Die for Me: A Novel of the Valentine Killer (33 page)

She frowned at that and turned toward him. When had someone watched? “Dane—”

“
I saw the table. I saw the blood.
” His fingers came up and caught her jaw. He tilted her head back and stared into her eyes. “And all I could think was that I never wanted that to be you.”

His forehead leaned against hers. “Mac was out of his mind. So desperate to get to Ronnie. I knew how afraid he was. If it had been you instead of her—”

Dane broke off, and his mouth took hers. The kiss was hot and hard and wild. No control. Just raw need.

“
I never want that to be you.
” Dane said the words against her lips.

And she realized that her nightmare had become his.

“It won’t be,” Katherine promised as her hands rose to curl around his shoulders. “It
won’t.
”

His mouth was on hers. Tongue thrusting deep. She could feel the hard thrust of his arousal pushing at her. Warm. Strong.
Alive.

His scent surrounded her. Fresh from the shower. The slight tang of his soap. The deeper scent that was his alone. Her fingernails sank into Dane’s shoulders.

“I need you,” Dane growled.

There was no foreplay. No finesse. She didn’t want that. Didn’t need it.

She just needed Dane.

He shoved down her jeans. She yanked open his waistband. He lifted her up. Pushed her back against the wall. Jerked her panties to the side.

Her heart was racing. Her body shuddering.

Dane stared into her eyes. “
It won’t be you.
”

She stared back. Saw past the fury to the fear.
And it won’t be you. I won’t let it be you.

He thrust into her. Hard, strong, filling her completely. Their gazes held.

His hand slid between their bodies. Found the center of her need. Stroked.

He withdrew. Thrust back in a deep, smooth glide.

She bit her lip, trying to hold back her moan. There were no windows in the room. Only one door. But how thick were the walls? She didn’t want to cry out.

He thrust again.

Her mouth opened.

He kissed her, muffling the sound.

Again and again, he thrust. Her back hit the wall, her legs tightened around him. It was basic. It was raw.

It was life.

When the pleasure crashed over her, she lost her breath. Her body tightened, her heartbeat seemed to stop, and the climax flooded through her. Not a wave. Not a pulse. Too consuming. Too deep.

She held onto Dane as tightly as she could and just felt the power of her release sweep her away. Then he was stiffening against her. Driving deep once more. Holding her with hands that bruised, but she didn’t care. She was holding him just as tightly.

Holding on as if she never wanted to let go.

His breath rasped against her. She could hear the thunder of her heartbeat. Or was it his? Didn’t matter.

She didn’t want to let him go.

Dane kissed her once more. Light. Gentle now. Then he put his forehead against hers. “What the hell is happening? I don’t do this.” He sounded angry. “Not at the station.
Never
here. You make me lose control.” His forehead lifted. Her gaze found his. The emotions that she saw filling his eyes, maybe they should have scared her.

Dane swore and pulled away. “
Why? Why do I want you so badly?
”

She didn’t question why she wanted him any longer. She was just glad that she did. Glad that she wasn’t living in a void.

I’m alive now. I’m not a ghost.

“Fuck, I didn’t even use anything.” Shock vibrated in Dane’s words as he lowered her legs back to the floor.

Her knees were shaking. She locked her legs and pushed her heels into the hard tile.
The better to hide the tremble.

She stiffened. “We don’t have to worry about kids.”

His gaze lasered in on her. “You’re on protection?”

Since she’d had zero sex in three years? Um, no. “I don’t need it. I can’t have kids. Ever.” He pulled away, and suddenly, when she’d felt lust and heat and need mere moments before, she now felt…embarrassment.

She scrambled, yanking up her jeans. Shoving her ripped panties into her pocket. Jerking on her shoes.

He fixed his clothing, but not with the same mad rush. Then his hands were on her wrists. Not hurting. Strong. Steady.

The way he usually was.

“Talk to me.”

The light was too bright. Why hadn’t she noticed that before? The light in the room was stark and bright. She should have noticed it.

“
Katherine.
”

Fine. He’d told her about the nightmares of his childhood and adolescence. “You know my mother abused me. My father…he wasn’t exactly in the picture.”

He nodded.

