Darkness Reborn (Order of the Blade #5) (22 page)

"I don't know."

"I do." Javier walked up beside them, the black paint glistening on his chest.

Sarah looked over at him. "What?"

"They're your assignment." Javier's eyes were hooded and dark as he looked at her. "You're their guardian angel, Sarah."

Sarah frowned, shocked by his words. "Kane and Ryland? But I can have only one—"

"Not always." Javier rubbed his jaw. "An angel can be assigned to an entity, as long as it is considered a cohesive group. Like the Order."

Sarah stared at him in shock, as Kane shot to his feet. "No," he said. "We protect her. She doesn't protect us."

Ryland was staring at Sarah, a look of awe on his face. "We have a guardian angel? Sarah is our guardian angel?
Sarah?
"

"She's your angel for hope and faith," Javier said. "That's what she gives you. She gives you the ability to believe in the future. Without that, you wouldn't be able to kill all those who you kill. She gives you the ability to believe in what you do. She is the essence of your very mission."

Sarah stared at him in shock. How could she be responsible for the entire Order? But even as Javier spoke, she felt the truth of his words, and there was no way to deny the golden light. "Why did it happen?"

"Because they needed you, and you happened to be there." Javier nodded at her. "But it cost."

Sarah looked down and saw her skin was fragmented again, hundreds of microscopic tears in her skin. "It's because of the effort it took to pull them back from the edge," she said softly. "They were so far gone."

"Because you are so far gone," Javier said. He walked over to her and set his hand on her arm. His touch was cool, easing the discomfort from the cracks. "You have so little reserves left, Sarah, and the river is closed off again. You barely have enough to support them, and that's why they're crashing like this." He looked at Kane and Ryland. "If Sarah dies, the Order will disintegrate. You will be lost to the darkness. It will end, and all of you will die. What just happened is merely the start."

Kane swore as he looked at Sarah, protectiveness swirling through him. "We'll keep her safe." But even as he said the words, he felt the darkness still percolating inside him. Who was he? Her protector or her destroyer?

Javier met his gaze. "You are both, Kane. You have the potential to be either." He looked at the sun that was still rising in the sky. "And you have very few hours left to make your choice."

Kane swore and looked at Ryland. "We need the rest of the team."

Ryland nodded. "Call in the army. We're going to war."

Kane pulled out his phone and dialed Quinn. Without the blood bond, Quinn was too far away for Kane to communicate with mind-to-mind. His interim leader answered on the first ring. "We lost Jacob," Quinn said. "We got nothing out of him before he teleported. He's gone."

Kane's adrenaline kicked into an even higher gear at the news, even though it wasn't unexpected. "Quinn. We need the team." He looked across the room at Sarah. "You need to be prepared to kill me."

Protest flared in Sarah's eyes, along with a grim reality. Who was Kane, and what was going to happen to him when the sun went down?

No one knew.

They had to be prepared for anything.

The Order of the Blade invaded the village like ancient warriors descending upon Akara either to destroy it, or to save it.

Ryland's hand was tight on Sarah's arm as Kane materialized by the old fountain with seven massive warriors clothed in leather and steel. They were well-muscled, and their faces were grim with readiness for battle. They were like the Calydons who haunted her woods, the ones that had been hunting her for so long, only these men carried with them the wisdom, focus and skills from centuries of battle. These were the men she was supposed to protect? These were the men counting on
her
?

Along with the men were three women, who Ryland had explained were the
shevas
of three of the Order members. Two of the women had dark hair and silver eyes, and were clearly sisters. The other woman had white blond hair, and she was wearing pressed jeans and a tank top. She had a computer with her and was reading the screen even as she materialized with the rest of the team.

The moment they were all present, Kane broke away from the group and walked over to Sarah. He exchanged a long look with Ryland, who grudgingly released his grip on her arm, but he didn't move away from her side. Kane's eyes were dark and turbulent, and she could feel the growing restlessness in him.
It's getting worse, isn't it?

Kane nodded as he set his arm around her shoulders and pulled her close, staking his claim on her in front of all the others.
Each time I pass through shadows, it gets worse.
His voice was grim, his body was tense.
Darkness accentuates it, and that's never happened to me before.

Sarah looked at the sun, still high in the sky.
So, tonight...

Kane tightened his grip on her.
Tonight we will know.

Sarah looked down at his hand gripping her shoulder so securely, at the raw strength in his forearm as it was draped over her shoulder. At his brand gleaming so defiantly on his skin. Would he be wielding that on her behalf, or against her, once the sun went down? Her stomach churned, and she set her hand on her belly, on the life she was supposed to protect once again. Who was she supposed to trust this time?
Who?

"Most of you have met Sarah before," Kane said, his voice calm and powerful, not revealing any of the torment he'd shared with her.

"She's our angel," Ryland said. He already had his machete in his hands. "It's our duty to protect her."

