Authors: Kim Knox
“You provided for that estate? For Anstice?”
The place the mages went to die. Or so she’d thought. Ava stared at Heyerdar. He
knew
? And she’d prided herself on knowing everything that went on in the city. There was a whole layer of life and politics about which she had no idea...but then mages died so infrequently. And she’d had no cause to question the source of mage-light. Only to avoid its lure.
Heyerdar’s attention moved to her. “Yet you brought her here.”
Zarand pushed himself up and away from the doorframe. “The arrangement I made was also practical. I’ve now found my own balance, the one who makes me whole, so my deal with the mages is over.”
Heyerdar pushed his hand over his face, frowning as he found it slicked with blood. “You should never have agreed to it.”
“But I did.” Zarand’s smile was sharp. “You should thank me.”
“I’m not killing you.”
His brother’s laughter was dark and warm. “Thank you.” He stepped back, his gaze turning to Ehren, who was offering a shirt to the barely conscious Reist. Zarand’s expression softened and, in that moment, Ava envied them a bond that wouldn’t be questioned. Would be allowed. “Ehren.” He said the man’s name, sure and low with want wrapped around it. The cool mist of his magic fed the word. The thief looked up and blinked. “Time to leave.”
Ehren nodded and moved towards him. The elemental cupped his large hand around Ehren’s jaw and magic seeped around his fingers to coat the thief’s skin with soft light. Their foreheads touched and Ava’s heart became a tight stone in her chest. They whispered something to each other she couldn’t catch, and with a flare of magic were gone.
She shivered. The ornate room suddenly felt lifeless, less whole...and she realized she was staring at Reist as he struggled off the bed. The thought was there to scramble to help him, and a few days before she would’ve done just that, relishing the chance to touch him...but she didn’t. Her fingers slipped over Heyerdar’s knuckles, tracing each rise and fall, memorizing the heat, the strength. Her very last chance to touch him.
Reist pulled down the silk shirt and let out a long breath. For a moment, his focus turned to the remains of Clay in the corner, gilded by mage-light. Magic flickered through his eyes, lighting their darkness, and he frowned.
“Clay had everything planned to be emperor. Wanted to claim it in the name of his insane grandfather.” Reist moved to stand in the doorway, to occupy the same space Zarand had stood. His voice twisted with something like mockery. Ava tried to slip her fingers between Heyerdar’s, but he caught her hand and stopped her. Her heart ached. She was right to end her obsession. Reist was still talking. She focused. “Wanted to set up a guild of thieves to control the city.”
The mages had already done that. It was almost ironic.
With a groan, Heyerdar pushed himself up. He moved his hand away from hers. “How the fuck could he twist your magic?”
“I don’t know. Perhaps a healed thief is the same as one who never had Words traced into their skin. Clay had access to some very...select books as curator to the emperor’s collection. He could’ve worked out that he was an untutored mage. But...” Reist let out a long sigh. “We’ll never know for sure.”
“The thieves.” Heyerdar dragged a hand over his face, pushed back his matted hair. “They killed to point us at him? Too fucking vague.”
Ava frowned. “Clay’s mother was a prostitute. Maybe under Madam Vina Ross.” The thieves under Clay’s control wanted him removed. Something the Words he’d fed into their bones prevented them from doing. “You’ll probably find other tenuous links. The best they could do.”
She turned to look at Reist. He was leaning against the thick wooden frame for support, his skin still grey. “And I’m not sorry about the way Clay died. He had so many of those magic chambers.” She shook her head, still able to taste the acrid remains of the mages. The power he’d held in that moment had rivaled Reist’s. “And what he brought those thieves here to do? What he
drove
them to do?” Her smile was sharp. “I’d eat him again. In a heartbeat.”
Reist pressed his lips together and the mask of the Highest Mage settled onto his tired features. “The thieves turned on him, Ava. Killed him.”
She frowned.
“Your position in the Institute and the palace is precarious enough without it being known that you gave in to your nature.” His expression became tight. “The thieves killed Clay and Captain Heyerdar killed them.”
