Dance of Ashes and Smoke (Age of Monsters Book 1) (13 page)

W
e left our motorcycles hidden in an abandoned warehouse at the edge of the city, arranging old moldy boxes around them and our stuff, hoping and praying no one or nothing found it. Our weapons and most important possessions were strapped to us in case we had to abandon everything.

In case we had to run.

There were no words between us as we slunk farther into the city, kept to the shadows, staying against the sides of structures, ears perked for any unnatural sound. Wind whistled between the buildings and sent trash dancing through the streets and my pulse into overdrive with each scrape and flutter. Adrenaline was a strong force pumping its way through my body, magnifying my senses almost too much. It made everything louder, brighter, smellier.

With each step the stench grew worse, a rotten fish corpse type of smell mixed with old socks. Olivia gagged and moved her scarf to cover the lower half of her face. I copied her good idea, but the stink had crawled into my nose and attached itself inside like a parasite. Jackson blew breath out of his nose, making a weird horsey sound.

This place used to be vibrant and brim with life and sounds and laughter and love. Now it was a barren wasteland haunted with the ghosts of the dead, echoes of their lives still imprinted along the streets, making it even more depressing. Bits of clothes, the random toy, ripped and damp books, crushed DVDs, shredded photos. It made a strange graveyard, a sort of memorial to the lives that used to flourish here.

The uprising of the humans had been so strong in Savannah, the monsters hadn’t bothered turning it into a camp. Instead, they killed everyone. Just like our hometown.

I memorized everything, let it soak deep into my soul, more ammo for my grievance against the monsters. The hatred I nurtured like a newborn lion, feeding and training it to come bursting out of me fierce and proud.

Once I was ready.

Once I went back for her.

Once I had killed her. And her little creepy chimera familiar.

The screams of the dying still rang in my ears, a constant din at the back of my mind.

By the time Olivia and I made it to the town square, the sorceress and her chimera were finished and dematerialized right in front of us. The other monsters wandered away to find more fun sources of violence.

The piles of dead bodies we sorted through, searching desperately for our families, were stamped into my brain, playing through my dreams like a horror film every night for months. My mom, my dad, Liv’s parents right beside them. Tangled in one another’s arms as they tried to protect each other from death. Alcott had dragged me away from them, holding me while I shook with shock.

And now he was gone too.

I fought to keep my face expressionless, actually a little glad of the bandage helping to hide my tortured emotions. Adele had been through more than enough. I already looked bad enough and didn’t want to scare the kid with horrific emotions decorating my mangled face.

We reached the mall with no problems, slipping in a sporting goods store, and loaded up from still quite stocked shelves of ammo. We had enough weapons, but the bullets and arrows were a welcome addition to our arsenal. We grabbed new sleeping bags too, the ones we had were pretty rank after being hidden in the vent for so long. And every battery we could hold was shoved into each pocket and crevice we could make fit.

Olivia dragged us towards the door. “Come on. You said we could go to Hot Topic.”

I pulled out of her grasp, forcing a laugh past my aching face, not wanting to waste time shopping. “All right. All right. But let’s be fast. I don’t like the feel of this part of the city.”

Her head bobbed. “Too many ghosts. But I still want a couple new tees. What’s the point of the apocalypse if I can’t have free stuff?”

I appreciated her attempt at distraction and played along. “It’s the one real perk.” I stroked the butt of my gun with fond fingers.

“Not exactly what I meant, but whatever.”

“I’d like to make a quick trip to a drugstore. Herbs are harder to come by with the winter upon us,” Jax took Adele’s hand.

“Good idea.”

Surprise stained Jackson’s face at my quick agreement, his thanks a question.

“I’m not stupid. I know stocking up on medicine and bandages is a good idea. I’d prefer stronger pain meds.” Not liking the strut in his walk, I add a slight jab. “Besides, I want you to feel useful now that you’re here. And it’s pretty much all you’re good for.”

He shot me a wacky grin, completely unoffended. He’d been impossible to get a rise out of. But I’d keep trying.

Olivia hissed in my ear. “Are you not going to be happy until he’s as miserable as you are?”

“Nope.”

She shook her head, but was distracted at the sight of Hot Topic and too busy sorting through the racks to keep bugging me about him.

I ran my hands over nerd gear, missing the shows I used to love, the bands I used to dance to. I was unable to resist pocketing a pair of
Harry Potter
socks. I didn’t have many in my pack, so it wasn’t a waste of space. I also grabbed Adele a couple pair of
Star Wars
socks and an adorable unicorn necklace. Her eyes lit up when I showed them to her and tucked them into her pack.

My eye caught the bookstore across the hall and my heart literally ached with longing. I wanted nothing more than to lose myself in there for days or even move in and never leave, but I was already carrying as many books as I could, sacrificing room for more practical items, but unable to leave certain favorites behind.

Liv appeared beside me, arms toppling with a pile of shirts. “We can go in if you want. You can always get a small mass market sized one that would fit in your jacket pocket. Just so you can have something new to read on guard shift.”

“No, we need to go. Besides, we’re planning on spending our time in the library. There will be plenty there to choose from.”

Our arms were full with our new things and the almost empty bags we’d brought weighed heavy on our backs as we emerged into the waning light of the day. We’d spent way too much time in the mall.

M
y breath caught at the beauty of the library. Live oak trees dripping with Spanish moss framed the huge white historic structure with majestic columns holding up the roof. Before all this, I would’ve loved to explore the city, still gorgeous even though it looked like the zombie apocalypse ravaged it.

I couldn’t believe it still stood.

My eyes closed to slits to read the words etched on the top of the building. “This eternal court is open to you with its society wide as the world. The chosen and the mighty of every place and time.”

