Diamonds Fall (18 page)

"Sugar and lemon please, no cream."

"I wanted to speak with you alone. I thought, given the circumstances, we shouldn't need chaperones."

Annabel smiled, stirring her tea absentmindedly. The silver spoon clinked against the china as she did so, the noise sounded loud in the awkward atmosphere.

"What are the circumstances Mister Brogan?"

"Well, that we are, if you are still agreeable to the idea of course, going to marry."

Annabel sipped her tea, desperate to change the topic. Theodore continued in a low whisper, his voice hesitant.

"What really happened to you?"

Annabel was somewhat surprised by his forwardness.

"I've already told you Mister Brogan," she smiled with what she hoped was kindness.

"Teddy please, Mister Brogan is my father's name. With respect, I believe your mother altered your tale considerably through fear I would run away. I don't believe anything that happened to you can have been your fault Miss, for the record."

"Why do you insist that I call you Teddy if you cannot call me Annabel? Given the circumstances, don't you think that might be necessary?"

"Of course...Annabel," he sipped his tea, looking thoughtfully out the window.

"It's a lovely house you have here, beautiful. The house I spend most of my time in is very dingy. Father likes dark colours, hardly any light in the whole place. What with Mother having passed some years ago, there isn't a hint of femininity there at all."

They sat for the next ten minutes sipping on their tea, neither one knowing the appropriate thing to break the heavy silence. Finishing her cup Annabel excused herself, retiring to her bedchamber on the pretence of dressing for dinner. She did not believe for one minute staying had been Theodore's idea but more her mother's way of ensuring her daughter would marry him.

Her bath was drawn up and she lay in the warm water until her fingertips grew wrinkled. She found that when her head was submerged every noise was muffled, as if coming from behind a wall, giving off the illusion she had entered a different world entirely. Her maids dismissed for an hour she ran her fingers lightly over her flawless skin, remembering when it had been longer, rougher fingers doing this. She longed for Daniel's touch so much it physically hurt, wondering why he had not even replied to her letter.

Coming back up to the surface, her lungs burning for air, she dried herself off and rang the bell, getting laced into yet another silk gown. This one was a lighter silver than the one she was wearing the day before, with golden lace sleeves which sparkled when caught by the light. The neckline was scooped, showing a small amount of her snow white flesh which she adorned with a jewelled necklace, her hair swept into an array of pinned up curls and glittering hair combs.

Over the next few days her mother talked of nothing but Theodore, going on about how stunning a couple he and her daughter would be out in high society, flushed with so much pride Annabel couldn't bare it. Daniel was now in Annabel's every waking thought. She felt as if she wasn't doing enough for him yet was at a loss what more could be done. Whenever the topic was approached she was shot down. Her parents had now taken to inviting Theodore to all of their meals as they knew she would not dare discuss Daniel around him - although, she was on the brink of it. It was only her mother's threat that Daniel's sentence could be extended holding her tongue.

Annabel was told the decorating of Billy and Patsy's quarters had been started and ended just two days later. The furniture had been taken from empty rooms in the east wing of the house to make the job quicker. The cosy sitting room still had the highly stuffed sofa in front the fire but now also housed two plump arm chairs on either side of it and an elaborately woven rug. The smallest room was made into Genevieve's room with a single sleigh bed and a wooden dolls house, surrounded by all of Annabel's old dolls sat on a set of shelves along the wall. A new teddy bear lounged on the pink lace covers, a writing desk in the corner. Billy's room (fashioned from what was a dressing room) housed a four poster bed now draped with a large canopy of midnight blue silk, embroidered with tiny silver stars. Genevieve's temporary crib sat in the corner. Patsy's room was the biggest of the three bedrooms with a queen sized bed covered in bronze coloured, satin covers. A large mahogany wardrobe stood at the end of the bed, a small fireplace on the right hand wall. Despite the rich furnishings, the best thing about the small apartment was the happiness and love that seemed to fill all of the rooms, making them instantly appear warm and safe.

The staff had grown to love the three new comers almost as much as Annabel, now not even questioning it when they saw their mistress huddled on the rug by the fire, even though she was supposed to be sedated in bed. None of the staff had the heart to tell the Lord and Lady Hoddington where their daughter really was.

