Crush (15 page)

CHAPTER TWENTY

MIA

Of course, due to sheer bad luck, Brad and I never got the few minutes we needed alone before we both had to head back to college. Barely even thirty seconds. There were a few stolen kisses in the bathroom and in the kitchen when Dad and Karen couldn’t see, but they were almost always around, and it was too risky to try anything else.

It was like they both had a radar for the fact that their kids were now trying to sleep with each other, so for the rest of the winter break they were around us twenty-four-seven. They hadn’t actually said anything to us about it which might imply that they knew, but dammit, they were always
there.

One time, Brad and I had plotted to sneak out and get a motel room for a few hours, but my Dad had foiled that plan. He’d seen us leaving the house and asked where we were going, and when we’d lied and said we were going to go shopping, he’d invited himself along, all in the name of spending quality time with us before we went back to school.

Goddammit. I loved my Dad, and I loved Karen, but holy hell…I just wanted an hour alone with Brad!

Unfortunately, a week went by, and we didn’t get that hour, let alone more than a few seconds. When Brad had to return to Hattiesburg for work and the start of semester, he came to my room to say goodbye, and he promised that things would be different once classes had started.

“Think about it,” he’d murmured in a low voice so our parents wouldn’t hear from downstairs. “We can drive to see each other at our places without worrying about our parents catching us. Just a couple more days, and we’re set.”

He was right. It would be a lot easier for us to see each other on our respective campuses, rather than having to sneak around McComb, but the idea made it palpably obvious that we were doing the wrong thing. If hooking up with each other was the right thing to do, then we shouldn’t have had to plan it around a bunch of secrets and lies.

But that wasn’t going to stop us.

No way. I’d almost felt him inside me that New Year’s afternoon, and I wasn’t going to stop until I experienced it for real. I
needed
it. It seemed so crass for me to be thinking of myself as the girl who
needed
a guy’s cock, but here I was, dreaming every spare minute away with thoughts of Brad’s naked body crushed up against mine.

Right now, I was in the main coffee shop on campus, reading through some old lecture notes on my laptop and trying my hardest not to soak my panties with more thoughts of Brad. Even in the warmth of the coffee shop, I was still freezing, and I wrapped both hands around the hot mug of coffee I’d bought a few moments earlier, trying to keep them warm.

“Mia? Hi!”

I glanced up at the sound of my name. The brunette girl standing by my table looked familiar, and I realized who she was a second later.

“Oh, hi. Amanda, right?” I said, putting my mug down.

“Yep. I forgot you said you go here,” she replied, glancing around the student café.

“Yeah, I do. It’s my second year. What are you doing on campus?” I asked.

“Visiting a friend of mine. She’s in a sorority here. Kappa Omega. Are you in it?”

I shook my head. “No, I’m not in any sororities.”

“I guess they aren’t for everyone,” she said with a smile. “Anyway, how’s Brad?”

“He’s okay. I’ll tell him you said hi.”

“Cool. Thanks. Anyway, it was nice seeing you again.”

She started to walk over to a free table but then stopped and turned around. “Oh, Mia? I know this is none of my business, but just be careful around Brad. I saw him groping you at the mall the other day when we ran into each other, and…well…just don’t let him get too close to you. Don’t fall for his crap.”

I arched an eyebrow. “What do you mean?”

“Well, I’m sure you know what happened between me and him. I’m over it now, but it screwed me up at the time. I’d hate to see the same thing happen to you. You seem so nice. Anyway, I better head off. My friend will be here in a few minutes.”

“Wait,” I said as she turned away again. “What are you talking about?”

A look of uncertainty crossed her face. “Oh. Sorry. I thought you might already know,” she said slowly.

“Know what?”

She looked around the café, as if she were afraid of being heard, and then she sat down across from me and leaned in. “You don’t know about me and Brad?”

I shook my head slowly, and her eyes went wide. “Oh, crap…of course you don’t. Sorry. I shouldn’t have said anything.”

“All he’s ever told me about you is that you’re super interested in him and that you text him all the time trying to hook up with him,” I said, my face marred by confusion.

