“Drew?” Jimmy asked.
Alek shook his head. “He was dead by the time I got there. Bled out.”
“They got him? They got Tommy?”
“Yep. There’s no fighting this one. He’ll be facing murder charges. Brennan won’t ever have to worry about him again. I might even feel bad for what Tommy’s got waiting for him if he hadn’t hurt Brennan so much.”
“I need to see them,” Luka breathed, jaw clenched, wound tight. “I have to.”
“I know, come on.”
Alek led them to the room. The nurse was finishing up. Brennan was sitting on the side of the bed, holding a wad of cotton to his arm. The nurse was placing the blood samples on a small silver tray and gathering her supplies to leave. Evan was standing by Brennan’s side, chewing on his nails, a vacant, used-up sort of look on his face.
Luka ran to them, hugging Brennan, looking Evan over, and kissing them both.
Jimmy lingered by Alek’s side in the hall, looking as overwhelmed as Alek felt.
“Drew had his ID on him,” Alek told Jimmy, quietly enough that the others wouldn’t overhear. “And his phone. He had all sorts of shit on it, from what the cops said. There were drugs in a baggie in his pocket... and zip ties in his hand. They don’t know what he was thinking, if he was high and just coming to talk to Evan about the charges, or if he was actually gonna take him again. God help me, but I’m so glad he’s gone. I know it’s horrible to be glad someone’s dead, but....”
“Don’t beat yourself up,” Jimmy told him. “Just be thankful they’re going to be okay.” They both glanced back at Brennan and Evan, being fussed over by Luka. Alek would bet there’d be no dragging him from their sides for a long time. “But, Alek—”
“Yeah?”
“After they release Brennan, are you okay to go back to the apartment? After what they went through there today?”
“I have no clue. That’s up to them, I think,” Alek said. “Bren and Ev. I can’t decide that for them. Maybe a hotel room would be a better idea, for a few days at least. If we don’t go back to the apartment, where would we go, though? I don’t think they’re up for another move right now.”
“I agree that the hotel is a safe idea,” Jimmy told him. “You know, Charlie’s place still hasn’t rented out. And when he hears about this, if he hasn’t already, he’ll want to make sure they have a place to go.”
“That house didn’t work for us, though. And Evan—”
“Evan grew up there, wishing for a family, which he has now. Maybe it doesn’t work the way it is. Doesn’t mean you can’t change it. But, look, don’t worry about it today. Think it over. I’ll talk to Charlie in the meantime. If there’s anything I can do....”
“Yeah. Thanks,” Alek said with a strained smile.
Presley and Carter showed up shortly after, hurrying down the hall and looking all around for them. Alek waved them over and as soon as they got close, Carter said, “Oh my god, man. We were headed out to dinner, drove past your place and saw a goddamned coroner’s van, a whole bunch of cops hanging around, too, and I had a fucking heart attack! All I could think was that... but I called Alek and he filled me in, but oh my god. If only I’d stuck around instead of taking off like a jackass. Is this my fault?”
“No,” Evan said forcefully, shaking his head as Carter came over and clapped him on the shoulder, then drew him in for a brief, one-armed hug. “Don’t be crazy. No, it’s better you weren’t there. Tommy had a gun, so if you’d been there and you’d both drawn....”
Presley stood restlessly next to Carter, looking deeply unsettled, his armed folded so tightly, it might have been the only thing holding him together in one piece.
“Brennan,” Carter said next with plenty of remorse, trying to undo the past couple hours, perhaps, with force of will alone. “I can’t even tell you how sorry I am that this happened. I was supposed to be protecting you!”
There was so much energy around Carter and Presley, both, it shook the air, but the rest of them were headed towards exhaustion in more ways than one. Brennan especially was barely keeping his eyes open and wasn’t saying much.
“Thanks for coming by,” is all he said in reply to Carter.
When Brennan met Presley’s eyes, Presley said, “You all aren’t going back there tonight, are you?”
“No,” Alek answered. “Going to a hotel.”
“Good,” Presley nodded. Brennan seemed to sigh a little, the intensity of his frown lessening, but didn’t say anything. “You need us to check on the apartment for you?”
“Maybe,” Alek said. “Luk or I will have to head back soon, just to see how things are going, get some clothes and stuff.”
“We’ll come with, then. Help out however we can.”
