Authors: Penelope Fletcher
Head spinning I struggled to
understand. “But when you didn’t wake up I thought I’d failed. I
thought … Breandan thought he stopped me in time.”
In a fluid move that blurred she
trawled her fingers through her hair in agitation, her movement
abruptly jerky and restless. “These memories … they are not mine.
They be yours. And it’s not just memories, but feelings. When you
said Breandan’s name, my heart just–” Her gaze flicked to Ro who
smiled broadly.
“
This be the boy we saw
outside Demon Theory, yeah? Nice.”
I scowled at him.
Lex rolled her eyes, but spoke to me.
“I think you had my soul, Rae. You carried it with you. And when
the Sect caught you and started to … experiment … you released me
somehow.” She shrugged. “I woke up then followed your call. Maybe
you called other people too.”
I looked at Ro. “How did you get
involved?”
He bumped his two fists together
repeatedly and frowned. “She was wandering around the Temple,
looking for you. When I found her I didn’t know….” He shook his
head and made a funny noise, clucking his tongue to the roof of his
mouth. “So many lies. I’m not who you think I am.” He looked me in
the eye and smiled half-heartedly. “I am Vodoun, and when I found
her I knew what she was, what she had become. I didn’t know who’d
done it to her … she wouldn’t talk to me at first. She just stared
like she was trying to work out why she wasn’t putting the hurt on
me. I hid her in Northhouse basement, and was planning to take her
back to the slums when night fell. Then the Clerics dragged you out
in front of the Disciples.” He smirked. “Didn’t need to think on it
much after that to figure it out. I was terrified she would try to
help you and get caught. So … I agreed to fight the shifter
thinking I could knock her out and save her. Then I told Lex what
happened and she spoke to me.” He looked at her. “When I told her
you were at Temple, alive, the light flickered on behind her eyes
and she whispered all quiet like, “Fairy.”.” He chuckled. “Then she
started ordering me about, and I couldn’t get her to shut up, or be
calm until I agreed to go get you.”
Rubbing my circlet then pushing the
hair off my face I breathed out. “That is one messed up story, Ro.
Do you realize what might have happened if Amelia managed to get
your neck between her jaws, or if she’d swiped a claw too deep into
your stomach? Do you not have the faintest clue of the risk you
took coming to get me?”
He punched my shoulder. “I got your
back.”
I yanked on a clump of my hair;
convinced I was going to scream in the face of how nonchalant he
was about risking his life.
“
We must keep moving,” Lex
said tonelessly and walked off in that strange fluid
glide.
I hesitated, looking back over my
shoulder. “I had friends back there. People I have to
help.”
She drifted on. “They will be rescued
by the fairies when they come looking for you.”
“
Uh, but Breandan can feel
where I am. If he senses I have moved on, he won’t wait to check.
We can’t abandon them.”
She stopped and spun to face me. I
blinked because her features blurred together she moved so fast. “I
don’t want to fight,” she replied stiffly. “I want to go far away
from that place. It feels bad now. I want us to
survive.”
“
It’s just
Temple.”
A flash of something close to rage
flitted across her doll-like face. “It feels bad now, something
evil is happening there, and I don’t want to go back.”
I hissed. “Well I am.”
Lex shrieked, the sound high, jarring,
and deranged. I jumped, my mouth dropping wide even as her hands
flew to her cheeks. Her face crumpled and her eyes welled with
blood again. Gods, she was creepier than Tomas.
Ro approached her with care. “It’s all
good,” he said soothingly.
“
You’ll take care of me?”
she whispered and walked into his arms. It was beautiful to see,
her chalky skin against the milky brown of his.
He hugged her to him. “I
promise.”
The sun winked out of sight and I
jolted as Tomas awakened. He was close. Dreadfully close. I could
almost imagine him crawling out of his resting place and coughing
up dirt.
But one thing I didn’t have to imagine
was a distinct feeling of him getting closer, the darkness
swelled.
