Cure for the Common Universe (28 page)

Oh my God. Was Gravity going to kiss me? Her face was so close. I was ready.

“I've got a crazy idea,”
she whispered.

“What?” I said.

“You know how that giant said no escaping?”

“Uh, yeah.”

“Well, what if we
did
?”

I could barely make out her expression in the starlight. I couldn't tell if she was being sarcastic.

“Seriously?”

“Seriously.” She looked toward the road. “They like to make us believe we're in the middle of nowhere, but we could easily walk back to the highway and hitchhike out of here. Whaddayathink?”

My stomach flipped while my heart swelled.

The good thing about video games with multiple endings is that you can always save in the last hour and go back to replay it differently, to see how things turn out when you make different choices. Not so with real life.

Should I stick with the guild or make a romantic midnight escape?

Gravity was beautiful and laughed at my jokes and played video games and actually wanted to go on a date with me.

Then there was my guild: Meeki, who tore me to shreds. Aurora, who had rejected me. Fezzik, who wouldn't defend me when I really needed him. Soup, whom I had made run away . . . but only because he'd been acting like a little shit. Zxzord, that asshole, who had told Meeki I'd kissed Aurora
and
who had flirted with Gravity.

“Yeah, let's get the fuck out of here,” I said.

“Yesssssssssssss!”
Gravity said, shaking my arm.

Once we were gone, I'd never have to deal with the Fury Burds again. And they'd never have to deal with me.

We crept back up the dune. Once we reached the top, Gravity stopped us again.

“Wait,” she said. “I just got a better idea.”

W
e snuck away under sparkling twilight and ran down the dune back to Video Horizons. We crept past Command, who was pacing the building's perimeter, slipped through the open door, and tiptoed down the dark, green corridor.

I followed Gravity to G-man's office. She opened the desk drawer and rustled through it. “Sweeeeeet.” She jangled a set of keys.

“Wait,” I said. “Are we—”

“Stealing a car? Yep!”

“O”—I swallowed my terror—“kay!”

She sifted through another drawer. “Aha!” She held up a twenty and then ran down the staircase.

I waited for my heart to catch up. “Cool,” I said. “Awesome. This is awesome.” I took a deep breath, and then followed. Gravity didn't so much as flinch at Conquer's squeaking
shoes echoing down the hallway, as if we couldn't possibly be caught. She made me feel kinda invincible.

We passed the Hub.

We passed the Feed.

We passed the grate where Soup and I had discovered the side quest.

We stepped out into the parking lot with the Oldsmobile that had brought me and Zxzord four days earlier. Beside it was a brown Acura.

“Get in!” Gravity said, unlocking the door and hopping into the driver's seat.

I climbed into the passenger seat and pinched my hands between my knees to keep them from trembling. The stale coffee smell didn't help my anxiety.

“This is so
exciting
,” Gravity said, sliding the keys into the ignition.

“Yes,” I said, trying to feel as electric as she was. “It is.”

“Ugh, cheapo is almost out of gas,” she said, reading the meter.

“Well, he probably didn't know we were gonna steal it,” I said.

Gravity gave me a cold look, and I tried to pretend like it had been a joke.

“Ha-ha,” I said.

“Oop!” Gravity ducked, and pulled me down by my sleeve just as I caught a glimpse of Command stepping into the light of the parking lot. His shadow passed across the speckled dust of the windshield. The parking brake jabbed into my ribs.
I'm
cool,
I thought.
I'm cool. I am a . . . cool guy who does cool things like steal cars.

Gravity peeked over the steering wheel. “Clear!”

She sat up and turned the ignition, and I tried not to panic as the engine struggled to life.

It finally turned over, and something awoke in me.

Adventure . . .

Maybe.

She put the car into gear and lightly accelerated out of the parking lot.

“Where are we going?” I asked, checking the side mirror for any sign of Command.

“We can crash at my aunt's,” Gravity said, eyes on the road. “She's the best. She'll let us stay in her guest room for a while.”

Guest
room
. Singular. The thought calmed my anxiety.

