Do Not Forsake Me (13 page)

Jake glanced at Jeff. “That woman has been able to lead me around on a leash since before we fell in love. I guess she saw something in me I didn't know was there.” He reached for another cigarette.

“She told me you went your separate ways…told me about the trading post where you found her,” Jeff told him.

The darker, more dangerous look moved into Jake's eyes. “Yeah. I thought it was best to ride out of her life, but I got to worrying about her, so I tracked her down. Needless to say, the men who were abusing her at that trading post regretted it. I took her out of there, felt like an ass for leaving her on her own like that. By the time she was well…” He closed his eyes and sighed. “I just knew I couldn't ever leave her alone again. For the first time in my life, I loved a woman for more than…more than what most men want out of a woman. Hell, I'd been with so many women by then that she should have been just another one along the way. But she wasn't…not Randy.” He paused, then surprised Jeff with his next candid statement, something a person wouldn't expect to hear from a man like Jake. “People think I'm so strong, but my strength comes from Randy.” He lit the cigarette. “Back to you,” he said then, obviously wanting to change the subject. “Do you have family? Did you go to some special school to do what you do?”

“Yes…school, I mean. I went to a local college while already working part-time for the
Journal
and worked my way up to senior reporter. I have a married brother back in Chicago, and my father is a bookkeeper. My mother died two years ago. I'm not married. I've worked so hard at what I do that I haven't even had time to look.”

Jake grinned and shook his head. “That's too bad. Every man needs a good woman, Jeff. You should take care of that part of your life. Have you even
been
with a woman?”

Jeff blinked. “Sir?”

Jake laughed lightly. “I'm pulling your leg, Jeff. Just trying to figure out if I should set you up with a nice, proper young lady…or with some woman who can teach you what to
do
with a nice, proper young lady when she becomes your wife.”

“Well, I…I haven't given any thought to either.”

“Sure you have. You're a
man
, aren't you?”

“I, uh, I just want to be a successful writer. That's where I've put all my study and energies.”

Jake shook his head. “Jeff, when I get done with you, you'll be thinking about a lot more than just writing. And you should know that when I joke around with someone, it means I like them, and there aren't many people I like.”

“Yes, sir.”

“Next time Lloyd and I head out, you're going with us.”

“Sir?”

“You can't write a good book just from stories all of us tell you. You need to see what life is really like out there beyond this door. When I put on those guns of mine, it's a whole different world, and you're going to join me next time.”

“I don't even know how to use a gun.”

“I'll teach you. You're going to buy yourself some trail clothes and gear, have Tobe pick out a good horse for you, and you're going to buy yourself a six-shooter. That's an order. But when I say stay out of the way, you'll stay out of the way, got that?”

“Yes, sir.”

Jake frowned. “Jeff, please just call me Jake. And for God's sake, relax. Don't be afraid to ask me anything you want.”

“Yes, sir.”

“
Jake.
”

“Yes, Jake.”

“Did Lloyd get Marty Bryant off on that prison wagon okay?”

“Yes. Lloyd and Katie are on their way to visit Katie's folks for the day.”

“Good. You spend the next few days getting together the things you'll need to ride out with us. I'm figuring in eight or ten more days, I'll be ready to go.”

“You sure? You said just talking wears you out.”

“I'll be out of this bed by then. I'm going nuts in here. And I don't like Randy working so hard.” He lowered his voice. “I don't think she's well, Jeff, and I'm really worried about her.”

“What's wrong?”

“I don't know for certain. I know she's worn-out and went through hell over this shooting, but there is something else, and she's not telling me what it is.”

“I hope you're wrong.”

A dark worry moved through Jake's eyes. “So do I.”

“Can you answer one question for me before I leave?” Jeff asked.

“If it doesn't take a long story.”

“No. I just want to know how you would describe Randy if you could only use one or two words.”

A look of complete adoration and sorrow moved through Jake's gaze. He quietly smoked, saying nothing at first. “The center of my universe,” he finally answered. “And the air I breathe. No man could ask for better.”