Heyerdar climbed to his feet, wrapping the tatters of his clothes around his waist. “Very neat.” He wiped his hand across his jaw. “Though I believe the honor of killing them should go in part to my brother.”
“Zarand?” Reist glanced back into the shadows of the imperial suite. His mouth pulled down at the corners. Had he heard that the mages no longer had an easy supply of thieves? That they’d have to do their own hunting now? “He took one of the thieves?” He lifted his chin. “I want a full report on everything that’s happened in the past five days. Everything.”
Thoughts swirled that she would never have considered only a few short days before. Who was he protecting? Her? Or himself? He had a thief as a pet, one who now knew many secrets in the Institute. One who’d adored him and was probably still ferociously loyal. She’d devoured Clay after he attacked the mage, after all. If Reist lost her, how brittle was his hold on the title of Right Hand?
“Everything?” He’d never get that. Not from her. Not anymore. “Including me witnessing you having sex with Mage Braith?”
Heat colored Reist’s cheeks. Whether from embarrassment or anger, she wasn’t certain. “Ava...” He worked his jaw. “You need to wash.” He pointed back into the shadows to an archway. “Then I want you in my rooms.”
Her chest bloomed and she stopped herself shooting a quick look at Heyerdar. Sex. Reist would fuck her and break the connection she’d formed. Heyerdar had almost got her what she wanted. Almost. Reist was going to fuck her out of obligation. Not because he cared, or that he wanted her. But maybe when he did...
Ava held down a wince. Over ten years, and he’d managed to resist her charms. But breaking whatever it was between her and Heyerdar made sense. His saying her name had her climbing up his body like a bitch in heat. He couldn’t have that power over her. She ignored the twist in her gut and gave a slow nod.
Heyerdar caught her arm. “Where’re you going?” The question came out more as a rumble, edged with anger.
“To wash,” she said, pulling herself free of his touch. “You’re whole and healthy now.”
His brows drew together and his mouth parted. He wanted to say more, but Ava slipped into the darkness of the bedroom, letting the shadows ease over her. She found the vast marble bathroom from the sound of water spilling endlessly into crystal bowls. Magic fed the system, chambers fixed behind the tiled walls heating the steaming water and flickering the soft lights to brightness on the walls. She winced. Mage fuel.
Ava closed and bolted the paneled door and fell back against it. She let her chin drop to her chest. She was preparing herself for Reist. It didn’t feel real. Ten years of wanting, of having him be her
right...
and her nerves ate at her. She stared at the floor. Having sex with Heyerdar first had been a mistake. Hot, wild, but a mistake. He wanted Fallon...and every other woman within grabbing distance. Fallon might be able to live with his wandering dick. She was certain she couldn’t. Not again. She wouldn’t suffer another Reist.
She pushed herself away from the door and stripped, the dried and still-sticky blood catching and flaking on her fingers. She hadn’t lied. She had no regrets about eating Clay. The meat of him had tasted foul and disgusting—it still burned at the back of her throat—but he had to die. And fast. She’d loosed the monster within her.
And she didn’t know how she felt about that. Bitter? Powerful? Shit scared?
She brushed her teeth hard and scrubbed her skin with a block of soap that warmed with the scent of jasmine, the stained and bloodied water continually churning and refreshed. She ducked her head under the fountain of water, letting it stream over her face and hair before she attacked it with soap.
“Here.”
Ava shrieked and leapt back from the bowl. A meaty hand caught her before she tripped on the raised tiles and fell back into the room’s sunken bath. “Fuck.”
“I don’t think so.”
“Heyerdar...” His name came out as a growl and his fingers flexed around her arm. She stared at the wall behind them. “You pushed through?”
He wrapped a large, soft sheet around her. “Dry yourself.”
“We’re done.” She backed away. “I fuck Reist, and even if it’s nothing more than that, even if he never sees sense, we—you and me—we’re done. It’s time to take my chances with fate. Not try to force it.” She hugged the sheet to her, hating that she felt nervous. Her gaze flicked over his change of clothes. The plain guard uniform reminded her too much of the previous few days. “You magicked that?”