Once we got onto the open road, Gravity stepped on the gas, rocketing us through the night, and sang in a spot-on Amy Winehouse impression.
“They tried to make us go to V-hab, but we said, NO, NO, NO.”

“Ha-ha,” I said.

She swiveled the steering wheel, and we wiggled all over the road. I tried to rub the feeling back into my legs as I glanced out the back window, fully expecting to see swirling red-and-blue lights.

Gravity honked the horn, and I nearly jumped out of my skin.

“Maybe we shouldn't do that,” I said. “Ha-ha.”

“Do you think this is the car that hit G-man?” she asked.

“What?” I said.

“You don't know?” she said, wide-eyed. “G-man's the dad who got run over by his son after he took his copy of
Halo
away. That's why he started a facility for e-tards.”

Headlines flashed through my head. Moments of G-man adjusting his hip or discouraging violence in our activities or getting teary-eyed when talking about trying to improve the lives of players . . .

The images vanished as two cars came down the opposite side of the road. Oh shit. Oh shit, oh shit, oh shit. I knew it. They were cop cars. I almost had a heart attack as they passed us.

“Calm down, dude,” Gravity said, noticing my tension. “They're going to look for that missing kid.” She swiveled the steering wheel some more. “Do you think this is the car, though? Oh my God, that would be hilarious.”

“Ha-ha. Would it?”

She clicked buttons on her door, and both of our windows rolled down. Wind whipped my hair.

What was this life I was beginning? A stolen car. The smell of desert night air. A beautiful girl in the driver's seat. Everything was so alien. At least with Video Horizons, there were rules and guards and my dad knew exactly where I was. Now I truly was falling through the world. Which was great. Right? What did I have waiting for me at home besides a pissed-off dad, an exercise-obsessed stepmom, and an empty computer desk?

This was great.

We sailed through the night down the open highway.

“Farewell, e-tards!” Gravity called out the window.

Good-bye, Zxzord,
I thought.
Good-bye, Meeki. Good-bye, G-man. Good-bye, Soup. Good-bye, Silver Lady. Good-bye, Fezzik. Good-bye, Aurora.

Good riddance.

•  •  •

A fingernail ran up my arm.

“Wakey-wakey, hands off snakey,”
Gravity sang.

The rushing road started to slow. I rubbed my eyes and squinted at thousands of colorful lights filling the sky. The car stopped and the engine cut.

“Where are we?” I said, yawning.

“Heaven,” Gravity said. “Just kidding. We're at a casino.” She got out of the car.

I opened my door and stepped into a dusty parking lot. Towering above us was a giant cowgirl creakily kicking her neon boot. We were in the small gambling town Command and Conquer had driven me through on the way to Video Horizons. The night air was dry and cold. The stars were barely visible behind the casino lights. I felt lost.

Gravity looked bored or annoyed or something.

“Hey,” I said. “How about that hug?”

“Huh?”

“Oh, uh, at the car wash you said we could hug maybe.”

“Um, okay, sure,” Gravity said. She threw her arms around my neck and squeezed. There was a brief moment of her
softness against my softness, but then she let go and skipped toward the kicking cowgirl. “Come on!”

“Where are we going?” I asked, stumbling after her.

She flapped G-man's twenty back at me. “I'm gonna double this.”

“Gambling?” I said.

I wanted to ask if maybe possibly we needed that twenty for gas money. But I also only wanted to be awesome and hilarious on what seemed to be my first date.

“Don't worry,” Gravity called back. “I'm real good.”

I knew enough about gambling to know being “real good” didn't matter. It didn't work like video games, based on skill level.

“What if you lose it all?”

She spun around and walked backward, giving me that delightful Gravity grin. “I won't.”

“Oh, okay. Good.” I jogged and caught up to her. “Um, don't you have to be twenty-one to gamble?”

She twirled forward and skipped away from me. “They only ID you if you win a whole bunch of money.”

“Isn't that . . . kind of the idea?” I asked.

But she was already through the casino's automatic doors, my voice drowned out by the dings and whoops of a thousand slot machines.