A muscular blond male stepped forward. He had to be close to seven feet tall, and his blue eyes were stark and radiant in his angular face. Then, to Sarah's shock, he went down on one knee before her and bowed his head. "Sarah Burns," he said. "My name is Gideon Roarke. We are in your debt for all you have done for us. We will keep you safe. You have our word."

Then, the rest of the warriors all followed suit, and Sarah was shocked to see all of them down on one knee, their heads bowed. After a lifetime of having Calydons hunting her ruthlessly, of having to fear every one of them, of having each of them turn on her, it was overwhelming to receive that kind of response, that kind of promise. Tears filled her eyes as Kane tugged her closer and pressed his lips to her head.
It's different now, sweetheart. You don't have to fight this battle by yourself anymore.

Sarah felt Kane's warmth pulsing at her, and she looked up at him. There was so much possessiveness and protection in his expression that she wanted to melt right into his arms.
You can't be Los Muerte,
she said.
You can't turn against me. I don't understand how you could.

Kane's face darkened, and he spread his palm over her belly. His hand was pulsing with heat that spread through her, filling her with his strength.
I will not hurt you,
he said.

But the grim resolution in his voice told her that he was willing to do whatever it took to make sure that happened, even if it meant having his team take him down.

The team wasn't there simply to take on Luc. They were there to kill Kane if that needed to happen. They were there to assassinate the father of her baby, if it became necessary. What kind of sacrifice was that? A father killing himself to protect his own child? The mere fact Kane was willing to do it told her everything she needed to know. She locked her hand around his, and shook her head as fierce denial roared through her. "No," she said. "You aren't that man." She turned to the team, who was still kneeling. "Don't kill Kane," she said. "Luc is the one who is the problem."

Seven impassive faces stared back at her, and not one gave her reassurance.

And suddenly, the brightly lit clearing seemed fraught with tension and doom. What had she done by allowing Kane to bring these warriors here? They didn't understand about everything that was important in life. They didn't understand about believing in people, about hope and faith. The hope and faith she gave them was so they could slaughter others in the name of the greater good. What kind of hope and faith was that? That wasn't what she was really about!

"So, hi." The woman with the computer stepped forward, breaking the tension with a warm smile. She held out her hand. "My name is Lily Davenport. I've got a bit of expertise regarding Calydons, so they brought me along for my mind." She winked. "Not my body. No one ever notices my body."

"No one better notice your body except me," Gideon growled. "Or I'll carve out his eyes."

At first Sarah was startled by the exchange, but when relief rippled through the team, she realized it had simply been teasing banter designed to cut the tension. Everyone rose to their feet as the low murmur of male conversation began to hum through the air as the men figured out their plans for the attack.

"Sarah," Lily said, patting her arm, giving her another friendly smile. "How are you doing?"

Sarah blinked, wanting to follow the conversation with the men. "Um, I'm..." She glanced over at Kane and Ryland, who were huddled down with the team. "I need to—"

"You need girl talk for a minute," one of the other women said as she walked up. She smiled. "My name is Grace, and this is my sister, Ana."

Sarah managed a distracted smile. "Hi, but I need to—"

"Sarah." Lily's voice was firm, jerking Sarah's attention back to her. "We have all managed to successfully bond with males who were destined to kill us. You might want to take a moment to chat before heading out into those woods."

Sarah stared at Lily, and in her moss-green eyes, Sarah saw compassion and understanding of such depth that her throat tightened. She looked at the other two women and saw similar expressions of warmth on their faces. Suddenly, she realized she was not standing in the company of strangers. She'd been blessed with the friendship of women who knew what it was to suffer and had somehow found their way out.

They were the ones who understood about hope and faith. They were the angels sent for Sarah. A huge weight seemed to lift off her shoulders, a realization that she wasn't alone. Not anymore. That there was someone out there who understood what she was going through. Tears welled up in her eyes, and for a moment, she couldn't talk.

Lily immediately threw her arms around Sarah and hugged her. "It's hell to love these men, Sarah," she said quietly. "But the only way to make it work is to believe in them, even when they don't believe in themselves."

Sarah pulled back, her heart aching as she looked at the three women standing around her. "My first soul mate murdered our daughter," she said. "And Kane murdered his first soul mate and their son. And now I'm pregnant, and his scars have disappeared." Her hands began to shake again, violently this time, as she put into words the facts that damned both of them. "I believed in my first soul mate, and I was wrong. How do I do it again? What if I'm wrong again?"

Grace's silver eyes were watching her steadily, and there was compassion in them. "Screw the past, Sarah. You can't change it, and no one has to be bound by it. You own your life today, and so does Kane. You can't be bound by what happened before. Don't use that as an excuse to roll over and give up."

Sarah stiffened. "I'm not, but I have a baby that I need to protect. That changes things."

"It sure does," Lily said with a grin. "It means we get to see what the men look like when they're trying to change a diaper. Can you imagine? I can't wait to see it."

Sarah stared at Lily, not understanding how she could joke. "But—"

Lily slung her arm over Sarah's shoulder. "You have two choices, Sarah. Laugh or cry. Laughing is always better. It helps you see things more clearly."