Jeff scribbled the words. “That's a beautiful way to put it.”

“She's a beautiful woman—inside and out. I have absolutely no idea how or why she puts up with me.”

“Pardon my forwardness, but I suspect it's because she feels the same way about you, Jake.
You
are the air
she
breathes.”

Jake met Jeff's gaze. “I had no right ever touching that woman, but I never wanted anything worse in my life than I wanted her the first time I saw her. Our eyes met and there it was. But the situation…hell, she shot me, and, by God, I wanted her even more. That little slip of a woman had guts.” He smiled rather sadly. “And I'm feeling really sleepy again.”

“Are you telling me to leave now?”

“I guess I am.” Jake put out his hand. “Thank you, Jeff. I'm alive because of your warning.” Jeff took his hand. Jake's handshake was firm and genuine. “Don't worry about what might happen out there on the trail. This trip will be pretty routine, other than maybe paying a visit to what's left of the Bryants. I don't want them coming back on us later. At any rate, you'll be with me and Lloyd. We'll make sure nothing happens to you.”

“Well, I'm…thank you. I look forward to shooting lessons. Not many men get to brag about Jake Harkner teaching them how to use a gun. I'll be writing my father about this.”

Jake grinned and shook his head. “I'm hearing the word
hero
in that statement. Remember what I told you.”

“I will, sir.”

“
Jake.
”

“Yes, sir. I mean…Jake.”

“You come back Sunday, Jeff, for dinner. The whole family is always over on Sundays after church. We'll talk some more then. I'll have Randy set something up with Peter Brown, and we'll get some paperwork started.”

“All right.” Jeff rose. “I should tell you, Jake, that I'm Jewish.”

Jake frowned. “So? The last I heard, Jesus Christ himself was a Jew.”

Jeff was surprised at the remark. “Well, some people have a problem with someone being Jewish, especially some Christians.”

“Jeff, I couldn't care less that you're Jewish, and I guarantee my wife won't care either. And I judge a man only on his honesty and trustworthiness. You're a good man, bright, and I can tell, loyal. That means a lot. Trust is everything to me.”

Jeff studied him a moment while Jake still had his eyes closed. “How in heck do you know that stuff—I mean, about Jesus being Jewish and all that?”

“Because for twenty-six years, I've lived with a woman who reads her Bible and who for many of those years read it out loud to our son and daughter. I have ears, Jeff.”

“But—you won't go to church.”

“Jeff, if you're going to get into things like that, you won't get a story out of me. I don't belong in a church and that's that. Now get going. I'm tired.”

Oh, there is so much more to you than you let on, Jake Harkner.

Jeff rose, but before he reached the door, Jake called to Randy. She came into the bedroom.

“What is it?”

“Jeff here is Jewish. Do you have a problem with that?”

Randy shrugged. “He saved your life. Why would I have a problem with his religion?”

Jake threw up his hands. “There's your answer, Jeff. No go home and let me sleep.”

Jeff turned to Randy. “Thank you, ma'am.”

Randy folded her arms. “I'm serious—call me Randy. And what are
you
thanking
me
for?”

“I…I don't know.”

Randy put a hand on his arm. “Jeff Trubridge, my husband is alive thanks to you. You will always be welcome in our home. If Jake trusts you and likes you, then so do I. Nothing else matters.”

Jeff nodded. “Well, I'm glad of that.” He put on his hat. “I'll stay away a few more days and let Jake get the rest he needs.”

“Thank you. You are always welcome to talk to Brian or Evie or Lloyd if you want. I'm not sure what they are willing to talk about, especially Lloyd, but they all know it's all right with Jake. They are all very grateful for you warning Jake the day of the shooting. They know their father expects them to be good to you.”

“Thank you, ma'am.”

Randy walked him to the door. Once Jeff left, she locked the door and went to check on Jake.

“Did you lock the door?” Jake asked her.

“Yes.”