He shrugged. “You’re going to fuck him?”
“Yes.”
His expression didn’t change and Ava was surprised that she was looking for something in his face. He could say her name. Make it impossible to resist him. Do something that said he wanted to stop her. Which was ridiculous. From the beginning he had agreed to their deal. He was using her to get Fallon back.
She smirked at him, denying the strange twist of regret in her gut. Heyerdar wasn’t for her, nor she for him. Not really. “Maybe he’ll be overwhelmed. Realize what he’s been ignoring.”
“His grandmother was an elemental.”
Ava blinked. “
Reist?
”
“About five centuries back.” He tilted his head. “Maybe one of Zarand’s gifts to the city.”
Reist had kept that knowledge hidden, hidden even from her. It had to give him an edge over the other mages. Did he have a connection to the earth the way Heyerdar and Zarand did? She pressed her hand to her mouth. Was that where her attraction had begun? He was a quarter elemental. She was a thief. Was she supposed to be with him the way that Zarand had sought out Ehren? But was the human part of him fighting or ignoring his need?
“Dry?” He stepped back and pulled a sliver of gold from the wall. He flapped it out, the slippery material proving to be a cloak with a hood. He held it up. “You need something to wear.”
She stood with her back to him, lifting the tangle of her damp hair and waiting for the fall of material against her skin. She closed her eyes. His fingertips almost touched the skin of her neck, the tease of heat and magic tightening her belly.
“Drop your towel.” His voice was low and raw.
Ava untucked the material from around her breasts and let it fall to puddle at her feet. Cool air rippled over her still-damp skin, pebbling her nipples. “We can’t do anything, Heyerdar.”
His breathing deepened. “I’m taking one last look.” He pressed the gold fabric to her shoulders, his heavy hands cupping her upper arms. “Nothing more.”
“You’re touching.” Ava stared at the fallen towel. His magic writhed over her, but she willed herself not to pull it down into her flesh. They couldn’t have whatever this was. He moved around her on silent feet and tied the little gold thread that would keep the cloak secure. His skin brushed her throat, her collarbone, and Ava bit back a groan. “You can’t...”
He draped the cool material over her breasts. “I’m not.”
Ava willed herself to open her eyes. Heyerdar’s face was in shadow, his eyes a flat, emotionless gold. The need to say something, anything, burned on her tongue. “I’m sorry I couldn’t get Fallon back for you.” She hadn’t expected to say
that
though.
“Are you?”
She let a smile pull at her mouth. “You deserve to have who you want.”
He gave her a short nod. “You too.”
And there was the admission that he didn’t want her. It shouldn’t hurt. They hardly knew each other. One night of incredible sex couldn’t measure up against the ten years of friendship she’d had with Reist. It couldn’t. It didn’t. But still, her heart twisted, and the pain burned in her chest. “It’s time.”
Heyerdar stepped back from her. “You did well, little thief.”
“What are you going to do now?” She had to leave, find Reist on the other side of the bathroom door, but she wanted these few precious seconds. She would never know him like this again. “I mean...”
“I’ll head down into the city.”
Ava’s stomach turned. Madam Lunete and Ziskia. He’d have his normal life back now. His curiosity about her was sated, and the thieves and the threat to the Crown were gone. “Good,” she murmured. She dragged the coldness of her soul around her, needing it to chill the pain from her thoughts. She gave him a thief smile. “Have fun then.”
Ava turned away before he saw her tears.
Chapter Seventeen
She didn’t know where to put her hands. They formed fists at her sides before she stretched her fingers and laced them low across her abdomen. She’d never been inside Reist’s new rooms. Before he ascended to become the Highest Mage, his warren of small rooms had been piled with papers and dark with heavy furniture.
The rooms he had now mirrored the emperor’s. Wide, with curved ceilings that swam with magic, reflecting the afternoon light and sky. A few pieces of furniture—the battered high-backed chair he’d brought up so long ago from the lower halls and a deep cedar chest that belonged to his mother—had followed him to his new home. The rest screamed of wealth, of the faded magic of impossibly powerful men and women. It made her skin itch.
