Desolate Souls (Forgotten Souls MC, #1) (13 page)

Holding Alana tightly to him, he turns and leaves the room without another word. I stand there speechless, unable to move as I take in everything that just happened. Alana was here, right in front of me and just like that she is gone.

––––––––

“L
ana?” Paul calls out before opening the bathroom door, stepping inside. Taking a seat on the floor beside the bathtub, he looks over at me with worry etching his face. “What happened back at the club?”

I shake my head, not knowing what to say. Seeing Jax again brought out emotions in me that I haven’t felt in forever. At first, I thought it was a hallucination, that my mind was playing tricks on me. The moment I heard his voice, I knew it was him and for a brief moment I was overcome with joy, but it was quickly replaced with anger.

“Lana baby, please talk to me,” he pleads. Lifting my eyes to meet his, I fight back the tears that threaten to fall. “Did he hurt you?”

“No,” I mutter, shaking my head. “Not the way you think.”

He creases his brow, a puzzled look on his face. “I don’t understand.”

“I never thought I’d see him again,” I whisper. “I don’t know what came over me,” I add, taking in a deep breath. I am quite accomplished at pushing my emotions aside, but this time it’s different. He still has a hold on me, one that I thought was severed a long time ago.

“Who? Did you know him?”

I nod my head. “It was Jackson,” I manage to strangle out. I am trembling, not out of fear of Jax but because seeing him again has uncovered memories that I have kept buried.

“Jackson?” he asks, shaking his head. “Are you sure?”

“I could never forget him,” I whisper.

Paul swallows hard, his face etched with pain. He closes his eyes, resting his head on the wall behind him, his sharp intake of breath filling the silent room. “This can’t be happening,” he mutters as he fists his hands.

“I don’t want to see him again,” I say, looking down at my submerged hands in the water. “I can’t forgive him for abandoning me.”

Paul opens his eyes, lowering his gaze to meet mine. “I’ll talk to Hawk,” he says, smiling at me. “Are you sure you’re OK?”

“I’ll be fine,” I tell him, but more than anything I’m trying to convince myself.

He rises to his knees, looking over at me with sympathetic eyes. “I don’t want to lose you, Alana.”

Letting out a ragged breath, I smile at him. “You’ll never lose me, and Jackson Cade is nothing more than a bad memory, one I don’t want to be reminded of. He walked away from me a long time ago. There’s no way in hell I’m letting him back into my life to walk away all over again.”

“I’m sorry again, about earlier. I just worry about you.”

“I know,” I whisper, as I rise to my feet. Reaching out, I grab for the towel hanging on the rack behind him. “And I worry about you.”

As I start to wrap the towel around me, Paul reaches up, grabbing it from my grasp before tossing it to the floor. His calloused fingers glide up my body as he stands, stopping at my breast. He looks at me with hooded eyes, causing wetness to pool between my legs. I know this look, the meaning behind it and why we both need this more than anything.

Grasping the back of his hand with mine, I pull it towards my heaving chest, silently begging him to make me forget. His fingertips graze against my nipple, the friction causing it to pebble under his touch.

Before I can utter a single word, he lifts me in his arms, stopping only when my rear end is resting on the countertop. He says nothing as he spreads my legs, burying his face between my thighs, the only audible sound is my moans as his tongue lavishes my drenched pussy.

––––––––

––––––––

A
s I exit the stage and head down the hall, my eyes land on Hawk in a heated discussion with Paul and Jax. Clenching my teeth together, I push past them and make my way to the dressing room, slamming the door shut behind me.

“What the fuck is he doing here?” I mutter to myself, unaware that Trix is staring at me like I’ve grown two heads.

“Sweetheart, you’ve got some major issues,” she says, rolling her eyes at me. “For the life of me, I don’t know why Paul insists on keeping you around.”

As I pull on my shorts, I glare at her. Trix has hated me since the first night we met. I get it, she’s angry because she’s not headlining here, but this isn’t The Lusty Lady anymore. From what I’ve heard from the other dancers, The Lusty Lady was doomed when the doors opened. Business was always slow, even on the weekends and the girls were lucky to make fifty dollars on a Friday night. With the opening of Body Shots, not only is the place packed every night, but the clientele is much more desirable. Trix was the star at The Lusty Lady, banking more than any other girl, but her standards were as low as you can get. She didn’t care who she had to blow or what she had to do to make twenty bucks, and it doesn’t surprise me one bit.

“Maybe he has things for the crazy ones,” she smirks, turning away from me.

“You know what your problem is, Trix? You think your shit doesn’t stink, that somehow you are better than anyone here.”

“Because I am,” she says turning towards me. “I’m prettier, have a better body, definitely a better dancer, and let’s not forget that I’m a better lay than any one of you. Sooner or later, Paul will realize that and kick you to the curb. In the meantime, I’ll play his little game, but I know he wants me. They all do.”

