Don't Read in the Closet volume one (56 page)

Levi stood up and
straightened his clothes. He wasn’t surprised Shea was involved with someone.
Guys like Shea didn’t do random hook-ups with strangers. They were in long-term
relationships with other men just like them. Guys with good jobs and disposable
income.

Except Shea was having
sex with him while his boyfriend was leaving a message. Levi couldn’t figure
out why that hurt.

Shea gave him a pleading
look. “Levi, it’s not what you think. William and I—”

“I get it. It’s cool.”
He picked up his discarded sock and stuffed it into his pocket then bent to put
on his shoe, wincing as he accidentally jolted his ankle. “Lot’s of couples
have open relationships. It’s no big deal.”

“I’m not in an open
relationship.”

Levi frowned. “Well,
then I guess this can be our dirty little secret.”
 

“I’m not seeing
William.”

Levi laughed. Even to
his own ears his laugh sounded forced. “That’s not what it sounded like.”

He was being a dick but
he couldn’t help it. For a few minutes he’d actually considered asking for
Shea’s phone number, maybe seeing him again, but the call had reminded him of
their differences.

Shea had financial
stability. One look around and it was obvious he had a good job—probably a career.
He liked to exercise. Hell, he probably ate right and got eight hours of sleep
every night. They had nothing in common. Well maybe one thing. They both gave
great head.
 

Shea scowled and grabbed
his arm. “You’re not listening. We broke up months ago.”

Levi shook him off.
“Trouble in paradise? Someone couldn’t keep it in his pants?”

Shea blanched.

Levi’s gut twisted with
guilt, but he ignored it. “Lucky for you it sounds like he wants you back.”

The hurt in Shea’s eyes
made him feel like
an
asshole.

Shea spoke. “I didn’t
cheat on him and I’m not interested in getting back with him. I was hoping
maybe you and I could…start something.”

Levi closed his eyes and
took a deep breath. When he opened them he had himself under control. He made
it as clear as he could without being rude. “I don’t think so. I’m tired and my
ankle is sore. I’d like to go home now so if you could get Whirlwind I’d
appreciate it.”

Shea’s expression turned
frosty. He turned and left the room without saying anything else.

Levi told himself he was
doing the right thing. Shea should be with the guy that called, or someone just
like him. A man that could buy expensive theatre tickets and take him to
elegant restaurants. Not someone that worked in one.

He was already standing
at the front door when Shea came back.

Shea looked frustrated
and unhappy. “Levi—”

Levi cut him off.
“Thanks for the juice and the first aid.” He opened the door and limped to his
car. He could feel Shea watching him as he loaded Whirlwind
into the back.
He was still standing at his front
door as Levi started the car. He drove away without looking back.

CHAPTER FOUR

Shea called the next day
while Levi was at work. He listened to the message on his break and wondered
how Shea had gotten his number.

Shea asked about Levi’s
ankle. He sounded casual and friendly and didn’t mention anything about getting
together or dating.

Levi thought about
calling him back. Thanks to Shea’s ice treatment and tape job, he hadn’t missed
work, which was great since he didn’t have sick leave. If he didn’t work he
didn’t get paid.

His ankle was sore, but
it was holding up. It would be simple good manners to call and thank him, but
he wouldn’t have time. He had to go home to walk and feed Whirlwind before the
dinner shift started. Levi added Shea’s phone number to his contacts. He’d call
later.
 

By the time he got off
work he’d convinced himself it was too late to call. Shea probably had a nice
normal nine-to-five job and would most likely be asleep. He shied away from the
image of Shea in bed; naked and tangled in his sheets, dark hair disheveled
against his pillow. It wasn’t a good idea to think of Shea like that.

The next day it was
almost time to go to work and Levi still hadn’t returned Shea’s call. He told
himself he’d been busy with errands and chores but it wasn’t true. He’d been
procrastinating. He wasn’t sure he could say no if Shea actually asked him out
and he was afraid to find out how disappointed he’d be if Shea didn’t. He
couldn’t seem to figure out what he wanted.
 

