Disillusion Meets Delight (29 page)

“I would be delighted to have a dance with you.  But there are also much younger and prettier girls that you may also want to consider dear Ian.”  Although Mrs. B was addressing Ian, she was giving a smile to Natalie.  She walked away and Ian looked at Natalie.  She was flushed and seemed to have difficulty breathing.  It was clear that both she and Ian had the same thing on their minds. 

“The pizza is fabulous as always.  How is your side Ian?”  Typical Natalie, he thought; changing the subject to something less emotional.

“Why yes, Natalie, my side is fabulous as well.  So, how’s the job hunt going?  Have you started looking yet?”  She rolled her eyes and took a drink of her beer. 

“I’m about ready to get a job at Starbucks, although they probably wouldn’t hire me because I have no barista experience.  To answer your question, the job hunt isn’t going very well.  I think the problem is that I don’t know what I want to do.  Or the things I want to do, I don’t have any experience.  No employer is going to hire someone with zero experience when they have 50 applicants with years of it.”

“What do you think you want to do?”  Ian liked to solve problems.  It’s that whole Mars and Venus thing with men and women. 

“I’d like to maybe do some writing or maybe marketing, or advertising.  I don’t know really.” 

“It sounds like you do.  Don’t give up on it.  This is your chance to find a career that fulfills you.”

“Yeah, I’ll keep that in mind when Visa raises my interest to 30% for late payments.  I’ll figure something out.  Should we get going?  I can’t believe it’s after 8 already.” 

“Wow, time flew by.  Yeah, I should go get Maggie.  I think your mother was going to begin etiquette classes with her tonight.”

“Oh shit I’m sorry Ian.  If she starts correcting your grammar or use of the dinner fork, please, blame my mother.” 

“It’s okay.  Actually, Maggie doesn’t have any older women in her life.  There’s only so much an older brother can teach.” 

“My mother means well.  I’m glad Maggie likes her.  So, goodnight then?” 

“Okay, I’ll probably see you on Saturday.”  Ian replied casually. 

“Oh, um yeah.  So, I’ll see you here then?” 

“Yep, I’ll be here.  I’ll see you later.”  Ian got into his Land Rover and drove away.  He wanted nothing more than to take her in his arms and give her a kiss that would make both of them combust but it wasn’t the right time.  He wanted to ask her to be his date but Ian had plans.  He just hoped it would all work out.      

I got into my car and began to drive back home.  I am such an idiot.  He obviously doesn’t like me in that way.  If he did, he would have asked me to the party.  I feel so stupid. 

I walked in to see Mya knitting on the sofa.  The TV was on, but she didn’t seem to be paying any attention.  It was more background noise. 

“Hey you’re back.  How was class?”  Her face was blotchy and she had obviously been crying. 

“What’s the matter?  Did you tell him?” 

“He said he didn’t understand.  He said he was going to propose to me this Christmas.  He had a ring already.  Did you know?”

“Oh my gosh, no I had no idea.”  Mya looked at me waiting for more. 

“No, I really didn’t know.  I promise, on Christian Bale’s life.”  Mya knew I was serious. 

“I feel like such a bitch.  What if I made a mistake Natalie?  What if I just threw away the best man that will ever enter my life?”  Mya was a mess.  Her typical trendy pixie cut was fuzzy and messy.  Black circles formed around her eyes from mascara and eyeliner. 

“You didn’t Mya.  If you were thinking about other guys and considering more than that, it wasn’t meant for you and Kyle.” 

“I keep telling myself that too but it’s hard.  I know you’re right.  I don’t know how I’m going get used to not seeing him every day or talking to him on the phone.”  She cried and suddenly my problems with Ian seemed so minute and unimportant. 

“How was your cooking class?  Did you have a good time with Ian?” 

“Oh it was fine.  We don’t have to talk about that.  Do you want to watch a movie or something?” 

“Natalie, you can talk to me.  To be honest, I could use the distraction.”  She blew her nose and had a sip of wine. 

“Are you sure?” 

“Yes, now what happened?” 

“We skipped class and had dinner at Mama’s instead.” 

“Like a date?  Holy shit Natalie!  That’s great!”  She practically choked on her Pinot Grigio when I told her. 

“Yeah, it was really nice.  Oh Mya I love him!  He’s so dreamy!”  I whined and pulled the sofa pillow to my chest. 

“So, are you going to go out again?” 

“I’m going to see him at Mr. and Mrs. B’s anniversary party.” 

“Are you going together?” 

“No.  He didn’t ask me and he totally could have.  He doesn’t like me back Mya!”  I buried my head into the pillow and cried. 

“Not necessarily, Nat.  He has made a lot of effort with you.  Do you think he’s bringing someone else?  Maybe he invited her before he realized you were the love of his life and being the perfect gentleman that he is, couldn’t break his plans.” 

“Oh my god you think he’s bringing someone else?  I think I would die if I saw him with someone else.  This is terrible!” 

“Oh, um maybe he isn’t bringing someone else.  Don’t overreact yet.  I’m sure there is an excellent explanation why he didn’t want to be your date.” 

“I think I have every right to overreact right now.  I have finally found my lobster and he doesn’t want me back.  Will you go with me?”  I ask in desperation while still appreciating that I can incorporate a
Friends
episode into any real life situation.

“Of course I’ll go with you.  We’ll make a fabulous couple.”  Mya gave me a hug and we just sat on the sofa quietly.  Our lives were so dramatically different in such a short period of time.  Life can change in the blink of an eye and I don’t know how prepared either one of us were.

The next morning, Mya and I awoke feeling a little hung-over from our wine binge but we managed to make some coffee and have toast.