She stared at Lily, trying to understand. "But—"

Ana stepped forward. There was so much suffering in her eyes that Sarah's powers began to simmer in response, wanting to protect the woman before her. "Sarah," she said. "Elijah had a terrible, terrible past when I met him. There was so little left of the warrior he once was, and he had so little faith in himself. He couldn't even trust his own mind."

Sarah frowned. "That's like what happens here, when the darkness consumes the men. They do things they wouldn't normally do." She looked over at Kane, who was drawing in the dirt with a stick, sketching out the woods to his team. Her heart warmed as she watched him talking intensely. He was so handsome, so powerful, radiating a strength that seemed to always wrap around her and keep her safe. He looked up and caught her staring, and flashed her a quick smile that went straight to her heart. "I know he'd never kill me or our baby if he had a choice. I know that. But he might not be Kane anymore once the night comes."

"Sarah." Ana took her hand, drawing Sarah's attention back to her. "Do you see the warrior on Kane's right? The one with the scars on his face around his eyes?"

Sarah looked back over at the men and saw the warrior Ana was talking about. His body was heavily muscled, but he was leaner than the others, and scars covered his body. Not the artistic designs that Kane used to have. These were battle scars, indicative of a body torn apart by violence. As she watched him, she noticed that every couple seconds, he looked over at Ana, as if needing to reassure himself that she was still there and still okay. Her heart tightened at his evident need to connect with his woman, at his complete acceptance of his stark need for his woman. "I see him. He loves you, doesn't he?"

"Beyond what words could ever express. That's Elijah Ross, my soul mate." Ana smiled at him, and Elijah's face softened with such love and affection before he turned his attention back to Kane. "The scars around his eyes were self-inflicted, because he was trying to stop himself from seeing the nightmares that were turning him into a monster."

"Oh," Sarah said. "I'm so sorry—"

"No." Ana shook her head. "There's no place for pity, Sarah. I told you that so you could look at Elijah and see a man who completely lost his sanity to the extent that he killed people he loved."

Sarah looked sharply at Ana. "He did?"

"He did." Ana looked across the clearing at Elijah, and he looked up again, smiling when he saw her watching him. "There were times when I was the only one who believed in him, but I was right." She looked at Sarah. "You're Kane's soul mate, Sarah. You're always right."

"I wasn't right about Mason."

Ana lifted her eyebrows. "I disagree. I bet you were dead right about him, and you just weren't listening to your gut at the time. I think you knew all along that you couldn't trust him. You had to have known." She ran her hand over Elijah's brand that was on her forearm. "The bond is incredibly powerful. It connects us to our mates in ways we can't even imagine."

Sarah bit her lip as she watched Kane and the others talking, trying to think back to the night with Mason. To the moment when she made the choice to go to him instead of running to her daughter to protect her. Again and again, she'd run that night through her mind, trying to determine if she'd missed some sign that she should have seen that would have told her what he was capable of, but again, she saw nothing. "How could I have known in my heart that he was going to kill my daughter, and ignored it?" She looked at Ana. "There's nothing more powerful than a mother's instinct to protect her child. If there was
any
sign I was wrong to believe in Mason, I would have heeded it. That's how it works, Ana."

Ana met her gaze. "Or maybe you don't want to admit you failed to listen to the truth that you knew what Mason was like in your gut, that you ignored evidence that cost your daughter her life."

Sarah gasped, shocked by Ana's words. Grace grimaced, and Lily sucked in her breath. "Ana, don't push Sarah like that—"

"No." Ana spun toward her, her eyes blazing with challenge. "I love Elijah more than words can express, and if Sarah is the one responsible for giving him the hope that had brought him out of that awful spiral, then as God is my witness, I'm not going to let her screw it up by being afraid to face things."

Anger fired up inside Sarah. "I know I made a mistake," she shot back. "I live with that every minute of my life, the truth that I made the wrong choice and it wound up killing my daughter. Don't
ever
accuse me of not facing that—"

"I'm not," Ana said. "I can see the guilt in your eyes, and I feel your suffering. But what you're not facing is the fact that there were signs all along that you refused to see because you
wanted
the fairytale of the man loving you. You wanted to be loved, and I know that because I wanted it, too. We all do!"

Grace set her hand on Ana's arm. "Ana, I don't think this is the time—"

"It is the time," Ana snapped. "Because Sarah is about to go in there and has to make the right choice about who Kane really is. She has to have the courage to see with her heart and not to have her perception distorted by her fears, her desires or her needs." She faced Sarah. "Lily told us what you're going to be facing in there, Sarah. You're the anchor for this whole team, and if you can't find the truth in your heart and see it, then none of the men will be able to either." She shook her head, gripping Sarah's hand fiercely. "We all have so much to lose if the Order goes down," she said. "Not just the protection of innocents at large and the very foundation of what they represent, but the man I love with every fiber of my being is going into those woods to help you, Sarah, and to end the creation of all these rogue Calydons, and you're it, Sarah. You're the glue holding all of them together."