She looked mortified and then rolled her eyes. “Ugh, of course he’s saying that. You wanna know the truth?”

“Sure,” I said before draining what was left of my coffee. I had no idea what the hell she was on about, but I was interested to find out if she was as crazy as Brad said she was.

“Okay, well, you know that Brad was my stepbrother for seven years, right?”

“Uh-huh.”

“I’m sure he’s told you I had a massive crush on him when we were younger. He’s right. I mean, of course I did. He’s gorgeous. He always rejected me, but when he headed off to college, that all changed.”

“How so?” I asked, my curiosity piqued even further. Surely she wasn’t saying what I thought she might be saying…

“He joined that frat when he started…Alpha something-rather. Anyway, I guess they were your typical manly-men, always competing over who’d scored the hottest chick on the weekend or whatever. But then they took it further. They decided to make some kind of competition pool. I’m not sure what else you’d call it. They all put money in, and then whoever won the competition got all the cash at the end of the semester.”

“What was the competition?”

“To hook up with the most off-limits chick. The most ‘taboo pussy’ as they so eloquently put it. A few of them tried to sleep with professors, but they didn’t succeed. Brad ended up winning. He managed to get the most out-of-bounds girl out of all of them.”

I had a feeling I knew exactly where this was going now. “You mean he got you?” I asked in a small voice, barely daring to believe it might be true.

She cast her eyes down at the table. “Yeah. He came home one weekend, and he was being way nicer than usual and making all these excuses to touch me. Kind of like what it looked like he was doing to you at the mall when I saw you. It was weird, but because I’d always had a crush on him, I was happy and didn’t think twice about it. Then he came into my room and told me he’d always had a thing for me, but he hadn’t felt right about pursuing it while we were still living together under the same roof. Seeing as he was now off at college, he thought it was okay to do something about it. He kissed me, and then…one thing led to another. I slept with him. After that, I thought we were going to be together, but he disappeared the next morning. I called and texted and he never responded.”

She took a deep breath and continued. “I finally managed to get hold of one of his frat brothers at the house, and he told me the truth. He said Brad had only slept with me because I was ‘off-limits’, seeing as I was his stepsister, and he won the prize pool because of it.”

I shook my head slowly. Her story was crazy. It couldn’t possibly be true.

“That really doesn’t sound like something Brad would do,” I said quietly.

“I know, right? Don’t be fooled. He seemed so nice to me when it all went down. He’s nice to you, right? And he acts like he’s really into you?”

I nodded, and she sighed.

“I figured as much. Think about it this way. There are forty guys in that frat, and they all put in two hundred bucks that first year. So he won eight grand for sleeping with me. You know what he’s like. He’s obsessed with making money. He’d do anything to make a little extra. I don’t think anything is out of bounds for him when it comes to that.”

I picked at a fingernail as her story sunk in. Now that she’d brought up the money thing, it was starting to make more sense. He
was
pretty money-hungry, even if it was all for his Mom like he’d told me. I knew Amanda wasn’t making that part up.

“If he hurt you so much by doing that, then why do you still talk to him?” I asked.

She shrugged. “Like I said, I’m mostly over it now. It was ages ago. I didn’t speak to him for six months after it happened, even while our parents were divorcing, but then I just got over it. I lived with him for so long when we were kids, and it just felt wrong to cut him out, even after what he did. So I started messaging him occasionally to see how he was doing in life, and that’s it. I’d never want to sleep with him again, if that’s what you’re asking. And I’d definitely never trust him again.”

I looked right into her eyes. “Why are you telling me all of this, Amanda?”

She matched my unwavering gaze. “Because you seem like a nice girl, like I said earlier. I’m willing to bet they still have a prize pool in that disgusting frat, and that makes you a target for him if he wants to win again. When I saw him touching you in the mall like that and realized who you were, it got me a little worried. I even thought about finding you on Facebook and warning you, but I figured you’d think I was some crazy stalker if I did that. I guess it’s lucky I ran into you here.”

My stomach churned, and Amanda reached across and patted my hand. “Look, I know he’s probably told you I’m totally batshit insane or whatever, just so you’d never find out the truth before he got what he wanted. You don’t have to believe me, but just promise me you’ll be careful. Watch yourself around him, and don’t trust him if he tries to seduce you. Take it from me – you’ll only end up getting hurt.”