After three long weeks with still no definite wedding date, Theodore took his leave from Hoddington manor to attend to business up country. He and Annabel had continued to speak only at meal times with one small turn around the garden where he tried to discuss their upcoming nuptials without success. His goodbye was as polite as should be expected from any noble gentleman, with the promise he would write as soon as he was able. Annabel could have loved him, in her old life before Daniel, but now she must hurt him, or go through life never being a true wife...the wife he deserved. She found it unfair that someone who had once not even wanted to fall in love could be thrown into the path of two perfect men, each vying for her heart.

She made her way slowly back up to her room, nausea rising up her throat with the movement of her steps. By the time Annabel reached her bedchamber she was very close to passing out, her breathing was coming so fast. The nausea she had felt earlier rose with vengeance into her throat causing her to bend over her chamber pot and empty her breakfast into it. Once she had, she fell back onto her heels, holding her head.

"Miss Hoddington, are you alright?" asked a maid, lingering at the door.

"Yes, everything is fine. Can you bring a glass of water and some medicine please? I am feeling quite faint all of a sudden."

The maid curtseyed and left with a short, "yes Miss."

She spent the rest of the day in a daze. She brushed her teeth and took her medicine however the nausea passed as quickly as it had come about. She sat on her bed for a long while, tracing the detailed carving of Daniel's face absentmindedly.

Lunch was brought up to her on a tray, the nausea creeping back in when Annabel smelt the sauce from the silver gravy boat. She ate a piece of bread and ordered the tray to be removed at once. The maid gave her a concerned glance but Annabel just lay down on top of her covers and faced the wall.

The doctor was summoned for, as Annabel knew he would be and he asked her the same questions as before. She told him that yes, she had felt sick but that it was just stress, she was sure of it. She tried desperately to get him to leave but he refused.

"I must get to the bottom of this illness Miss Annabel. It is quite peculiar that you should be suffering for such a long time after your ordeal has ended."

"But my ordeal is not over Doctor. An innocent man has been condemned and it is my fault."

Tears bloomed in her eyes and cascaded down her cheeks.

"Now hush hush Miss, none of that can have been your fault. The two men that were condemned were villains, criminals of the highest order. Only ten years for bludgeoning your own father-"

"It was me."

"Sorry?"

"I bludgeoned his father. He was going to attack me, would you have preferred that?"

The doctor looked on with wide eyes, his mouth agape.

"What has gotten into you? Do not repeat such foul statements outside of this room!"

"Why does no-one wish to accept the truth? I am not the perfect girl that I once was. I was never that person, I have woken up now doctor and I can see the world for the harsh place it really is."

"You are clearly far worse than I had originally diagnosed. Please lie down."

"I am not crazy!"

"I never said you were. Such a diagnosis would ruin me even if it were true. You need to rest."

"Just tell me what is wrong doctor and then leave. I just want to know the facts."

Annabel listed the symptoms she had been feeling. The doctor asked her several follow up questions of the most untoward nature before placing his hands on her lower abdomen.

"What are you doing?" Annabel flinched at the touch.

"It is quite peculiar," he muttered.

"What is? Tell me doctor?"

"Well, the signs all point to one conclusion Miss Annabel but I can't see how it is possible. It appears - excuse me for saying it - that you are with child."

Annabel sat up sharply, her head spinning. Surely she had heard wrong?

"Wh-what did you say?"

"You are carrying a baby."

"But - that is quite impossible."

The doctor smiled sympathetically.

"It appears not."

It was a sin to have a child out of wedlock. Her family would never speak to her again. The entire world would disown her...the child would be shunned. Yet, throughout all of that, she felt a kind of warmth flooding through her. She tried to picture what Daniel had looked like as a child. With his white blonde hair and large hazel eyes, he would have been picture perfect. She put her hand against her stomach, unable to feel anything. It can't have been there more than five weeks but the knowledge she was carrying even the smallest part of Daniel, filled her with a joy she thought she'd never feel again and she grinned.

"Excuse my impertinence Miss but is the child indeed Mister Brogan's?"

