Deception (27 page)

Clay picked up the stick and stabbed it into the ground. “I love her, Connor, but I can’t go the rest of my life living alone because that’s what she approves of. I’ll do everything I can to make her well and happy. But she has to want some of that for me.”

Connor nodded. She smoothed his freshly shaven cheeks with her hand. “We’ll work it out. Clay, my love for you is so strong that I think we’ll be able to overcome anything together.”

“We haven’t really talked about Washington. I should give you an idea what that’s going to be like during the campaign, and if I win.” He looked away, distress in his eyes. “I’m worried that it’s going to be like a prison for you. You’re so free, so confident in who you are. The people, the voters, expect a certain image. They’re not willing to look deep inside a person to know if they’re really good or not. They want a package, something they can identify with without thinking.”

Connor had given this a lot of thought. “I don’t know how I’ll take to political life,” she answered slowly. “I promise you that if it looks like I’m going to be a drawback, I’ll leave. I won’t jeopardize your future, Clay. I love you too much for that.”

Clay turned her face to look directly into his. “It’s funny, but since I’ve come to know you, the election doesn’t seem so important. When I’m at the office or planning a meeting, I think about you and how much I’d rather be here, with you.”

“As long as I know that, I think I can manage anything.” Connor leaned forward and kissed him on the lips, a kiss of tenderness.

The sound of childish laughter made them turn to look down the shell drive. Renata and Danny came around the curve. Danny was carrying a large saw.

Clay pointed back at the map. “You’d better have an idea where a good tree is. These kids are ready to chop.”

Connor studied the crude map. She thought back over the hundreds of times she’d been along the trails. The woods were dotted with cedars, but they wanted a perfect one, at least twelve feet tall. Where had she seen one?

“Maybe here.” She pointed along the perimeter. “There are several big ones and a bunch of little ones. The area has some glades, so maybe we’ll find one that hasn’t been severely crowded.”

“Look here, kids,” Clay called them over. “Connor says there are trees here.”

Renata took the stick from his hand. “That’s a good place. When Danny and I were riding yesterday, our friend showed us a perfect tree. It’s right there.” She pointed to a spot with the stick. “I know exactly where it is.”

“Then let’s hit the trail,” Clay said, taking the saw from Danny. “Maybe we’ll get lucky and meet this great friend of yours.” He pulled Renata’s hat off to her shrieks of merriment.

Renata jumped up and grabbed her hat. She pulled it down on her head and looked at Connor, then Clay. “No, she won’t come out, but she’ll be watching. She doesn’t like Connor at all. I think she hates her.”

Grabbing Danny’s hat, Renata ran ahead, laughing as Danny set out to chase her down.

Renata and Danny clapped as Clay put the angel on the top of the tree. “Plug it in, Connor,” Renata called. “Plug it in.”

Sitting cross-legged on the floor, waiting for the command, Connor did just that. The tree burst into red, yellow, blue, and green light, with a few modern pinks and oranges thrown in among the older bulbs.

“It’s the most beautiful tree I’ve ever seen,” Connor said. Although it lacked the expense and artistry of a “theme” tree, the huge cedar was decked with family heirloom ornaments and the old multicolored lights that neither blinked nor twinkled. Loops of popcorn and cranberries—strung for several nights in a row under Willene’s tutelage—adorned the limbs, and icicles hung in silvery profusion over the twelve-foot length of the enormous tree. It was an old-fashioned tree created out of memories and laughter. Connor felt tears threaten as Clay beamed down at her from the ladder where he stood. It was such a pleasure to be with Clay, to be with his family.

“I’m glad Daddy finally put the angel on,” Renata said, rolling her eyes at her father.

He laughed as he climbed down. “Little Miss Impatience. I said I’d get her up there before Christmas.”

Renata looked at her watch. “Four
hours
before Christmas!”

Clay laughed out loud, picking Renata up and holding her high in the air above him. “I pity the man who falls short of your sense of timing,” he said, shaking her until she was forced to laugh. “Have you no compassion for the poor, feeble male creature? We toil, we sweat, and never do we sleep.”

Connor and Danny joined in the laughter. Clay had Renata completely captured. The young girl had been upset at the idea that Connor was going to share their Christmas Eve with them, but Clay had pulled her aside for a brief chat, and he’d worked hard to show her she was always the apple of his eye.

