Cunning (Infidelity #2) (32 page)

“Alton…”

“Shhh, Laide, listen to me. Don’t think. Don’t speak. Give in to me.”

I wanted to. I wanted to feel what I hadn’t felt since before Alexandria. I wanted from him what I’d only experienced with my own touch.

“You’re now mine. Tell me that you’ll submit to me.”

I already had. Admitting it wasn’t difficult.

The next two weeks passed, days sightseeing and nights learning more about my husband. I was finally able to show him my negligee, and he was able to bring me to orgasm more often than not. It was more than I’d ever accomplished before. Even when I didn’t, he did. I took comfort in that.

The part of marriage that concerned me was Alton’s obsession with Montague. Even on our honeymoon, he was in constant contact with the office and my father. It was new to be together twenty-four hours a day. With so much time, I saw a side of him that I’d never fully recognized. The snippets I’d seen, I’d been able to rationalize. Now it was harder.

Whether it was business related, poor service in a restaurant, or a comment from me, Alton’s speed to anger unnerved me.

It was different than my father, more than words. I was used to domination—a fact of my existence as my father’s daughter—but being on the receiving end of a slap was new. The first time it happened was in our suite, less than a week into our marriage. He’d just finished a conversation with someone on the telephone. I knew he was upset, but we had reservations and a tour guide waiting. I don’t recall exactly what I said, but I’ll never forget the sting of his palm as it connected with my cheek.

With my eyes filled with tears, I stared, unsure what to do or say. I was fearful of more, but that didn’t happen. Instead, he simply looked annoyed and asked, “What, Adelaide?”

“I-I can’t believe—”

“Don’t.”

My lips pressed into a straight line.

“Don’t push me,” he warned. “Your job is to support me. Do you intend to quit that job—to fail another husband?”

I didn’t respond.

“If you think you can tell Daddy what I did and our agreement will be null and void, you’re mistaken. Moreover, I’m sure you don’t want to disappoint him—again. You and I—we’re in this for the long haul. I suggest you fix your makeup, plaster a smile on your face, and hurry. We have a tour to enjoy, Mrs. Fitzgerald.”

Alton knew exactly what to say, which of my buttons to push. His venomous words stung, their poison exacting my obedience. Later I’d reflect and wonder how much Suzy told him about me and my insecurities, but at the time my mind couldn’t process that far. My hands shook as I did as he said and reasoned that he was right about the agreement as well as my job or role, depending on who was describing it. My duty was to support him, not irritate him. By the time I stepped back into the bedroom of our suite, I had my smile securely in place.

It was a good thing. More than once our photo was captured as we toured the ancient ruins.

WAKING EXHAUSTED YET
content, I lay in the darkness of the hotel suite, listening to the beat of Nox’s heart. My head rested against his chest while his arm surrounded my shoulder. His body warmed me and his hold reassured me. I’d never imagined the overwhelming joy that came with giving myself completely to another person.

Cathartic and liberating, the words seemed wrong for the actions of the night, yet from my soul I couldn’t form others. The tension I’d caused was gone—cleansed away. Mindful of my tolerance, Nox ensured my punishment didn’t last long, and the reward afterward made it worth every lash. With my behind on fire, he filled me, taking my attention away from the intensity of my outside to the sheer ecstasy happening within me. He was barely inside of me when I came with a release I’d never known. With no buildup or climb, a bomb exploded, the detonation shattering me. Starting from the tips of my curled toes, wave after wave crashed through me until forming words was beyond my capabilities. My nails bit crescent moons deep into my palms as my fists balled. The screaming of his name gave way to moans and whimpers. I was completely wrung out as my body convulsed around his, and the night had only begun.

At some point we drank wine and ate food. If I hadn’t been the one to order it, I wouldn’t have been able to say what it was we ate. Most of the meal came to my lips via Nox’s fingers as my hands were useless, bound behind me in an elaborate weave of satin. The dependence made each bite of food or drink of wine more fulfilling, more intoxicating. It was as if the fine French wine’s alcohol content far exceeded the legal limit. Each morsel or sip brought to my lips at his discretion was a hit from a drug, the lack of control stimulating my bloodstream like cocaine.

