Darcy and Fitzwilliam: A Tale of a Gentleman and an Officer (28 page)

After two miserable hours, Darcy had walked off his anger and was turning onto St. James Street, although still several blocks from his house. His hands were thrust deep into his pockets while his thoughts were miles away from where they had started, the anger that had propelled him into madness now completely dissipated to be replaced by a mental assessment of Elizabeth's upcoming final month. He shook his head in wonder. How in hell would they survive? His glance drifted far ahead, down the street to where their house stood, spying in the distance what appeared to be the bright light from the front foyer of their townhome. He stopped dead in his tracks.
I must have left the door open. Oh, what an idiot!
He quickened his pace.

As he came closer, he could hear panic in the raised voices coming from the vicinity of his house, the shouted commands in the still night. Apprehension began to grip at him. The figure of his butler, Winters, was recognizable on the top stair, pointing to the left as a footman went running in that direction. Then he saw another one of his footmen change direction as soon as he spotted him, and was fast approaching, waving his arms frantically.

"Mr. Darcy, come quick. It's the baby!"

"What about the baby?" Darcy bolted past the gasping footman. "Is Mrs. Darcy all right?"

"The baby is coming now, sir."

Darcy was startled at first then greatly confused, his panic intensifying. "But we have four weeks left..." By this time, another figure was out the door, off running to the right, when Winters spotted Darcy and waved to him from the threshold.

"Mr. Darcy, thank heavens you've returned, sir!" The poor old retainer was gasping for breath. Darcy had reached the gate and could see curtains from neighboring homes being pulled back and people gazing out. He pushed his way past several gentlemen who had crossed the street, curious as to what was wrong.

"We have several footmen out trying to find a doctor, sir. Please do not be alarmed."

Darcy charged up the front steps two at a time and grabbed his butler by the shoulders. "What in bloody hell do you mean? Where is Doctor Baire? Where are the other doctors? Where is the midwife? Have you not tried to find the midwife? Who is with Mrs. Darcy?"

Darcy had just walked, actually run, into his worst nightmare.

"We have at least five footmen out searching, sir." Winters's voice shook. "I am certain it won't be long." Although he was attempting to look confident, Darcy could see the fear in the old man's eyes.

"Darcy!" He heard Fitzwilliam's voice from inside and ran instinctively toward it, quickly seeing him at the doorway of the smaller ladies' parlor. He held a sleeping child in his arms.

"Who's with her?" Darcy's breathing was uneven.

"Amanda and Mrs. Winters, and her maid, I think."

Darcy was at the top of the stairs before he could finish.

***

"Stop pushing now, Elizabeth. I am going to feel your stomach again."

Darcy looked uneasily at the figure lying on the bed, nearly hidden by Mrs. Winters and the maid as they crisscrossed his view. Cara ran around to the other side of the bed, and he then saw his Lizzy being held in a half-sitting position against another maid, his wife's fingers clutching desperately at the covers beneath her. Amanda turned toward him slightly as she sat down on a stool placed between Lizzy's legs.

It was the sight of blood smeared across Amanda's apron that finally shocked Darcy back to his senses, roused him from his frozen stance in the doorway, and propelled him swiftly into the room.

"What the devil is going on here, Elizabeth?" An anxious-looking Darcy walked quickly to the side of the bed. "You are not due to deliver for another four weeks." With that futile objection voiced, he pulled the maid from behind his wife to take her place, supporting Lizzy's back. Kissing her neck and cheek, he tightened his arms around her.

"Are you all right?" he whispered into her hair. "Please be all right." He pressed his eyes closed to compose his escalating emotions and prayed that the good Lord would spare him from having a heart attack until he knew his wife was safe.

Amanda gave him a sympathetic look. "Evidently someone failed to inform the baby of the delivery date. I assure you, Mr. Darcy, your child is coming now."

"William, please calm yourself." Elizabeth could feel his pounding heart beneath her cheek. She looked up at him, tears streaming down her face. "I only thank God you are finally here. I love you, William, remember that
, whatever happens
. Please forgive me."

