“Why didn’t you run into the bathroom like Maddy?”
The answer in my head wouldn’t make him happy so I didn’t say it. Cooper glanced around and flipped off a honking car. When his gaze returned to me, he let out a long sigh.
“Let’s go eat.”
“I want to go home,” I whispered, terrified of his reaction.
“Why?” he muttered, no longer confused. He was just angry now.
“I’m scared and I want to go home.”
“Why would you be safer at home than with me? No one fucks with me and walks away from that.”
Willing myself not to cry, I looked at Cooper and he finally understood. Showing his unhappiness by saying “fuck” ten times, he glanced around like someone might help him out if he cussed enough.
“Screw this shit!” he yelled, walking back to his bike. “I don’t need to chase an uptight bitch, just so she can turn around and think I’m an ass! Fuck you, Farah!”
I cried then. In the restaurant, I had really wanted Cooper to like me and had hoped much of his roughness was for show. It wasn’t though and he was ditching me on the side of the road. Would he get me fired now?
“Get on,” he barked, revving the engine. “Unless you want to throw another fit and walk yourself home?”
Exhausted, I needed to get home. Somehow, I was certain if I reached my apartment I would feel better. He offered me the fastest way to salvation so I climbed on behind him and wrapped my arms around his waist.
When I leaned into him, Cooper sighed in a weird way. Was he remembering how we teased each other when my arms were last wrapped around him? Was he wishing we could go back and change courses? I wished that too, even if I knew I’d still end up terrified while he hated me.
Crying the whole way home, I felt like the old Farah’s bad luck had infected the new Farah’s life. I still couldn’t seem to find my way. I wished for the billionth time that Tawny was there with me. I would have someone to talk to. Someone who loved me. Someone I didn’t have to pretend with. Someone who knew my dirty secrets.
When I got off the bike at my place, Cooper took my hand and stared at me. “I could pick you up later and take you out to dinner. Somewhere nice.”
I wanted Cooper so badly. When he looked at me, I felt beautiful and special. I had never felt that way before and I craved it. Even unaccustomed to feeling special, I was familiar with fear. I desperately needed a life where I didn’t worry constantly about my safety. With Cooper, I would always be one step away from danger or embarrassment though.
“I’ll see you Monday in class,” I said, sliding my hand slowly out of his.
Cooper’s expression changed. For a painful moment, I saw regret and longing. For a painful moment, I saw the man I wished him to be. Then, his expression hardened and he exhaled loudly.
“One day, you’ll be old and look back at how you pissed away fun shit. You’ll wish you took chances when you were young. You’ll be full of fucking regrets, but I won’t.”
Even as I nodded, I saw regret lurking behind his anger. He wished things had gone differently. He might have even wished to take me somewhere besides the bar. What Cooper hoped would show a sign of his genuine interest in me had turned into a clusterfuck.
“I had fun,” I mumbled.
Rolling his eyes, Cooper shoved a wad of twenties into my hand. “Bullshit.”
“No, some parts were really good.”
Cooper held my gaze and the longing shoved aside the irritation. “I know a nice place we could have dinner. Quiet and the food is really good.”
I think he knew how much I wanted to say yes, but I shook my head and stepped back. Cooper was beautiful and amazing in many ways, but he scared me and I needed to be safe. With him, I never would be.
Arriving at class before most students including Cooper, I found a seat in the front. I licked my lips and prayed there wasn’t toothpaste in the corners. Just as I thought to run to the bathroom to check, Cooper appeared at the door. Clean shaven and wearing a white tee, he looked younger and softer than I remembered. He looked almost harmless, yet his dark eyes and tattoos reminded me how behind his beauty lived a raging beast who thought I was a bitch.
Cooper strutted to the seat next to mine, sat down, and pulled out a notepad. I smiled at him, but kept casual. Scribbling down the lesson on the board, I tried not to make a big deal out of Cooper joining me. Before I could speak, he leaned over and kissed my neck as if Sunday never happened and we were dating now.
“Want to copy my stellar notes?” Cooper asked, scooting his desk closer.
Glancing at his notes, I shrugged. “You do have very nice penmanship. Dainty even.”
“Bitch.”
“Jackass.”
“Gorgeous.”
“Stud.”
“You have no idea.”
Rolling my eyes, I noticed Nick and his friend enter. I smiled at the guys then glanced back at Cooper who watched them as if he was a lion about to snag baby gazelles.
“Do you want to sit with your boyfriend?” Cooper asked with his gaze on Nick even as his fingers caressed the nape of my neck.
“Maybe, but first I’ll copy your stellar notes.”
“Bitch.”
“Asscrack.”
“Nerd.”
“Hotstuff.”
“The devil disguised as an angel to trick me into losing my heart.”
“That one was too long.”
Cooper grinned. “Want to get something to eat after class?”
“I have to study then go to work.”
“Blow off work and study with me then I can show you my stud moves,” he said, wiggling his brows at me.
“I need my job.”
“Not really.”
“How do you know?”
“I know everything.”
Rolling my eyes again, I wished the instructor would arrive. Instead, I was stuck with Cooper who focused more on Nick than anything else.
“I barely know him,” I said.
“Good.”
“I don’t like possessive guys.”
“Of course you do. After all, you like me and I’m possessive. If that guy touches you, I’m breaking his fingers.”
“You’re being a dick.”
Cooper sighed loudly then shoved back into his chair, nearly snapping off the seat. “If you want the douche so bad, go sit over by him,” he muttered, shoving my chair towards Nick.
“Fine,” I said, embarrassed as I grabbed my backpack.
“No, not fine. Sit.”
“You just said.”
“Sit,” he growled, glaring at me. “I will kick his ass if you sit by him.”
“But you said,” I pushed, just to annoy him since he was annoying me.
