Authors: Tara West
So I decided not to tell them about the accident dream. The nagging would never cease, and honestly, I’d had enough nagging from Mother to last a lifetime.
Basketball practice was even more excruciating when coach forced us to run thirty laps. Even though I was dreading the break, I was actually looking forward to two weeks off from basketball. My weary body needed a rest.
Walking through the front door, I noticed the house was quiet. My carpool ride had dropped me off late tonight. Paige’s mom had to go to the bank and run into the store. Add that to the extra long practice, and it was nearly dark by the time I got home.
So where were my parents? They should’ve been home from work by now.
“Mother! Ted!” I yelled. A surge of panic gripped my chest as images from the dream raced through my mind. I had to see that they were alive.
“I’m here, dear.”
I gasped as Mother stepped into the hallway wearing a stunning royal-blue dress that was tapered at the waist and flared out at the hips. With each step, the dress cascaded down her legs like a tropical waterfall. Her blonde hair was swept up in an elegant twist. Her dazzling pendant necklace and matching earrings complimented her dramatic blue eyes.
She looked beautiful and feminine.
Perfect.
So unlike me.
Just the way my mother wanted everything in her storybook life.
Mother twirled for me a few times, her dress sashaying around her slender hips. “Do you like it? I bought on sale when I was coming home from work today.” She giggled. “Ted’s taking me out for our ten-year anniversary.”
As I gaped at her beauty, a familiar sense of nausea crept over me. The unease of a sinister deja vu coiled around my spine at the site of the iridescent glow reflecting off mother’s blue fabric.
Where had I seen that dress before?
Oh, God, the accident! Images I’d been trying to repress all day came flooding back. Mother, lying on the ground, her blue dress surrounded by a pool of crimson.
“Mother, you can’t go out tonight!” I pleaded.
She stopped mid-twirl and eyed me suspiciously. “Why not?”
Choking on a sob, I did my best to reign in my emotions, to quell my shaking limbs. “Don’t you remember…the accident?”
Mother planted her hands on hips, leveling a glare. “Wake up, Allison, it was only a dream.”
“When are
you
going to wake up?” I cried, unable to mask the panic in my voice any longer.
“When are you going to
grow up
and be a normal girl?” she shouted. “You’re trying to ruin your brother’s holiday, and now you’re ruining my anniversary!”
“Sorry my gift is such a burden to you, Mother,” I spat. She believed me. I knew it. Deep down inside, she knew I was right.
“What’s going on here?” Ted bellowed as he stepped into the hallway.
I had to do a double-take at my step-dad. His beard was trimmed and his chestnut hair was combed back in soft waves. The only other time I recalled him wearing a suit and tie was for his wedding. He was a handsome match for my mother. Too bad they were both going to die tonight.
My step-dad was usually more understanding than my mother. Up until I’d had that dream about Mike, Ted was the adult I went to when I needed advice. He’d always been there for me; maybe he’d listen to me now.
“Ted,” I pleaded. “You can’t go out. A big, black truck is going to ram you into the stoplight in front of our house.”
He had the nerve to laugh.
“What the heck are you talking about?”
Folding her arms across her chest, Mother groaned. “It’s that stupid dream she had last night.”
“Oh.” He flashed a tender smile. Stepping in between Mother and me, Ted cupped my chin in his hand. “Listen, sweetheart. Last night was only a dream.”
“No.” Tears gushed out my eyes and flooded my cheeks. “I felt the dream like I was there. Mother was wearing that blue dress, but she just bought it today.”
“I’m sure your mother has lots of blue dresses.” Pulling his hand away, he grasped me firmly on the shoulders. “Now, listen. Your mother and I want to have an enjoyable evening together.”
“But you can’t…”
“It’s the least you can do after what you’ve put her through lately.”
My heart sunk at the look of disappointment in Ted’s eyes. Did he really think I was such a horrible teen that I’d been trying to hurt my mother? Despite how she treated me, despite who she pretended to be, she was my mother and I loved her. I’d always loved her.
And I wasn’t about to lose her.
Grim determination hardened my resolve to save them both, no matter how stupid they were acting. Squaring my shoulders, I leveled them both a heated glare. “Ted, I’m not trying to hurt you, I’m trying to save you. Walk out that door, and you’re never coming home.”
