Delayed Penalty: A Pilots Hockey Novel (15 page)

“Let’s go,” I whispered. I waved to Drew, then pointed toward the bulky, crimson curtain separating the concourse from the seating area. “We’re going to head in. See you at intermission?”

Instead of waiting for a response, I poked Aleksandr in the rib cage to prod him forward.

“ ‘See you at intermission?’ ” Aleksandr asked when we settled into the rigid red seats. “Why would you say that?”

“We can’t say hi to my friend during the first intermission?” I asked.

“Not when your friend is in love with you.”

“He’s not.” I laughed out loud as I leaned over, setting my purse at my feet. “He’s here with a girl.”

Aleksandr shook his head and turned to watch the Red Wings and their opponent, the Chicago Blackhawks, skating around their respective nets.

I loved watching to see if any players had superstitions, like tapping the goalie’s pads or the crossbar of the net.

“Do you have any pregame superstitions?” I asked, sliding my hand under Aleksandr’s dark waves to rub his neck at the hairline. My pulse quickened when I felt the tension ease from his shoulders and his body shiver under my touch.

His lips quirked up and he threw me a quick glance. “Can’t tell you.”

“Seriously?” I asked, halting my massage.

“Don’t want to jinx it.” He wiggled against my hand like a dog that won’t let you stop petting him.

I laughed and resumed my caress. I understood player superstitions. I used to sing and dance to “Gettin’ Jiggy Wit It” before every soccer game in eighth grade. I’m still convinced it worked because we’d gone undefeated and won the city championship that year.

When the horn sounded to mark the end of the first period, I turned to Aleksandr. “Are you coming with me?”

“Da.”
He emphasized the
yes
in Russian. At least he’d remembered I was his translator, and he wasn’t supposed to know much English; I sure hadn’t. To me, this was a date.

After making our way to the concourse, I excused myself to use the ladies’ room.

I heard a female voice call my name as I took my spot at the end of the line. I scanned the area for the voice that had beckoned me when I saw Shannon step out of the line and walk back to where I stood.

“Hey, girl!” She had her arms around me before I could respond.

“Hey,” I said as I broke away. “How’s State?”

“So frickin’ hard,” she said, though her smile told me she didn’t mind. “Tell me why I went into prelaw, again?”

“Because you’re smart as hell and like to argue with people,” I answered, returning the grin.

“That’s not true.” She nudged my arm with her elbow. “See what I did there?”

“Stop laughing at your own jokes. That’s my thing,” I said.

Shannon hadn’t changed much since high school, still rocking long, dark brown hair and bronze skin, even in the middle of December. Since her dad owned a chain of tanning salons around the metro Detroit area, her skin stayed perfectly sun-kissed. Shannon, my class’s valedictorian, was pretty and smart. Too smart. It was as if she didn’t know how to tone down her intelligence to talk to people. She’d always get an eye roll or a big sigh from classmates when her arm shot up to answer a question. Every. Single. Question.

Our friendship worked because we both let the other one be herself. Shannon was smart and a little awkward, whereas I was athletic and a little awkward. Neither one of us drank in high school, so instead of going to football games and parties on Friday nights, we hung out at the local civic arena and watched Drew’s hockey games. Shannon didn’t even like hockey before she met me, but it beat sitting home on the weekend, so she rolled with it.

“How’ve you been?” she asked. We both took a few steps forward as the line moved.

“Great. Just working on my social work degree so I can help people before they become your future clients.”

“You don’t think I want to be a prosecutor?”

“Nope.” I glanced at the concrete floor, wondering if I should even ask the next question. Ah, what the hell. “I saw you with Drew when we first got here. What’s up with you guys?”

“We saw each other at a party on campus freshman year and we’ve been dating ever since.” We inched up a few more steps as a woman came out of the restroom.

“You’ve been dating for three years?” I asked. I’m sure my voice held more surprise than I meant to express. Drew had been dating Shannon for three years? And he never told me?

“We both have really busy schedules. I’m always studying, and he’s always practicing or traveling, but, um, yeah.” Shannon looked at the girl in front of us in line, effectively avoiding my eyes. “It’s kinda weird running into you while I’m with him, ya know?”

“Why?” I asked in confusion. Had I done something to offend her, other than let our friendship slip away? Maybe it was a big deal to some people. To me, it was just the cycle of life.