Nerves pushed at her. “How does this happen, Reist?”
“Tea.” He handed her a whitebane cup, his mouth tight until she choked it back. The cold and bitter herb bound in its sliver of magic wound through her body. Protecting her. She held the chilled cup, hating to remember how Heyerdar had offered her his cup as if it were important, warming it with his magic. Making it a ceremony between them.
Blindly, she dropped the little cup on to a table, the sharp clatter of ceramic against wood jumping through her strung nerves.
Reist shucked off his outer robe and dropped it over his battered chair. Light from the row of mullioned windows carved his features and he pressed his hand to his jaw. “You should have told me. That you were a virgin before you went to him.”
Ava wanted to laugh. As if that would’ve done anything. She asked him anyway. “Would you have rectified it?”
His dark eyes held hers. “Yes.”
Her mouth opened but no words came out. She swallowed, her throat dry. “You’d have fucked me?”
“You’ve been badly influenced by him.” Reist straightened his shoulders. “You’ve been with me for ten years. Been unfailingly loyal. Of course I would’ve taken care of you.”
Ava winced. “Taken care of me.”
“Ava...” Her name came out on a long breath and he closed the distance between them. Her heartbeat jumped with every sure step he took. “I know what you’ve wanted from me for a long time.” Something moved through his eyes and her laced fingers tightened. Her chest hurt. “But you have to understand—”
“Can you
not
say how much you don’t want me, just before you fuck me?”
His beautiful mouth moved into a smile and she tried to forget how many times she daydreamed about leaning on the balcony they shared every morning and kissing him. He stroked her damp hair back from her temple. “It’s complicated.”
Ava shivered at the brush of his fingertips against her skin. “It didn’t have to be.”
“I’m a mage, an unWorded thief, with elemental blood. You were a risk. A risk my ambition wouldn’t let me take.”
She frowned. “But you just said...”
“I’m the Right Hand now.”
Her stomach turned over and the stupid hope that she lived with for ten years flared. Bitterness edged it. If she’d waited just that little bit longer, told Reist she was a virgin, she would be bound to him the way she was now to Heyerdar. But...he’d been the Right Hand for weeks. And the woman he’d dragged into his bed hadn’t been her. “So I came second to your ambition? How long would you have kept me dangling if Clay hadn’t staged his little coup?”
His finger traced down her jaw, and her skin prickled. Only a few days before, this would’ve kept her hopes alive, burning with the idea that he wanted so much more than work and friendship. She was stupidity itself.
“I wanted to be your first, Ava. A part of the elemental in me, perhaps. But I couldn’t risk it. I needed to be free.” Pressure tightened his words, gave them force, but then he paused. “You don’t seem surprised.”
“That you have an elemental in your past? No. Heyerdar told me.”
She wasn’t surprised about his needing to be free either. Not if she was being brutally honest. Reist had used his body to gain position and power. She’d known that all along, she’d simply never seen it in such a light. Cold, hard and ambitious. Apprentices proved they had control of their natures before high magic surged through them. Reist was proof that they could twist their needs to suit themselves.
And she’d criticized Heyerdar for enjoying himself. At least Heyerdar had acted when he wanted her. There had been...need. Passion.
“But you’re not free. There’s Fallon.”
“Fallon.” He stretched his fingers and a stream of sweet magic caressed the air.
Ava fought not to pull it into herself, and watched as an image formed of a tall woman with dark blond hair. The apparition thickened, until the woman standing beside her was almost real, magic pushing gold threads under her skin, over her robes.
Ava stiffened. “Mage Braith.”
Her serene face moved into a smile. “Ava Kalle. Davin wanted you to know the truth about why I left Nahum.” Her gaze dropped. “And I didn’t think it would be appreciated if I stood before you in the flesh.” She looked up again. “This is your time.”
She was so fucking graceful about everything. Ava had always loathed and envied that talent in Fallon. “Why did you leave him?” Her mind filled with the memory of Heyerdar’s hands, his mouth, the wild rush of need that sparked at a simple touch, and the insanity that gripped her when he drove her hard to release. Fallon had given that up. “What did he do?”