He was coming for me.
“
Uh, guys,’ I said not sure
how to put this delicately. “How do you feel about
vampires?”
Ro made a noise of disgust and
derision.
Lex straightened. “Tomas is coming?”
she asked with a shadow of a naughty grin on her face.
It was so like how she used to be I
smiled back as I asked, “How–”
“
I told you, memories and
feelings. This thing you have with him is dark and complicated,”
she said solemnly. “And really weird, just saying. You should be
careful the darkness doesn’t– ” Cutting off, both she and Ro took a
step back, their gazes fixing over my shoulder.
Cold lips pressed onto the back of my
neck. My hair was pushed aside to fall over my shoulder as Tomas
ran his mouth up the side of my neck, breathing in. His hands slid
under the folds of the blanket I was wrapped in and travelled
gently over the bruises covering my hips and sides.
“
How much do you hurt?” he
asked.
“
It’s bearable,” I replied
breathlessly. “I’m healing.”
He turned me in his arms so I faced
him. I stared hard at his chin, avoiding his eyes, not wanting to
see my reflection in them, afraid to connect.
He waited patiently.
The silence deepened and stretched on.
Instead of becoming comfortable, it rubbed me up, and unsettled me
to the point tears threatened to fall.
I noted he wore all black again, right
down to his boots.
“
Do you take your clothes
off when you sleep?” I blurted then blushed and stammered to
apologize. “I mean, I just thought … it makes sense you’d be naked
since your clothes would get muddy, and yours aren’t. But don’t
answer.” I waved my hands; still I had not looked past the smooth
column of his neck. “I’m sorry.”
Soon, my gaze drifted up, over his
strong square jaw, firm, wide lips, and sharp cheekbones. I paused
at his crooked nose that should have been repulsive, but instead
was dear to me. His skin was ashy, pale, and cold-soaked. I could
feel the frosty temperature seeping through the blanket, and I
shivered at the contrast, as a fairy I ran hot. Finally, I reached
his eyes that glinted beneath his jutting brow and broad eyebrows.
His coal black hair was swept back off his high forehead and was
cut close at the neck.
He swallowed hard, and I watched his
throat bob. “When I sleep in the ground … yes it is more
comfortable and practical to sleep without any clothes. I simply
hide these nearby until I need them.” A strange expression
flittered across his face, and I would have said it was
embarrassment but he was a vampire, and they were beyond such petty
emotion. So I will say he looked enamored with the idea of feeling
bashfully discomfited. “Sleeping in the earth is an experience I
would like to share with you,” he said formally.
Unable to find a suitable response, I
cleared my throat, and rubbed my nose.
Tomas slowly unwrapped the roughly
woven blanket, and without taking his eyes from mine, wrapped it
tighter around my torso. He tugged off his shirt, ruffling his
hair, and making him shake his head to smooth it down then handed
the thin, black material to me wordlessly.
I took it from him, my fingers
brushing his. “Ta,” I murmured.
His head tilted with the slightest
inclination as he stepped around me. “Turn around,” he said to Lex
and Ro, whom I assume did so without question, as I heard no
argument from either of them.
I dropped the blanket, glad to be rid
of its itchy confines, and paused, realizing how ridiculous it was
to be stark naked in a forest at night. Instead of feeling abashed,
I felt outlandishly liberated. Pulling on my glamour my hearing,
sense of smell and range of vision was muted as a blanket of magic
transformed me into human form. I scrunched up my nose; never had I
thought I would miss my tail and wings.
Leaves crunched underfoot as Tomas
walked back round to stare at my face. “Rae?”
I was simply not bold enough not to
blush, and I clutched the shirt to my chest. “Turn
around.”
“
No.”
I blinked, fought a smile. “Uh, turn
around please?”
“
I find I like looking at
you.” His eyes flicked down and he grinned, all toothy, his fangs
somewhat extended.
I glanced behind me and found Ro and
Lex were steadily walking through the trees back towards Temple.