“I don’t know, I just—I know you liked Drew a while back, and I would never want to hurt you,” Shannon said, finally looking at me. Her relief was almost tangible. “Are you mad?”

“No,” I said. “Seriously, I’m here with someone.”

Would I have been angry with Shannon if I were here with Kristen instead of Aleksandr? Yes and no. We’d graduated, so it wasn’t a total slap in my face. And I was over Drew. But it did hurt that he’d picked her over me, even years later. What did she have that I didn’t? My internal thoughts needed to tone down the cattiness before I grew karmic whiskers.

“You’re sure you aren’t mad because it’s Drew?” Shannon asked. She looked so nervous that I almost felt bad for her, but I was too busy thinking about how pathetic her nerves made me look. We followed the line forward again as two more women came out of the bathroom.

“Oh my gosh. That whole thing I had for Drew was lame. Just a crush a long time ago,” I told her with certainty.

“It’s good to talk to you again,” Shannon told me, leaning in for another hug.

I hugged her back before she entered the restroom.

When I walked out of the ladies’ room, I spotted Drew and Aleksandr talking. Well,
talking
might not be the correct word, since Aleksandr and Drew were almost nose to nose and Aleksandr had a fist clenched at his side.

Drew’s lips were moving as he watched me approach, but I couldn’t make out what he’d said.

I rushed to Aleksandr’s side, taking hold of his fist, so he wouldn’t use it. His breathing was audible, and his shoulders were heaving. How the hell could someone who supposedly couldn’t speak English get so angry?

“Stay the fuck away,” he said to Drew in heavily accented English.

“What’s going on?” I asked.

“Neeshtoh
,
”
Aleksandr spat, grabbing my hand and pulling me toward our seats.

“Yeah, that looked like
nothing
,” I muttered as I followed him.

“You all right?” I asked Aleksandr during the first break in play of the second period. I’d given him some time to cool down from whatever had transpired between him and Drew in the concourse by letting him watch the hockey game in silence.

“Da,”
he responded.

No eye contact. Speaking Russian. Not all right.

“You seem upset.”

“Tell me the truth about him, Audushka.” He swiveled to look at me. “I deserve that, don’t I?”

I nodded. “Drew and I have been friends since birth. I had a crush on him years ago. He made it clear he never liked me in that way. Now he’s dating someone who used to be a good friend of mine. It’s kind of weird, but no big deal.”

“He likes you in that way now.”

“No. He doesn’t.”

Aleksandr laughed. “I can’t tell if you’re lying or clueless.”

“Seeing as I’ve never had a boyfriend and the only guys who’ve ever showed interest in me just wanted sex, I’d say I’m completely clueless.” In raising my voice to emphasize my point, I’d drawn the attention of roughly thirty of the twenty thousand people at Joe Louis Arena watching the hockey game. Though we’d been conversing in Russian, I still slunk back into my seat trying to curl up like a roly-poly bug.

“You’re too beautiful to be completely clueless,” Aleksandr mumbled, his eyes returning to the action on the ice.

Beautiful?
I have fairly good self-esteem, but the B-word had never been on my radar.

“I’m not beautiful. I’m average. I’m the wing woman, not the one guys go for.” I sighed. “I guess that makes me a realist.”

“You are clueless. You don’t even know.”

“Know what?”

“The effect you have on me.” He met my eyes again and shifted toward me. “The effect you have on others.”

Holy crap. My effect on him? A tight ass for him to ogle while I translated his words for the media?

Did this guy realize the effect he had on me? Did he know that every time I looked at him I saw stars? Or that his voice was my new favorite song? Did he know his presence made me feel more comfortable and calm than I’d ever felt around anyone in my life, including my best friends?

But I couldn’t tell him any of those things.

“I have no effect on anyone. I’m a ghost. Forgettable.”

“A ghost is haunting, possessing.” Aleksandr placed his hand on top of my thigh as he leaned closer. His lips brushed my ear as he spoke. “You are anything but forgettable. You are so beautiful, the sun dims when you’re around.”

I didn’t understand his angle. I’d already chosen him. I didn’t want Drew. Was he throwing the kitchen sink at me to get in my pants?