He did not like her words. Frightened by what they implied, he roughly kissed her mouth then pulled her firmly back against himself and closed his eyes to fight off his own stinging tears. "Nothing to forgive," he finally managed to say, his voice thick with emotion. "Love you so much, Lizzy."

"Did you know that Fitzwilliam and Amanda were coming here this evening?" When he did not respond immediately, she shook her finger at him. "You must tell me things like this, William. I haven't even prepared a room for them."

"I could not, Elizabeth." In his concern for her, he actually had forgotten about Fitzwilliam's escape, but that was something he would never admit. "Fitz swore me to secrecy. Besides, I..." He looked on in terror as her face began to contort, a sudden scream erupting from her as she stared straight at him. Her hands were clutching and tearing at the sheets. It was a mind-numbing scream. It was ear-deafening. He shook his head at the ringing in his brain.

"Elizabeth, please be sensible. He made me swear." He realized she was not angry with him, only in the midst of a labor pain, when she squeezed his hands until his fingers nearly popped like little balloons. He tried not to flinch until she relaxed her hold.

"Is everything all right?" he asked Amanda, dreading the response. "Is this normal?"

"Everything appears to be fine, Mr. Darcy. Although she has had a rather rough time of it, she is a strong and brave young woman. I am very proud to call her Cousin. All right, now push again, Elizabeth; we shall soon see the crown hopefully."

Lizzy began crying and laughing, eager that the end might be within sight. She weakly pressed her head against Darcy's chest. "Amanda and I have progressed to using our Christian names. We feel we are quite well acquainted by now." She inhaled raggedly. "Well, here we go again." She began once more to push and cry and grunt and swear with pain.

***

"Are the pains always so tremendous? I thought they would build up gradually. Perhaps there is something more happening here since the child is coming so early." It was less than a quarter hour later, and Darcy was shocked by Lizzy's grueling labor.

"Actually, the child appears to be full term, so do not be concerned with that. Unfortunately, I think your wife has been having pains for longer than you know. Since they were in her back, she failed to identify them as her labor." Amanda turned to the side table for a towel, certain the birth was only moments away.

Elizabeth suddenly screamed in pain and clutched at his arms, gripped with panic. Something was wrong, very wrong, the pressure on her back excruciating. She began writhing in agony, these contractions far stronger than any before. "My baby, my baby," she gasped. "Oh my God, William... my baby."

"Do not push, Lizzy!" Amanda immediately felt around Elizabeth's stomach as her mind spun through all her experiences years before at her father's hospital. "The baby has stopped somehow."

"
Do something... anything... Save my baby
." Lizzy was hysterical. "
William, whatever happens to me, save our baby.
"

"What is it?!" Darcy demanded. "Please tell me what is going on!" Lizzy's cries were ripping open his heart. "Where is that damned doctor?!"

Amanda gently felt inside and realized the child was presenting face forward, the back aligned to Lizzy's back. Her father had spoken of this sometimes occurring, but she had never seen it before. During his lessons, he had explained the grave danger it presented to both mother and child. The need was to open her wider, and there was only one way Amanda knew of to do that.

"Oh, I am so stupid. All the signs have been there! Lizzy, I am sorry, but I believe we must get you into a different position." Amanda reached out her hand to grab Lizzy's arm. "Since we have no birthing chair, I think you'll have to squat or kneel."

A shocked Darcy had already motioned for the maid to take his place. He was instantly at Amanda's side and pulled her hand from Elizabeth. "Excuse me," he said in a harsh whisper, "perhaps we should wait for the doctor to arrive."

Amanda struggled to pull back her hand from his grasp. "Mr. Darcy," she whispered, "She is in agony. The child is facing forward, a very difficult and dangerous delivery, especially for a woman so small." She then spoke in a lower voice, hoping Elizabeth would not hear. "We really have few alternatives. Elizabeth is weak and may not have the strength or the will to take much more."

The anger on Darcy's face quickly dissolved into fear, the full impact of what she was saying hitting him brutally hard. Not waiting for his answer, she pulled her hand away and pushed the sheets farther back. "No! Wait! This is barbaric!" he shouted as Lizzy grabbed his arm.

"Please, William, do as she says." She was growing weaker by the moment. "Remember, if you must choose, choose the child. Please, please, promise me this." He could see the agony in her eyes.

