Death Wish (14 page)

Read Death Wish Online

Authors: Lindsey Menges

Tags: #Fiction & Literature

Wish 18

We trail after Darian down the dimly lit hallway. There is a musty smell in the air, and damp spots collect along the stone walls. The chill of being in underground caves sinks into my skin, and I’m glad for the cardigan
—borrowed from Harrison this morning—wrapped around me.
Silence has descended over our small group. The only sound is the steady
drip, drip
of water drops falling from the stalactites above our heads. We take multiple turns and the walkway dips up and down; at times we are walking up an incline, and other times I am doing my best not to fall forward as we move down the steep path into further darkness. Finally, I decide to break the silence.
“So,” I call to Darian, who still moves a few feet ahead of me and Robin, “where exactly are we? And where are we heading? Your main headquarters, maybe?”
Darian scoffs and stops, turning around to wait while Robin and I catch up.
“I am willing to hear what you have to say,” he says when we reach him. Even though we are the same height, the confidence and power that emanates from him makes it seem like he towers over me. “But that doesn’t mean that I’m an idiot. From the answers you gave to my questions in the other room, I think that you have real Revolutionary potential.
But
the
only
reason you’ve gotten this far is because Agent Sun vouched for you. I’m going to need to learn more about you before making any decisions on your status with our organization here, Miss Hayworth. And if I find you lacking in
any
way, I will expel you from the premises.”
And make sure you can’t tell anyone about what we’re doing
. The threat may be unspoken, but it’s there.
I figured that they wouldn’t just let me waltz in—actually, it would be idiotic of them if they did—but this still seems too easy.
“Well,” I say, crossing my arms and staring back at him, “if you’re going to make threats,
Mr. Darian
, at least make them effective ones.”
He quirks an eyebrow in amusement, clearly not taking me seriously. I continue.
“You say you’ll expel me from the premises, but what’s to stop me from coming back here with an elite group of Security Branch agents?”
It’s an empty threat, as I don’t know how I would get a hold of the government’s shadowy law enforcers, but he doesn’t need to know that.
He laughs. I flush, and he gestures to the cavern surrounding us.
“I don’t think that will be an issue, Miss Hayworth. You were knocked out by my associate, and you have no idea where we are. Sure, you may have been paying attention to the route we’ve taken while walking, but you don’t know how close or far that first room is from the alleyway where we took you.” I prickle in embarrassment. Darian turns back around, and we continue our journey.
He’s completely right. And actually, I’ve been so preoccupied with the events of the past hour that I haven’t been paying much attention to my surroundings. If I chose to run now, it would take a long time for me to find my way back, and they could catch up to me easily. Besides, knowing that they killed those two people without removing Life Chips makes me unwilling to try anything risky. I keep my eyes on my surroundings while we continue our walk, but I know that I won’t be making any escape attempts any time soon.
What the hell was I thinking, coming along with these people? I don’t even know what their true purpose is. Robin says that they want to bring natural death back into existence, but for all I know I’m walking into an elaborate crime den. Confronting Robin and getting myself into this situation is the stupidest thing I’ve ever done.
But I would probably do it again
.
The sudden, errant thought catches me off guard and I pause. Robin looks back at me. I shake my head and continue walking, but my mind is racing.
Would I do it all over again?
Maybe if I had the chance to start over, I wouldn’t get knocked unconscious by James. I would also come into this situation with an truly effective escape plan to threaten Darian with. An air of false bravado and my hand-to-hand combat skills are my only weapons right now, and that isn’t comforting in this intimidating setting.
But would I still entertain the thought of joining this organization? Would I still consider turning my back on the way I’ve been living my life for the past six years?
As crazy as it seems, I really do think I would. And the biggest reason for that is because of what Robin said in the café.
“You wanted to know why I did what I did? It’s because I want to eliminate the pain of the Jennys and Richards of this world. Pain that does nothing. Pain that only results in agony and death.”
Seeing a woman as sweet and kindhearted as Jenny have to endure a Wish as cruel as she did broke something inside of me. I had a similar experience when I first became a Godmother, but I got through it by convincing myself that the pain I went through brought that client a final bit of happiness. I pushed my pain and terror deep down, locking them away, and convinced myself that what I went through was worth it. But when you have to look into the eyes of someone breaking under a painful weight they shouldn’t have to bear, that changes things. No longer can you spout off something philosophical; you are dealing with real, raw, heartbreaking pain, and to provide any justification for it is insensitive and cruel. So when I saw Jenny trying to deal with what had happened to her, it changed things. Suddenly, I didn’t want to be a part of an organization that justifies torture and cruelty of that magnitude.
And when Robin said that she wanted to eliminate unnecessary pain, I was struck by a realization. That is
all
I’ve ever wanted to do. A desire to provide happiness and remove heartache is why I joined the Fairy Godparents, and the reason I haven’t yet turned in this rebel group is because those desires still burn strong inside of me. During my time as a Godmother I have seen far too much pain created without happiness. I tried to ignore it, tried to forget it, tried to justify it. But I can’t be willingly blind anymore.
The current way of doing things doesn’t work.
Maybe bringing back the unavoidable, natural death of the Old World will.

