Authors: Rosalind Brett
By now, Annette and Vic had come down the steps and were welcoming Roger Payn. Vic laughed and slapped his shoulder, told him to come up and have a drink; he was just in time for dinner.
Terry used the respite to look at the young man who had stayed in her mind for many months in England. He was almost too good-looking; his hair, fair and wavy, drooped engagingly over one temple, and his eyes in the light were a clear amber. His khaki drill suit was travel-stained, but somehow he looked more like someone who had been out for a day
’
s fishing than a man who had flown backwards and forwards in a frantic search for a girl.
Over a drink, while he gazed at Terry, he told them all about it.
“
I left the bus at Khota Mipis and took a plane south. I was stuck there in some benighted spot for a whole day, but managed to leave by train next morning for Shalak. There I couldn
’
t find out a thing, except that Terry had booked one day to go on a steamer. They told me she could easily have come back on the same steamer and gone out to the coast. So I got another train and might have been stuck at the coast for ever, but a pilot flying a private plane said he would take me north, if I didn
’
t mind stopping at a few places on the way. I got him to follow the river, but it was all forest—nowhere to land. Eventually we did land and I made some more enquiries. Well
-
meaning people advised me to come back here before setting out on further travels.
”
He was still staring at Terry and shaking his head as he added,
“
I
’
ve been well punished for not meeting you at the ship. Till Pryce heard about his wife
’
s accident we all thought you two would stay together all the way to Penghu, and as I
’
d just had word from my father that the branch here would have to be wound up if it didn
’
t show an improved turnover, I thought I
’
d better stick to the job!
”
“
I
’
m so very sorry,
”
she said, a little jerkily.
“
I was perfectly safe.
”
Annette, lounging back in her chair with another drink, lifted an eyebrow at him.
“
Wait till you hear
everything,
old boy. We
’
ve just been entertaining the he-man type who brought our Terry all the way from Vinan by canoe!
”
“
Oh, please,
”
begged Terry.
“
Roger would probably like to clean up a bit before dinner.
”
“
Now that I
’
m here,
”
he said,
“
and
you
’
re
here, I can wait for all the rest. Terry ... you can
’
t guess how I feel now.
”
“
You can tell her all about it later on,
”
Annette promised him with a wink.
“
Without an audience.
”
He laughed and stood up, a rather slightly built young man whose movements were almost graceful. Terry avoided his lingering glance, but watched him as he went through the doorway into the corridor. It was odd, but the Roger of the letters, the Roger who had taken her out a few times and inarticulately bidden her goodbye many months ago, was missing. Or perhaps her own power of assessment had altered. Whatever it was, this young man, for all his good looks and family associations with the magic Far East, had become merely another male. It was just as if, she thought hollowly, her whole sense of values had undergone a drastic and irrevocable change.
The dinner turned into a celebration. An extra course had been slipped in and Mr. Winchester opened some wines. The canoe trip was gone through and roused the correct degree of horror in Roger, and then he went into more detail about his own chase. At about eleven the Winchesters went to bed, and Annette strolled outside to see Vic on his way.
Terry, alone in the lounge with Roger, fingered an ornament and straightened a heap of magazines. She felt him coming close, and tightened up. But he was only offering a cigarette.
She took one and let him light it, blew smoke before she looked at him.
“
You must be worn out,
”
she said.
“
Beat,
”
he confessed,
“
but very happy. Great luck to be here in the same house with you; I hope you think so too.
”
Light-hearted does it, she told herself.
“
No opinion at the moment, but I
’
ll let yo
u
know, when I have one. Why is your business suddenly slack
?
”
“
It
’
s not sudden. Before I came we had a Chinese manager who wasn
’
t too honest. My father sent me to take over because I
’
m one of the Payn family and therefore have prestige. But he expected a miracle, and I
’
m no magician.
”
“
Still, with the bridges and the projected new roads, your trade should increase, shouldn
’
t it?
”
“
That
’
s what the old man says. But I don
’
t want to be logical tonight. Let
’
s go out and star-gaze.
”
She shook her head hurriedly.
“
Annette is out there. Roger, I feel we ought to understand each other from the beginning. We
...
we
’
re quite strangers, you know.
”
“
Of course we
’
re not. Even back in England I told you that you had eyes like forget-me-nots.
”
He grinned.
