Don't Read in the Closet volume one (73 page)

“God damn it
Parker!” Jaime wheezed between fits of coughing. “Let me go. This isn't funny.
You need help.”

“Shut up.”
Parker snapped in a soft, determined voice.
Why did I say that? Okay, none
of this is going as planned, but I do have Jaime's undivided attention. Not
exactly as I’d intended, already involved this far, I might as well finish what
I came to do. Parker, you've really fucked
myself
into
a corner this time.
“Please, you've got to hear me out.” He begged,
blinking away gritty dirt particles scratching his eyes, trying to recall the
eloquent speech he had so well rehearsed.

Being held
captive by a crazed mad man, Jaime had little choice, he stopped struggling,
waiting for Parker to speak. Never, in all their years had he ever had cause to
be frightened of Parker, until now. All throughout the day, he had worried
about Parker, after the episode last night; he felt there was reason for
concern. Now, he had conclusive evidence.
Parker needs help. I'll see to it
that he's locked up, where he can't hurt himself and gets the medical attention
he needs. Then, I'll get the hell out of this town. I swear
,
I'll never look back.
Tears of regret and sadness tumbled over Jaime's
face, his heart was breaking.

Rubbing his
open hand through his dust covered cropped hair, unable to make direct eye
contact with Jaime. Studying the floor, as if his speech were etched just below
the surface of the dust covered linoleum. Each step leaving telltale imprints
as he paced back and forth across the dusty tile.

“Jaime,” he
started in a shaky and uncertain voice. “You know, you're the best friend I've
ever had –” A pensive pause caught in the cloud of murky air as he continued
pacing, desperately trying to find the words. “And, I think you know, I'd do
just about anything for you, right?” avoiding Jaime's puzzled expression.

“Yes, I guess
so.” Jaime conceded, in a weak nervous whisper, realizing Parker was waiting
for a verbal confirmation, even though Parker refused to acknowledge Jaime
shaking his head in agreement.

“Until today's
stupidly asinine stunt, I'd never do anything to jeopardize our friendship.”
Parker rubbed his eyes with his open palms; his breathing came in short labored
gasps. Jaime had never seen Parker so distraught. He had always been his rock,
the stability Jaime could always depend on. Now, he was concerned about his own
safety, Parker had obviously snapped mentally, all he could do was helplessly
watch and pray Parker would not harm him.

“Damn it Jaime,
this is so hard for me,” he slammed the kitchen table with both fists, dust and
Jaime jumped. Jaime wet him self. “Ever since you've come back, I can't get you
out of my head.” Staring at the table top, tears tumbled from his bowed head,
marking the dust like thunderstorm rain pellets. “You're even in my fuckin'
dreams.” Parker sobbed. “Do you know what its like – to realize your world has
turned upside down, suddenly realizing you love someone and they don’t love you
in return?” Tears filled his eyes, “I’m trying to tell you – I’m falling in
love with you,” raising his head to meet Jamie's gaze. The stunned expression
on Jaime's face was the very look he had hoped not to see, recognizing he was
loosing his only true friend, the one person who meant the most to him in the
entire world.
How else could I expect Jaime to respond, after I’ve
unnecessarily roughed him up, handcuffed him, treated him like a common
criminal, then tell him that I love him? I’m a fuckin’ psychopath, I don’t
deserve him. After today, Jaime won’t call me his friend ever again.
Tears
streamed over Parker's cheeks as he surveyed his best friend for the very last
time. He knew for sure their friendship was over.

“I love you
too,” staring at the floor, Jaime whimpered.

Cocking his
head, “What?” swiping tears with the back of his hand from his color drained
face.

“I've loved you
for as long as I've known you,” slowly looking up to meet Parker's teary gaze.

Rushing to
Jaime, he knelt in front of him, dropping his head into his lap and sobbing.
“I’m so sorry for everything. Believe me. This wasn't supposed to have happened
like this. Please, please forgive me. You’ve got to believe me. Since you've
come back home, I've been a basket case – it wasn't until this morning I
realized what was bothering me. It wasn't about being gay or straight, it was
about loving you.”

“I understand.
We don’t choose who we love. Years ago, I came out to you, but I couldn’t tell
you it was you that I loved.”

“Why?”

“Just like you,
I’d never risk jeopardizing our friendship, you’re too important to me. If the
only way to keep you in my life was to be your friend, I’d gladly give up my
dream of being your lover.”

Parker wrapped
his arms around Jaime's waist crying. “What do we do now?”

“First, how
‘bout you uncuff me?” Jaime chuckled through his tears.

“Do you forgive
me?”

“Yes, I do,”
tenderly placing a kiss on top of Parker's head.

Relieved,
Parker fumbled to unlock the cuffs.

Standing face
to face, Jaime rubbed his wrists, still stinging from the tight restraints that
had earlier bound him.

Cupping Jaime's
face in his hands, he gazed into the gentle hazel eyes he recalled so vividly in
his dream. “Jaime Duncan, I love you. Will you take me as your lover?”

Growing weak in
the knees, this was the moment Jaime had dreamt, lost in the emerald green eyes
which had filled his dreams every night for most of his life. “Yes,” he choked
through tears of joy streaming down his flushed cheeks.

Gently leaning
into Jaime, their lips all but touch, Jaime's scent filled Parker's senses. He
knew he should be trembling, but he wasn't. Never, had he felt like this for
another man, let alone consider what he was about to do, but it felt natural,
this was something he wanted. He needed to do this to fulfill his destiny, to
be the man he was meant to be.