I nodded again, unable to find the words to reply yet, and the café door chimed a second later. Amanda turned her head to look and then stood up as a girl with black hair and mocha-colored skin walked in.

“Sorry to leave you like this, but my friend just got here. If you want, you could come hang out with us?” she said, her forehead wrinkled with concern.

I forced a smile. “Thanks, but I think I’ll just go back to the library. I have a lot of reading to catch up on.”

I’d been spending so much time mooning over Brad lately that I’d barely done any study at all. Well, at least I didn’t have to worry about that anymore. I was going to banish him from my mind so that all I’d have to concern myself with was textbooks and lectures.

The rational part of my mind told me that I needed to at least confront Brad and find out if what I’d just heard was actually true. After all, even though Amanda had seemed genuine in everything she’d just said, there was a chance she was actually making it all up for God-knows-what reason. Perhaps she was still obsessed with him, and seeing him grope me at the mall had made her wildly jealous…jealous enough to make things up to keep me away from him. Sort of like a ‘
if I can’t have him, no one can’
type of thing.

Suddenly I couldn’t wait until I saw Brad in person. I needed to know right now. As Amanda headed away from the table with her friend, I sent a quick text to him.

What’s this I’ve heard about a prize pool at your frat for hooking up with girls?

He replied almost immediately.
Who told you about that? Look, I can explain.

Holy crap.

It was true. There really
was
a prize pool. White hot anger seared through me, and I ignored his text and immediately blocked his number from my phone. I didn’t need to hear any of his excuses.

I mentally kicked myself as I stared into space, still unable to believe what had just happened. God, no wonder he’d been so nice to me lately…it was all an act.

I’d been
this
close to sleeping with him the other day. Thank God Karen had come home when she did.

I couldn’t blame Amanda for falling for him when he’d tried to seduce her. He was hot as hell, and it was hard to resist a man like him. However, after what she’d just told me, there was no way I was going anywhere near him again. I was probably just one of many girls he had going at any given time, and I was willing to bet that Rose girl was on his hook too, even though he’d done nothing but tell me she was ‘nuts’. Just like he’d said about Amanda. I bet he said the exact same thing about me behind my back too.

Bastard.

Trying to get me in bed was just a sick game, and I was literally a prize to him; a forbidden, inaccessible girl to conquer for some extra cash.

My Mom had always told me that hate was a strong word. I’d strongly disliked people before, but I’d never hated anyone. However, that wasn’t the case now.

Right now, I honestly felt like I hated Brad Eriksson.

CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE

BRAD

What the fuck had just happened?

Mia had texted me asking about the prize pool tradition at my frat, and then there’d been radio silence from her. Nothing. Nada. She wouldn’t answer any more of my texts, and my calls bounced straight to her voicemail.

Someone must have gotten inside her head and convinced her that there was more to the prize pool than there was. It was just a stupid old tradition which I had no intention of even taking part in, other than the little bit of cash I’d thrown in so my frat brothers could have fun with it if they wanted. I didn’t give a shit about winning anything for hooking up with heaps of girls…but Mia didn’t know that. Shit, she probably thought she was part of the competition; just one of the girls on my roster or something like that.

But who the hell had told her that?

When my fifth call went to voicemail, I grabbed my keys, strode out of the house and got into my car. I was on a mission. If she wasn’t going to let me explain anything over the phone, then I was going straight to her dorm. I knew exactly where it was, because she’d talked about it so much, and although Overton was a two hour drive away, that didn’t matter. Any amount of time or distance was worth it if it meant not losing her before we’d even really begun anything.

By the time I arrived at Overton, it was late afternoon, and I parked in the visitor’s parking lot before making my way to her dorm. When I rapped on the door, Mia didn’t answer, but a familiar-looking girl did. She was tall with dark eyes and shoulder-length brown hair, and her eyebrows shot up as she saw me standing there.

“Hey. Brad, right?”