“You can never have his heart. He breaks you. No matter how much you give him, you can never be enough.” A blush darkened Fallon’s cheeks. “I was never enough. And I left him before he got
my
heart.” She wet her lips. “He gets inside your head, knows you like no one else. That kind of...power can eat away at you until you’re willing to accept anything. Anything.”
Fallon held her gaze and pain moved there. The first flicker of guilt pricked at Ava. She’d tried to drive Fallon back to a man who would consume her.
“He still wants you.”
“He doesn’t. His pride does.” Fallon looked to Reist. “Davin will break his hold over you. Let him.” Her smile turned wicked. She stroked a finger across Reist’s lips, slow and teasing, her form fading. “Enjoy him.”
The final words were almost a whisper and she was gone.
Ava pushed out a slow breath. If a woman with all the power Fallon had wasn’t enough for Heyerdar, then she, with none, with an inverse of power, would never have what he wanted. He liked her taking him, stripping him of his magic. Was that simply a kink? And Fallon had confirmed that one woman was never enough for him. She couldn’t agree to that...even as she found herself standing there with another man.
“How long would you have left me, Reist?”
He ran his fingers along the length of her shoulder, warming the silk against her skin. “Honestly? I don’t know. Fallon changed everything. Changed me.”
A stone sank into Ava’s stomach. He cared for her. He in all likelihood was starting to love her. “Am I here with Fallon’s permission?”
“Little thief...”
“Don’t call me that!” The sudden force behind her voice surprised her and she put quick fingers to her mouth. She swore. “He called me that, because to use my name...” She winced and changed the subject. “Fallon?”
“We talked about this.” Reist’s hands gripped her shoulders, the heat of his palms seeming to sear to the skin beneath. “She is...aware. She knows that this has to happen.” His hands moved down, tugging at the warm silk, easing it down Ava’s body. Her skin prickled at the wash of cool air and she fought to keep her hands loose. The urge to cover herself was fierce. “And I admit, I’ve always been curious.”
“So I’m a curiosity?” It sounded so much worse coming from him than it had from Heyerdar. More...sordid.
“No. We’ve been through a lot, you and I. We’re friends.” Her robe dropped to a puddle of cloth on the floor. “I want to be able to do this as friends.”
“Just this once?”
“Fallon and I...”
Ava pressed her lips together. “It’s getting serious.”
He smiled, the one she knew, her friend, the one who brought her tea and breakfast on their balcony in their years-old ritual. “It’s...unexpected.”
His voice was soft, reflective, and the warmth in his eyes wasn’t for her. Fallon had caught his heart in a way she never could. The twist of pain into her gut was sharp.
“She came to me. Wanted to use me as a cover, until Heyerdar grew bored. It became more.” His smile turned wry. “Not what you want to hear, I know.”
“I used Heyerdar’s power against you. Against Fallon. I thought I could...change your mind.” Her confession came out in a rush. “I found a treatise on sex magic...” She closed her eyes, waiting for the surge of his anger. The sudden need to admit her actions surprised her, but for the first time in a long time they were being truthful with each other. She had only this time with him. “I—”
“I left the book in your alcove.”
Ava stared at him. “You?”
“You were unraveling. You couldn’t exorcise the thief in you with blood and bone, but with life energy it could be satisfied. Bolstered.” He shrugged and his hand framed her jaw. His touch was hot, burning, and she almost shied away from it. “You spend so much time wandering the lower halls. I was certain the apprentices wouldn’t miss a little pulse of sexual energy.” He took her hand, and his thumb brushed over the faded lines of her
teken.
“I never wanted to use Words to hook you. Your choice, your freedom, means a lot to me.”
She frowned. “Why?”
“I needed to know if I could hold you without it. How being free could still tie you to me. The way a thief’s loyalty to a warlord held and protected him.”
She was an
experiment.
She yanked her hand from his. “I don’t know you at all.”
His eyes darkened and his thumb traced her mouth. “You will. You have to.”