“I’m not nearly as accomplished as Willene, but I might be persuaded to try and make some hot chocolate if Clay would consider bringing in more wood for the fire,” Connor said to a chorus of pleas. With a grin she headed for the kitchen.

Willene had prepared a cold supper and gone home. The turkey was roasting slowly in the oven, something Connor would check on regularly, and Willene would return at daybreak to finish cooking the big meal. Clay had tried to convince her to stay home, but Willene wouldn’t hear of it. She insisted that she’d rather be at Oaklawn, making sure her two precious children had the proper feast.

Sally had gone home in the early afternoon, near tears when Jeff had declined her family’s invitation for Christmas dinner. Jeff himself had gone to New Orleans to celebrate. Clay had given him two weeks of holiday time, and Jeff had definite plans about where he wanted to spend it. All who remained at Oaklawn were the Sumners and Connor. Clay had invited his brother out to the house for dinner, but Harlan had declined.

The smell of the slowly roasting turkey made Connor’s mouth water, even though she had eaten only a few hours before. As she got out the heavy saucepan, she hoped that Harlan’s reticence in coming to Oaklawn wasn’t because of her, but on the other hand, she didn’t really care. Harlan was no friend of hers—or his brother, as far as she could tell. It would be far more pleasant if it was just the four of them.

She got out the chocolate and the sugar and the mugs and did her best to render the mixture in the same proportions Willene used. It was impossible to get any recipies from the cook—she never measured and she never wrote anything down. She cooked by experience and intuition. Connor had little practice at using either in the kitchen.

Putting the filled mugs on a tray, she dropped marsh-mallows in each cup and headed back to the den, where the tree stood before one of the large, floor-to-ceiling windows. There was also a wreath on the door, and the porch columns had been wrapped candy-cane fashion in red plastic. Red and white poinsettias were banked on either side of the fireplace, where beautifully cross-stitched stockings were hung for all three Sumners. Clay had insisted on hanging a stocking for Connor, so a new red one for her had been purchased. Magnolia leaves and holly were laced across the top of the mantle, along with several brightly burning candles. For once even the mirrors seemed warm.

The house was festive. Connor patted her top pocket. She’d found a snatch of mistletoe just within reach when she’d gone riding the day before. She intended to hang it over her bed before Clay got there.

But first they had to open their presents. Clay had explained that it was tradition at Oaklawn to open gifts from each other on Christmas Eve. Then Santa Claus came during the night. The “split” celebration had originated when Clay’s parents and Talla were alive. It had allowed the children to celebrate with each set of grandparents. Clay had explained that after Talla’s death, the Bienville family had grown distant, even toward the children.

Clay brought a decanter of brandy over and poured a healthy measure in her hot chocolate. “Are we ready to celebrate?” he asked, raising his eyebrows at the children.

“Yeah!” They cried back.

“Deck the halls with boughs of holly
…” Clay started the song, and by the second line, everyone had joined in, laughing at their own attempts to stay in tune.

They made it through several other carols before Renata insisted on giving Clay her present. In a matter of moments, it was mayhem. Ribbons and paper flew, and Renata and Danny squealed and giggled. Renata put on the jacket Connor had given her and then ran to the mirror to admire herself. Danny was equally happy with the leather halter and the books on riding Connor had gotten for him.

Their gifts for her were new riding breeches in hunter green, and a cream-colored cashmere sweater. Whoever had helped them pick out the gifts had excellent taste. Connor sent Clay a questioning look, but he shrugged.

“They’re beautiful,” Connor said, delighted. “My favorite colors, and so elegant-looking.”

“What’d you get Daddy?” Renata asked.

Connor walked out to the front porch and brought in the big box.

“For me?” Clay laughed.

“Give her your present first,” Danny said.

“Well, maybe I didn’t have time to get Connor a present,” Clay said, looking down at his shoes. “I was so busy.”

“Daddy!” Renata was shocked. “You forgot Connor’s present?”

“Well, not really.” Clay reached in his pocket and brought out a tiny square jewelry case. He handed it to her.

