I decided to sleep with him. It would be part of my getting over Flynn. I’d hardly even kissed anyone apart from Flynn and had no idea what being with someone else would be like. Now
seemed as good a time as any to find out.
Grace and one of her friends cooked up the pizzas we’d brought with us and everyone settled in the living room to watch a horror movie and drink Freddie’s punch. Apart from a bit of
tension between James and Freddie, late afternoon turned into evening without any real drama. Leo sat, silently, in a corner. He didn’t look like he was having much fun but then Leo was
always best one-on-one, tending to lose what little confidence he had in company.
And then Dad rang. I slipped outside to take the call. It was almost nine p.m. and the sun was slowly setting behind the garage that stood across the gravel from the cottage. I stood, watching
the pinks and golds of the sky beyond the distant fields.
‘River?’ Dad sounded tense.
‘What’s up?’ I asked. I’d already had two large glasses of the punch and was feeling pleasantly mellow.
‘I’ve got some bad news.’ Dad hesitated.
My chest tightened. Was this about the baby? Dad sounded more worried than distraught. ‘What is it?’
‘Cody has been released from custody, all charges dropped,’ Dad said.
My insides seemed to shrivel up. ‘
What?
’ I sucked in my breath, shocked to my core. ‘How can they just let him go?’
‘I don’t know,’ Dad said miserably. ‘I just got the call from the police liaison person. Apparently there’s not enough evidence to prosecute.’
‘But . . . but I was
there
,’ I said. ‘I saw him shoot that man. And there must be CCTV or . . . or DNA traces too.’
‘The CCTV doesn’t show the shooting,’ Dad explained. ‘There was never any real evidence against Cody except your testimony.’
He paused and I knew he was thinking about Flynn’s failure to turn himself in.
‘What about the guys who saw us leave?’ I asked.
‘The cops can’t trace them.’
‘But . . .’ My head spun. ‘Why isn’t my word enough?’
I could hear Dad taking a deep breath. They’ve decided your evidence isn’t sufficiently strong. It’s because of what happened last year . . . you spending that week in bed not
talking, seeing the counsellor afterwards. They’re saying you’re not a reliable witness.’
‘No,’ I breathed.
‘I’m so sorry, River.’ Dad paused. ‘I’m wondering if that gangster Cody and Flynn worked for – Bentham – has got something to do with this. Maybe
he’s put pressure on someone somewhere.’
I shivered. That was exactly what Flynn had predicted.
I spoke to Dad a little more. He emphasised that the police were monitoring Cody’s movements. ‘They’ve got someone following him right now,’ he said.
I reassured him that I was fine, then I went back inside. The scene was the same as when I’d left, but now the whole party atmosphere seemed trivial and tacky. Freddie was again urging
everyone to play strip poker and, though Emmi was the only person who appeared to think this was a good idea, neither of them were shutting up about it.
Deeply regretting my earlier decision to ally myself with them and Sam, who was already drunk, I crept around the outskirts of the room, hoping no one would notice me as I headed upstairs.
I found a room and sat on the bed at its centre. It was a plain room, just a white duvet on the bed and no ornaments of any kind. It suited my bleak mood. After everything I’d been
through, to know that Cody wasn’t going to be prosecuted and sent to prison was the last straw.
I put my head in my hands. I wanted to cry, but the tears wouldn’t come, so I just sat, listening to the music and laughter that drifted up from downstairs.
‘At least you won’t have to testify in court.’ It was Leo.
I looked up. He was standing in the doorway, an expression of sympathy on his face.
‘Your dad called,’ he said, holding out his phone to explain how he’d heard the news. ‘I’m so sorry, Riv.’
I bristled. Only Flynn was allowed to call me Riv. ‘Go away.’ I could hear my voice was like ice.
Leo blinked. ‘River, I’m sorry, I thought you might want to talk.’
‘I don’t,’ I said. ‘Not to you.’
Leo gasped. I looked down, fury roiling inside me. I knew I was being desperately unfair. Cruel, in fact. It wasn’t right to take my anger out on Leo. None of this was his fault.
‘Right.’ Leo was still in the doorway. I looked up. He was gazing at me, a look of total misery on his face.
Suddenly I felt mean. Disgusted with myself. I jumped up and ran over. ‘I’m sorry, Leo. I didn’t mean that. It’s just . . .’