As we were about to fall asleep, I remembered things I wanted to say, information from Chelsea he’d want to know, yet settling into the cloud of musk, the lingering scent of sex, wax, and desire, I let them all slip away. I wasn’t hiding any of it from him. I wanted to relish the aftermath of our reunion. Make-up sex was all my mind could comprehend.

Now, awakened by nothing in particular, those thoughts again weren’t at the forefront of my mind. Another one was. Stirring, Nox turned toward me as my head slipped to his bicep, and I curled into him. Skin to skin, my fingers splayed upon his chest.

“Are you awake?” he whispered.

“Yes.”

His gravelly voice rippled through the night. “Are you ready for round two?”

“Two?” I laughed. “I think you lost count. How about five or six?”

His lips brushed my forehead. “Then round seven?”

I shook my head. “Not really.” I didn’t want to admit how sore I was—in a good way. “I like this.”

His arm tightened around me. “Me too, princess.”

An unexpected tear leaked from my eye as the weight of our agreement settled over me. Quickly, I brushed it away, not wanting to ruin what we’d accomplished. Of course, I wasn’t successful.
Mr. Intuitive
hovered over me, his handsome features shadowed by the darkness.

“What happened?” He stiffened, lifting his torso higher as if to see me clearer. “Did I go too far? I know what I said, but I was wrong. You may always express your limits. I never want to harm you.”

I shook my head. “It’s not… no.” I reached up, caressing his cheek, loving the stubble below the tips of my fingers. “Nox, you absolutely overwhelm me. I feel things with you I never knew existed.” I wasn’t sure how to verbalize what I felt. “It’s not just sex, though as you may have noticed, I’m not complaining.

“It’s you, being with you, sleeping with you, talking with you… I just wish…”

I let my voice and words trail away, swallowing the emotion I didn’t want to share.

“You wish what?”

When I didn’t answer, he lifted my chin. “Charli? Don’t make me ask again. You’re the one who brought it up.”

“I was stupid and impulsive.”

“I know you’re too smart to bring up a recent topic. What are you talking about?”

I pulled away from his grasp and threw back the covers. In the dark room, I found my robe lying on a nearby chair and wrapped it around myself, securing the tie. Before he could ask his question again, I said, “You know what I did. You just don’t know why I did it.”

Nox was out of bed, his nakedness coming closer. His height dwarfed me as we both stood barefooted, staring in the darkness.

“All right. Tell me. Tell me why you did it, and then I’ll know what the fuck you’re talking about.”

Apprehension flooded my nervous system, fear that my honesty would sabotage our progress, yet equally fearful of leaving secrets unspoken. I noticed the clock near the bed. It was nearly three o’clock in the morning. We should be sleeping. Then again, that was six o’clock in New York, where we would spend the majority of our day.

“Nox, I’m sorry. We should be sleeping.”

He quickly slipped into a pair of gym shorts, turned, and cupped my cheek. “If something is bothering you enough to interrupt your sleep, it should interrupt mine too. Give it to me, Charli. Let me help you.”

I took a step back. “You can’t help me.” I shrugged, my arms slapping my sides. “Actually you did, but it’s too late for more.”

With my eyes now adjusted to the darkness, I watched as he ran his hand through his hair.

“You’re infuriating.”

“Me? Why?”

“Because,” he explained, reaching for my hand and pulling me to a nearby sofa, “I hear you respond, but I have no fucking idea what you’re saying or talking about.”

“Infidelity.” The word hung in the air, a reminder of my stupidity.

When Nox didn’t respond, I went on, unsuccessful at keeping my words devoid of emotion. “I-I want to be here with you. After we left Del Mar, I cried… mourned… what we shared was more than I could’ve ever imagined. At first I wanted only one week. Chelsea told me I deserved it. She said men do it all the time. But, Nox, I couldn’t. I couldn’t separate sex with you from emotion.”