Connor felt the throb of her heart in her chest. Her hand was trembling when she took the little case and it required all of her efforts to snap open the lid. It was not possible that Clay would so casually give her a ring. He hadn’t really even asked if she would marry him. But, of course, he didn’t have to. He already knew that she would. She forced the lid open and it took all of her training to keep her eyes focused on the gold embedded in the shiny white satin of the box.

“It’s beautiful, Clay. Really beautiful.”

“It reminded me of you.”

“Let me see!” Renata pulled at Connor’s arm until she lowered the box and revealed the ring, a beautiful emerald, twined in a delicate setting with a fiery opal and a trail of diamonds.

“It’s your birthstone, and the opal is for your nature. I had the ring made for you.” Clay spoke softly.

“It’s magnificent,” Connor said, composed enough to finally look at him. Her disappointment was not with the ring, but with her stupid, insane, ridiculous expectations. She’d seen a ring box and immediately jumped to the wrong conclusion. Clay had never even asked her to marry him.

“Is something wrong?” Clay asked.

Connor slipped the ring out of the box and onto her finger. It was a perfect fit. “I’m just taken aback at the beauty of the ring, Clay. I’ve never owned a piece of jewelry like this.”

“Well, now for mine!” Clay tore into the gift-wrapped box with a vengeance, and when he extracted the saddle, there were shouts from him and the kids.

“This means we’re on for a ride in the morning,” Clay said, kissing Connor’s cheek.

“Yes,” Connor smiled. She’d gotten control of herself, stomped her foolish disappointment back. If Clay wanted to marry her, he’d ask properly, not trot out a ring in front of the kids and put her on the spot. She’d been an idiot to get herself so worked up.

The children opened their gifts from Clay, and gave him theirs—more riding equipment, and a beautiful blue sweater with horseheads woven into the fabric.

“Now up to bed, so Santa can come,” Clay said, picking up the gift wrap and ribbons that had been strewn all over the floor.

Connor started to work helping him gather the debris.

“Can’t we stay up?” Renata begged. “We’re old enough to know that …”

“If this has anything to do with Santa, I’d be careful. If you don’t think he’ll come, then he won’t.”

“Oh, Daddy!” Renata was exasperated. “That’s just talk!”

“I wouldn’t risk it,” Clay warned, his voice filled with teasing affection for his daughter. “Better go up to bed.”

“Let’s go.” Danny was a little more worried than Renata. He cast a look out the window to see if anyone was about.

“Danny, they’re just trying to get rid of us so they can be alone,” Renata snapped at him. “Can’t you see that?”

“Exactly right,” Clay said calmly. “And a wonderful idea, if I do say so myself.”

Renata glared at her father and started out of the room.

“I love you, Renata,” Clay said. “I’d like a goodnight kiss.”

She stopped, frozen in place. When she turned back to him, she was smiling. She ran into his arms and threw her arms around his neck. “I love you, too, Daddy.”

Danny joined them for hugs and kisses, then both children ran out of the room. Their footsteps were audible as they ran up the stairs.

“See, I told you’d they’d begin to adjust to the idea of me and you,” Clay said. “Renata’s touchy, but Danny doesn’t mind at all.”

“She’s such a … difficult child,” Connor said. “It’s like she’s balanced on a ledge. The least wind might blow her over into that terrible anger she feels. I wish there were some way to purge her of all of the pain and fury.”

“Time will help, but basically, Renata has to want to let it go. At least, that’s what all the shrinks say. And, Connor, she’s so much better. You have no idea because you didn’t see her last Christmas.” Clay hesitated. “I came down early Christmas morning to put out the Santa presents and she’d dismantled the entire tree and dragged it out the door. She said it wasn’t Christmas without Talla.”

“My God!” Connor said.

“I almost had her institutionalized, but she was so unresponsive to the doctors I was afraid it would only make her worse.”

“How did she get the tree down?”

“No one could explain that, and there wasn’t anyone else on the grounds to help her. Sometimes a person who’s disturbed can have almost supernatural strength.”

“I’ve heard that,” Connor recalled. She gathered up the mugs and stacked them on the tray. The room was tidy again. All the presents were under the tree, except her ring. She felt it on her finger.

“So you see, she is much, much better. If she continues at this rate, I’m hoping she’ll agree to see another psychologist, maybe to speed the process.” Clay walked over to her and kissed her on the cheek. “You’ve given me so much, Connor, including my daughter’s health. I can’t imagine life without you.”