“Thanks.”
Chapter 33
A Time for Prayers
Two days passed. Brennan didn’t have his altar with him at the hotel, but he kind of wished he did. Not enough for him to ask someone else to go pick it up for him, though. He hated the thought of being any sort of additional burden. Alek was passed out on one of the queen beds out in the main room. Luka was at work. Evan was around, but that was okay. Making do with what he had, Brennan knelt on the thin, hotel bath mat, with his elbows propped on the edge of the bathtub, Brennan folded his hands and closed his eyes.
There was a conversation that needed to happen, even if it was one-sided.
“Hey Mom. Since I’m betting on you being able to see all of this stuff, I won’t bother explaining what’s been going on. I really miss you. The best thing in the world would be if we could have some chamomile tea at our old kitchen table and talk for a while, like before. This’ll have to do, though.
“I just needed to tell you that I’m really sorry.” He took a deep breath after saying it, letting the apology linger. With a threadbare sort of laugh, he said, “You always
hated
Tommy. I mean, you never said so outright, but I knew just by the way you’d look at him, and say his name. You’d ask me all the time if he really had to come by so often after school, or ask me if maybe I should try dating other people. Tip-toeing around it without flat out telling me to ditch him. And you were right. I was just so frustrated with the way our life was going, how futile it all seemed sometimes. No matter what the doctors tried, it never helped you feel better. And everything just kept getting harder and harder. There was never any relief. I was trying to do the right thing for you, to take care of you, even though I always kind of wished it didn’t all fall on my shoulders. So, it felt good to do bad stuff once in a while. Tommy was bad stuff.
“So often, it felt like my options were just so damn limited. Not just with you—with everything. There was this narrow path I had to walk, but being with Tommy was like stepping off of the path and being free for a little while. It felt good. But when circumstances weren’t pushing me around, Tommy was. That’s done now. And I... I kind of knew he’d be coming back for me. It was his style. The more you disapproved of him, the more often he wanted to sleep over. The more stares we got, the more he wanted to go out and be seen. The faster I ran away, the quicker he chased me. I think that’s why I did all of that stupid shit like shave my head and stop being who I was, like I could leave him behind that way. Didn’t work though.”
He thought of that gun, how real and scary it had been, how much it had hurt when Tommy had hit him with it, the other ways Tommy had hurt him too, physically and otherwise...
“I want you to know I’m okay. It hurts and it’s bad times, but I’ve got good people now, watching out for me. And um... thank you, for saving me. Thank you for saving Evan and Alek. I know it was you, letting Drew get there before Alek, and keeping Carter out of the way, because you’re my miracle. So, whatever cosmic strings you had to pull, know that it meant the world to me, because I need them, and I’m not done here. I miss you, but I don’t need to see you just yet. No offense.”
There was a whisper of air, a slight shift in the heat level in the space around him. The hairs on the right side of his body prickled, standing up on end. Soft sounds tickled his ear and he held his breath, being very still.
From his immediate right, he heard, “Hey, Mom. It’s, um... it’s me. Sorry about stealing the phone from Bren, but I have a few things to say, too.”
The held breath burned his lungs, and he let it out with a small sigh. A few tears fell and Evan took his hand, holding it as he knelt at Brennan’s side.
“I know Drew was a bad guy. I mean, I’m not stupid, but my options were kind of limited, just like Brennan’s. And Drew helped me feel not so alone in a time when I really needed that from someone. I really do think he liked me, in his way, and that’s what made it so hard to hate him. I didn’t hate him. I still don’t... because I just wanted someone to like me and want to be around me, but nobody did. Just Drew.. That’s the worst part, I think. Logically, I know he took advantage of me when I was a kid, and scared me into believing his lies when he took me.... But it felt more complicated than that. I think Bren knows what I mean. I hope you do too. I’m gonna try to not be so stupid anymore, and to help keep Bren out of trouble. I was really,” Evan’s voice broke and Brennan could feel him trembling through their linked hands. “I was really worried about him for a while there, so thank you for getting us out alive. Help us be safe, if you can. We’ll do our part. For what it’s worth, I’m not ready to see you again, either.”
Brennan pulled Evan in with his left arm slung around Evan’s shoulder, the new brace pressing against his back as Brennan held on and murmured, “Thanks.”