Disgusted with himself,
he grabbed his phone and called before he could lose his nerve. He gripped the
phone with a sweaty hand, his heart hammering in his chest as the phone rang
and rang. When his call went to voicemail Levi hung up without leaving a
message.

 
It was stupid to set
himself
up for heartache. Shea made him want things he wasn’t sure he could have. If
they dated and he fucked it up or if Shea got tired of him… It was better not
to take the risk.

Shea phoned again the
next day. Levi saw the call display and his heart went into overdrive. It was
ridiculous how his body
reacted
just seeing Shea’s
name on his phone. He stared at the screen with a kind of grim fascination
until the ringing stopped.

Seconds later he had
voicemail. “Levi…” Shea paused for so long Levi thought the call had been dropped.
“…never mind.” Shea hung up.

Shea had sounded tired
and defeated. Levi felt an almost overwhelming desire to call him back, but was
it a good idea?

He’d never had a
relationship. Levi was a good-time guy, the life of the party. He’d used to
joke with his friends that they weren’t the marrying kind. It had been funny
then, but now it was just kind of depressing.

But he knew he wasn’t
the type of guy Shea dated. He was rudderless, irresponsible. It ran in his
family. His sister Jessie was even worse.

She’d been unemployed
and living with the latest in a long line of boyfriends when she’d bought
Whirlwind on impulse at a farmers’ market and brought him over to show Levi.

“He doesn’t have papers
so I got him cheap. He’s such a cutie. Isn’t he, Levi?”

“He’ll be a lot of work,
Jessie,” Levi had warned as he stroked the puppy’s soft fur. Whirlwind had
looked up at him, wagging his stubby little tail and trying to lick Levi’s
fingers.

Jessie scoffed. “Nah.
Just look at him. He’s a doll.”

She’d come back to Levi
before the end of the week. Apparently an eight-week-old puppy put a serious
dent in her party lifestyle.

 
Levi had a habit of bailing his sister out,
but this was too much. Jessie had been persuasive. She’d argued Levi’s split
shifts at the restaurant meant Whirlwind wouldn’t be on his own for very long.
Levi could even go home on his breaks to let the dog out.

He’d wanted to refuse.
He didn’t like the idea of someone depending on him, making demands, but if he
didn’t take Whirlwind, Jessie was going to take him to the pound. Levi couldn’t
let her do it. Raising a dog was doable, but he’d have to make some big
changes.

Levi had stopped all the
clubbing and partying. He couldn’t go out two or three nights a week with a
puppy to look after. Whirlwind was crated when Levi wasn’t at home, but young
dogs needed frequent bathroom breaks and companionship.

He’d traded drinking and
clubbing for long walks in the sunshine and watching his dog chase squirrels.
Surprisingly, he didn’t miss the drinking or the late nights and he missed the
sex with strangers even less. Taking care of a dog was its own reward.
Whirlwind needed him, depended on him and Levi wouldn’t let him down.

With a start Levi
realized he wasn’t the same person he had been before he’d agreed to take
Whirlwind. He’d grown up.

So maybe he could call
Shea, suggest something low-key, like they meet for coffee or take Whirlwind
for a walk. It didn’t have to be a date.

Levi let the idea take
root. They could start slow and go from there. Even if it didn’t work out with
Shea, maybe it was time to start trying. He didn’t want to be alone for the
rest of his life.

Levi grinned as he
picked up the phone. Now that he’d made the decision he couldn’t wait to see
Shea again.

****

Shea used his shoulder
to shut the front door. He dropped his keys and tugged off his tie with a sigh
of relief. Today had been a shitty day. He’d overslept and had to rush around
to avoid being late for work. As if that wasn’t annoying enough, it had been a
scorcher and the office’s air conditioner wasn’t working properly. Shea was
glad to shed his work clothes as he headed for the shower. It’d be nice to
spend the rest of the evening in air-conditioned comfort.

