Dark Moon (13 page)

I spent Saturday
at Michael’s apartment. We got up and went for a jog – well, a jog/walk,
since I was not a natural runner. “Keep up, Luna,” Michael teased, jogging
backwards in front of me.

I slowed to a
walk. “You have longer legs than me,” I complained.

“Whatever you say,
Luna.” Michael took off, yelling, “Catch me if you can,” over his shoulder.

I sprinted after
him. I could see Michael slow down, and knew he was going to let me catch up.
“Gotcha!” I yelled, wrapping my arms around his waist. Michael lost his balance
and we both went tumbling into the grass.

“Oh my God, are
you hurt?” I asked him, smoothing back his hair.

“What do you
think?” Michael shot me a flirty grin, then was back on his feet in a flash,
jogging in the direction of his apartment. I went running after him, trying not
to waste my breath on laughter. When we got back, Michael made us pancakes and
bacon.

The day flew by.
It was the most perfect lazy Saturday I could have ever imagined.

“I wish we didn’t
have to meet MA and Toby tonight,” I groaned. We were sitting on the couch, my
legs draped across Michael’s lap.

“We haven’t gone
out with them in a few weeks,” he pointed out.

“I know I sound
like a bad friend,” I muttered.

“Not at all,”
Michael said. “You think I don’t want you all to myself? I just know your
friendship with Maryanne means the world to you. Hoes before bros,” he joked.

I laughed. “I
think the saying is bros before hoes and it only applies to men.” I smacked him
with a pillow from the couch, which led to him pinning me down and tickling me.

“Stop!” I
screamed, giggling, not meaning a word of it.

Michael threw up
his hands. “As the lady wishes.”

Now it was my turn
to tackle him and pin
him
down. “The lady wishes,” I mumbled, pulling
down his shorts. I went down on him, savoring every delish moan of pleasure.
When he finished, Michael’s face was flushed. “I’m so afraid I might blink and
find out this is all a dream,” he said in a soft voice.

I got on the couch
and laid my head on his chest. “I’m here to stay,” I said as his hands stroked
my breasts, my hard nipples. “You just came,” I said, laughing. “Don’t drive me
crazy if you can’t deliver,” I said suggestively.

It was all of the
encouragement that Michael needed. Within seconds he was tasting me, returning
the same favor I had just given him.

When it was over
we were lying together on the couch, both naked from the waist down, holding
each other. I jolted when I heard my phone ringing.
Fuck. What time is it?

I pulled myself
into a sitting position and grabbed my phone off the table. It was Maryanne.

“Hello,” I said on
the fifth ring.

“Lana, I was just
about to hang up! I need to tell you something before dinner tonight.”

“Um, okay,” I said,
pulling the phone away from my ear to check the time. It was only six. Good. We
weren’t meeting MA and Toby until half past seven.

“It’s just I know
that you’re expecting Toby tonight, but the truth is, it wasn’t working with
him and…I met someone else. I’m bringing my new boyfriend.”

“Huh?” I was
confused.

“I need to go get
ready; I just didn’t want to blindside you. Lana, I think he’s the one,”
Maryanne said dreamily. “I’ve never felt this way before in my life. I know you
and Michael will love him. Bye now!”

Before I could say
a word, Maryanne had hung up the phone. Michael sat up on the couch, looking
sleepy. “What was that all about?” he asked me.

“Apparently we’re
meeting Maryanne and her
new
boyfriend tonight for dinner,” I said,
feeling slightly miffed.

Michael’s eyebrows
shot up in surprise. “Not Toby?” he asked.

“I guess she isn’t
seeing him anymore?” I shrugged my shoulders, still hurt that this was the
first I was hearing about it.

“Hey.” Michael
leaned forward and started massaging my shoulders. “Don’t worry about it. I
know Maryanne is your best friend, but does she always confide in you when it
comes to her boyfriends?”

“Well, no,” I
admitted, thinking of how Doug had dumped her before she even told me they had
been dating exclusively.

“She’s not like
you,” Michael said. “I’m sure you told her about me the second you saw me,” he
teased. I turned my head and kissed Michael, who was still massaging me.

“I couldn’t keep
you to myself,” I said honestly.

“I’m pretty good
at reading people, and I think Maryanne is hesitant when it comes to guys. Like
she’s been burned in the past and doesn’t want to talk about it until she knows
it’s something real,” Michael said.

I thought of her
first boyfriend, Bobby, and how he bragged to the whole school about taking her
virginity. “You’re right,” I said slowly. “She’s not an open book when it comes
to her relationships. I guess I just thought she’d confide in me a little
more.”

“You can’t change
people,” Michael said. “If you really care about them, you just have to accept
them, flaws and all.”

“How did you lose
your virginity?” I asked impulsively, my mind still on Bobby.

“Woah, I wasn’t
expecting
that
question right about now,” Michael said.

“I think Maryanne’s
first had a big influence on how she acts now,” I admitted. “And I want to know
everything about you. That includes the woman who first had her way with
Michael Reynolds.”