“Keep telling yourself that,” I say, shaking my head. I grab my tank top and pull it over my head, trying not to let Trix get inside my head. Yanking the door open, I throw my bag over my shoulder and walk out.

“Hey,” Paul says rushing towards me. “Are you leaving?”

“Yeah, I think that might be the best idea,” I say, looking past him at Jax, his eyes locked on me. “Why is he here? I thought you were gonna talk to Hawk.”

“It’s out of Hawk’s and my control. The Forgotten Souls own the club until Hawk can buy them out, so neither of us have any say.”

“I can’t believe this,” I mutter, closing my eyes. I don’t think I can handle seeing Jax on a regular basis. “We could just move back to Langley,” I say opening my eyes, inspiration striking me. 

Shaking his head, he looks at me with regret. “I wish it were that simple.” He pauses, looking over his shoulder at where Jax is standing. When his gaze returns to me, I see the despair in his eyes. “Jax wants you and he’ll stop at nothing until you’re his.”

Sagging my shoulders in defeat, I lower my gaze. The last thing I want is to deal with Jax on a regular basis. I hate him and want him to go far away.

“Here,” Paul says, reaching into his pocket and pulling out a baggie. He passes me a bar, watching as I toss it back. “I’ll be home in an hour or two.”

I nod at him and watch him walk back towards the main room before I make my way to the back exit, trying to avoid running into Jax. As I step out into the cool night air, I breathe a sigh of relief. One down and many more to go, I think to myself as I begin the mile hike home.

S
tanding in the darkness, I watch as Alana comes down the stairs of the apartment building, completely oblivious that I am lurking in the shadows. She’s avoiding me at every turn, keeping her distance from me even when we are in the same room. Paul says she wants nothing to do with me, that I am nothing but a horrible memory, but I refuse to give up.

If she would just hear me out, we could put all of this behind us. She means everything to me and if given the chance, we could move forward. Once she learns the truth, she will understand, but first I have to get her alone.

Trailing behind her, I watch as she follows the same path she does every night, until she pushes through the front door of Body Shots. I stand outside, staring up at the sign, still finding it hard to believe that she’s really here.

“You know I never saw you as the stalker type,” Deuce chuckles as he comes to stand beside me. “Thought I’d find you here.”

“What have you found out?” I ask, refusing to look at him.

“Nothing. I can’t even track down a lease back in Langley which makes no sense. I’ve got Beast looking into it, but so far he’s coming up empty handed.”

My heart sinks at his words. None of this makes any sense and I know Paul is the key. “What about him? He’s been working for Hawk for years. No way has that fucker had luck on his side the entire time.”

“That’s where it gets interesting. At least with Alana, we could pull up the basics. Birth certificate, school records, doctor visits, the norm.”

“What are you getting at?” I ask, finally turning to face him.

He shrugs. “There is no record of a Paul Randall ever being born. It’s as if he doesn’t exist.”

It takes me a moment to grasp what he is telling me. No record of his existence is impossible. I know Deuce, and for him to turn up with nothing is something that doesn’t happen every day. In fact, it has never happened before now. “What about Hawk? What are the chances he knows about Paul’s past?”

“If my gut is right, I’d say the chances of getting him to fess up to anything aren’t good unless he has something to gain from it.”

“Or lose,” I add. I know very little about Hawk, but he’s no different than most. He’d spill in a second if it meant saving his own sorry ass.

“Point taken. First things first. Let’s see what Beast digs up. If he’s still batting zero, we start looking at plan B.”

I nod my head in agreement, all the while my mind is reeling. If Alana would just hear me out, I know I could take her away from all of this.

“Don’t even think about it,” Deuce warns. “I know you want to get her out of there and away from Paul, but until we know what we’re up against, you’re fighting a losing battle. She thinks you abandoned her and until she’s ready to hear the truth, all you’re going to do is make her hate you even more.” For being such a notorious heartless bastard, what he says makes sense. I just don’t like it.

“I can’t just sit back and do nothing. I gave up years of my life for her and it was all for nothing. Her situation is no better than the one I left her in,” I say, guilt ridden.

“First of all, you didn’t leave her. Second, it wasn’t for nothing. Ridding this planet of someone like Phil Martin was a necessity and you know it.”

“It doesn’t change the fact that she’s in there doing whatever that fucker tells her to do. He’s playing her and she’s gonna be the one who gets hurt,” I say, running my hands through my hair.

“I get it, but there ain’t shit you can do about it, at least not yet. Give me a few days to see what I can come up with and if we’re in the same boat, we’ll do whatever is necessary. You feel me?”

Nodding my head in agreement, I follow Deuce inside, my heart pounding in my chest. My eyes land on her as she stands by Paul, the smile on her face illuminating the room. As I approach, her gaze lands on me, the smile on her face vanishing.

There was a time when I was the only person who could make her smile, who knew the Alana she was before Phil Martin got his hands on her. The same Alana I want back in my life, scars and all.

––––––––