Diary of a 6th Grade Ninja (a hilarious adventure for children ages 9-12) (4 page)

Wednesday. 10:40 AM. Gym class.

By this time, my hands were shaking. I had endured two
different classes in anticipation for gym. At one point in the morning, I had
even worked up a cold sweat. Zoe made fun of me the whole time.

She was right behind me when I entered into the woods again
at the same place as the day before. I clenched my jaw as I stepped foot into
the moist dirt, or
mud
, waiting to get punched in the face. Luckily that
never happened.

Instead, we were met right away by a shorter ninja. He was
alone, carrying a zip locked baggie of Oreo cookies and two orange sodas. In my
entire life, I can honestly say I never expected a ninja to greet me with
cookies and drinks. It was weird.

“What’s this about?” I asked.

“You’ll see soon enough,” the ninja whispered as he turned
around. “Eat your cookies and follow me.”

Now I know that I should be cautious when given snacks by a
shady character, but c’mon… they were
Oreo cookies
! Did I mention they
were
double stuffed
? I think even the best of us have our weaknesses.

“Lead the way,” I said, grabbing the baggie of cookies.

“You’re seriously going to eat those?” Zoe asked as she
followed behind.

“Darn right.”

Zoe smirked. “Good. ‘Cause I didn’t want to be the only one
eating them.
Gimme
some.”

I took a cookie from the zip locked bag and handed it to
her. The ninja in front of us wasn’t walking very quickly. Maybe he wasn’t in
as much of a hurry as we were, but gym class was only fifty minutes long, and
twenty minutes had already passed.

“Stop,” the ninja said. And then he turned around to face us
again. “We’re here.”

Without moving my head, I glanced around the area in front
of us. “So we only walked about ten steps, and now we’re in your secret
hideout? There’s no one here. What gives?”

The ninja didn’t answer. He slowly lifted his hand up,
pointing at something behind us. When I turned around, I saw what he was
pointing at.

Zoe and I had only walked about ten feet. We were only about
fourteen feet from the edges of the woods that we entered. But in the amount of
time it took us to walk this far, the entire clan of ninjas had quietly entered
into the area. They stood like charcoal colored statues facing us.

“Man, these guys are
good
,” I whispered.

“They’re
alright
,”
Zoe
said.

The ninja at the front of the group approached us. I
couldn’t be sure, but I thought maybe it was the same short one from the day
before. As I studied his movement, I kind of thought he looked like a
“mini-ninja.”
Y’know
, almost like a toy. This thought
caused me to chuckle again.

“What’s so funny?” the ninja asked. He even had a higher
pitched voice. It
wasn’t
the ninja from the day before.

“It’s nothing. I just—”

“Do you know why you’re here?” the ninja asked, interrupting
me.

I pulled the note from my gym shorts. I had been anxious all
day about this meeting, which meant that I opened and closed the note about a
hundred times, reading and re-reading it. The sheet of paper was falling apart
as I held it out to the masked boy. “I got this in homeroom.”

The ninja shook his small head. “You’re here because we’ve
allowed
you to be. You’ve been invited to join our clan. It’s not an invitation you
should take
ligh
—”

This time,
I
interrupted him. “
Yes
. Yes, yes,
and yes please, with a side of French onion
yes
.”

The ninja paused. “You haven’t even heard our proposal yet.”

“I don’t care,” I replied. “Ninjas are the coolest thing
since wireless video game controllers. Of course I want to be a ninja!”

Zoe folded her arms and grumbled.

The short kid looked at her. “The invitation is for
you
as well, darling.”

“
Ew
,” Zoe said. “
Don’t
call
me darling.”

“Apologies,” the ninja said. “Your cousin has just decided
to join our clan. What says you?”

“Meh,” Zoe said. “Is this whole thing a secret?”

The ninja nodded like a bobble-head toy. Seriously, he
looked like a
stinkin
’ child’s play thing!

“So nobody will ever know I was in this club?” Zoe asked.

“Correct.”

After a sigh, she looked at me and tightened her lips. “Why
not? Sounds like fun.”

“Excellent!” shouted the ninja in front of us. The minions
behind him all raised their arms in the air and exalted with the same “
ha
”
sound as the day before. The ninja turned around, but glanced over his shoulder
at us. “Be here tomorrow at this time. If you wish to join our clan, each of
you must find a four leafed clover and present it to us in this spot.”

