Dark Side of Dawn: The Nightmare Chronicles (21 page)

“You can’t take her,” Padera insisted. “I won’t let you. I’m the one who stole the amulet. I gave it to the human.” She looked right at me when she spoke. “I only wish he had done his job before you destroyed his mind.”

Padera’s confession put a halt to everything. The Council wanted to have a private conversation with Morpheus and Hadria about matters, and that meant that I was sent back to the palace. I have no idea where Madrene and Padera were taken, but I bet they had a lot to talk about. Madrene looked both enraged and devastated, and somehow managed to still look beautiful. She and my father would have made an incredible-looking couple.

That thought was still swimming around my head as Verek took me home. What had Madrene seen in Antwoine that made her give up a god? I suppose the same things I saw in Noah that made him so much more ap
pealing to me than the beautiful hunk of man sitting beside me. Verek was lovely, but he wasn’t Noah. And my father wasn’t Antwoine. And for my mother, the man whom she married couldn’t compare with the man of her dreams. We don’t get to pick and choose who we love. That was something both humans and Dreamkin had in common.

Look at me being all philosophical. Easy to do when the Council’s decided you don’t have to be ripped apart and rebuilt into something new.

“I’m glad they sided in your favor,” Verek said, not looking at me.

“Thanks. Hopefully they won’t change their minds.”

“I doubt it. You should increase your training—learn all you can about this world. It will keep them off your back.”

“Hey,” I said with a lift of my hands. “I’m trying.”

He smiled. “I’ll help you.”

I snorted. I’d be better off with Antwoine for knowledge of the world, but Verek knew how to fight. “You just want an excuse to kick my ass.”

“You know me so well.”

We grinned at each other and I could sense the truce forming, the bridges rebuilding. Verek, for some reason known only to himself, wanted me. But he wasn’t about to let that get in the way of us being friends. Or, maybe the big brute was so arrogant he assumed that if he was
patient enough I’d eventually give in. I hope he didn’t hold his breath.

Funny, but two months ago—not even that long—I would have never believed that a guy who looked like him would be into someone like me. Now, the fact that he was occurred to me as just another part of my life. Huh.

“I’ll come for you when the Council reconvenes,” Verek promised as he left me just inside the palace doors. The obsidian-skinned guards stood outside, their thick velvety wings tucked around them like living cloaks.

I felt safe with them out there protecting me, but I had no illusions that they were under orders to stop me should I try to leave. Of course, my father was probably the only person who could stop me from doing whatever I wanted. I wasn’t going to test that theory, especially since it had already been decided that I could go ahead and escape—if I was willing to face being unmade once I entered the Dreaming again. There was no way to avoid that. Even when I made my own little dreamworld when I turned my back on what I was after Jackey Jenkins, I still came into the Dreaming, just like everyone else. It was one of those things—like death and taxes.

I gave Verek a hug and thanked him for everything. Once he was gone, I didn’t feel like going to my room
and obsessing over everything that might or might not happen. Instead I went to the library, where I was sure to find something to occupy my mind.

What I found was my mother, stretched out on one of the large sofas, a fuzzy purple blanket pulled up around her shoulders. Her eyes fluttered open when the door closed behind me.

“You okay?” I asked as I approached.

“Mm-hm.” Groggily, she sat up, smoothing her mussed hair with her hand. Her pale peach pants and cream blouse were wrinkled—something I found oddly disturbing.

“I didn’t know you slept in this world,” I remarked. Obviously I did, but I was part of it. Mom was just another dreamer.

“Cat naps,” she replied with a yawn. “I guess I’m getting old. I seem to need them more than I used to.”

She was trying to make light, but I knew without asking that these “naps” had become more frequent once the doctor started work on her case back home. If Morpheus’s hold on her broke…Man, I did not want to think about that. My father would lose it.

“How did things go with the Council. Did your father fix everything?”

God, what line of BS was he feeding her? This was so beyond his control. “They’re taking a break,” I replied honestly. “Padera jumped up and admitted that
she gave Durdan the amulet that gave him power in this realm.”

Mom’s face hardened. She looked tired. Worse, she looked old. “Bitch. I’m surprised she confessed.”