“Yeah,” I said, finally remembering where I’d seen her. I’d seen her with Mia at the Halloween party all those weeks ago. “You must be Tamara.”

“Sure am,” she said. “Are you looking for Mia?”

“Yeah. Is she in?”

“Sorry, she isn’t. I think she’s at the library. I just came to drop off some books I borrowed from her the other day. Spare key,” she said, holding up a silver key by way of explanation. “Was she expecting you?”

“Nah. I just thought I’d come visit.”

Her eyes narrowed slightly, as if she didn’t believe I’d randomly pop in for a visit, but she smiled anyway. “Right. Well, I’m sure she won’t mind if I let you in. You can just hang out here till she gets back.”

“Cool. Thanks.”

She stepped aside, and I took a seat on the end of Mia’s bed, casting my eyes around the room. It smelled of her perfume, and it was decorated with accented cushions, a few framed photos of her friends and family, and a shelf full of books. It was just like her; pretty, fresh and clean.

“Anyway, I better be off,” Tamara said, pulling one last book out of her tote bag and setting it on the desk. “Nice to meet you, Brad. Mia’s been holding you at arm’s length from all of us.”

I grinned, and she went to leave but then turned around again. “Before I go, do you mind if I ask you something?”

“Sure.”

She hesitated for a second. “It’s just…you probably don’t know any more than I do, but you’ve been spending a lot of time with Mia lately. Do you know what’s going on with her? She’s been kinda weird for the last few weeks. I feel like there’s something she isn’t telling me.”

I knew exactly what was going on, but I couldn’t tell Tamara that. Whatever had been happening between Mia and me, it was between us, and no one else could know.

At least not yet.

“No idea,” I said with a shrug. “She’s seemed pretty normal to me lately. Although I guess I haven’t known her for as long as you.”

She studied me for a moment, and then she smiled again. “Okay. Just thought I’d check. See ya later.”

I waited in Mia’s room for two more hours before she finally showed up. When I heard her fumbling with her keys on the other side of the door, every hair on my body stood on end, and my heart thumped loudly with anticipation. Finally the door swung open, and she dropped her bag in surprise as she saw me sitting on the bed.

“What are you doing here?” she asked. Her voice was ice cold. “How’d you get in?”

“Tamara let me in. You weren’t answering my calls or messages, so I came to see you,” I replied.

“That really wasn’t necessary,” she said. “You could’ve just taken the hint.”

“And what hint would that be, Mia? The hint that you don’t wanna talk to me? Don’t worry, I got that loud and clear. But I think I deserve an explanation.”

She put her hands on her hips. “Oh, you do? Well, seeing as you came all this way, here’s your explanation. Amanda told me all about your pathetic little competition and how you’re just using me to win it. So get out. You’ve made your bed…now you can go fuck yourself in it!”

“What the hell? Amanda?”

As far as I knew, Amanda wasn’t even aware of the prize pool at the frat. When Mom had still been married to Vince, Carter had come to visit the old family home with me a few times, so there was a high chance she may have overheard us jokingly talking about it. But still, what the fuck was wrong with her? Why the fuck had she hunted down Mia and told her about it?

“Yes, Amanda,” Mia repeated.

I held my hands up. “Wanna gimme a few seconds to explain? I tried calling when you texted me about it, but I guess you blocked my calls.”

She folded her arms. “Sure, Brad,” she said, her voice tinged with sarcasm. “Go ahead. Although I don’t see what you could possibly say to make it sound better than it is.”

I sighed. “Look, it’s a stupid old bullshit tradition the frat has. Everyone chucks some money in, and then it’s awarded to whoever hooks up with the most chicks that year. Yes, it’s a bit gross, but no one actually takes it seriously. I don’t even give a single fuck about it. I just throw some cash in like everyone else, and whoever wins shouts us all drinks at a bar with their winnings. That’s it. Like I said, I’m not even trying to be a real part of it. I don’t go around tallying up all the chicks I hook up with. In fact, since I met you, you’ve been the only one.”

“That’s not what Amanda told me,” Mia replied, her eyes narrowed.

I threw up my hands in exasperation. “Well, what the fuck did she tell you?”