*

After another ten minutes of walking through stone pathways in silence, Darian finally stops. We have been walking for such a long time. I wouldn’t be surprised that, even if we
initially
started our journey in the city, we have moved to the underground area of a completely new city all together. Or maybe Darian has led us in circles, doing everything he can to confuse me so I can’t remember our route.
He turns around and gestures to his left. I move forward. He’s motioning me through an opening in the stone. I hesitate, having never been a fan of small spaces, but when I remember that there’s nowhere else for me to go I swallow my nerves and move through.
It’s a tight fit—I have to turn sideways to inch my way forward—but after a few feet it widens into a small, makeshift room. At the center of the area there are a half-dozen chairs seated in a semi-circle, and at their feet in the middle I see the round shape of a hologram projector.
“Miss Eliza Hayworth, please have a seat,” says Darian from behind me. He’s emerged from the stone entrance I just squeezed through with Robin right behind him. She gives me a small, encouraging smile, and moves forward to sit in one of the chairs. She pats the seat of the one next to her invitingly and I sit down. She is clearly excited by the prospect of me joining their group. The lights dim and the projector whirs to life as Darian begins speaking.
“This is the planet Earth,” he lectures, and an image of our world appears in front of our eyes. A small section, no more than an eighth of Earth’s land, lights up in red. “This area, highlighted on the hologram, is our country.”
I’m surprised. Even though I’ve never left the country, I never realized how small it was in comparison to everything else.
“What no citizens know, and what the government has made every effort to keep secret,” intones Darian in an ominous voice, “is that our country is the only one with Life Chips. We are the only people on this planet with limitless lifespans.”

*

A sputtering noise comes out of my throat.
“What?” There is no way I heard him correctly. Robin said something similar when I caught her, but I immediately dismissed her words as attempts to confuse me so she could escape.
“That can’t be right,” I insist. “How can we be the only people with Life Chips? I thought this technology belonged to everyone.”
I think Darian shakes his head, but the slightly-transparent image of Earth between us distorts my view of him.
“I think that, when the designers first created them, that was their original intent. But by the time the Chips were installed in everyone at birth, the supply was kept solely for the richest nation in the world: ours.”
“That’s horrible…” I whisper. But Robin shakes her head.
“Actually,” she says, turning in her chair to look at me, “that’s a really good thing. Sure, it seems selfish, and it is, but if everyone in the world had a Life Chip, our species would cease to exist.”
Darian nods, and the hologram changes: now there is a bar graph floating in the air in front of us. I have no idea what it’s charting. Fortunately, he explains.
“This graph shows the consumption rate of natural resources per nation. These resources include food, fuel, water—basically, everything we take from the Earth in order to survive. As you can see,” he says, moving around to our side of the projection and pointing to the bar on the far left, “this bar right here, which represents our country, shows that we consume an alarmingly higher rate of resources than the rest of the world.”
He’s right; our bar is easily ten times the height of the other ones. Darian continues speaking while I examine the graph.
“You heard Agent Sun say that it’s a good thing we’re the only ones with Life Chips, and she’s exactly right. Because our society has utilized Life Chips, the mortality rate of our country has dramatically changed for the worst.”
The hologram changes to another picture; this time it’s a line graph, but I still can’t follow the pattern displayed.
“Don’t worry about the exact numbers. The Chief will explain them,” whispers Robin. I smile slightly
—she’s
been through this same presentation.
“I don’t know if Agent Sun mentioned this to you or not,” the older man continues, “but in the Old World the rates of birth and death were fairly equal. The exact rates from country to country would vary, but despite differing numbers the world population stayed relatively consistent. But, as medical technology improved, longevity increased and the birth rate began to outnumber the death rates.