He spun the chamber of one of his guns and looked down the barrel again. “Hang my gun belt on the bedpost here by me, would you? I don't like men knowing I'm not up and around. I can at least have my guns handy.”

Randy went out and returned with the belt and a box of cartridges. “Do you want me to load those guns for you?”

“Hell, no. The triggers on these things are too touchy.” He studied her lovingly. “You sure you're okay with this book idea?”

Randy folded her arms. “I have my qualms about it, but Jeff seems very sincere.”

Jake looked her over. “You look tired, and it's no wonder,” he told her.

“Being tired is worth knowing I still have my husband with me.”

“Well, I want you to rest once Lloyd and I ride out again,” Jake told her. “No scrubbing clothes and doing housework. You find someone else to do it.” He began loading the guns. “I mean it, Randy. And I want you to go see Peter Brown and tell him we're coming to see him next Monday about paperwork for that book. We'll have him start working on a contract and a trust.” He finished loading both guns while she re-pinned the sides of her hair.

“All right,” Randy answered. She turned and he held her gaze with an uncomfortable scrutiny. Randy knew he suspected she wasn't well, but the pain was better now. She still hadn't told him. She wanted him completely well first, and by then maybe she wouldn't have to tell him at all.

Jake finally looked away and winced as he shifted in bed. “Come over here.”

Randy stepped closer.

“Come on. Lie down beside me.”

She looked at him warily. “Jake Harkner, you aren't ready for anything strenuous.”

“Strenuous?” He laughed lightly. “I just want to hold you. Jesus, woman, you've been waiting on me like I'm a damn invalid long enough. It's been hard on you. Don't think I haven't been watching. I thought I saw you bent over like you were in pain a couple of mornings ago. What was that about? You seem strangely out of sorts lately, and it's not just this thing with me.”

Randy scrambled for an answer. “It was just indigestion, I guess.”

“Was it?” He sighed. “Randy, this is me. Come on over here.”

Randy closed the bedroom door. She walked around the other side of the bed and climbed onto it, smiling as she moved closer. “These clothes are staying on.”

He put out his arms. “I just want to hold my woman.”

She moved into his arms, lying across his chest. Jake embraced her and kissed her hair. “What's wrong, Randy?”

“Nothing. Really. I think I'm just a little worn-out. I had a funny pain, but it went away and hasn't come back. You know what that's like. You have them all the time.”

“And I've been injured enough times to kill a horse. I have an excuse for pain. You, on the other hand, have always been healthy, other than the problems you had when Evie was born. You just make sure you go see Brian if it happens again. Don't brush it off.”

“I promise.”

Jake kissed her forehead, her eyes. “I've been too sick to tell you how much I love you, but it was there inside me.”

“I know.” Randy moved her arms around his neck, kissing the side of his face. “Jake, I thought I'd lost you this time.”

He pressed her close. “Only the good men die, Randy.”

“You
are
a good man.”

He found her mouth, kissed her hungrily, then moved his lips to her neck. “Give me a few more days and I'll
show
you how good I am. I'll be good in a very
bad
way. I'll have you wishing I was still too weak to move.”

She smiled through tears. “Is that a promise?”

“You bet it is.”

“I love you, Jake.”

“And I can't live without you, so you tell me if something is wrong, and we'll do something about it. I breathe only because
you're
breathing. Without you, I'm nothing.”

She leaned back and traced her fingers over his eyebrows, down his cheek. “Without me you're still a father and a grandfather. You will definitely be someone
others
need if anything happens to me, Jake.”

He met her lips again. “You take care of yourself.” He kissed her again. “No work while I'm gone next time. I mean it. Not for Peter, and no housework, nothing. Evie and Katie can help you out, and you take the clothes to that laundry service in town. I want to come home to find you rested and well. Understand?”

“Why would I argue with that?”

“Because you're Randy Harkner, and you think you have to be everything to everyone and
do
everything
for
everyone. I love you and I need you to stay well.” Another kiss. “Who do you belong to?” he asked.