She looked down at the floor. “She said the real competition was to see which one of you could sleep with the most off-limits girl. She said you won in your first year at college by sleeping with her, seeing as she was your stepsister at the time. Then she said you’d probably try to do the same with me so you could win again. Get the most ‘taboo pussy’, as you guys put it.”

She arranged her fingers into air quotes as she said ‘taboo pussy’, and I jumped to my feet.

“
What
?” I said. “Are you fucking kidding me? Jesus Christ, Mia, I told you she’s crazy! What the hell are you doing listening to her?”

“Did you sleep with her?” she asked, dark eyes flashing as she ignored my question.

“No! Of course not. I told you, she’s always been obsessed with me. She’s just trying to fuck with your head.”

She didn’t reply, and I could tell she still didn’t entirely believe me. “Look, I’ll prove it you,” I said, whipping out my cell phone. “I’ll call Carter right now. You can talk to him. He’ll tell you all about the prize pool, and how it’s basically just a joke. It’s got
nothing
to do with hooking up with off-limits women.”

Mia sat down, suddenly looking exhausted. She shook her head. “Don’t call him,” she said softly. “Don’t call anyone. I just…”

Her voice trailed off, and I walked over to her and crouched down so that her eyes were level with mine. “Just what? You really thought this was all some sort of game to me?”

She nodded, and I grasped her right hand with mine. “Mia, this has never been anything like that. Fuck, I’ve wanted you since I first saw you. There’s no games; no ulterior motives. Amanda is totally full of shit.”

“I guess she saw you touching me at the mall and got really jealous,” she said quietly, dropping her gaze to the ground again. “She probably thought that if she couldn’t have you, then she’d make sure no one else could.”

“Sounds about right. But I swear, I’m telling the truth. The competition is a joke. I’m not taking part in it, and you’re certainly not part of it.”

She raised her head, and I could see that her eyes were getting watery. “I’m sorry. I should have spoken to you about it first. I just got so upset because it seems like there’s all these girls after you, and you could have any one of them. It’s not just Amanda. It’s your ex-girlfriend too, and all those sorority girls. Everywhere we go, there’s all these women staring at you, and I don’t get why you’d want me when you could have them.”

I squeezed her hand tighter. “Mia, you’ve gotta listen to me. There are no other girls. Amanda is nothing to me. Same with Rose. I don’t want either of them, or any other girl, for that matter. No one else. It’s only you, Mia. You’re perfect.”

A solitary tear slid down her cheek, and she whispered to me a second later. “You think I’m insane now, right?”

“Of course not. And look,” I said, showing her my phone. “Fuck Amanda. The only reason I still speak to her at all was because I felt bad for ignoring her, seeing as she was my sister for so long. But no more. I’m blocking her number, and if she ever manages to contact me in any other way, I’ll tell her to get fucked.”

She nodded, and I scrolled down to Rose’s contact details. “Look. I’m blocking and deleting Rose as well. I should’ve done it months ago.”

“You don’t have to do that,” she mumbled. “I should’ve trusted you. I know you. I shouldn’t have jumped to conclusions and shut you out so fast.”

“No, I want to do this. I want you to know that it’s only been you in my life since I first met you. Shit, even when I thought you hated me, I still wanted you more than anything, and I never even fucking looked at another chick.”

She sighed. “Don’t you think it’s just too hard? We’ve almost gotten together so many times now, and something always comes along and ruins it. Every single freaking time. Don’t you think it’s a sign that we shouldn’t do it? Our parents are married, Brad. If they ever found out…”

“It’s not too hard,” I said. “The best things in life are worth working for. Sure, our parents are gonna be fucking mad when they find out, but we’ll cross that bridge when we come to it.”

“And when will we come to it?”

I shook my head. “I don’t know. But right now isn’t the time. We need to wait a while until we’ve thought of the perfect way to break it to them. Right now I just can’t think how.”

A half-smile turned the corners of her lips up. “I guess sneaking around behind everyone’s backs does make it kinda hot,” she murmured.

“You fucking bet it does,” I growled, pulling her to her feet. She gasped, and I crushed her lips with mine.

This was it. We were finally alone together, and nothing was standing in our way.