“I was fourteen,”
Michael started. “Yeah, I know that’s young,” he said, seeing the surprised
look on my face. “She was seventeen and my next door neighbor. We weren’t even
dating. One day she came over to play video games after school. And it
just…happened. I don’t know why. It was meaningless, empty. Nothing like when I
make love to you…or how I hope you feel about your first time.”

“I don’t regret a
thing,” I said honestly. “I love that you’re my first, my only. And that will
never change.”

We sat in silence,
Michael stroking my hair, until I reluctantly got up from the couch.
“Unfortunately, I need to get ready.”

Michael stretched.
“Me, too.”

I showered and
changed into a simple gray knit dress with pockets. It was one of the outfits
I’d picked up on my shopping trip with Maryanne a couple of days ago. We were
meeting at a bar called The Tracks, which was in the university area near the
railroad tracks. They offered half price shots if you ordered while a train was
passing.

“You look
adorable,” Michael asked when he saw me.

We got to the bar
a few minutes early and sat down at a table for four. “I wonder what this guy
is like?” I mused. “MA was so excited! She sounded – well, she sounded
like how
I
feel about you,” I admitted.

“So then it must
be the real deal.” Michael rested his hand on my thigh protectively. I had come
to love when he did that. It made me feel like I was his, and no one else could
ever take me away.

I spotted Maryanne
first. Her eyes were scanning the crowded room, looking for Michael and me. Her
face lit up when she saw us and she waved. The bar was dimly lit, and I
struggled to see her date. He was walking behind her; all I caught a glimpse of
was thick, jet-black hair.
Maryanne’s type. Just like my type.

And then they were
at the table. Maryanne yelled over the noise. “Damon, this is my best friend
Lana and her boyfriend, Michael.” It was then that Maryanne’s date stepped out
from behind her.

I blinked, not
understanding what I was seeing. Then I squinted, sure that my eyes were
playing tricks on me. But no, it was not a trick, not a horrible joke. I knew
beyond a shadow of a doubt that Maryanne’s new boyfriend was Damon Winters, the
boy I had almost killed when he tried to rape me five years ago.

I stared at Damon,
my whole body tense, expecting to see him looking back at me with the same expression
of shock and disbelief. But no, Damon was calm, cool. “Nice to meet you, Lana,”
he said with a comfortable smile. “Maryanne has told me so much about you.” He
turned to Michael. “And you too, Michael.” He pumped Michaels’ hand
enthusiastically.

Maryanne was
speaking. I willed myself to focus on her words. “Damon transferred here
mid-semester,” she said, her voice bubbling over with excitement. “We met in
calculus class.” She turned to direct her next words at me. “I didn’t want to
tell you, Lana, because I was so scared someone would pinch me and I would find
out it was all a dream.”

“Uh-huh,” I said
distractedly. My eyes were focused on Damon. He was watching Maryanne as she
spoke, but glanced over at me when she said my name, a smirk playing on his
lips.

There’s no
fucking way he doesn’t know it’s me. His first girlfriend. Those nights at
summer camp. When I beat the shit out of him.

My mind was
racing. I felt like I should have said something, should have gotten it out in
the open right away when Maryanne introduced us.
Damon is the piece of shit
who tried to force me to have sex with him.
I told myself I could still say
the words now, that it wasn’t too late; I opened my mouth to spat them out, but
clamped it back shut.

Why is he here?
Damon must have known that Maryanne’s best friend Lana was
his
Lana,
from five years go. And Damon wasn’t surprised, so he had seen this coming.

“So Maryanne says
you’re a doctor,” Damon said to Michael, flashing his charming grin. It was the
same smile that had made my heart melt when I was fifteen years old. I felt
goose bumps prickling on my arms, but not the goose bumps I got when Michael
touched me.

Michael was
responding, but I couldn’t hear him over the deafening in my ears. I felt
trapped. It was like I was a teenager again, about to be forced into a
situation I wasn’t ready for. But I’d never be ready to see Damon Winters. That
chapter of my life was supposed to be closed. Forever.

Maryanne leaned
forward while Damon and Michael chatted. “Isn’t he wonderful?” she asked, a
dreamy expression on her face.

“Wonderful,” I managed
to repeat, feeling like I had the vocabulary of a caveman.

“And you’re going to
be a doctor as well?” Damon asked me.

I nodded, studying
his face. He looked the same as I remembered, except a little bit older. Those
piercing blue eyes, the ones the used to drive me wild, were looking at me with
an expression that was, well, triumphant.
He’s won.
But what had he won?
Why was he here? Did he truly fall for Maryanne, then later connect the dots
about her roommate? Or was he using Maryanne to get to me?

No, it had to be a
coincidence. Damon probably forgot about me the second his family moved away.
But deep down I wasn’t so sure.

Michael leaned
over. “Are you okay?” he said worriedly. “You’re awfully quiet.”

“I feel sick,” I
replied. It was the truth.

“Do we need to
leave?” Michael asked.

Yes
I
wanted to scream, but instead I shook my head no. I had to stick around, figure
out what game Damon was playing.