“Kristen and I were walking across campus one day and there was this guy driving around yelling things into a megaphone out his car window. He said, ‘Wow, you’re hot!’ When Kristen and I both smiled, he corrected himself. ‘Not you. The one in purple.’ I was wearing red.”

“I’m not even gonna respond to that story. That guy was an idiot. I’m not an idiot. And I’m not letting you go.”

“Not letting me go?” I asked. “You think you have me?”

“Yes.” He leaned in all the way and planted his lips on mine. I sunk into the kiss, my eyes fluttering shut as he pressed harder.

“Seeing your friend with him upsets you, doesn’t it? Just like seeing you with me upsets him.”

His voice caused my heavy lids to flash open. Why couldn’t he just stop at having me? I’d let him have me in the arena’s grimy bathroom or on the beer-soaked floor. I didn’t care where we were as long as his lips were on mine again.

I tried to brush it off. “It doesn’t matter.”

“It does. You shouldn’t have to tiptoe around your friends.”

“I avoid conflict. I fly under the radar. Everyone is happy.” He’d crossed the conversation into uncomfortable territory, even for us.

“That’s fucked up.”

“Exactly.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Why? You didn’t do anything.” I looked at him. His eyes were sad but gray—the sky before a thunderstorm.

“I’m sorry you’ve never been able to share your feelings with your friends because you think they’ll be mad at you and end the friendship.”

“It makes life easier.” If my eyes would have given off laser beams, there would have been a puddle of water at center ice.

“Does it? I would think that’s a lot to keep up. Must be exhausting.”

“I keep the peace.”

“At what price?”

I shrugged again.

“I think the flying-under-the-radar bit is a total smoke show. It’s fake. You want people to notice you, to care about you. You think you have to suppress your feelings because you don’t want to lose anyone else. You don’t want people to think you’re looking for attention, yet you desperately crave attention because you are missing the two fundamental people who fill that need for a child. It’s okay to say what you want and feel what you feel, Audushka. It’s not weak. Keeping people at a distance will lead you to a very lonely life.”

“I’m gonna take a walk.” I got up from my seat. I needed to get away.

Aleksandr grabbed my hand and pulled me back down. “You don’t have to run away from me. I won’t be mad if you open up.”

“I don’t open up, so don’t take it personal.” I balled my hands into fists—in frustration—I wasn’t going to punch him or anything.

“Is talking about something that scary?” Aleksandr asked, uncurling one of my fists and lacing his fingers with mine.

I nodded.

“I would be jealous if a girl I liked chose someone else over me.”

“But that would never happen because you’re a hot Russian hockey god.”

Aleksandr choked out a laugh. “What?”

Tension relieved. Exactly what I wanted.

“Sasha, I’m not interested in Drew anymore, haven’t been in years. It was the realization of who he was dating that shocked me. He’s dated girls before. But for him to choose one of my best friends. I don’t know. It’s weird.”

“Yeah, I’m sure that sucks.”

“Isn’t there an unwritten friend rule? You can’t date the person your friend had a major crush on for years?”

“I have no room to talk. I stole Gribov’s choice.”

“What?” My head snapped to face Aleksandr. Just hearing Gribov’s name made me think of his rude gesture in the locker room. What kind of guy jiggles his junk at someone?

“He called dibs on my new translator if she was a hot female. But I stole you, so I can’t say I follow that rule. You’re the one who said all’s fair in love and war.”

“Gribov called dibs on the next warm female body. I can’t say that’s very flattering.”

“You should be very flattered. He said the first translator Zhyena interviewed was a dog. And she modeled for someplace or other, so she said.”

“This is a ridiculous conversation.” Although a twang of pride hit me, hearing him say they’d interviewed another translator. I thought I’d gotten the job because Orlenko and Grandpa were such good friends.

“You’re right. I don’t want to talk about him.” Aleksandr leaned over and brushed his lips across mine so lightly it was painful. “Just promise me you’ll always tell me what you’re feeling. I’m not going to leave you if you speak your mind. Trust in me, Audushka.”

I nodded, my lips sweeping across his as my head bobbed.

“I don’t want you to be on tiptoes around me. Not unless you’re reaching to kiss me.”

I pressed my lips to his firmly. I had no other answer. I appreciated his effort, but he couldn’t erase a lifetime in a few minutes.