“All right, that’s enough, young lady!” Ted’s roar shook me to the core.
I flinched, jerking back as if I’d been struck. Ted had never lost his temper with me before.
“Margaret, go wait in the car,” he barked.
Mother rushed to the door, and then her questioning gaze caught mine. I stared at her with a look of intensity, willing her to read the truth in my eyes.
“Maybe we should stay home tonight, Ted,” she stammered.
“No,” he spoke through a clenched jaw. “It’s time we put our foot down.” Pools of fire burned beneath his deep brown glare. “AJ,” he commanded. “Go to your room!”
His anger only strengthened my resolve.
My parents were not going to die tonight.
I looked out the side-window. The sun had already gone down. The accident was going to happen after dark. Leaving the house was
not
an option.
Folding my arms across my chest, I planted my feet firmly on the ground “No.”
Renewed anger flared in Ted’s eyes, before he broke into a wide grin. He eyed me suspiciously while rubbing the stubble on his chin. “I see what you’re doing. Well, you’re not going to win tonight. We’re leaving.”
Mother slipped on her coat with shaking hands while Ted held open the door.
Without saying a word, Mother stared at me for a long moment, her eyes pooled with moisture, before she stepped out the door.
Ted’s gaze passed over me with a look of contempt. “I expect an apology when we get home.” He slammed the door behind him.
I just wanted to sink into a hole. I loved Ted like he was my own father, and now he was acting just like Mother.
But not for long.
Soon, they’d both be dead, and neither would know just how much I loved them.
Not if I could help it.
My legs propelled forward without thought, as if I was racing to save my life. I was; I couldn’t live without my parents. I couldn’t let them die hating me.
My heart screamed at the site of Ted pulling out of the driveway. I had to reach them—had to save them.
So I did what any normal teenager would do.
I jumped on the hood of their car.
Wincing at the pain that shot up my side, I braced at the screech of Ted’s brakes. I bucked against the windshield before rolling off the hood and onto the pavement.
Luckily, I landed on my feet, stumbling backward before falling on my butt.
Ouch.
That’s all I could think at the moment, too stunned by what had just happened.
In another moment, Mother’s screams brought me back to reality. She was kneeling by my side, holding me and sobbing hysterically into my hair.
“What in the hell is wrong with you?” Ted yelled above us. “You could’ve been killed!”
His rage was muffled by the din of screeching breaks, followed by the sickening crash of metal slamming into metal. Our heads all jerked at the sound.
Directly in front of us, about one-hundred yards away where the stoplight divided the intersection, the smashed frame of a black truck had wrapped around the light-pole.
A familiar cold, stale stench permeated my senses, leaving a dull, metallic taste on my tongue. Just like in my dream. The taste of death.
Ted swore.
Mother wailed.
I puked my brains out.
Chapter Fourteen
“Mike, this is Mom. I’ve changed my mind. You’re not going on that snowboarding trip tomorrow.”
Sitting in Ted’s overstuffed chair with an icepack under my butt, I beamed at Mother. She was on the couch next to me, her hand firmly grasping mine. She hadn’t let go since the accident, except when she made an ice-pack for my sore fanny.
I had to stifle my laughter when I heard his pathetic whining from the receiver of Mother’s cell phone.
Mother’s face could have been carved from granite as she spoke firmly into the phone. “Listen, Mike, my decision is final. No snowboarding. I want you home first thing in the morning.”
His whining intensified and it sounded like that time the neighbor’s cat fell in our pool. Mike’s teenage tantrum was cut short as Mother flipped her cell phone shut. I was sure we wouldn’t hear the end of it when he got home from his buddy’s house in the morning. Mike and his friends were all packed and ready to go.
I wondered why she didn’t make him come home tonight. Maybe after the accident she didn’t want him on the road. Or maybe she just didn’t feel like dealing with his attitude right now. We’d had enough stress for one day.
Flashing me an impish grin, Mother threw back her head and sank into the couch cushions.
But she didn’t let go of my hand. If anything, she held it tighter.
I didn’t mind the pressure, though. Soaking up Mother’s love felt kinda good.
“Tomorrow we go on a nice family trip.” Mother scrunched her face in what looked like a cross between a wince and a smile.