Expression shifting into horny stud, he tugged at the seam of my shirt. “I like this on you. Clingy.”
Unsure what to do, I stood another few minutes. Cooper finally convinced me to sit by patting on the chair as if I was a dog he was training.
“So where do you want to eat after class?” Cooper whispered as Manuel entered.
“I’m not eating with you. I have to study and go to work.”
“We can study together and you can call in sick.”
“I’m ignoring you now.”
Cooper spent the next forty five minutes glaring at me in the most obvious way. In fact, I was certain class ended a little early because Manuel wasn’t comfortable with Cooper’s behavior. Maybe he hoped to allow me to get away. Or maybe he knew who Cooper was and wanted to let the hotshot chase me.
Whatever the reason, class ended early and I walked out quickly. Cooper said nothing while walking next to me until I disappeared into a bathroom. When I exited, he was gone and I felt an odd mix of disappointment and relief.
Driving me home, Skye announced she met a guy named Tyler who was black and had shoulders like an ox. The ox thing made her giggle as if Tyler’s beauty had sent Skye into heat.
As we arrived at my apartment complex, she sighed. “He’s really into math. My dad is into math. A guy who is like my dad except super hot and with lips I could stare at forever. Tyler’s perfect, but I think he’s still into his old girlfriend at home.”
“Give it time,” I said, unsure about my advice skills. “It’s our second week at school. Soon, he’ll forget about her and only see you.”
When Skye studied me, I knew my advice sucked. I had no experience giving dating suggestions and it showed. Then, Skye’s brown eyes lit up and she smiled like a miracle occurred.
“Sometimes, I forget you can talk,” Skye said. “Loyal and quiet, plus you give great advice. This year is turning out so perfect. First, a super awesome friend. Now, a super hot guy. College rocks.”
Pleased with Skye’s happiness, I said goodbye then hurried inside to study. A bag of chips later and only a part of my Spanish assignment complete, I rushed around to get in a shower before work.
Once at Denny’s, I found quiet moments to work on assigned reading. I even hid in the bathroom, reading when I was supposed to be on the floor. Piper immediately mentioned my absence so I claimed diarrhea. Arnie told me about his last stomach bug and let it go. Knowing I was lying, Piper just grinned at seeing the goody-two-shoes slack off at work.
By the time Cooper arrived for his dinner, I was depressed and ready to call Tawny. I needed the friendly voice of someone who knew the real me.
“You pitching a fit about today?” Cooper asked, frowning up at me from his booth.
“What part of today? How you threatened Nick or when you embarrassed me?”
“He’s really special to you, isn’t he?” Cooper muttered full of hate.
“I’ve spoke to him twice and both times about school. I did more flirting with you the first night you came in than I’ve done with him, but fuck you.”
Eyes widening, Cooper grinned. “Someone’s in a shit mood.”
“Do you know what you want?”
“You bent over the table would be a nice start.” Staring at him, I didn’t know how my face reacted, but his cocky swagger faded. “Fuck,” Cooper grumbled under his breath. “How do you tie me in knots with a look? Is it witch magic or some shit?”
“If I was a witch, I’d figure out a way to get my schoolwork done, work, and sleep all in a twenty four hour period.”
“Ditch work one night and catch up.”
Frowning at him, I shook my head. “You really don’t understand what it’s like to be poor.”
“How poor are we talking about? You don’t look trailer trash, missing teeth, meth head level of poor. I’d peg you at working poor.”
“It doesn’t matter. What would you like and don’t say anything gross please.”
“I want you to go out with me again.”
“Only as friends.”
Cooper rolled his eyes and leaned back in the booth. “I’m not friends with girls. Why would I be?”
“So we’re only good for sex?”
Cooper grinned. “When you say the word sex, your lips look so hot and I get a little horny.”
“You can’t stop yourself from being nasty, can you?”
“I haven’t had sex in a week,” he said, tugging at his sleeve just over the eagle tattoo. “It makes me weird and horny. Have I mentioned I’m horny, Farah?”
“You’ve hinted, yes.”
Cooper’s grin widened. “Let’s go somewhere nice. No fighting, I promise.”
“I don’t want to date anyone. I wouldn’t mind being your friend, but you don’t have friends who are girls.”
“Why my friend?”
“Why not?”
“Do you have a lot of male friends? Like Nick?” Cooper asked, hissing Nick’s name like the guy was pure evil.
“No, but I like you.”
“Then, go out to dinner with me,” he muttered.
“I already said I don’t want to date and you think girls aren’t good enough to be your friends.”
“I have nothing in common with most girls. What are we going to talk about? Bikes? Fights we’ve been in. Fucking chicks?” Cooper paused then snapped his fingers. “Hey, I do know this bull-dyke chick and we bullshit about that stuff. She’s cool, so maybe I can only be friend with lesbos?”
“Then, I guess you and I can’t be friends.”
“Because you’re hot for some other guy?”
“Why are you obsessed with Nick?”
“For the same reason you are.”
“I’m not obsessed with him.”
“I see the way you look at him. All wide-eyed horny schoolgirl. He’s a loser and smells like cheap cologne. If that’s what you’re into, I can buy new cologne. I can also take you on discount dates and expect you to pay because I’m too poor to take care of my woman. Is that what you’re looking for?”
Cooper was such an asshole. Whining like a spoiled little boy told he couldn’t have a new bike from Santa, he figured he was right about everything. Never would he allow logic or sweet talk to change his mind. Something about his tone though caused me to laugh. Once I started, I couldn’t stop.
“What?” he muttered.
“Hasn’t a girl told you no before? Is that why you’re acting like a nutball?”
“Nutball? That’s insensitive, you bitch,” he said, grinning. “And for your information, plenty of girls tell me no.”