“Wait,” I said. “We’re not automatically entered into your
little ninja gang?”

The boy remained silent as he nodded his head. I could tell
from his squinty eyes that he was smiling under the mask. And then he spoke
loudly. “Ninja
vanish
!”

Immediately, two ninjas hopped down from the treetops and
started clapping chalkboard erasers together violently in front of my face. The
white powder of chalk exploded into the air, making it impossible to see
anything. When the smoke cleared, the ninjas were gone.

“Amazing,” I whispered.

“A little dorky,” Zoe snipped quietly.

“Then why’d you say you’d join?”

Zoe’s shoulders slumped down and she waved her arms out.
“Because you’re
new
at this school, and I want you to feel normal about
it. I don’t know what it’s like being the new kid, but I’m sure it
stinks
.
If joining a ninja clan will help you get on your feet, then by golly,
that’s
what I’ll do.” She paused. “
What a weird sentence I just spoke!
I do it
‘cause you’re family,
y’know
. You’re cool enough,
Chase, but if it takes a little bit of a push, then
I’ll
be the one to
push.”

I smiled at the sappy way she was telling me she cared.
“Gross, stop it already. You’re
gonna
bore me to the
point of comatose.”

Zoe shook her head, confused. “That’s not even a
thing
!”

Thursday. 7:45 AM. Homeroom.

I took my seat behind Zoe again since the desk was open. She
turned around immediately, wearing a stupid grin. I knew why she was grinning
and I couldn’t help but return the dorky smile.

“Did you find one?” Zoe whispered.

I shook my head. “No. I looked all night in my yard. There
were a billion three leafed clovers, and a couple of two leafed ones… even
found a
five
leafed clover, but no four leafs. I’ll have to spend the
first half of gym class with my face buried in the grass looking for one I
guess.”

She slammed a textbook down on my desk. It made enough
ruckus
that the entire class noticed.

“Sorry,” she said, embarrassed.

“It’s alright,” said the homeroom teacher as he continued
making the announcements. “And the food drive total is up to over three
thousand
dollars! All the cash and checks are sitting in the front office inside a
plastic container for everyone to see. It’s quite a spectacle, really. If we
can fill two of those containers, we’ll have made our goal of reaching ten
thousand dollars! And you know what
that
means…”

“
Class trip!
” the students said in unison.

When the teacher started speaking again, Zoe turned around
and opened the textbook to a page in the middle. At the center of the page were
two
four leafed clovers.

I was shocked. I had a
stinkin
’
magnifying glass when I searched for over three hours the night before! “How’d
you find
two
of them?”

“I found them
years
ago,” she whispered. “I’ve always
had them.”

“Well, when you show them you have two, they’ll probably
promote you immediately.”

Her jaw dropped and she gasped. “Are you
stupid
? One
is for
you
! I brought it in case you couldn’t find any!”

Obviously I hoped that was the case, but I didn’t want to be
rude and
assume
it. I took it from the textbook and studied it closely.
“Really? That’s…
awesome
. Thanks!”

“Best cousin ever, right?”

I chuckled.

“You guys are seriously considering joining those ninjas?”
Brayden’s
voice asked.

He was in the seat next to us.
Strange
that I didn’t even notice him until he spoke.
Guess he had that kind of
a personality.

“Why not?” I asked.

“Because they’re ninjas. Ninjas
aren’t
good guys,”
Brayden
said, slouching in his seat.

“What’re you
talkin
’ about?” I
said. Is
Brayden
really against the whole ninja
thing?
This from a boy who hunts werewolves and brags about
it?
“Ninjas are all about honor and helping people. I read all about it
on the internet last night,” I said, which was true. Sad, isn’t it?

And I learned some crazy things! Did you know ninjas were
mostly peaceful farmers that lived in the mountains? The reason they’re all
stealthy is so they can defend themselves when they were outnumbered. A few
people bought into the fighting system of
ninjitsu
and went around assassinating people with their skills. And you know what they
say – a few bad apples spoil the bunch.

“No,”
Brayden
said. “
Real
ninjas weren’t bad guys by default, but the ninjas
you’re
talking about joining…
are
.”

I shook my head and said the only thing that came to mind. “
Nuh
-uh
.”