I couldn’t recall a time when my family had a ‘nice’ trip. This was going to be interesting. “Where are we going?” I was almost afraid to ask.
Mother’s face reddened and she swallowed hard. “I think we need to go visit your grandma.”
“Grandma!” I squealed, bounding off the chair and into my mother’s arms.
I winced at the jolt of pain that shot through my bruised butt, but it was worth it. What an awesome way to spend Christmas. Visiting Grandma’s ranch seemed a distant memory to me, as I vaguely recalled riding horses and chasing frenzied goats.
Lips turning into a slight frown, Mother’s eyes shone with moisture. “I think it’s time Grandma and I made up.”
I gave her a big squeeze before pulling back and looking into her soft blue gaze. “I think it’s time we
all
made up, Mom.”
My mom made these weird choking sounds, her eyes pooling with tears as they trailed freely down her cheeks.
Startled, my first instinct was that my mom was having a seizure. Grabbing her shoulders, I gave her a gentle shake. “Mom, what’s the matter? Are you okay?”
My attempt to help her didn’t work as her convulsions became stronger. After a few tense moments, I realized my mom was crying—hard. Harder than I’d ever seen her cry before. Grabbing the box of tissues off the coffee table, I handed them to her.
She took the box, hastily grabbing several sheets. Sitting next to my mom, I waited for what felt like an eternity.
After her tears had subsided, she found my hand again and squeezed harder than ever. Pulling me into an embrace, she kissed my cheek while hugging me so hard I thought I’d break. “You’ve never called me ‘Mom’ before,” she breathed.
“What?” I choked out. I’d never called Mother ‘Mom’? Mom—I repeated the word in my head. It did seem kind of foreign. Why didn’t I ever call this woman in my arms ‘Mom’? Maybe until now she hadn’t really felt like a mom.
“I’m sorry, I’ve been such a bad mother,” she cried as fresh tears poured down her cheeks.
I’d waited so long to hear those words. To have my mother finally realize how badly her rejection hurt me. Now, I guess it didn’t matter anymore. I just wanted her to love me. To accept that I was different. Panic gripped my chest as I wondered how long her love would last. Would she wake up tomorrow, realizing her daughter was a freak and treat me the way she had in the past?
Now that she loved me, I didn’t want it to end, but I had to know. Feeling the bile of fear bite the back of my tongue, I struggled to push the words past my tightening throat. “Mom, sometimes I have dreams, visions. They tell me the future. I didn’t ask to be different than most kids, but I am.” With a trembling lip, I lowered my head, afraid to see my mom’s reaction.
Cupping my cheek, Mom raised my gaze to her. In her bright, blue gaze, I saw only the warmth of a mother’s love. “I’ve been a fool for denying your gift this long.”
“Why?” My question was spontaneous. As if it had hovered at the back of my mind for years. Why had my mother rejected my gift? Rejected me?
Sighing, my mom fell against the sofa, while rubbing her temples. “When I was a child, kids found out about my gift. They feared me. They hated me.” Her voice was laced with bitterness as she rolled her eyes to the ceiling.
Although I hadn’t experienced what she went through, I felt sorry for my mom. That’s exactly why Sophie, Krysta and I had promised to keep our gifts secret. We knew kids at school would hate us, too.
“After Grandma moved me to a new school, I pretended to be normal. I had so many friends. Kids liked me then.” She shrugged off a weak smile.
Why did so many people in my life feel they had to change to be liked? To be accepted? Why did Bob take a bite of a hamburger? Did he think I wouldn’t like him if he didn’t eat meat? Coach Lowe was so worried about the team liking her that she ended up in jail. I was stupid enough to blow my game by becoming a vegetarian. “But did you like yourself?”
Mom shrugged. “I was so wrapped up in making kids like me, I never thought about that. I didn’t want you to experience what I went through. I only wanted you to be normal because I love you.”
The damn of tears I’d been holding at bay threatened to break free. “I always thought you hated me.”
“Oh, baby,” she caressed my cheek, wiping away a tear with her finger. “I’d never hate you.”
I choked back a sob, determined not to turn into a big cry baby. My mom loved me now. Time to stop crying and start celebrating. I still had one question left unanswered.