so that he could see her face, he said, ‘There’s something
I’ve forgotten to do.’
‘There can’t be anything else,’ she murmured.
‘Oh there is, believe me,’ he laughed. ‘But I wasn’t
thinking of that.’
‘Then what were you thinking of?’ she smiled sleepily.
‘I was thinking of telling you I love you.’
Her eyes opened, and as she gazed back at him she felt a
choking knot of emotion swell in her throat.
‘And that I’m sorry for all I’ve put you through.’
‘It doesn’t matter,’ she whispered. ‘Nothing matters
except that you love me.’ She snuggled back into his arms,
thrilling at the feel of his hard body next to hers, the way its
strength and power made hers seem so soft and vulnerable.
She was, at long last, where she had always belonged, in his arms and in his heart, and it was as though she had finally
found a part of herself that had always been missing. She felt
complete.
After a while she looked at him again. His eyes were
closed, and her heart tightened with love as she took in every
inch of his face: the thick, heavy brows, the hooked nose, the
thin lips, powerful jaw, and the unsightly scar. Then, as he
opened one eye and smiled, her heart turned over.
She moved onto him, and he put his hands behind his
head, looking up at her and watching her face as she sat
astride his legs. She ran her hands over his chest, then
lowered her eyes to his penis, and as it started to grow she
glanced up at him. His eyebrows flickered, and she could
see that he was amused by her fascination. Then, taking him
in both hands, she caressed him to full erection.
When Claudine woke in the morning the room was flooded
with sunlight, and it was several seconds before she realized
why her body was aching so. With a smile she turned over and
then her heart contracted with love. For there were her
husband and her son together, little Louis’ sleeping face
resting on his father’s shoulder. Her eyes filled with tears.
Louis came in to her most every morning, but that morning,
having found Francois there, he had obviously climbed into
the other side of the bed. He was curled into the crook of
Francois’ arm, his tiny fist bunched under his cheek and his
raven black curls tumbling over his forehead. He looked so
small beside his father… she could hardly believe this was
happening, had never dared to believe she could be so
happy.
She looked down at the black mass of hair on Francois’
chest and tried to resist the urge to touch him. But when she
remembered the things he had done to her the night before,
desire surged so fiercely through her loins that her hand
reached out for him. And when her eyes moved back to his
face she found he was watching her.
She followed his hand as she lifted it to cup her breast,
and watched the way he rubbed his thumb over her achingly
hard nipple. Her eyes closed and her head fell back, but she
knew she must try to control herself while Louis was still
there. Then she started to laugh as she heard his melodious
little voice ask Francois what he was doing to Maman.
‘She’s a little sore there and I’m making her feel better,’
Francois laughed, swinging him up in the air and shaking
him. ‘And now, young man, it’s time you went back to your
own room to get dressed.’
‘But I don’t want to,’ Louis protested, as Francois
deposited him on the floor. ‘I want to stay here with you.’
‘Go and dress!’ Francois said sternly.
‘But Papa …’
‘Louis!’
Louis hung his head dolefully then promptly sat himself
down on the floor.
Claudine saw Francois’ lips twitch, and had to turn away
to hide her own smile.
‘Well, there’s nothing else for it,’ Francois said, flinging
back the sheets and getting out of bed. ‘I’ll just have to throw
you out.’
‘But why can’t I stay?’ Louis groaned, still hanging his
head.
‘Because Maman and I have something we need to do.
Now stop arguing.’ And taking him by the arm, Francois
pulled him to his feet. He realized immediately that it would
have been better to pick him up, but it was too late now, and
Louis’ black eyes, on a level with his thigh, were round with
wonder. Francois stole a quick look at Claudine and saw
that she was convulsed with laughter.
‘I’m glad you found that so amusing,’ Francois said, when
he had closed and locked the door behind his son. And
glowering at her darkly, he added, ‘Now I’d better deal with
you.’
‘Or I with you,’ she said, still laughing. He came to stand
beside the bed and she sat up and put her arms around his
waist. ‘I love you,’ she smiled, looking up at him. His hands
moved into her hair and she heard his breath quicken as she
ran her tongue the full length of his penis.
‘You don’t need to do that, cherie,’ he murmured, pulling
her head back.
‘But I want to,’ she answered, and lowering her mouth to
his testicles, she took them between her lips and started to
suck gently. She had never done anything like this before, it
had never even occurred to her, but now it seemed the most
natural thing in the world, and when she finally looked up at
Francois’ face she could see what an effect it was having on
him… But he had a similar surprise in store for her, and it
was almost midday by the time they finally left the bed.
When she joined him an hour later in the sitting-room, he
was sitting at the table reading that morning’s newspaper.
She sensed immediately that his mood had changed, and
when he looked up she saw the deep frown between his
eyes. She made to kiss him, but he turned his head so that
her lips connected with his cheek. Panic flashed through
her; she was afraid that even now, after all that had
happened between them, he was going to push her away
again. But he saw her fear, and pulling her onto his lap,
kissed her full on the mouth.
‘I don’t know what everyone’s going to think,’ he said,
when at last he let her go. ‘We’ve been here all morning…”
‘Does it matter what everyone thinks? After all, we are
married.’
‘Yes, it does matter,’ he answered. ‘That’s why we have to
talk. That’s why we - I-was insane to run the risk of staying
in bed with you last night. I should have returned to my own
room.’
‘I should have taken a very dim view of that,’ she said,
going to sit at the other side of the table.
‘I daresay you would.’ And to her delight, he laughed. He
laughed so rarely, but when he did his whole face was
transformed.