"What do you want me to do?" he asked Amanda, his voice hoarse.

"Help me get her out of bed. Get behind her--you must support her weight as she kneels over this pillow." Not really certain of what she was doing, she grabbed one from the bed and threw it to the floor. "If that doesn't show quick results, you will have to help her walk about. Hurry, please. This should open her more--I will try what I can to turn the child."

Darcy and Mrs. Winter struggled to bring Elizabeth to the side of the bed, and then he grasped her under her arms, supporting her as she began to stoop. Amanda pulled up Lizzy's nightdress to massage her belly.

***

His heart was near breaking. How could she feel so light and look so huge, and still be so small? How could any of this end without disaster? Would she disappear in his arms like a fog, insubstantial, fragile? She had begged him to choose the child if it came to it, but how could he? She was his whole life. He would surely go insane without her, would never want to live, and it would be this damn child's fault. No, he would choose Lizzy over
it
if it came to that, without a moment's hesitation, would never allow Lizzy to die if it was within his power, even if she never spoke to him again. No. His only desire was to stop her pain by whatever means possible. He watched as Amanda knelt before his wife, her hand probing inside, and willed himself not to pass out from the tension.

"I believe it's moved a bit..." The next few minutes were an eternity as Amanda alternately rubbed and massaged Lizzy's stomach with one hand while the other felt within for any change. "It
is
moving! The baby is turning," Amanda held her breath as she made small, twisting motions with her hand.

***

"One more push, Lizzy," Amanda ordered.

"Push, darling, push," called Darcy simultaneously.

"It's coming--the head is clear." Amanda continued her probing and gentle pulling. Within another moment, the baby swished through, slimy and wet, cradled in her waiting hands.

Darcy gasped out in a choking sob, "Thank God."

An exhausted Lizzy collapsed back into his arms, and he clutched her tightly to his chest, unknowing and unseeing of the activity happening around them. She was pale, she was weak, but she was alive. Alive and, incredibly, smiling.

After cutting the cord, Amanda brought the child to a table. She ran her finger around the child's mouth, after which she began to pat its bottom, softly at first and then a good little slap. The wail that emitted from the baby was heard throughout the household. They heard it in the hallways, in every bedroom, parlor, and convenience, and it continued, down into the servant's hall. It was heard even by people walking outside. There were a full two seconds of quiet before the cheers started from below, from the basement on up throughout the house.

"Mr. Darcy, you may help Elizabeth back into the bed." Amanda's voice seemed to come from miles away as he lifted Lizzy up into his arms and placed her gently down. Her eyes blinked and then finally opened to his.

"God, I love you, Lizzy," was all he could say before he kissed her forehead. "I love you."

"Have we a son or a daughter?" she asked weakly, but Darcy did not hear nor care. She was alive.

***

"Mr. Darcy, would you like to meet your son?" Amanda had wiped the worst of the moisture from the child and had wrapped him in a soft towel.

It was a moment before her words penetrated. He was only just beginning to breathe again.
Did
he want to meet this child, this little interloper who had caused so much trouble and upheaval? Who may have nearly caused his Lizzy her life? He felt oddly indifferent about the prospect, caring only that his beloved wife lived, but there she was laughing and nodding. That is a good sign, he thought vaguely. Suddenly, memories flooded over him of his father's rage and grief being replaced by an equally ferocious love at the sight of his newborn daughter, even though Georgiana survived but not his wife.

Yes
, he thought,
perhaps I should meet this son of mine
.

***

Darcy's first breathless impression of the wriggly, warm bundle in his arms came as a complete surprise. "Oh, my God, he's beautiful. Lizzy. He's absolutely perfect." A groundswell of instantaneous love washed over him, shocking him with its force; protective adoration for the child nearly overwhelmed him. And then the boy opened his eyes. When Darcy saw his Elizabeth in those eyes, and then himself and then his mother and father, a laughing sob escaped his lips, and he brought the infuriated little face to his, kissing it tenderly, his heart overflowing with love. How could he have sacrificed this precious life, this angel? How could he ever have chosen between them? It was inconceivable to him now. "Lizzy, he's so... huge!"