•  •  •

I found Gravity sitting at a blackjack table, feet giddily tapping the little stool. She already had gambling chips in front of her.
I felt queasy. I ignored it. I'd been waiting for this moment for four days. I had beat V-hab and left all of those losers behind. This was going to be awesome.

The card dealer had a shimmery vest. I tried to look casual as I took the stool next to Gravity.

“This is exciting,” I said, rubbing my hands together. “I've never actually—”

“Don't sit next to me,”
she whispered. “
You have a baby face. Might give away the game.”

“Oh, yeah. Okay.” I got up and stood behind her.

I had a baby face? Was that a good thing or a bad thing?

Gravity slid a red chip across the green felt into a yellow rectangle. Her hair smelled so good. Her neck looked so pretty. I really wanted to put my hand on her shoulder. But I wasn't sure if that was part of the “game” or not. I really wasn't sure about anything except that I was happy to finally be on my date. It wasn't Mandrake's, but it was still pretty romantic . . . if I ignored the smell of cigarettes and squinted until the nauseating twirly lights were all a blur.

The dealer dealt two cards to each player. Gravity made a little cave with her hand and peeked at her cards. I tried to see but couldn't. She tapped the table. The dealer dealt her a card, faceup. A queen. Gravity looked at me and smiled.

“Yay!” I said, guessing a queen was a good thing. I squeezed her shoulder, then immediately let go.

I have to admit, I was surprised by Gravity's skill. I watched her
quadruple
her money, schooling the blackjack table while
sipping three free Long Island iced teas, which the waitress did not ID her for.

“Maybe we should stop now?” I said.

“How about I stop . . . ,” Gravity said as she pushed all her chips forward, “
now
?”

She won again.

“Yay,” I said.

Yep, I was surprised by Gravity's skill. Almost as surprised as she was when all her chips were gone ten minutes later.

She downed the last of her fourth Long Island, and then I helped her stumble to a chair beneath a giant blue screen with big yellow numbers. Nearby, elderly people fished quarters out of plastic buckets and plunked them into whirling slot machines.

Lights swam across Gravity's eyes. “
Pretty
.”

“Yes,” I said. “It is.” I nodded approvingly at the hideous carpet, warbled dings, and dehydrated elderly smokers. “So, um . . . why don't you tell me about yourself? Uh, what do you like to do when you're not at video game rehab? Ha.”

“Drink,” she said.

“I see that,” I said. “Anything else?”

She gave an exaggerated shrug. “Sure!”

“O . . . kay.”

It was hard keeping a girl entertained on a date. She wasn't laughing at anything I said like she had at the car wash. Was this how she really was? Or was it just the alcohol? I'd never so much as sipped a beer, so I wasn't sure how to tell.

“It's so funny that we both got committed to V-hab,” I said. “Not in, like, a universe way or anything.”

Gravity didn't respond. Her head rocked slowly back and forth as if she could hear music that I could not. Oh God, what if she was realizing that I was as pathetic as Meeki and everyone at my high school thought I was? The longer Gravity didn't laugh, the more my shoulders tensed.

“Oh, right, um,” I said. “Earlier in the Hub you were going to tell me why your parents sent you to Video Horizons.”

She rubbed her face, then let her arms flop into her lap. “Remember how I don't have a phone?”

“Yeah!” I said. “I thought you were a Luddite! Ha-ha.”

“My parents took it away because I maxed out my mom's credit card playing
Candy Crush
.” She threw her arms wide. “Whoopsy!”

“Yeah,” I said. “Whoopsy.”

My smile faded. My cheeks were sore from holding it so long. Not only was
Candy Crush
Casey's favorite game, but my dad would have
murdered
me if I'd used his credit card without asking. Also, didn't paying to win make gaming completely pointless?

Gravity tugged my collar down so hard, I thought she was going to rip it. “I. Want. Coooooofffffffeeeeeeeeeeee. Will you buy me Starbucks?” She kissed my cheek. “Please?” Kiss. “Please?” Kiss. “Please?”

I touched my cheek and took a moment to let those kisses sink in.

“Uh, I can't. We don't have any money. Remember?”