Making up her mind in a matter of seconds, wrenching her thoughts away from a tiny baby with Daniel's hazel eyes, she answered.

"Of course - of course it is Theodore's child. Do you think a man spends three weeks under the same roof as his future wife and expects nothing in the way of...that."

"Well I - of course not, I just -"

The doctor looked at her doubtfully. He knew three weeks were not enough time to be showing the signs of pregnancy but once more, to suggest such a scandal would be his ruin.

"You just took me for a whore. I will tell Theodore myself after our wedding Doctor and if this information is released you will face such a ruin you will never be able to work again."

The doctor stood up, placing his equipment back inside his bag.

"Then I wash my hands of you. I will tell your parents you are quite healed but you need another day's bed rest. I trust you will protect my diagnosis by acting well?"

"Yes - yes of course. Thank you Doctor."

"If I'd considered the deceit this job would entail I would have skipped the middle man and gone straight into politics. Good day to you Miss Annabel, do not call on me again."

The doctor did not wait for a returned greeting. He simply tipped his hat slightly and rushed out of the door, his leather bag swinging at his side.

That night Annabel picked at her dinner, eating it on a silver tray in her room just as the doctor had ordered. The smell of the meat and gravy turned her stomach although Annabel smiled, knowing what that implied. When she had finished she slipped a shawl around her shoulders and crept down to Patsy and Billy's rooms, where she would spend the night with the only people who would understand how she felt.

When she told them about the child they both jumped with joy, wrapping her into such a tight embrace she couldn't breathe.

"Oh Daniel will be so pleased! He'll make a great Papa." Patsy exclaimed without thinking.

Annabel grinned, hugging her again.

"Oh he will be perfect won't he?"

Patsy's face suddenly fell.

"But he's - he's in jail Anna."

Annabel's eyes glazed over as her throat tightened.

"He can't know."

"What? But you jus' said -"

Annabel took her arm, leading Patsy into her room so the two girls could talk in private.

"He cannot know whilst he's in prison, it would drive him mad."

Patsy looked as though she wanted to argue but seemed to see the truth in these words.

"What's gunna happen to `im?" Patsy whispered.

Annabel hesitated for a long while but knew she would have to tell her eventually.

"He - he has been sentenced to ten years. Tom has been hung."

"No. Daniel - but he's innocent."

"They charged him with the attack on Trevor. I tried to say it was me, I wrote a statement but I fear my father has gotten rid of it somehow. He felt threatened. He told me he paid the police to keep him in jail. I'm so sorry Patsy. This is my fault entirely."

"It ain't your fault Anna. It weren't you that put `im in jail. It were your folks. And anyway, prison's still gotta be better than the village. If it weren't for you we'd still be there."

"Please Patsy." The understanding in Patsy's face was driving Annabel mad. She wanted her to be angry, to lash out at her. But she simply took her hand.

"We're strong Anna. We'll be okay." She looked up, fire in her eyes, "you'll `ave to marry Theodore."

"Not you too Patsy. Please, I can take it from everyone else but not you."

Patsy did get angry now, she dropped Annabel's hand, frowning.

"So you'll leave behind all o' this?"

She waved her hands to indicate the luxuries of the manor. "The money an' the power, so tha' your baby can be a bastard? So tha' it will be an outcast? No Anna."

Annabel let out a strangled sob and Patsy folded her into her embrace, patting her back maternally.

"It's a hard world Anna. We gotta make the best of what we got."

When Annabel had dried her tears she lay down on Patsy's bed, suddenly too tired to even move a single muscle. She woke up curled on top of Patsy's blanket due to the heat of the sticky summer's night. In the end, she had only managed an hour or two of restless sleep, her mind whirring all night. She sat up slowly, her muscles heavy and sore. As she rose to her feet nausea once more swept over her. Placing a hand on her stomach she took several deep breaths before making her way back to her own bed chambers.

Her mother found her later that morning huddled in the middle of her bed, the sheets pulled up over her head, despite the heat. The wooden carving was once more pressed into her hand. Lady Elizabeth sat down, pulling the covers off of Annabel's slight frame, drawing in a breath at the state of her raw eyes and matted hair.