“I had a dozen broken bones by the time I was ten. Child Protective Services took me away from her, but they always sent me back.”
Why?
She’d preferred the foster homes. Preferred anything to her mother. “She was an addict. She’d say she was clean, and maybe she would be for a little while.” It had never lasted.
Never.
“One month, two, then she’d be using again.”

She hated the bright light. Secrets were to be shared in the dark. Not in this stark light. They didn’t need to be shared when she could still
feel
Dane inside her. Could smell the faint scent of sex.

She wanted to think about the pleasure he’d given her.

Not about the pain of the past.

There’s no escaping it.

So she stared into her memories and told him, “I was fifteen the last time I saw her.” She could remember it all so clearly. Would never forget. “She was high. Out of her mind. And she was the one driving the car.”

“Katherine…”

No, he’d asked. He’d hear her story.

“The cops thought she didn’t see the big rig. That’s what they all said.” But they hadn’t been in the car. “My mother pushed down the accelerator. She laughed. And she turned the wheel and she
aimed
for him. I could have jumped from the car.” She’d had the choice. Had the time.

He was silent. Staring down at her with a locked jaw and glinting eyes.

“But I had to try and save her.” Time had slowed down. “She was my mother.”

She could remember unhooking her seat belt. Fighting for the wheel. Shoving her foot down on the brake. But her mother had struggled against her, still laughing.

“We went through the light. The truck driver tried to swerve, but it was too late.” She shrugged, but the move was a lie. There was nothing careless about this memory. “We were both pinned in the car until the firefighters could cut us out. She died on impact.”

Her hand lifted to her stomach. “I had internal injuries.” She’d been in the hospital for so long. “The scars are faint now.” Her lips twisted. “I had a good doctor.” A team of them. “But there won’t ever be children for me.”

He pulled her into his arms. Held her tight. Did she feel a shudder run the length of his body?

Her hands pushed at his shoulders.

He wasn’t letting go. His hold tightened around her.

He smelled good. She
felt
good with his arms around her.

“You’re getting inside,” he whispered.

Then she heard footsteps rushing down the hallway.

“Detective Black?” a female voice called out.

She’d never been so glad to have an interruption. She’d laid bare enough of her soul.

Dane just stared at her. So she was the one to move back, push that chair away, and yank the door open. “He’s here,” Katherine answered.

“He’s got a phone call,” the uniformed officer told her. “It’s Mac. Ronnie’s awake.” Then the brunette’s gaze darted to Katherine. “And she’s asking to see you, ma’am.”

Katherine’s shoes tapped over the white tile in the hospital. There was a uniform blocking Ronnie’s door. He was standing at attention, but he relaxed when he saw Dane.

Katherine glanced toward the closed hospital door. She’d been told that Ronnie wouldn’t talk to anyone else, that she just kept asking for Katherine again and again.

Dane opened the door. “Stay out here,” he said.

She glanced over her shoulder. Dane wasn’t talking to her. Marcus had come along too. The profiler nodded slowly, but the guy didn’t exactly look happy to be left behind.

Hesitant, she stepped into the room. Heard the fast beep of machines. The soft rumble of a voice. Dane grabbed the thin curtain that blocked the bed and pushed it aside.

Mac was there. Leaning over the bed. Smoothing his fingers over the ME’s pale cheek.

At the sound of the sliding curtain, Ronnie glanced over at Dane and Katherine. She had on a pair of wire-framed glasses, and when her gaze found Katherine’s, Ronnie’s lower lip began to tremble.

“Ronnie,” Mac said, sounding as if he were being torn apart. “There’s nothing for you to be scared of, love. I’m right here. I’ll keep you safe, I swear.”

Still looking right at Katherine, Ronnie said, “You can’t.” Absolute certainty.

Dane stepped forward. Katherine didn’t move.

“Tell us who hurt you,” Dane said, voice soft and gentle. “Hell, Ronnie, we’ve already pieced it all together anyway, we just need you to confirm—”

Ronnie shook her head.

“It wasn’t Valentine, was it?” Dane asked.

“It was that bitch Evelyn Knight!” Mac surged to his feet. The machines beeped louder. Faster. “We know it was her! Screw dancing around, it’s just us in this room, and protocol can be
fucked
!”

His rage and fear had obviously taken over. Katherine watched his desperate gaze slide back to the Ronnie.
He loves her.