Ava wet her lips and inadvertently licked the tip of his thumb. The salty taste of skin caught her breath. And there was something...something familiar about it. Her stomach lurched and she stiffened. She closed her eyes. It didn’t make sense. The insanity of it burst a question from her. “How can you taste like Clay?”
Stupid. How long had she lived in the Institute? Woven around the games the mages loved to play, the mess of politics and power. She’d given herself away. “I mean...”
Reist’s fingers pressed into her shoulder and she ignored the bite of pain. “It’s not what you think.”
She fought to stay calm. Even a thin wrap of her darkness eluded her. He was her friend. He’d never lied to her... Her gut was in a knot, and fear clutched her. Had he played them all? Let Clay take the blame for
his
plan? And fuck, she was completely alone with him. “I...I don’t think it’s anything.” She had to deny it. The fact that she would have to devour him pushed horror into her chest. She gave a quick nod. “We should—”
“Ava...”
She bit her lip, tasting skin, and closed her eyes. He knew that she knew. And he would kill her. Reist was cold and ambitious and a little thing like ten years of devoted service wouldn’t stop him. She was an experiment to him. A mage’s thirst for knowledge taken beyond the pages of their vellum books. He could at least satisfy her curiosity before their fight to the death began. “How could you? All those people—those
children—
who died, because you, what? Wanted to be emperor?”
“Not emperor.”
His thumb played back across her lip and she inhaled his scent. How had she missed it, his connection to Clay? Because that man had masked it, played with who he was with disturbing ease. Only with his magic broken and his flesh bare in her mouth could she know him.
“What then?”
“Freedom.” His forefinger traced a slow line down her throat, no doubt feeling her nervous swallow. “From what I had to become.”
Ava stared at him, the fear pushed aside as disbelief fired through her. Was he trying to tell her that his ambitions, his inexorable rise to become Highest Mage, meant
nothing
to him? “I don’t believe you.”
A dark smile touched his mouth and his hand slid lower. “Questioning your master?” He cupped her breast. Ava sucked in a quick, startled breath.
“Reist!” His name came out on a burst of air. She wasn’t ready. She wanted to run, to hide, to put as much of the Institute and the city between her and the man pushing too close. His bare hand on her bare skin pricked little stabs of fire. “I—”
“I’ll share the truth with you and we’ll never speak of this again.”
Ava focused on his words, stiffening as his hand slipped over her waist, his fingers stroking lower until he teased his fingertips across her backside. “The truth.” Her words came out on a squeak. Magic threaded through the darkness of his eyes, but the thief in her didn’t rise to its lure. She pressed her lips together. He wouldn’t taste like Heyerdar. “What’s the truth?”
“Clay was a test.” He squeezed her breast, trapping her nipple. The sharp tug forced her to bite her tongue to deny the quick dart of pain. “I had to know if wards could be changed.”
Ava clamped her hand over his. She had to drive the thought, the need, for Heyerdar out. She hated that she still had to do this. “Tell me. Then we fuck.”
Reist frowned and his hand softened. “I’m not going to fuck you. I’m not...him. I don’t call it fucking.”
“Why Clay?” She gripped his wrists, stopping his hands from finding more of her flesh. She didn’t know this man, the one who could allow the murders to happen. It was a physical pain in her belly that he’d fooled her...and that she would still have to let him into her body. “How did you find him?”
Reist let out a long, slow breath, and it stirred her skin. A shiver ran over her. “I’ve always known about Sentos Clay.” The magic faded from his eyes and something like regret moved over his face. “As a mage, when the realization takes you that you’re not like anyone else, that you’ve stopped aging, that there’s this well of power that’s just yours...” He closed his eyes. “It’s called the insanity. It swept me up about a hundred years ago. I fathered a child.”
Thoughts pushed together, connected in her mind. “Davia Clay. His mother.” Bile pushed into her mouth and she fought it back. A hot flush of guilt and horror wrenched her insides. “Sentos was your grandson.” She paused. “But why wasn’t he or Davia brought into the Institute?”