“So, what are you going to wear Saturday night?”  Funnily enough, I hadn’t really considered my ensemble for the party.  My stomach began to cramp. I got really achy. 

“I have no idea and it’s not like I can go shopping for something.  Ugh, I’m so glad I got fired!”   

“Your birthday is coming up.  Tell ya what, we’ll go shopping and your outfit can be my present to you.” 

“Mya, all I need for my birthday is a Starbucks card to keep up my addiction.”  Now that I am destitute, spending nearly $4.00 on a coffee seems fairly ridiculous. 

“We’re going shopping and that is final.  Get dressed, we have a dress to go buy.  If you’re going to knock Ian’s socks off, you can’t just wear some ordinary outfit.  We have a lobster to catch!” 

“Okay let me get in the shower!”  I run off to get bathed and dressed for my exciting mall outing.

“Mya nothing is right.  This always happens to me.  Whenever I need an outfit, I can never find it!”  I was kind of panicking.  There was a lot of pressure now.  I needed to find the perfect dress so that I could look 10 times better than the hoochie he was bringing instead of me.  It needed to say
, I’m respectable but totally hot
.  I wanted him to drop his jaw and realize that I am the perfect girl for him. 

“We haven’t gone to Nordstrom yet.  There are always cute dresses there.”  Mya began to walk towards the store as I pulled her back.

“Mya, I am not allowing you to spend $300 on me.  I can’t do that.” 

“Look, you have let me crash at your apartment and completely invade your space.  The least I can do is help you get the perfect dress.  I’m not taking no for an answer.

After looking through what could have been a million dresses, Mya shouts me over.

“Here it is.  This dress will look fabulous on you!”  I had to admit, it was cute.  It was a Maggy London shirred silk chiffon dress that was low cut just enough to show a bit of cleavage but not too slutty.  It was black with capped sleeves and when I walked the skirt flowed elegantly.  I loved it and it was less than $200. 

“Since it has that little art deco pin thing at the waist, I don’t think you need a necklace.  Your boobs are the accessory there.  Hm, you need some dainty earrings.  Ah here we go, some little dainty studs.  He doesn’t have to know they’re cubic zirconium.  I love ya, but not that much.  Oh and I have the perfect shoe!  You can wear Evelyn!”  She was really excited over this.  Normally, Jenna is the girly girl who plays dress up with us.  It was fun to see Mya getting into it. 

“Who is Evelyn?”  I asked confused. 

“My Evelyn crystal sandals, silly!  You know, Jimmy Choo.”  She says matter of fact. 

“You mean the pretty little strappy metallic shoes with the crystals on them?  Oh I love Evelyn!”  

Mya and I stood in the middle of Nordstrom jumping up and down clapping like cheerleaders at the Homecoming game.  It was the first time in a while that both of us felt pure happiness. 

“I wish Jenna was here to enjoy this with us.” 

“Thanks for ruining the moment Nat!  I know what you mean though. I miss her too.  She’ll be back and then the three of us will be able to do silly stuff like this again.”

“Do you think so?”  I asked with doubt.  I didn’t see how we would ever be like we were.

“I know it.  Just believe in it.  Wow, that was a cheesy moment.  Sorry.  I went all Disney on you.” 

“Come on.  Let’s go home.  I want to try on my ensemble and twirl around the room.  We should get you a dress too and then we can watch
Down with Love
starring my boyfriend Ewan McGregor!”

“Okay!”  And so Mya bought a cute Betsey Johnson.  She can pull off Betsey and look fabulous.  I on the other hand look like an idiot.

Each day that gets closer to Saturday, my stomach gets rapidly queasy.  Thursday I applied more self tanner since I was wearing a dress.  Fall in Portland means no tan unless you’re hitting the tanning bed and who wants skin cancer and premature aging?

“Are you going to start getting ready Natalie?”  Mya asked as she put a little butterfly clip in her hair. 

“I’m scared.”  I stood there in my bathrobe and towel on my head.  I had my makeup done but I still had to do my hair. 

“How should I do my hair?  Should I wear it down or back or up?  I don’t know.  I don’t know anything!”  My breathing had grown rapid and I felt dizzy. 

“Oh Natalie, take a moment.  Breathe in, okay now out.  It’s okay.  Everything is just fine.  Sit down here.”  We sat in front of the mirror.  I took the towel off my ratted wet hair and started to hyperventilate again. 

“No, no breathe!  Remember?  I’m going to dry your hair and then we’ll go from there.  Okay?”  I don’t know what I would do if Mya wasn’t here to help me get ready.  I think I would pass out. 

She dried my hair and I felt like I was in the hair salon.  Mya’s mom is a hairdresser so she knows all the tricks of the trade. 

We decided to make large but loose curls since my dress is kind of girly.  I looked pretty and once I put my dress and shoes on, I felt excited with a hint of nervous energy.  Okay, more than a hint.  I was terrified but if anything was going to happen with Ian and me it was going to be tonight. 

“Come on Natalie.  Let’s go get your lobster.” 

Mya and I stepped out of the car and I took a deep breath.  I didn’t see Ian’s Land Rover anywhere in the parking lot.  Maybe he decided not to come.  That would be just the anti climactic thing to happen to me.  I decided that I should stop focusing on Ian for a while and enjoy the party.  Mr. and Mrs. Bonofiglio were the happiest couple I ever saw.  They were both dressed up in their Sunday best.  Mrs. B wore a silk flower on her dress while Mr. B’s tie matched the flower perfectly.  I felt like it was symbolic of their relationship.  Two people in a world of millions that couldn’t be more suited for one another.  Are Ian and I like Mr. and Mrs. B?  We aren’t thinking of Ian right now remember Natalie?  Eek, this is going to be a long night.