“We’re gonna find her,” Mac promised the pale woman in the bed. “She’s never gonna hurt you again.”

Ronnie was still looking just at Katherine. “I want…” Her voice was hoarse. Dane had said that he heard her scream on the phone. “I want to talk to her.” She lifted a hand, one attached to an IV, and pointed to Katherine. “Alone.”

“I don’t want to leave you,” Mac said immediately in a gruff voice.

Ronnie’s heart rate spiked. The machines were going crazy. “
Please.
”

Katherine could tell by the expression on Mac’s face that the guy would deny her nothing. He nodded and said, “I’ll be right outside the door.” Mac pressed a gentle kiss to Ronnie’s cheek.

Dane glanced at Katherine, brows up.

“Go,” she told him.

Dane and Mac shuffled out to join Marcus. Katherine came closer to the bed.

“I’m scared,” Ronnie whispered.

Katherine found herself taking Ronnie’s hand. She noticed that Ronnie’s other wrist had been set in a cast.
So much pain.
“It’s all right. After what you’ve been through, I think you’re entitled to be scared.”

But Ronnie shook her head. “Not scared because of what happened. Scared of what
will
happen.”

Katherine leaned toward her. “Nothing else is going to happen to you. You’re safe. You’ve got a guard at your door, and you have one very devoted detective who won’t—”

“Mac can’t protect me. No one can.”

“You’ve been through a nightmare.” One Katherine sure as hell understood.

“Only you.”

Katherine leaned even closer because she’d almost missed Ronnie’s soft words.

“You can stop him,” Ronnie continued.

The machine was still beeping too fast, a beep that now matched the frantic rhythm of Katherine’s heart too. “How did you get away?” she asked.

Ronnie’s lips trembled. “I
can’t.
”

“Did Evelyn let you go?”

Ronnie shook her head.

As she stared into Ronnie’s terrified eyes, Katherine felt her own cheeks ice. “Someone else was there.”

A slow nod.

“You saw him.”

“I couldn’t see much of anything without my glasses.”

Katherine just stared at her.

“If I tell, I’ll die.” Ronnie’s hand turned and clasped Katherine’s wrist. “Please, help me. I don’t want to die.” Tears leaked down her cheeks.

“You’re not going to die!” Katherine told her at once, voice sharp. “You’re safe here. There are two detectives and an FBI agent right outside that door.”

“They can’t protect me. No one can. Not from—”

Ronnie broke off, not saying any more, but Katherine knew what she’d meant.

Not from him.

“Valentine.”

A shudder shook Ronnie’s body.

“He was there?”

Ronnie didn’t confirm or deny it.

If I tell, I’ll die.

“Is he working with Evelyn?” She was very afraid that he might be. A perfect, deadly team.

Ronnie’s lips trembled, then she whispered, “I think Dr. Knight isn’t…a threat anymore.”

“Did he take her?” Katherine asked.

Tears were in Ronnie’s eyes. Her hold on Katherine tightened.

“Ronnie, you have to tell Mac and Dane. Tell them what you saw. They can help you.”

“I
didn’t
see anything!” Anger gave her words power. “I couldn’t see! Everything more than a foot away from me was a blur.”

“You might not have seen his face, but you smelled him. You talked to him. You
know
he’s out there.”

Ronnie’s chin dropped. “I heard her scream.”

A chill skated over Katherine’s spine. “Evelyn?”

A nod. “She won’t be hurting anyone else.”

“You have to tell Mac and Dane.”

“He’ll come for me. He’ll kill me and maybe even Mac.” Her gaze was on the bandages that covered her arms. On her broken wrist. “I don’t want to be on a slab in my own morgue.”

“For three years,” Katherine told her, “I’ve been looking over my shoulder. Wondering when I’d see him again.”

Ronnie glanced back up at her. The ME’s eyes were so big and lost.

“You don’t want to live that way. You don’t want to always be glancing over your shoulder.”

Ronnie pulled her hand away. “In Boston, why did he let you go?”

“That’s the million-dollar question,” Katherine muttered.

“Why did he save me?” Now Ronnie sounded even more confused. “He tortures and kills. Why save me?”

“Because you weren’t the one he wanted.” Marcus had been right. Valentine had found out that Evelyn was copying his crimes. Katherine headed for the door.