After his shower he
flopped onto the couch in his boxers with an ice-cold beer and a sandwich. His
cell phone was lying on the end table, exactly where he’d left it last night.
In the rush to leave this morning he’d forgotten to take it with him.

Shea grabbed his phone.
Great. As usual it was completely dead. It just didn’t hold its charge anymore.
He really needed to get that looked at, or get a new phone. With a sigh he
tossed the phone back onto the table. He’d try charging it before he went to
bed. There was no rush. If Levi hadn’t called by now, he wasn’t going to call.

He sipped his beer as he
tried to figure out what had gone wrong. Everything had been great until
William called.

He could understand
Levi’s reaction when he thought Shea was cheating on his boyfriend, but it
hadn’t seemed to matter when he’d explained they weren’t together.

It had been over with
William for months; at least for Shea. William couldn’t seem to understand
that. He called Shea at work, on his cell, even his landline, with invitations
to dinner or the theatre. He’d called twice since the weekend, but maybe that
would stop now.
  

Shea had checked his
messages eagerly. He’d been disappointed and frustrated to hear Williams’s
voice instead of Levi’s.

He’d phoned William back
just so he’d stop calling. When he’d politely declined the theatre ticket
William had accepted his refusal with his usual good grace. “Maybe next time,”
he’d said easily.

“I’m sorry, William.
I’ve met someone.” He’d winced at how blunt that sounded.

“Oh. I didn’t realize
you were in a relationship. Is it serious?”

“I’m not…” Shea paused.
It wasn’t a bad idea to let William think he was no longer available.

 
“Yeah. It’s pretty serious.”

 
“What’s his name?” William had asked and Shea
had answered, “Levi.”

William had wished him
happiness, sounding wistful.
     

Shea drank his beer as
he remembered the conversation. When he’d told William it was serious he
thought he’d been exaggerating for William’s benefit, but he realized it was
true. He was serious about Levi. When Levi looked at him with those dark-blue
eyes, Shea’s heart and body came alive. He’d thrilled under Levi’s touch, his
hands, his mouth. But it was more than just sexual attraction.

Shea had felt a real
connection with Levi. It was a strange coincidence that the day he’d lost
someone he
loved,
Levi had come into his life.

He knew Levi had felt
something too. He’d seen it in his face. So he shouldn’t give up. Phone calls
didn’t seem to work, but if he saw Levi again maybe he could convince the other
man to give them a chance.

But he didn’t know how
to find him. Shea had run or walked in the park almost every day since he’d met
Levi there, but he hadn’t seen him again. He knew even if they were in the park
at the same time, it was big enough that they might not meet. Maybe he should check
some of the other nearby places that dog owners walked. Whirlwind was young.
He’d need a lot of exercise.

Shea drained his beer.
If he didn’t find Levi soon he’d go down to the animal hospital and see if he
could talk them into giving him Levi’s address or at least his last name. He
could say Levi had left something at his house or maybe he’d found Whirlwind’s
dog collar. It was a long shot but worth trying. Shea turned on the TV, wishing
Levi were with him right now.
     

 
After a couple of hours he got up and went to
bed. His uncharged phone still lay on the end table as Shea slept and dreamt of
Levi.

****

Levi spent the day in
pleasurable anticipation. He checked his cell phone repeatedly, but Shea didn’t
call back. Maybe Shea hadn’t checked his messages. Or maybe Levi had waited too
long.

He told himself he
hadn’t really wanted to date Shea anyway. The sex had been great. Amazing.
Maybe even the best he’d ever had, but that was all. It was just physical. But
if that was true, why was he so disappointed?

On his next break he
almost didn’t check his phone. His heart did a funny, fluttery thing when he
saw he had a message. Levi’s breath sped up as he held the phone to his ear.