hardly able to believe she was going to tell him the truth and narc on his family.

“Can you please sit down? This is a lot to take in.”

“Christ.” He sat down, arms crossed, jaw muscles bunching, and set that stare on her again.

Fiona paced, deciding just to let it flow as fast as she possibly could, and once she began, she couldn’t stop.

“I
might
have mentioned to your mom how I felt about you, and she
might
have mentioned that she thought you never got over us, and Callie suggested that I talk to you, so we all decided that doing it in public—at the bar—was the best idea in case you got really mad.”

He leaned back and scrubbed his hand down his face. “Define
we
.”

“I’d rather not,” she said quietly.

“Fi.”

Her heart thundered like a freight train. She knelt beside him and placed her hands on his very tense thighs. He didn’t budge.

“I don’t know how it happened, but somehow everyone thought it was a good idea to try again, and I was so scared, but I saw something in your eyes, Jake. I felt it when you first looked at me, even through your anger. And I think your family must have seen it there, too.”

His silence was killing her.

“Talk to me, Jake. Please tell me that I didn’t just ruin any chance we had.”

He shifted his eyes away.

No, no, no!

“I don’t blame you for being mad, but—”

“Damn it, Fiona.”

She rose on shaky legs, and he tugged her down to his lap.

“You drive me fucking crazy,” he said with a rough tone. “And as for my family…”

“Please don’t be mad at them. All they really did was get you to the bar and the fair. That was it.” She was so nervous she could barely think. The last thing she wanted was to be the cause of Jake getting mad at his family.

“I’m not mad.” He let out a loud breath. “I might have to kick some Braden ass, but I’m not mad.”

She let out a relieved sigh. “Then what are you?”

He sealed his lips over hers. She resisted at first, shocked and worried about what she’d revealed, but the kiss wasn’t rough or angry. It was intense and somehow soothing at once. When they drew apart, the anger in Jake’s eyes had softened.

“I have no idea what I am. It’s hard to accept that my family saw right through me when I didn’t even know this part of me was trapped inside. But I’m damn glad they did.” He hugged her close. “Stay with me tonight, Fi. Please?”

FIONA WAS QUIET on the way to her apartment. She fidgeted with her hair and the edge of her seat, and she remained quiet when they stopped at her apartment to pick up her things for the next day before going to Jake’s house.

“Are you okay, babe?”

“Yeah. Fine.”

He doubted that, but it was obvious that she didn’t want to talk as she gazed out the window. Jake used the silence to try to process what she’d told him. He remembered how hard Pierce had pushed him to stay in Trusty and go to the fair and how his brothers had given him shit for being a prick to Fiona. Now it all made sense—except Jake wanted to know why they could see feelings he hadn’t known he still had.

At his house, he grabbed Fiona’s bag from the trunk and slung it over his shoulder, then draped an arm around her, feeling tension in her movements.

“I’m really not mad,” he assured her.

“It’s not that.” She fidgeted with the ends of her hair as he opened the door. She hesitated at the entrance.

“Come on, babe.” He took her hand and led her inside, still trying to get a read on what was troubling her. Her steps were slow and reluctant. He set her bag down by the foyer and pulled her into his arms. Her eyes darted around the room, settling on the glass doors that led to the backyard.

“Don’t worry. Susie’s spread the word. We shouldn’t be bothered, okay?” He tucked her hair behind her ear and kissed her forehead.

She shrugged. “It feels funny this time.”

“More so than last time?” He wished women came with a handbook.

“A little. Jake, this is going to sound really stupid, but being here makes me think about all the other women you’ve been with.” She lowered her eyes.

He lifted her chin and pressed a soft kiss to her lips. “I understand, and I’m sorry it’s hurtful. I can’t change the past, but I can tell you that I’ve never had another woman in my bedroom.”

She rolled her eyes and scoffed. “I thought we were trying to be a couple, which means honesty, Jake. I’m a big girl, not a fool.”

Jake took her hand and led her through the living room, down a narrow hallway, and stopped before a closed door. “You’ll probably judge me by this, too, but I never wanted anyone in my room.”

“I’m not judging you, just being honest about how I feel. You used to take me to your bedroom all the time, and that was in your mother’s house. Do you really expect me to believe that you haven’t taken women into your bedroom in your own house?”

“Jesus, Fi. I never understood why I didn’t want a woman in my room.” He stepped closer and held her hands. “It was because of you. I didn’t realize it until just now, but when I brought you here, I brought you straight up to my room. You’re the only woman who’s ever been in there besides my cleaning lady.”

He pushed open the door to the guest room, revealing a very plain king-sized bed and a dresser. The walls were white and unadorned. A black comforter matched the dark curtains. He watched Fiona’s eyes slide over the furniture. She tilted her head to one side, opened her mouth to say something, then closed it. She released his hand and stepped into the room, turning slowly. Whatever she was thinking had her brows knitted together. She drew in a deep breath, then walked out of the room, pulled him away from the door, and closed it.