He put his arms around me. It was good to be held. Maybe I should sleep with Leo instead of Sam. I hugged him back.
For goodness sake.
What was I thinking? Sleeping with Leo would only hurt him more. And it wasn’t what I wanted at all. I should just be by myself.
With a sigh I pulled away.
‘This is my room,’ Leo said eagerly. ‘You can sleep here too if you like.’ He hesitated. ‘Or you can just have it.’
‘We can share it,’ I said. ‘As
friends
.’ I peered into Leo’s eyes to make sure he understood. ‘Share the bed, right, but that’s all?’
‘Okay.’ He nodded happily. ‘I’ll get your stuff from downstairs.’
‘No rush.’ I managed a smile. ‘It’s only nine o’clock.’
‘Right, yeah.’ Leo looked crestfallen.
For a second, I wondered if I was doing the right thing offering to share his room. Still, I’d made it clear nothing was going to happen.
We went back downstairs and I was instantly pleased that I wasn’t going to end up with the others in the basement or on the sofas overnight. All the punch was gone and Freddie, Emmi, Sam
and both Grace’s friends were clearly totally drunk. They were playing some ridiculous game involving imitations of farmyard animals and a bottle of tequila.
I looked at Sam. He was so off his head that his eyes were glazed over and he was staring lustfully at the shorter of Grace’s two friends. Thank goodness I’d changed my mind about
sleeping with him.
He told us with a slurred sneer that Grace and James had gone outside for a walk. Leo and I glanced at each other, then decided to go outside ourselves.
It was a mild evening and we sat on the gate of a nearby field, watching the stars slowly fill the sky as darkness fell over the countryside. We talked properly for the first time in ages.
Whatever his true feelings, at least now Leo was speaking as if we were friends.
Just
friends. He even mentioned liking a girl he’d met on his visit to his new sixth form college in
Devon. Of course, being Leo, he was quite low key about it, but I felt hopeful that it was a sign he was, perhaps, genuinely starting to move on from his crush on me.
By the time we went back inside the cottage it was past ten o’clock and properly dark. Sam and one of Grace’s friends were kissing on the sofa. Grace and James were watching TV
holding hands, with Grace’s other mate looking very disgruntled beside them. There was no sign of Emmi and Freddie. I was guessing they had disappeared downstairs, into the basement
bedroom.
Leo and I got ourselves some cold pizza from the fridge and sat at the kitchen table to eat it. After a while James and Grace joined us and we all charted together for a while.
It was nice. Yet, though I felt calmer than I had done earlier, there was still a dull, depressed weight inside me.
Leo and James and Grace were all lovely but my soul was with Flynn, wherever he was, whatever he was doing. I ached with longing to see him, to feel his kiss on my lips and his fingers gently
stroking my face, whispering how much he loved me in my ear.
I sat back with a sigh. How was I ever going to survive the rest of my life without him? Was it always going to feel like this: small and limited and dull? How could anyone else ever make me
feel alive like Flynn did?
I took my drink and wandered over to the window. It was pitch black outside, only a few lights twinkling from houses in the distance. And then my phone beeped. I glanced at it, assuming it was
from Dad, with some sort of update on the Cody situation.
But it was from Flynn.
I stared at my phone, reading and rereading the text.
It’s me. I’m outside. I need to speak to you. Please come. After everything I wouldn’t ask if it wasn’t important. Fx
Flynn was here?
Outside?
I couldn’t believe it, and yet the text was from the number he’d given me,
his
phone. I peered through the window again. It was pitch black outside, just the light from the
house casting spooky shadows across the gravel. There was no sign of anyone out there. Anxiety crawled across my skin, making me shiver.
‘Is everything all right?’ Leo asked from across the kitchen.
I turned to face him, but I barely saw him. My heart was thundering in my ears.
‘It’s fine,’ I said, forcing a smile on to my face. ‘I just need some air.’
‘And some company?’ Leo asked hopefully.
I caught Grace and James exchanging a look across the table.
‘Thanks, Leo, but no. I just want a minute outside alone.’ I sped away before he could say any more. Music was blaring out from the living room, Sam and Grace’s friend were
still making out on the sofa. They didn’t look up as I raced past to the front door. As I opened it, my phone beeped again.