Desperately
desiring Parker, he allowed Parker to take the lead for the first time in their
life-long friendship. After all, this was a huge step for Parker, one Jaime was
not sure Park was ready to make. Their future was now in Parker's hands, was he
truly ready, willing to take the plunge, opening his heart to the love of
another man? Jaime closed his eyes, if this did not happen, at least he could
hold the memory of this pivotal moment in his mind forever. Parker's warm
breath whispered over Jaime's quivering lips, then, ever so gently, Parker's
lips pressed into his. Moaning, he succumbed to Parker, partly because he never
expected this moment to arrive and partly to encourage Parker to take him.
Slipping his tongue inside Jaime's more than willing mouth, a gentle, tender
kiss boiled into a storm of unbridled passion. Nurturing an undying devotion to
blossom, a love they would share together, forever.

THE END

Author bio:
Born and raised in north central
Oklahoma, attended college at Oklahoma City University where I studied
Performing Arts along with Pre-Seminary Studies. After college, I traveled
around the country, eventually hanging my Stetson and Tony Lama's in Austin,
Texas where I currently reside.

My
first novel is currently in submission and working on the second. I classify my
writing as Contemporary GLBTQ Themed Fiction, ranging from drama, humor,
romance and erotica, all in an effort to capture the bumps and valleys
encountered while making our own way through life.

My
Links:

Website:
http://www.dustinadrianrhodes.com

Facebook:
http://www.facebook.com/author.dustin.ad...

Twitter:
http://twitter.com/DustinARhodes

Goodreads:
http://www.goodreads.com/user/show/52411...

GLBT
Bookshelf:
http://bookworld.editme.com/DustinAdrian...

Selected by Jaime Samms

Dear Author,

Why is this man so sad? Can you make him happy?

[PHOTO: A big man sits
on the mattress of a white iron bedstead, lit by a blind-slatted window. He is
burly, with a smooth bald head, close-cropped beard and a wealth of tattoos
across his naked back and down his arm. His bowed shoulders, his eyebrows drawn
down, his hand slack on his knee, suggest sorrow.]

Sincerely,

Jambrea

Genre:
contemporary

Tags:
hurt/comfort, power exchange, age difference

Words:
6,530

MOURNING

by Jaime Samms

He didn't deserve
it. That's about all Bruno could think as he sat there trying not to look
around the room or listen to the soft breathing of the man in the bed behind
him. Sun filtered in through the gauzy curtains, flashing across his feet and
lower legs every time the breeze blew the light material up towards him
..
Glimpses of bright swaths of green dotted with yellow
dandelions peeked at him from between the shifts of silk. He should get out
now, while his companion was still asleep. Then nothing that had happened the
night before had to mean anything.

"What are you thinking?" His companion's sleep-jumbled
voice came as soft as the morning light and the spring breeze, and Bruno's
stomach did a peculiar, swishing motion that left it puddle-like and uneasy.

"Nothing," he said. "Go back to sleep." His
own words were gruff, shaky, and he reached for the pack of smokes on the
bedside table.

Fingers ghosted over his back. He froze.

"You were thinking about leaving me here."

"N—"

"Don't lie to me." Far from the gripping, demanding
touch and tone Bruno tensed for, Micha kept his voice soft, his fingers light
as air on Bruno's skin. He didn't dare demand. Only one person had ever
demanded anything of Bruno, and he was long gone. Micha traced the green and
gold scales of ink across Bruno's back. "Just talk to me."

"Nothing to say." Bruno shivered, unable to control the
cascade of goose bumps that chased after Micha's touch.

Micha sighed. "Never anything to say." He replaced
fingers with lips, knowing it was the one thing that would trump Bruno's need
for a cigarette. Sex trumped everything for Bruno.

"Don't..." breath drew Bruno's words away to meld with
the spring breeze and in a few moments, Micha had him laid out on his stomach,
legs spread. Maybe there would be a repeat of the night before, with the big
man's tattooed ass in the air and Micha allowed
to rim
him again. But Bruno had been more than a little drunk last night, and even
then, rimming had been as far as it went before Bruno had twisted it all around
and nailed Micha to the mattress.

Not that Micha was going to complain about that. No one fucked
with the quiet intensity of Bruno Kebin, and nothing ever melted Micha as fast.

He should have known sober Bruno was not going to let him get
far.

"Not likely," Bruno growled, rolled and pulled Micha
down onto his back. He didn't have to hold Micha down. The man was as pliable
as a wet noodle, spreading and opening to him at the slightest provocation.
Bruno knew he was being manipulated. With Micha spread before him like a feast,
he didn't much care how easily Micha got him to stay. Damned if he would give
the boy what he wanted, though. Even with his own cock achingly hard, Bruno
changed position, crouched to take Micha in his mouth, and spread the younger
man's thighs.

He held out his hand and Micha squirted the last of the lube onto
his fingers.

Preparation was not something to which Bruno usually went to
great effort, so Micha was surprised at the unspoken request for lube. Surprised
and not a little bit smug. He'd had his doubts about coming up here with this
guy for an entire weekend, however much he needed the cash. Too much time and
too many memories... the first night had been pretty much what Micha expected.
Lots of drinking. Lots of fucking. Lots of hard, almost brutal drinking and
fucking. Bruno was by no means a mean drunk. Just a sad one. Sad all the time,
now it seemed, and Micha had a slim hope he could maybe do something about
that. Last night hadn't seen much of a crack in the shield Bruno always put up,
though.

Despite the unexpected access to the big man's ass, Bruno had
been closed off and silent. Almost like the sudden capitulation in allowing
Micha to go where he'd never been allowed to go before was a consolation prize
for the fact he was obviously not getting anything more personal.

"Pay attention," Bruno snarled, raising himself on his
knees just high enough to glare at Micha and get his attention. Dark purpose
gleamed in his hooded eyes and Micha nodded.