Lex looked like a floating ghost as she passed in and out of sight
behind the broad trunks.
Tomas touched my collarbone. My heart
kicked and sped up. I tried hard to slow it down, but it was a
useless task when his hands were on me, and I fidgeted when his
smooth palm travelled over my stomach, traced my waist, and settled
on my hip.
Being with Tomas wasn’t like being
with Breandan, not at all. I felt bold, confident when he looked or
touched me. I could relate to him. He wasn’t perfect like Breandan
was … he was flawed, like me.
He pulled me closer and leaned over to
murmur in my ear, “Do you remember how you felt when I held you
like this before?” His hands were busy, and my mouth went dry
remembering how I had felt the first time he kissed me in my dorm
room at Temple.
I dragged in a shuddering breath,
experiencing tunnel vision. “I will never forget.” The tunnel
suddenly glowed silver and were the edges of the world had gone
blurry everything snapped back into focus. “But Brean–”
With a snarl, I was shoved back until
I hit the dirt, Tomas over me. His was furious, and I felt a
prickle of fear replaced with a surge of lust as his hand swept
over my stomach.
“
Do not say his name.” He
kissed me, full of fire and anger. I felt a sharp prick on my
tongue and he sucked. He pulled away, quivering, and his fangs ran
out. “You know you want me not him.”
As I looked into his eyes, I felt
something within me stir. It resisted the passion I felt and
prickled my insides as if hands with sharp nails scored my heart. I
wanted him? Yes, I wanted him, but did I feel for him enough to
turn my back on Breandan? I knew it was a possibility, but my mind
shied away from it. No … I knew what I wanted. The prickling at the
back of my mind became a sharp pain as I pushed him
away.
He resisted, frowning. “What is the
matter?”
“
Get off me.” I wriggled
from beneath him and snatched at the shirt. It pulled taut, the end
caught underneath his frozen form. “Do you mind?” I yanked on it
until he shifted his weight.
Hands shaking, I pulled the shirt on
to cover myself. I wrapped my hands around my stomach, and took a
deep breath. My body was going haywire, but I did not want it to be
like this. I did not want the fear of making the wrong choice to
spoil my first time. I wanted to have a clear heart and conscious
when I bedded the one I loved. Tomas had this way of making me
forget myself. Ungh. I did not do things like this, so why when
this vampire came near me did I loose all sense of self?
“
You don’t want me,” Tomas
said slowly peering up at me, his hands open on his lap. His voice
was remote, cautious, but there was a trace of a question,
hope.
Pushing the hair from my face, I
exhaled sharply. “Gods, I’m sorry. It’s just I touch you and
think–”
“
That you should be with
him,” he cut in. Well, he said it so I didn’t have to. Tomas sighed
and stood smoothly. Careful not to touch me he forced me to look
into his bottomless eyes. “And when you are with him you think no
thoughts of me.” It was not a question.
I stumbled over my words, unable to
lie. “That’s … not true.” Not entirely.
His cold fingers brushed along the
outside of my arms causing the skin to goose-pimple. “Not in the
way I wish you to think of me.”
My instinct was to lie, but I couldn’t
physically bring myself to do it. I twisted my hands into the ends
of his shirt and winced when it ripped a little under the strain.
It was already threadbare, and it smelt like freshwater and
minerals. It smelt like Tomas. I fingered the fabric. “You washed
your clothes?”
He nodded. “In the river.”
Standing there, half dressed in the
presence of my vampire was suddenly awkward. In the time we had
been apart I had taken a moment to think about my actions, and I
had seen just how wrong my behavior had been. When I had first met
Tomas I’d been nothing but wary of him. Yet the spark of lust I had
experienced in Bayou dorms had shown me an exciting and dangerous
side to our relationship.
After spending time with Breandan, I
knew it was a side I no longer wished to pursue. Oh, there was
desire, and want, but what we want was not always what is good for
us.
I couldn’t be his girl, but I could be
his friend.