I’m going away, Riv. Abroad. I just want to say goodbye. I’m in the garage. Fx
I glanced across the gravel to the garage. Light from the door I’d just opened cast a narrow path from the house, past James’s car, to the garage door. The garage itself was still in
darkness.
Why was Flynn being so mysterious? Well, the answer to that was obvious. He wouldn’t want to muscle in on the entire weekend without speaking to me alone first. He must know that he
wouldn’t really be welcomed by any of the others, not even James.
As I hesitated, the inside of the garage lit up. Light spread out like a pool from the door, illuminating the gravel beyond. A five-pointed star had been drawn in the pebbles. Flynn had drawn a
star just like that on Dad’s car window.
All my reservations about seeing him vanished. He was here, just a few metres away, waiting for me. I couldn’t turn my back.
I closed the door quietly behind me and raced across the gravel to the garage. The door was pulled shut, not properly closed. I pushed it open and peered inside.
‘Flynn?’ I whispered.
No reply.
I took another step through the door. ‘Flynn?’ I whispered again.
‘Here.’ The voice spoke in a low whisper. I turned towards its sound.
And then a dark figure loomed over me, the light went out and Cody slapped his hand over my mouth, silencing the scream that rose in my throat.
Cody dragged me backwards across the garage floor. I kicked and punched at him, but he was too strong. I tried to yell, but his gloved hand over my mouth muffled the sound. My
fingers clawed at his. Panic filled me. I couldn’t tear him away. His skin smelled of stale cigarettes, his cheek rough and cold against my face.
‘Quiet!’ he hissed. He held me tightly against him. The tough leather of his jacket pressed against my back. He dug his fist against my stomach. There was something in his hand. I
looked down, on to the barrel of a gun.
I froze.
Panting, Cody spun me around. He pointed the gun at my chest and swore.
‘You stupid, stupid bitch,’ he whispered. The venom in his voice made me shiver.
He walked me back, into the corner of the garage. I glanced around. A low shelf stood on one side of me. It was full of drills and screwdrivers and bits of wood. On the other side a black
tarpaulin lay crumpled on the floor. Cody pushed me back against the wall. It was cold through my top.
‘Flynn.’ His name slipped out of me in a sob.
‘Oh don’t you worry.’ Cody raised his gun so that the barrel rested against my neck. ‘I’m going after him too, make sure he pays for helping you run away from me.
The pair of you have ruined my life. Bentham’s cut me loose, the police are on my case.’
I stared into his mean grey eyes. ‘But you’re free,’ I stammered. ‘I don’t understand, the police dropped all charges.’
‘They’re just waiting for me to slip up again,’ Cody spat. ‘It’s
your
fault they arrested me in the first place.’
‘If . . . if you hurt me, you’ll be caught . . .’
‘Will I?’ A nasty smile curled around Cody’s lips. ‘No one knows I’m here. And this is Flynn’s gun.’
I glanced down at the pistol. ‘Flynn’s?’
Cody nodded. ‘The one he was hiding for Bentham. Didn’t he explain how it works? Bentham and people like him . . . they don’t keep their guns
with
them, they keep
people to hold them, people who have to be on standby, ready to deliver the gun where and when it’s needed at a moment’s notice.’
‘Flynn told me about that,’ I stammered. ‘He said he had done that . . . and that he’s stopped.’
‘Did he?’ Cody shrugged. ‘Well he’s back to it now. Bentham’s dumped me and given Flynn his job back. I took this gun from Flynn’s place just two hours ago
along with his phone.’ He paused. ‘That’s how I figured out about the star thing. He’d drawn your name and this address with all these stars around it, the
numpty.’
He studied my face. Desperate thoughts raced through my head. If only I could get away, back to the house, raise an alarm somehow. If only someone, Leo, would come to look for me. If only I
hadn’t said I wanted to be on my own.
‘What are you going to do?’ I stammered.
Cody moved closer until he was right in front of me, then he narrowed his cold grey eyes. ‘I don’t know what Flynn sees in you,’ he murmured.
I shivered at the sneering menace in his voice.
‘I love him,’ I said. ‘And he loves me.’
Cody shook his head. ‘Love is for idiots.’ He stroked the side of the gun up my face, pressing the metal against my temple. I froze with fear. This was it. He was going to kill
me.
‘Stop!’ The garage door slammed open.