Dirty Sign Language: Everyday Slang from "What's Up?" to "F*%# Off!" (Dirty Everyday Slang) (20 page)

 
 
choked.
 
 
blood everywhere.
 
 
You just gave that asshole…
 
 
a broken bone.
 
•••••
Stopping a fight
 
 
The cops are coming.
 
 
Calm the fuck down.
 
 
Pow
This is what you say to someone when you’ve won an argument.
 
CHAPTER 7
 
SPORTY SIGN LANGUAGE
 
You might think that a deaf person playing sports may look uncoordinated and like a lousy team player. That ain’t true. If you’re playing with a deaf teammate for the first time, chances are it’s going to make
you
look like an idiot when you repeatedly scream at your deaf forward to no avail. Instead, simply ask your teammate what hand gestures you should use to communicate on the field or court; after all, they’ve probably played a team sport before and know what they’re doing.
Some kick-ass deafies have rocked the sports world, and knowing some of this trivia may help you break the ice at a party. Talking baseball? Just mention William “Dummy” Hoy who, among other things, set a major league record by throwing out three runners at home plate in one game, as well as hitting the first grand slam in the American League. Oh yeah, he also pretty much invented the catcher’s “strike” sign—the most recognizable sign language in all of sports. It also never hurts to bring up Matt Hamill, a deaf wrestler (the real kind) and MMA fighter who’s huge in deaf culture. If anyone still has doubts as to deaf people’s abilities, just step into the ring with him.
Just remember this when you take the field: Playing with a deaf teammate may be frustrating at times, but it doesn’t make them stupid. Thinking they are, however, makes you a dumbfuck.
•••••
Sports
 
 
Do you play…?
 
 
I dominate at…
 
 
Let’s watch the…game.
 
 
I’d love to try…
 
 
soccer

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