I don’t think I’d ever heard my mother use such a harsh tone before. It surprised me. I guess I truly meant something to her after all. “Only because they were going to punish Madrene for it—it was her amulet.”

The lines around her mouth deepened. “Ah.” She ran her hands over her blouse, brushing away some of the wrinkles. “I think I’d like some tea. What about you? Shall I ring for some?”

She wasn’t going to avoid the topic that easily. I concentrated on the coffee table before her, imagining her favorite tea set on top, loaded with a plate of sandwiches and another of scones, jam, and cream. The air shivered a little, then actually blurred before pulling back into focus once more. When it did, the tea service sat upon the table, the pot steaming. There was a cup, saucer, and small plate for each of us. Silverware as well.

Mom’s jaw dropped as her eyes widened. She looked up at me from her seat on the sofa with a look of awe and maternal pride. “Dawnie! Look what you did!”

I almost expected her to start clapping for her little girl. It wasn’t a big deal, but I puffed up with pride and beamed under her approval anyway.

I sat next to her on the sofa, fixed her a cup of tea the
way she liked it, and filled a plate for her before doing the same for myself. As I plunked a second scone on my plate beside the three sandwiches I’d already placed on the fine china, I leaned back and looked at Mom. “You didn’t know, huh?”

She didn’t bother to pretend ignorance. We were blood—she knew what I was talking about.

“I didn’t want to know,” she amended with just a touch of bitterness as she plopped a large dollop of clotted cream onto a jam-dripping scone. So this is where I got my emotional eating. “I knew he had been with Madrene, just like I know there have been others. I know there are other children as well.”

Regardless, I wasn’t about to mention my suspicions about Gladios. That was too weird. “So what’s the issue?”

She scowled, suddenly a lot fiercer than I ever remember her being. “The difference is that his kid is bullying my little girl and he never saw fit to tell me that one little detail.”

I smiled in sympathy. “He wasn’t exactly open with either of us, but in his defense, it probably never occurred to him.”

Mom snorted. “You give him more credit than I do. I love that man, Dawnie, but I know his flaws to the last, insignificant one. He was hoping we’d never find out.”

You know, maybe I underestimated my mother. I’m
not saying I was ready to forgive her for everything—like abandoning her family—but I was starting to like her a whole lot more. “Did he apologize?”

Her face transformed with a sly smile. “He did. He still is.”

And then we both laughed, because, let’s face it, he deserved it. That’s what being all high and godly will get you.

We talked about the trial and about Noah. At least Mom thought I was right in giving him the amulet. “I’ll feel so much better knowing he’s around to help you in this place.”

I frowned. “You make it sound like you’re going somewhere.” I thought of our conversation when she asked me to look after Morpheus if anything should happen to her. “Is there something you need to tell me?”

She merely smiled—a little sadly I thought. “I worry about you.”

A little lump formed in my throat. Not enough to start me bawling, but just enough to bring that damn, all-too-familiar burn to my eyes. “I worry about you too.”

I didn’t stop her when she put her arm around my shoulders. Our plates and cups were on the table, so there was nothing to stop me from sliding closer to her. She was so little compared to me, so delicate and fragile, and yet I’d never felt more protected in all my life as I did that moment, in my mommy’s embrace.

“I hate this, Mom,” I whispered, knowing no one else would ever know of my confession. “How come no one ever seems to like me?”

I felt her smile as she stroked my hair. “They don’t know you, babe.” My throat tightened again. She hadn’t called me that in years.

“They don’t want to know me,” I complained bitterly. “They just want to hate me.”

“People here are no different than people anywhere. They hate what they don’t understand. You just have to make them understand.”

“Great,” I replied caustically. “That shouldn’t be difficult.”

“No,” she agreed with a soft chuckle. “Once you find your way, I don’t think it will be difficult at all.”

I fell silent, lost in my thoughts and anxieties—and trying to figure out when “finding my way” just might happen. I was tired, so frigging tired of all this drama.

“You know what you need?” Mom asked in that distinctly maternal tone that said
she
knew what I needed even if I didn’t. “You need a nap. Everything will be better after you get a little sleep.”

“I don’t think I could sleep right now.” Tired as I was, I was just too jittery.