‘Are you hungry?’ he asked.
‘Ravenous.’
‘Good. Arlette is preparing something for us now. I’ve
asked for it to be served here. I’ve also asked Corinne to
keep Louis occupied. Your father is taking the others to
Montsoreau for the day; I don’t want us disturbed while we
talk. Perhaps by the time I’ve finished you’ll understand why
our marriage has been the way it has. Why it was necessary
for me to hide my feelings, not only from you but from the
rest of the world. It is still necessary, I’m afraid. I don’t have
to hide them from you any more, but I do from everyone
else. And you must do the same.’
She had already decided that she must be pragmatic, that
she must respond calmly and reasonably to whatever he was
going to tell her, and she started now. ‘I’ll do whatever you
say. But can I ask why you’ve decided to confide in me? And
I’m not searching for compliments, only answers.’
He smiled. ‘I took the decision because now that Halunke
- that’s the code name for the man who’s been watching you
and Armand - now that he’s struck at my family you need to
know what danger you face if you stay here.’
‘#”?’
‘We’ll come to that later. For now I think it’s better if I
start at the beginning, which means going back five years to
the time when your father introduced me to espionage.’
‘My father?’ she echoed.
He nodded. ‘He’s not the diplomat you think him, I’m
afraid. He too works in Intelligence. In his case, British Intelligence, naturally. In mine, French.’
‘Papa is a spy!’ she said, hardly able to believe it.
‘For want of a better word, yes.’
‘Did Maman know?’
‘No. She died with a great many things unexplained, and
that’s something he has never been able to forgive himself
for. Which is why I’ve decided that mustn’t happen to us.
Not,’ he added quickly, ‘that you are going to die; at least not
this week.’
‘I hope that was a joke!’
He laughed, but then his face became serious again.
‘You’re facing a very real danger, Claudine. The man the
Germans have employed to ensure my commitment to them
is also waging a personal vendetta against me. Who he is,
and what is at the root of his vendetta, I haven’t yet been able
to discover. But I will, I promise you. It’s too late for this
now, but I wish to God you had listened to me before we
were married and had gone back to England as I advised. Of
course you didn’t then face the danger you do now, at least I
wasn’t aware that you did, but I still didn’t want you in my
life. I was committed to my work and wanted nothing to
disrupt it. However, your father, and my own, were
determined we should marry, as you know, even though
your father knew the risks as well as I. And I had made a
promise to my father which I couldn’t go back on.
Nevertheless, I tried everything I could to dissuade you
from marrying me - but your determination was even
greater than theirs!’ He threw her a look to which she
responded in kind. ‘So, once we were married,’ he went on
‘the only way I could see of avoiding explanations for my
absences was to keep you at a distance. Of course, I didn’t
love you then, so hurting you was much easier than it has
been since.’
‘Since when? When did you start loving me, Francois? I’d
like to know.’
‘It was the day you almost miscarried with Louis. In fact it
must have been before then, but that was when I thought,
irrationally, that you were going to die, and then I realized
how much you meant to me.’
He stopped as the door opened and Arlette brought in
their meal. Francois continued to talk as they ate, going
steadily over the past five years, what he had done, the
people he had become involved with.
It was past five o’clock and already growing dark by the
time he said, ‘So, as Erich told us last night, I have to be back
in Berlin by the end of the week. You understand now why I
have to go, and you also understand why our feelings for
each other must remain a secret from everyone. And I mean
everyone. If you ever feel the desire to confide in someone,
don’t. Not even your aunt. It is the only way I can see of
keeping you alive. If Halunke found out that I love you, he
wouldn’t hesitate to kill you. I’m very much afraid he’ll try
anyway, sooner or later - he can’t be so stupid as to think you
don’t matter to me at all.’
‘I’m afraid,’ she began, clearing her throat, ‘that Lucien
and Armand both know I’m in love with you. Come to that,
Erich knows that you’re in love with me.’
‘That doesn’t matter. Erich can be trusted. They all can,
but I still don’t want Lucien or Armand to know how I feel.
It’s simply safer that way. Lucien will be rejoining his
regiment tomorrow anyway, but Armand is still very upset
about the break-up of your affair. If he knew how I feel
about you, he might tell his mother, who might tell someone
else. And so it goes on. It’s better not to put the burden on
anyone - because that, cherie, is what it is. A burden.
However, I want to ease it for you as much as I can, which is
why I’ve spoken to Armand. I’ve asked him to take you and
Louis to America, and he has agreed. I’d like you to go,
Claudine.’
‘No.’ She shook her head firmly. ‘I don’t want to, and
even if I did, I couldn’t.’
‘Why?’
‘You know why, Francois. I can’t leave your mother and
Monique, not now Louis is …’ She paused and turned her
head away for a moment. ‘So I shall stay,’ she said. ‘Please,
don’t let’s argue about it.’
He had known that that would be her answer, so he didn’t
waste time arguing. ‘Both Armand and I guessed what you
would say,’ he said, ‘so Armand has agreed that he won’t
attempt to join the army again, but will remain here to
protect you as best he can. I’d never have asked him if there
had been anyone else, but there’s no one. And of course he
has a very real affection for Maman and Monique. And I
presume I can trust you to remain faithful to me from now
on?’ he added, with an ironic lift of his eyebrows.
The look she gave him in response was so blatantly
seductive that he stood up, walked round the table and gave
her a lingering kiss on the mouth.
‘Let’s go back to the Germans,’ she said shakily, as he