“
They
’
re darker out here—do you know that? And there
’
s a little red in your hair except when you
’
re
close
to Annette. She
’
s red-gold, but you
’
re the brown of very ripe wheat. As a matter of fact, I rather go for you, Miss Fremont.
”
“
You
’
re letting your relief at getting back lead you into saying things you shouldn
’
t. Till Annette is married I shan
’
t be able to think about anything else.
”
“
That
’
s all right,
”
he said firmly.
“
So long as we
’
re normally happy together, I
’
m not impatient. Where shall we go tomorrow?
”
“
It
’
s a working day, isn
’
t it?
”
“
Our first day together? Lord, no! I
’
ll take you into
the hills.
”
She shook her head.
“
You
’
ve ignored the business for several days, through me. I
’
m not taking you away from it tomorrow.
”
He groaned.
“
Very well. For you, I
’
ll work. By the way, I
’
m trying to get Vic to have me as his best man. You
’
re the bridesmaid—would you like that
?
”
She smiled perfunctorily.
“
It
’
s up to Vic. I really must go to bed now. There
’
ll be plenty of time for talk.
”
“
But not nearly enough.
”
He sighed.
“
Terry, I haven
’
t been thinking about you the way you
’
ve thought of me. Your letters were guarded, but I knew you were modest and not keen on showing your feelings till you were sure of yourself. Trouble is, I
’
ve been sure of myself ever since I first met you.
”
“
I
’
ve told you I can
’
t think about those things yet.
”
He came close to her, smiled at her in a way which had once caught at her heart.
“
Well, shall we make a special date? A day or two after Annette
’
s wedding we
’
ll go out for a picnic and explore each other
’
s minds. Promise?
”
“
I won
’
t promise, but I
’
ll try. And, please, Roger, try to be ... just nice, till then.
”
“
Well, don
’
t sit about looking too sweet, that
’
s all. I haven
’
t even kissed another girl since we met!
”
He paused and added teasingly,
“
Have you kissed another man?
”
She lifted her chin, gave him a careful smiling glance.
“
You
’
ve no right to know, Mr. Payn. I
’
m going to bed now. Good night.
”
He moved a little closer.
“
Just like that?
”
“
Just like that—tonight and every night, for the present. Good night, again.
”
“
Good night, my pet.
”
He drew down the corners of his mouth.
“
Your welcome was cooler than I expected, but then I was ever an optimist. See you in the morning.
”
Terry nodded, and went straight from the lounge to her bedroom. There she crossed to the french window and let her nerves slacken. The air smelled earthy after the rain, but the threat of another storm seemed to have passed. The sky was thick with stars, battalions of crickets were chirping and a small breeze rustled the natural growth which was not far from the back of the house.
Why was she worrying, for heaven
’
s sake? Because Roger had come back? But she had expected him even sooner, and had been ready for his desiring a little closer relationship than she was able to give. Then
...
then was it Pete?
She rubbed her hands together, pushed one of them over her forehead. What was it about Pete that made her utterly unsure of herself? Why had she felt so unnatural with him this evening? But then, even when they had been quite alone and miles from anyone else, she had experienced
the
same tense awareness of him. It wasn
’
t just being a little ... in love with him; it was far more than that, though that was part of it.
He spent this evening with the Swedish brother and sister; would do the same tomorrow evening, and the one following. The brother was anxious to go home, but Astrid
...
Terry paused in her thoughts to examine the name. It reminded one of white flowers poking up out of the frost, a white blossom that might have a green heart or a golden one. For Pete, anyway, it would be golden.
She began to undress. This mulling over every single thing—a new habit—was ridiculous and demoralizing. It
n
ot only made one feel slightly sick all the time but it weakened one
’
s defences. Not that she really needed much in the way of defences against Pete. All he wanted was to be rid of reminders of the canoe trip from Vinan. He didn
’
t threaten her in any tangible way. Or did he
?
Terry shook her head at her reflection in the mirror. Life had never been so complex, so perhaps it was normal for her to feel helpless. There ought to be some
...
The door opened and Annette came in, looking gay and pink-cheeked. The bright hair had loosened in the breeze and stars shone in her eyes, put there perhaps by Vic
’
s kisses. But as she sank down on the side of the bed it was not of Vic she spoke first. She lay right back and said to the ceiling,
“
What an evening! How do you feel about having two men
queuing
up to see you? Though Roger forms a queue all by himself, doesn
’
t he? Was he loving?
”