Dirty Little Lies (Dirty Little #2) (12 page)

“What’s the matter?” he says, sounding comforting and concerned at the same time. “Are you going to keep telling me it’s nothing, or are you going to be honest with me?”
 

I reach up and cover his hand with mine, twining our fingers together against my cheek. I take a deep breath and look at the floor, because I can’t meet his eyes right now.
 

“I’m scared to tell you,” I admit. I only manage to say that much because I’m emotionally exhausted and tired of keeping secrets. And because I feel so hopeless. There’s no way I can do what I’ve been asked to do, but at the same time, how can I not?
 

I don’t want to lie to Ben anymore. It’s only been a few days; I can’t imagine what kind of state I’ll be in once my week is up, and I’m no closer to a solution than I am right now.
 

Ben reaches behind him and shuts the bathroom door.
 

“Why are you scared?” he asks. His voice is very calm and soft, but his body is all coiled up with tension. “Is someone scaring you? Are you being threatened?”
 

I lower my head, letting my hair create a curtain around me. I just want to hide from him right now. Hide from the world.
 

“Marisa,” he says gently, as he crooks his fingers under my chin and lifts my head so that my eyes meet his. “Is somebody threatening you?”
 

His eyes are intense; I’ve never seen this look on him before, like there’s a quiet storm raging inside, ready to go completely out of control depending on what answer I give him.
 

His jaw tightens, and his teeth are clenched. He asks again, less patient this time. “Is someone threatening you?”
 

I nod. “Yes.”
 

The washcloth he was holding drops to the floor, and his hands clench up into fists, before they relax again. Tenderly, as if he wasn’t just full of anger, he holds my face in his hands. “Why were you scared? You know I would never let anybody hurt you.”
 

I do know that. Even back when Ben was the one being irresponsible with my feelings, if anyone had dared to threaten me, he would’ve made them regret it.
 

“They aren’t threatening to hurt
me
,” I admit quietly. My voice is barely a whisper.
 

Ben looks surprised at that admission. “Who are they threatening?”
 

“Corinne.”
 

On the ride to Ben’s apartment, he held my hand and let me stare out the window. He didn’t press me for answers.
 

Now, we’re sitting across from each other at his dining room table, and I know the questions are going to be coming soon.
 

“I talked to the head of my security team,” he says quietly, even though I can hear the burning anger bleeding through his voice. “He’s coming over.”

I look up at him, and he must see the panic in my eyes.
 

“He’s going to be discreet, Marisa. We don’t have much time to nip this in the bud, but we’re going to, okay?”
 

I nod.
 

The envelope with the pictures sits on the table between us. I’ve been carrying it around with me, which I realize now wasn’t a smart move, but I didn’t want to leave them lying around where anyone could find them. I didn’t want to burn or shred them in case I decided to ask for some help with this; I figured there could be some identifying information on the envelope or photos.
 

Turns out that was the right decision.
 

“I was going to steal from you,” I blurt out.
 

I can actually hear the shocked intake of air as the reality of what I just said to Ben sinks in.
 

There’s a lump forming in my throat, and I have to look down at the table.
 

“I mean, I was going to try. I didn’t get very far, because what kind of person does that? What kind of person gets angry at someone for lying and cheating and all the things that you did to me back then, and then turns around and even considers doing the same things to you? Not the
same
things, obviously, but bad things. Things I stopped talking to my parents over.”
 

I hear Ben’s chair sliding across the wood floor before he stands up and walks over to my side of the table, taking the chair next to mine.

He puts his hand on my shoulder, and I shrug away from his touch so quickly, it’s almost as if he’s burned me.
 

“Don’t,” I say, my voice choked with emotion. “How can you even want to be near me?”
 

“Marisa-”

“I had lunch with Felicity today,” I begin, and Ben sits back, pressing his lips together. “I took her aside, and asked her how Corinne was doing. This whole thing with my parents has been hard on her at school, and I know she’s trying to protect me by keeping the worst of it to herself. Felicity went out there to visit her, and I just wanted to know how she was doing, you know? I thought Felicity would be comfortable telling me what Corinne isn’t.”
 

Ben’s looking at me with sympathetic eyes. “What did she say?”
 

“That she was fine, because she had someone setting a good example for her.” God, just replaying that conversation in my head makes my heart ache.
 

“You,” Ben says quietly.
 

“Yeah.” The tears are falling freely now, and when Ben slides his hand across my shoulders—back and forth—I take the comfort and don’t flinch from it. “Honestly, I didn’t know she looked up to me like that. I didn’t think…I don’t know, I didn’t think I was the role model type.”
 

“Of course you are.”
 

“I heard that, and I thought, how can I let something terrible happen to her? How could I sit there and let someone follow through with that threat? I…” I swipe at my cheeks before I continue. “I just needed a distraction, so I went to see you. I was starting to have a panic attack, I think, or something kind of like it.”
 

I pause for a moment, stopping to collect my thoughts. Ben has lied to me so many times in the past, but the guy I’m getting to know now…I don’t think he’d ever do something like I did tonight. It’s scary as hell to admit to him what I did, but it feels like the right thing to do. So, I take a deep breath.
 