However, while some felt concern over the pattern, the world was still okay. But with the introduction of Life Chips to our populace, the birth rate outnumbers the death rate twenty to one. That means that for every one person who decides to submit a Death Wish, twenty new lives are brought into this world. That’s why our country consumes so much of the world’s resources; our population is increasing at an alarming rate, and we therefore need to use more energy. Unfortunately, this harms the populations of other countries.”
A series of images begin flipping through on the hologram, and I let out an involuntary moan of pain when I see them. Conditions of terrible poverty and emaciated bodies float past. Tears well in my eyes when I see the starving body of a child who can’t be more than five. I hear a sniffle beside me; even though she’s seen them already, they still have a powerful effect on Robin. I’m shocked by the sight of starving people, rotting animal carcasses, and the other horrifying results of disease and poverty. I didn’t realize how coddled I am in my life, how coddled everyone in this country is, and what terrible conditions exist in the rest of the world. I am overwhelmed with guilt; how can we live with ourselves, sucking the life from this planet at the cost of everyone else?
The last image flickers above us— a mother feeding her five children from a small pot of stew—and the hologram projector flicks off. Darian pulls one of the chairs from the semicircle and moves it in front of us, sitting down and looking at me.
“Miss Hayworth, we cannot allow our world to continue in this state. But we cannot randomly kill people either. As you put it so wonderfully earlier, something needs to change. And both myself and the people who work for me believe that, to change our world, we need an equalizer. Some phenomenon that affects everyone and does not discern between rich and poor. Simply put, we want to bring back death so that our world may live.”
He extends his hand to me, and I want to turn away from his piercing gaze.
“Miss Hayworth, will you help us? Will you join the Revolutionaries?”

Wish 19

“Miss Hayworth, will you help us? Will you join the Revolutionaries?”
Do I want to join the Revolutionaries? Do I want to work undercover, alongside Robin and these mysterious strangers, to bring back all-encompassing death? Do I want to finally turn my back on everything I’ve known and embrace this new life?
I know my answer before Darian finishes the question. I look up, stare straight at him, and say in a stern voice:
“No.”