I stood, needing to move. “Maybe it’s because I’m female… but you got inside me…” My cheeks flushed. “…in more ways than one.”
Okay, that wasn’t what I meant
. “I hope you know what I’m trying to say.”

He reached for my hand and pulled me closer. “I know exactly what you mean.”

I collapsed on his lap, the warmth of his embrace surrounding me.

“I just wish that now…”

“Go on.”

“I wish that it wasn’t different. I don’t want to be
owned
. I don’t want to be obligated to a defined time period. I want real.

“I’m worried that the only reason you came back to the suite last night was because you had to—because of the agreement. I’m afraid that if you could’ve left me, gotten on the airplane and gone back to New York, you would have.”

His words slowed, heavy with emotion. “You thought I’d leave you here?”

“No,” I corrected. “I was afraid you
wanted to
. I didn’t think you would.”

“I didn’t want to. I don’t want to.” His chest heaved as he smoothed my hair over my shoulder and tucked a piece behind my ear. “I was upset. I know there are things we need to share. It’s difficult for me to explain. What made me… what made Del Mar special was that you didn’t know me.”

I looked up at his beautiful features—his chiseled jawline and the way his brow protruded—as he carefully chose his words. I considered telling him to stop. I didn’t need to know any more if it brought him pain. But I couldn’t.

“You didn’t see me the way I’ve been portrayed. It was refreshing and invigorating. You even mentioned my boss or bosses. You weren’t infatuated with money or standing. You were just you.” He played with my hair again. “The most beautiful woman to catch my eye in years. I didn’t enter our week wanting more, but I sure as hell left it wanting that.

“It took every ounce of self-control I possessed to let you leave me that morning.”

“Why did you put your number in my phone?”

“Because I wanted you to break our rule.”

“So you could punish me?” My behind still smarted as I asked the question.

“No, so I could see you again. I told you that I take what I want. I didn’t want to take you. I wanted you to come back to me because you wanted me.”

Another renegade tear descended my cheek.

Nox wiped it away with the pad of his thumb. “Don’t cry, princess.”

“I wanted to call you… “My phrases were separated by my stuttered breathing. “So many times I stared at your number, but my life is… was… hell, I don’t know… it’s crazy. I wanted to concentrate on school. And then it all imploded. I just wish I hadn’t signed and you hadn’t signed. I wish this was real and not a business agreement.”

He kissed my forehead. “As far as I’m concerned it’s real. I’m sorry you don’t feel that way.”

“But you made a point…”

His kiss moved to my lips. “I’m an ass. You’ll learn that, if you haven’t already.”

I wasn’t sure how to respond to that.

“I was livid when I learned of your agreement.” He took another deep breath. “I wasn’t planning on telling you this until I got my point across, but something tells me I’ve succeeded in doing so.” He gently kissed me. “I didn’t learn about your profile because I’m a client. I’ve never been a client.”

My eyes narrowed. “W-What do you mean?”

He sighed. “Demetri Enterprises is heavily invested in Infidelity. I hate the company. I’m constantly concerned about its ability to stay covert. Deloris monitors it, making sure all their systems are hack-proof.”

“So you didn’t?” I shot up from his lap. “You didn’t sign my agreement. You didn’t buy it?”

Nox shook his head.

“B-But I received my first check.”

“I said I’m an ass. I just kept thinking if you would’ve gone into the system, the people or person… I couldn’t…” He stood and seized my shoulders. “Agreement or not, you’re mine. You were mine from the first time I saw you in Del Mar. I just needed you to see that.”

“So you lied to me? All this talk of honesty and trust and
you
lied?”

“Not really.”

“What the hell do you mean
not really
?”

“I paid to buy out your contract.”

My stomach twisted. “You did what?”

“Demetri Enterprises is an investor. Infidelity isn’t my company. I couldn’t just pull you from the system. Your signing the agreement meant that the company—all the investors—expected a certain level of return on their investment. On you. I gave them that. I bought out your year. Your name is gone from their records. I bought your freedom.”