“You were gone, and your secretary was gone, and your computer was just sitting there and I figured I had to try…” I’m a sobbing mess at this point, I don’t even know if he can understand what I’m saying. I’m guessing he can’t, because even after the beginning of my confession, he’s still rubbing my back. Shouldn’t he be getting as far away from me as possible? “So I sat at your desk, and I tried to guess your password, and what the fuck was I even doing, Ben?

“You come to me wanting to make a fresh start, and this is what I do?” He’s still patiently rubbing my back, not backing away from me like he doesn’t want anything to do with me ever again, just…being there for me. “I saw that picture you had of me on your desktop, and I felt sick because of what I was doing. I don’t think I could ever tell you how sorry I am. There aren’t words to even begin…”
 

Ben cups my face, letting his hand slide around to the back of my neck. He pulls me close, letting his forehead rest against mine, and for the first time since I walked into his office, I feel like I can
breathe
again.
 

“I forgive you,” he says. Like it’s easy as breathing. “I trust you.”
 

“You shouldn’t trust me.”
 

I can feel the short huff of a laugh that he lets out against my collarbone, before he reluctantly pulls away.
 

“The very first reaction you had to what you were doing was to vomit in my trash can. That speaks worlds to me about the kind of person you are.” He tucks my hair behind my ear. “As if I didn’t know that already.”
 

I can’t think of anything to say that will correctly convey all the feelings I’m feeling about him right now, so I just lean in and kiss him softly.
 

He lets out a low, rumbling hum.
 

“When Felicity told me that Corinne looked up to me, I...I mean, even before she said that I would’ve done anything to protect her.”
 

“Just like I’d do anything to protect Felicity.”
 

I hadn’t really thought about it like that. Of course he would’ve done the same thing for his sister, and that’s probably why it’s so easy for him to forgive what I tried to do for mine.
 

“I almost became like my parents. I...I can’t let that happen. “

He sighs, and the corners of his mouth quirk up. “You could never be like your parents. Not in a million years, no matter how many people try to blackmail you.”
 

A rush of emotion that I’m incredibly hesitant to call love (even though it never really went away, even after our last breakup - but it’s too soon for all that) warms me, and I lean in and kiss him again.
 

All that warmth cools a bit when Ben pulls away, and I see the hesitant look in his eyes before he says, “There’s something I need to ask you. I just...I have to know.”
 

“What is it?” I ask, taking his hands in mine.
 

“When did this guy threaten you?”
 

“The other morning, after we had breakfast. He caught me as I was unlocking my door.”
 

His shoulders slump in something that resembles relief. It takes me longer than it should to figure out why.
 

“Oh, Ben,” I say, cradling his face in my hands. “No. Don’t even think that.”
 

If I had any doubt left in my mind that he was serious about the two of us this time around, it would’ve been dashed at the look in his eyes when he thought that the only reason I agreed to get back together with him was because I was being blackmailed.
 

“I just...”
 

“I know,” I tell him. “I understand. But I decided to give this another go completely on my own. After this is over, whatever happens...”
 

“I’m not going to let anyone hurt Corinne,” he says.
 

I want to believe him, and I know he’ll do everything he can, but not even he can make a promise like that.
 

“Okay.” I try to give him a reassuring smile. “When this is over, I’ll still be around.”
 

“Provided I don’t fuck it up.” He’s being self-deprecating, and it’s cute. It makes me stop thinking about the gravity of the situation for a minute or two.
 

I lean in and press my lips against his. “You’re doing pretty well so far.”
 

* * *

Ben and I have a few moments to ourselves before we have to put all of our personal issues aside and get to work on solving this incredibly huge problem that I’ve got. Unfortunately for me, the worst part of the conversation is coming, because security is on their way, and even though Ben knows more about what’s going on than he did an hour ago, he still doesn’t know anywhere close to everything.
 

Thankfully Ben decides not to ask me any questions until the security guys show up; that way I don’t have to repeat myself.
 

It’s a small blessing, but I’ll take it.
 

Ben’s head of security is a tall, broad, well-dressed man, who looks like he spends most of his day doing squats and lifting weights. He’s bald and hard-looking, but incredibly nice. To me, at least. He’s accompanied by a much smaller man who has a laptop computer cradled in his left arm.
 

Ben tells me their names, but I’m too keyed up to remember them.

They’re both wearing suits, looking more like executives than the people who make sure those executives are safe.
 

They sit down across from Ben and me, and the shorter one opens his laptop. Ben twines his fingers with mine as the questions start.
 

“Do you know the perpetrator?”

“No.”
 

“Have you ever seen him before?” The smaller one asks as he types away on his laptop.

“Not that I’m aware of, no. He was wearing a hat and sunglasses. I couldn’t really see his face.”
 

“Are there surveillance cameras on your property?”
 

“Just one at the front door. His face isn’t visible because of the cap, but I’ll get the footage for you anyway.”
 

The taller of the two of them nods.
 

“Is there anyone who could be targeting you or your sister?”
 

I shrug, trying to be lighthearted. “Only about half of Manhattan, and god knows who else my parents screwed over.”

“We need to get a security team on the sister, stat,” the taller guy says to the shorter one.