"Annabel."

Annabel said nothing, choosing just to lie back against her pillows.

"I'm sick Mother, please let me sleep."

"You're not sick you're wallowing. I'm sick of seeing you like this. I am sending in a maid, you're going to bathe, eat and come downstairs immediately. The doctor said you were fine. Your engagement ball is this weekend, you have a dress fitting to attend and then we are going for lunch. It will do you good to be out in society again."

Annabel dressed carefully, summoning for Patsy - much to her mother's distain - who helped her with her corset, leaving it a tiny bit looser than she would have usually worn it. She put on a pale pink summer dress, which was heavily embroidered and beaded with exquisite pearls. Both girls ate their breakfast sitting back on Annabel's bed, holding the knowledge that she was feeding more than just herself and now had to be especially careful when it came to missing meals. Once finished she took Patsy's arm and walked her down to her own room, where she dressed in a similar, yet less elaborate, suit of a warm beige. The colour complimented her hair, which had turned a slightly more fiery shade with the expensive soaps. The two girls were beginning to feel a sense of hope when they met Lady Elizabeth out on the drive, by the very same golden carriage Annabel had used all those weeks before on her eighteenth birthday.

"Who is this?" Lady Elizabeth asked, looking at Patsy with distrust.

"Patricia Pierce. She is my distant cousin, on father's side of course. She has come to stay with us for a while."

"This is the-"

"The cousin? Yes."

"Annabel you will ruin us all bringing people like that out in society."

"Mother, you will ruin my patience if you protest."

"Get in the carriage. Come on, hurry up!"

Lady Elizabeth conversed little with Patsy, choosing instead to look her up and down in a silent judgement. It seemed she could find nothing amiss with the young woman; Patsy was dressed as properly as if she had lived in the higher classes since birth and her hands, in an imitation of Annabel, were folded in her lap, exactly as they should be.

Annabel had spent many an hour already with Patsy working on her diction so she even sounded more like a high society girl. She was proving to be incredibly intelligent, picking up manners and information with an almost photographic memory. She even managed to contain her facial expression at the sight of the carriage, standing ornately in the driveway, although she did let out a slow wink towards Billy when she noticed him leading a horse towards the stables.

Their first stop was the dress makers. Its high, perfectly arranged windows gleamed even in the over cast, muggy weather. The second they stepped inside they were ushered into a private suite, arranged with cream and pale pink furnishings, filled with the most expensive of the shop's items. They were seated and handed tea in fancy bone china cups before being presented with roll after roll of fabric for them to choose from. Annabel gasped at an emerald green shade.

"Patsy that would look just divine on you, it would suit you so well!"

The sales girl smiled, placing the roll amongst the others that had been short listed.

"Well I don't see why you're picking a shade for her Annabel. You can't expect her to come to the ball."

"Mother, Patsy is my cousin if you remember. You can't very well expect her to miss it now, can you? Besides, the young girl of which we speak is in fact in the room, if you wish to discuss her, you could have the manners to direct the conversation to her personally."

Her mother pursed her lips, shaking her head at another roll of fabric but said nothing else on the matter. A couple of hours later they had each chosen the material for their dresses along with several materials for other less important dresses and accessories, to be charged to the family account. They were now sat in a warm restaurant filled with society's elite women and the odd few journalists, who began scribbling furiously the second they walked in. This was, after all, Annabel's first outing in society since she had gone missing.

The room smelt of expensive perfume and sugar, the tinkling sounds of chatter filled the air. Patsy looked awed by the place, its large windows, the golden chandeliers dripping from the ceiling in large upside down triangles, the pink silk walls and the elaborate displays of fresh roses on each table, seemed to have knocked all the air out of her. Even the food looked like a work of art, the cakes all iced with fancy designs, the plates arranged just so. The taste was exquisite as well although, of course, it would seem improper to gorge oneself on food in public so the three of them sat with straight backs, sipping tea and taking tiny bites from the ornate plates in front of them. Annabel found it thrilling to have Patsy with her, to know she was breaking her mother's rules right in front of her. To get the chance to view her world through Patsy's fresh, innocent eyes put everything in sharp perspective.