“Love you, Bren,” Evan said softly, gently holding Brennan’s waist. “You really think she can hear us?”
“Yeah. I do. I can feel it.”
They knelt there, in silence, for a little while. The fluorescents bathed them in white light which gleamed from the white tile walls, white porcelain tub and grey floors.
Everything was still and Brennan reached out with his spirit, trying to feel Maggie. There was a tremendous calm inside him, which he didn’t understand, and only tried to accept. He hadn’t said much over the past couple of days, and they’d largely left him alone. So, the silence drew out, until the shrill ringing of his phone split the air.
“Shit,” Evan cursed, getting up off his knees and rushing to answer before the ringing woke Alek. He pressed the button on Brennan’s phone as he brought it back into the bathroom with them and shut the door behind him. Looking very confused, he squinted and said, “Dad?”
“Brennan?” Charlie replied, loudly enough for Brennan to hear even with the phone pressed to Evan’s ear instead of his own.
“
Charlie
?” Brennan hissed. “That’s weird timing, right? Do you think Mom made him call?”
Evan waved his questions away, but he looked just as disturbed as Brennan felt. It was eerie, the coincidence.
“No, Dad, it’s Evan. Brennan’s right here, hold on.”
He passed the phone over. Brennan took a deep breath before saying anything.
“Hey, Charlie,” Brennan answered. “I’m still not ready to talk about it, okay?”
Evan had been fielding the calls from Charlie for the past couple of days, and Jimmy had been the one to describe details and specifics. It was the first time Brennan was actually talking to Charlie about it at all. The good news was that after several conversations, Charlie’s level of upset over the news as well as his sons’ ordeal had lessened significantly. At first, Charlie had been hysterical, but now he was just feeling helpless again. “I know, son. I understand. It’s just so damned good to hear your voice. To hear from the others that you’re getting better is one thing, but it’s another to actually connect with you myself.”
“Got it.”
“I’m wiring some money to you, to help pay for the hotel. Jimmy’s been keeping me posted about the house. I can get time off if you two want some help with moving or finishing up the renovations, so let me know if you change your mind. What’s the status with things over there?”
Evan had been the one to ask Charlie not to visit just yet. There was so much they were all dealing with and recovering from, having Charlie to contend with too would have done more harm than good. It was their new family that was providing the real support. As awkward as it was to face, Charlie had never been there for them, so they didn’t want him to start trying to compensate now and make things worse. He had been insisting on financing some of the changes at work, though.
“Presley knows some guys who work construction, and can get materials really cheap. He called in a few favors for the new kitchen and the bathrooms. Supposedly, most of the walls are torn out and the place is pretty gutted, so at least now they’ll have some new stuff to put in once the drywall is back up. New floors and everything. It should be done in a few days. They’ve been working pretty much around the clock so we’re not living in the hotel forever.”
“Good, that’s really good. I just want to see you both settled and safe. You still think this will work for you?” Charlie sounded overly aware of how much he’d failed them. Brennan had heard Evan trying to convince their father that they loved the idea of going back to the old house once all the renovations were complete. It didn’t seem disingenuous on Charlie’s part, like he was fishing for compliments or thank yous, but more that Charlie didn’t want the past fucking with the present any longer. Not all of Evan’s memories of his childhood home were happy ones, after all. Still, it was his place. Their place. It had brought them together and maybe it would keep them that way.
“I do. It’s our home. It’ll be a lot nicer to get back out to the sticks instead of having to be in the middle of everything anymore. Living in town wasn’t the best call. Fresh air, outside space,
inside
space... it’ll be nice.”
“How about school?”
“I only missed three classes. I sent emails to the teachers, to explain. They all got back to me right away and said they’d help me catch up on the missed work. It’s all worked out.”
“I’m glad to hear it. Look, are there any other ex-boyfriends out there I need to have a talk with?” The sentiment sounded sincere, but Brennan rolled his eyes. Evan gave him a sympathetic look. At least Charlie wasn’t yelling. The first time he’d been on the phone with Evan after finding out about Drew, Evan had actually set the phone down on the table and left it there until he didn’t hear the tinny sound of Charlie’s emotional fit any longer. Brennan’s take on it all was kind of complicated. What Drew had done wasn’t all Charlie’s fault, but he did carry a fair share of the blame. So, Charlie should be upset. He should feel awful. He’d earned it.