“Okay.” She nodded and headed for the stairs.

“Okay?” He hurried after her as she walked upstairs and into his bedroom like she owned the place—and he loved it.

She spun around and smiled, closing in on him. She grabbed his shirt and tugged his face down to hers.

“I feel like you were telling me the truth, and I may be stupid, or maybe I felt what I wanted to feel, but I felt nothing but coldness in that room down there, and up here…It’s hot, baby. Hot. Hot. Hot.”

He wrapped an arm around her waist and ground his hips against her, tangling his other hand in her hair as he took her in a thought-stealing kiss. A wanton sound hitched in her throat, vibrating through their mouths and pulling him under. She was hot and sweet and kissed him greedily. Her hands grasped his hair, his back, his ass. Damn, he loved it when she grabbed his ass. He tugged her head back, and their lips parted with a rush of air. Her lips were plump and wet, her skin pink from his unshaven cheeks. Her lids were heavy, her eyes dark and sensuous as he took her lower lip between his teeth and sucked it into his mouth. She gripped his arms, her nails digging into his biceps as he swept his tongue over hers, then went for her neck, kissing, grazing his teeth over her skin. Her body began to tremble, her breathing became shallow. She clawed at his arm like she wanted to climb beneath his skin and fisted her other hand in his hair, pressing his teeth tighter to her flesh. His arousal throbbed beneath his zipper, aching for release.

She yanked his hair, tearing his lips from her neck. Her eyes were past seductive, past lust-filled. They’d gone straight to
fuck-me-hard
. He tightened his grip as she dragged her tongue along the edge of his jaw, taking him with her to that darker place where only they existed. He lifted her in his arms, burying his tongue in her mouth as he walked the few steps to his bed and set her down beneath him. He kneed her legs open wide. Her skirt hitched up to her hips as he rocked his arousal against her center and lifted her knees so he could press in tighter to her precious curves. She clawed at his back. He ripped his shirt off and pulled her mouth to his nipple, holding her there as she sucked and kissed him into near bursting. He couldn’t take it much longer—he had to have her. He groaned with need, and her head fell back, giving him space to tear off her shirt and bra, leaving her bare from the waist up.

“Perfect. You’re fucking perfect.” He took her nipple, and much of her breast, into his mouth. She arched in to him, holding his head in place.

“God, Jake.” She ground her hips against his hard length. “Please, now, Jake. Please.”

He circled her nipple with his tongue, then moved to her other breast, giving it just as much attention as the first as he slid his hand between her legs and nearly lost his mind at the feel of her hot, wet panties. He had to taste her again. Once was never enough with Fiona. A hundred times wouldn’t be enough. He tore the rest of her clothes from her body and lowered his mouth between her legs, groaning against her wetness as he loved her body in all the ways he’d missed for so very long. Fiona gasped for breath, fisting her hands in the sheets. Her hips thrust off the mattress and he pressed them back down, knowing how she loved his strength, his control, as he brought his mouth to her again, feeling the orgasm rip through her body.

“Oh…God…” she moaned.

He slowed his efforts, prolonging her pleasure, and slipped his fingers inside her, seeking the sensitive spot that would bring her over the edge again.

“Jake.” She panted.

“Again, baby. Come for me again.” He lowered his mouth to her again and felt her inner muscles clamp down as she gave in to the momentum of another orgasm and cried out his name.

“Jake. Please.” She writhed beneath his grasp. “I have to feel you inside me.”

He stood long enough to shed his clothing, then moved up her body and buried his tongue in her mouth, pressing his erection against her wet center as he reached for a condom. Jesus, she felt amazing. What he wouldn’t give to plunge into her and feel her wetness swallow him whole.

“Hurry,” she pleaded as he rose to roll the condom on.

He eased her legs farther apart with his knees and laced his fingers with hers, pressing her hands to the mattress. His body pulsed with need, and he was powerless to slow his urgency.

“I don’t want to be gentle, Fi,” he said quickly and probably too harshly.

“Then don’t.”

Her hips rose up to meet him, and he thrust into her, hard. They both gasped a breath at their joining, but he couldn’t tame his ache for her. He thrust balls-deep over and over again, each time earning a gasp of pleasure from Fiona. He sealed his lips over hers and kissed her hard, his whole body thrumming with desire. When she wrapped her legs around his waist, he nearly came undone. He tore his lips away, wanting to see the need in her eyes. The rapture on her face made his heart fill with love. She was his. Open and loving. She knew just what he needed, and the realization revved him up even more. He ground his hips to hers. They were as close as two people could be as he kissed her neck, stroking the sensitive skin beneath her ear as her legs fell open, and her body began to pulsate around him.