Olivia and I hurried past the black iron gated ramps and up the stone steps, weapons readied, Jax and Adele behind us. The door was heavy and opened with a whoosh, stale air smacking us in our faces. No one had been here in ages. We went through the endless stacks and aisles and offices, clearing the building.

Relieved we found no rotten corpses or monsters ready to jump out at us, we locked the doors and sealed ourselves in, setting alarms and traps for anyone who found their way inside.

Exhausted from the ride and the returned throbbing pain in my face, I curled up in one of the green chairs set up in a circle, inspecting my scarred hands, wrapped in self-pity. My face would match my hands once it healed. Even if we won the world back, no one wanted a dancer with a ravaged face. I still hadn’t mustered up the courage to look in a mirror, not ready to see how hideous I was.

Jax crouched next to me. “I should really check your injury. It needs a fresh bandage.” His timing was creepy.

I blew out a breath, determined to stop being a coward. “Let me use the bathroom first.”

His eyes seared holes into my back as I walked away to hide in the ladies room for a moment. I kept my head down, avoiding the mirrors until I’d relieved myself. I stared at the sink as I pumped sanitizer into my hands, building my backbone from scratch.

With a growl, I raised my head and faced the mirror.

And burst into tears.

My hair was snarled and dull, the golden highlights gone, leaving it a muddy brown. Half of my face covered in gauze and the other half smeared with filth. Even the vodka hadn’t been strong enough to wash it away. Eyes gaunt and shadowed, skin sallow, cheekbones sharp and protruding. I looked like a walking skeleton with skin stretched across it—and what was under the bandage was probably much worse. Still crying, I peeled away the tape holding the gauze to my face. It was so bad, the tears stopped.

Lines of oozing crimson shredded my cheek from the edge of my brow to the corner of my lips, leaving the skin marred and puckered. Blood painted the side of my face, dribbling down my neck to pool in the hollow of my collarbone.

A scream built up inside me even as I scolded myself for being shallow. I didn’t need to be hot to hunt monsters. And dancing was never going to happen again anyway. I had to stop being stupid. I was still alive and able to fight. Olivia was alive.

Jackson was alive.

Even if he’d never want me now.

I banished that line of thought. I refused to be that person. I would not let my defenses down, scars or not. I couldn’t chance it; there were more important things to worry about.

And my face wasn’t going to get in the way of my mission.

I wouldn’t let it.

Surprised they were still there, I grabbed a couple paper towels and mopped up most of the blood. Jax could deal with the rest.

When I finally emerged from the bathroom, they’d set up a nice little space for us. Our sleeping bags and blankets and pillows were in a pile similar to the one I’d created for Star Wars. Liv had already gathered several piles of books for us to go through like we were the scoobies from Buffy.

Except I was no slayer with supernatural strength.

At least I hadn’t lost an eye like Xander.

Yet.

Jackson sat in the middle of everything and beckoned me over. “It looks better today.”

“It looked worse yesterday?”

He nodded. “Much.”

I shuddered at the thought and sat down with crossed legs in front of him. “Do your thing.”

“Close your eyes.” His voice whispered across my skin.

I obeyed, trying not to flinch or shriek as he pressed flames against my face.

“Sorry. I don’t want it getting infected, so we have to keep it clean.”

“I want to know where you keep your never ending supply of vodka.”

“I keep it hidden from you so you don’t drink it all.”

I laughed and then whimpered when the movement yanked at my wounds.

“Sorry.”

I’d have scowled if it hadn’t hurt so damn much. “Stop apologizing.”

“Sorry. Yes, ma’am.”

“And stop being funny.”

“Of course.”

Something soothing and cool spread across my cheek, soaking up the pain.

“You should probably have stitches. Even though it’s better today, it isn’t closing up how I’d prefer. I’ll try this for now and check it tonight. If it hasn’t improved, I’m going to have to stitch you up.” He paused. “Either way, I’m afraid you’re going to have scars.”

“I sorta figured, considering what a mess she made of my face.” My words came out warbled, the medicine effecting part of my mouth.

“Right.” He smooths on the gauze and tapes it up. “You’re all done.”

I opened my eyes, startled by how close he was. I twitched my head so my hair fell as a curtain between us.

He slipped a hand under the curtain and moved it back, cupping my neck. “Don’t hide. Not from me.”

Staring at him, I searched his eyes and face for any hint of disgust or distaste or pity. But I only found sympathy and a slow boiling rage and something else. Something deep and hidden and hard to read. Something a place inside me recognized and rejoiced over.

He licked his lips, and I followed the movement with my eyes, my chest tightening. His scent billowed around me, making me dizzy. Pine and herbs and sunlight. How did he always smell like the sunlit sky?

I leaned a centimeter closer, trapped inside a spell I wasn’t sure I wanted to break. He read words written on my soul, able to see past the barriers I kept, past the defenses, past the guards.

And he didn’t turn away.

Why didn’t he turn away from the ugliness and hatred and snarls of grief?

Especially when his soul shined so bright and golden, swirling with the colors of dawn, a beacon still holding onto hope.

The moment between us stretched out in eternity, tendrils of songs whirled in my mind, a soft soundtrack playing in the background. I couldn’t breathe. Or blink.

Adele plopped into my lap, the spell shattered around us in glinting, broken fragments.

Grateful, I buried the good side of my face in her neck, staying hidden until I calmed. When I finally braved meeting Jackson’s eyes, they were shuttered, allowing no one inside. I shivered, certain I’d imagined everything. There was no way he wanted to kiss me. Especially now. We were way too different and romance in the middle of a monster apocalypse was a stupid idea.