*

“What?” Robin shouts beside me, jumping to her feet to protest. Darian drops his hand but says nothing, just gives me a cold look. I hold up my hand to stop any further conversation and elaborate.
“Let me explain,” I say, standing and crossing my arms over my chest. “My reasons for saying no aren’t what you think.”
“Then what are they?” There is a definite whine to Robin’s voice. “‘Liza, I thought you’d join us. I thought you supported this!”
I break my staring contest with Darian to look at her. She looks so upset; my response is not at all what she was expecting. I want to reassure her, but I need to be firm in what I say next so I hold back. Instead I hold my hand up again, and she falls silent. Funny. E
v
en though she was never truly a Godparent, I think a small part of her still sees me as her mentor.
“Look,” I continue, keeping my tone cool, “I agree with everything both of you have said to me. I don’t think Godparents should have to suffer through every cruel whim our clients come up with for their Wish. I don’t think the government should have a hand in tearing families apart. And I
certainly
don’t think people in the rest of the world should suffer so horribly so we can live limitless, comfortable lives. I agree with you reasons and your philosophy; hell, I’m even finding myself agree with your group’s endgame of universal death.”
I stare at Darian now, my blue eyes boring into his golden ones.
“But I do
not
agree with your methods. Those two people whose Life Chips you stopped, the Smiths? You ended their lives without any warning, and they had no idea they were about to die. That is
not okay
. I agree with bringing back death, but I don’t agree with random killings. If I am to be a part of this, everyone in our country will need to
know
that they can die. Otherwise, all of you are no better, and I would say even
worse
, than the Fairy Godparents that you claim to hate so much.”
I stop, flushed and out of breath. Without realizing it, I poured a lot of passion into that speech, and my last words echo in the stony cavern. Robin is silent, taken aback by how vehemently I argued my case. I expect Darian to still be looking at me without expression, but I am surprised. He’s smiling. He lets out a huge breath with a
whoosh
of air and sits back down in his chair.
“I’m so glad you said that, Miss Hayworth,” he finally says with a laugh, sounding relieved. It’s a pleasant rumble of a laugh, and the action seems to take years off of his face. “I wouldn’t want anyone who’s okay with callous murder to be a part of my resistance.”
I let out a disbelieving noise and he looks up. No longer is he smiling or laughing. Instead, he looks weary.
“It’s true,” he insists, and he motions to the chairs behind me. “Please, sit back down. There’s a lot to discuss.”
I want to refuse, but I still don’t know how to get out of here. I sigh and sit down; my priority is survival, and if obeying this man for now is what that takes to stay alive then I’ll do it. Robin hesitates, but then she sits down too. Darian looks back up at us and his eyes are filled with remorse.
“Joel and Beverly Smith weren’t supposed to die. We’ve been collecting information on the Life Chips for a long time, and have been trying to find a way to disconnect the Chips without killing the individual. After all of our research, we believed that we’d finally found a way to eliminate the signals of the Life Chips without causing the organs to shut down.” Now he looks down at his knees, where his hands are balled into tight fists. “We were so
certain
, and every bit of information we’d gleaned pointed to the Smiths surviving the process. But a minute after we disconnected their Chips, they died.” He looks up, and he has such a tortured look on his face that I feel a pang of sympathy in my chest. He must still be carrying the weight of their deaths on his shoulders.
“We need you, Eliza,” he says. “We need someone who has been inside the Organization for a long time. We sent in Robin but, while she
has
done a wonderful job gathering information, we need the expertise of a seasoned Godparent.”
My eyes widen; I am shocked by his sudden confession. When I first came here I thought that, to them, I was nothing more than a potential new recruit. But with this new information, he’s revealed that they need me more than I need them.
And I can use that to bargain.
It takes all my energy not to smile. I won’t have to simply bend to the wills of these Revolutionaries. Instead, I think that I will be able to use my position to help sway decisions.
And I will do everything I can to make sure no one else gets hurt.
“Alright,” I say, and Darian looks at me hopefully. This feels weird; he must be much older than me, but he’s looking at me with such respect that I almost feel like I’m the leader here. I clear my throat and continue.
“Alright,” I repeat, “but I have some conditions. Like I said earlier, I agree with your philosophy, and I want to be a part of what you’re trying to accomplish. I will help you gather information on the Life Chips in order to figure out how to deactivate them without killing people. But when we have perfected the technique, when we have a foolproof solution, we will tell everyone when the Chips are deactivated. I want everyone to know that they can die. No surprises, no shocks, no sudden deaths. Everyone in our country needs to know so that they can alter their lives accordingly.”
Darian nods, and I glance over at Robin. She is smiling, but I still have a bit more to say.
“Also, I am not a full member. Think of me as a consultant. I will still be performing my Godmother duties, mainly so that no suspicion is cast upon me or the people I love, but also because I still believe it’s the right thing to do. Until death is brought back, the Wish system is what we need. I will gather as much information on the Chips as I can and I will report it to you. But, until then, I will continue bringing peace to people through their Death Wishes.”
Darian nods again, but when I look at Robin I see that her expression has deflated a bit. But she exhales, gives her head a small shake, and looks at me with a smile.
“Well, I was hoping you’d give up the Godmother business, but I guess you do have a point. You’re one of the most well-known Godparents, so it would draw too much attention if you suddenly disappeared.”
I look back at Darian. He’s extended his hand to me again. This time I take it.
“Agreed. We look forward to working with you, Consultant Hayworth.”

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