“I just need a
drink.” I grabbed the shots menu.
Brain Freeze.
That sounded like a good
one. The waitress hadn’t been to our table yet; I looked around impatiently.

“If you’re feeling
sick I don’t think a drink is going to help.” Michael was looking at me, an odd
expression on his face.

“I’m sick because
I’m stressed.” Again, that was the truth. “Huge project at school,” I said,
before Michael could question the source of my stress.

Finally the
waitress came over and we placed our orders.

I dug my
fingernails into my leg until it bled, willing our drinks to get there. “You
can go ahead and bring another for me,” I told the waitress as soon as she set
down the first one. I downed the shot, thinking that the name was fitting.
Whatever was in it, it burned as it went down my throat, and my head felt light
almost immediately.

“Lana, you’re
worrying me,” Michael said. Only Maryanne and I were doing shots; Damon and
Michael were both drinking beer.

“Just having fun.”
I forced a smile.

Feeling a little
more relaxed, I turned to Damon. “Why did you transfer here?” I asked.

“My father’s
sick…cancer. It…doesn’t look good, so I wanted to be close to him. They’re not
sure how long he’s going to live.”

Maryanne squeezed
Damon’s hand. He turned to her and smiled. “Thank God I’ve got Maryanne to help
me through this horrible time.”

“Have you met his
dad?” I asked her.

“Not yet,” she
replied.

So, could just
be a big lie.

As the evening
progressed, I quit counting how many shots I had ordered. Three? Four? Shit,
maybe I was on number five. I knew I’d reached my limit when the room started
spinning. I managed to stand up without falling over. “I’m going to the ladies
room,” I mumbled, making my way unsteadily towards the restrooms.

When I got there,
I stood in front of the mirror, bracing my hands on the sink. I looked even
paler than usual. My lips were literally white. I turned on the tap and
splashed the icy cold water onto my face.

The nausea was overwhelming.
I barely made it to the toilet and fell to my knees before the stream of putrid
vomit poured out of my mouth. I threw up over and over again, feeling like it
was the punishment I deserved. Punishment for thinking I could live as though I
were fully human. Punishment for stupidly believing that my past didn’t matter,
as long as I had Michael.

When all of the
alcohol was gone, I kept heaving, but there was nothing left to come up.

“Lana, are you
okay?” Maryanne was knocking at the door.

I stood up
shakily. “I’m fine,” I said, flushing the toilet and unlocking the stall.

“Were you throwing
up?” she asked, surprised.

“No,” I lied. “I
just had to pee.” I walked over to the sink to wash my hands.

“Okay.” I could
see Maryanne’s reflection in the mirror. She was standing behind me, looking at
me skeptically. “Is everything okay? You haven’t been yourself tonight. Did you
and Michael get in a fight or something?”

Poor, naïve, sweet
Maryanne. She had no clue that she was sleeping with the enemy.

“I think I’m just
stressed out about all the schoolwork I have to do,” I said, using the same
reason I’d given Michael.

“We should go soon;
Damon lives off-campus, so he doesn’t have a roommate. I’m staying at his place
tonight.” She grinned happily.

“Great,” I managed
to choke out, feeling like I might vomit again.

We walked back out
to the table. I forced a big fake smile for Michael. He smiled back
uncertainly.

“You ready to call
it a night?” Maryanne asked Michael and Damon. Damon leaned over and kissed
Maryanne on the cheek.

“I can’t wait to
have you all to myself.” I could barely hear him over the deafening noise of
the bar. His words made me cringe.

When we had
settled the tab and were standing outside, Damon put his arm around Maryanne’s
waist and turned to Michael and me. “It was great to meet you guys,” he said,
sounding completely sincere. He was looking me in the eyes when he said it.

“Yeah, we should
get together again soon,” Michael agreed. I nodded, unable to speak.

“I’ll be back home
sometime tomorrow,” Maryanne told me. “Maybe I’ll see you.”

“Maybe.”

We headed to our
cars.

“Damon seems nice,”
Michael commented as we pulled out of the lot.

“Yeah, they make a
cute couple,” I said flatly.

“Lana, are you
sure you’re okay? Are you still feeling sick? You had five shots.”

“Oh, I’m fine,” I
said flippantly.

We didn’t say much
on the rest of the ride back to Michael’s apartment. I needed to be alone, to
think
– but it would just make him even more suspicious if I insisted on
spending the night alone in my dorm room.

Despite my
protests that I was feeling fine, Michael insisted that I get some rest.

“Let’s at least
watch a movie,” I suggested.
Then I won’t have to talk.

Concerned that I
was coming down with something, Michael got a blanket and tucked it around me
on the couch. Then he sat down next to me so I could rest my head on his lap. I
felt safe, secure, at least for the moment.

I closed my eyes
so that Michael would think I had fallen asleep. I was exhausted, but my mind
was racing. My perfect world was falling apart. It was the first time we had spent
the night together that we didn’t make love.

The truth was, as
much as I tried to convince myself otherwise, I knew that Damon had come here
because of me.