“Nonsense,” she replied, and much to the dismay of my fragile emotional state, she began to hum what we always used to call a “dee-dee-dee” song. A soothing
melody, uttered low and sweet, made entirely of dees, das, and dos.

I was asleep before the second refrain.

Mom was right. A nap made everything better. When I woke up sometime later, I was on the sofa, but this time I was the one laid out with the soft, fluffy blanket pulled up to my chin. My mother sat in a large wingback chair on the other side of the coffee table. Noah sat in its twin. They talked in hushed tones.

They didn’t notice I was awake, so I took advantage of the time to watch Noah without him being aware. He chatted easily with my mother, the exotic lines and contours of his face open and without judgment. How did he see her? I resented that she left us, but did he see her as a woman who’d had the guts to leave a bad situation—who was anything but a victim? Even now, she fought to hold on to what she had.

When I looked at her that way, I didn’t feel half so angry anymore.

And when I looked at Noah, I saw someone worth fighting for. I had given him that amulet not only because I trusted him to watch my back, but because it put us on a more equal footing in this world, and that’s what I wanted for us to be—equals. I didn’t know if it would work, but I was willing to try. I could only hope that he would find that more appealing than be
ing a knight in shining armor, because I didn’t want to be rescued all the time and I didn’t want a guy who based his self-worth on whether or not he could save someone.

And I knew that Noah didn’t want someone who kept things from him because she was afraid of how he would react. Because she was afraid he would finally see her for a freak and leave. And I’d be lying if I didn’t say that I was still worried about that one. My issue, not his.

“You guys are talking about me, aren’t you?” I yawned as I sat up.

“You know it,” Noah replied with a lopsided grin that made my panties melt. “How you doing, Doc?”

I mussed my hair, scratched my head. “Okay. I’d like to go home.”

His smile faded. “I’d like that too.”

Our gazes locked, charging the air with all that was unsaid, but still communicated.

My mother cleared her throat and rose to her feet. “Well, if the two of you will excuse me, I have some things to do.”

I’m pretty sure that wasn’t true, but I appreciated her saying it all the same. “Thanks, Mom.”

She ran a hand over my hair and said good-bye to Noah before leaving. The second the door clicked shut behind her I was on Noah’s lap, my arms wrapped
around his neck, showing him just how happy I was to see him with a kiss that shook me right down to my toes.

“How are you doing really?” he asked when we broke apart. His hands rubbed slow circles on my back.

I rested my head against his. “I want it over, but I’m scared of how it’s going to end. Padera confessed to giving Durdan the amulet, but the Council isn’t impressed that I gave mine to you.”

“You told them?”

I shrugged. “They asked. It didn’t occur to me to lie.”

From the look on his face I knew that was exactly what Noah would have had me do. Not to protect him, but to protect myself.

“If I’d lied and they found out I’d be in even more trouble, Noah.”

“I know. I just don’t like being a part of it.”

Sighing, I slid off his lap and stood. I didn’t want to go through this again. “Well, since the Council knows that my sister threatened you, you are part of it all.”

Noah’s brows shot up. “Your
sister
?”

Oh hell. I winced. “Didn’t I tell you?”

He made a sound that might have been laughter—or maybe a curse. “Any thing else you forgot to mention?”

I managed a half-assed grin. “I’ll let you know if I remember anything else.”

He shook his head, running a hand through his hair. “Jesus, Doc. Warren and I aren’t even related and we’d never do anything like this to each other.”

I shrugged my eyebrows. “Yeah, well Warren doesn’t think you’re the Anti-Christ.”

He rubbed his jaw. “What’s your father saying about all of this?”

“Not a helluva lot. To be honest, I haven’t talked to him about it.”

Frowning, Noah tilted his head. “He’s on your side, isn’t he?”

“Oh yeah. It can’t be easy for him, though. Think about how conflicted and responsible he must be feeling.”

This time the sound he made was unmistakably laughter. “Analyzing the God of Dreams. Yeah, you’re okay.”

I smiled sheepishly. I would have gone to him and hugged him again if Verek hadn’t walked in at that exact moment.

“Excuse me,” the big guy said, giving Noah a narrow look. “The Council has reconvened.”

I exhaled a shaky breath. “Time to get this over with.” I held out my hand. “C’mon, Noah.”