Authors: Brooke St. James
Jordan had the following two days off, so we met up after I got off work and spent the evenings together at his loft in Bucktown. It was a contemporary space with brand new, modern everything, but it was somehow still cozy and inviting. He said one of the nurses at the hospital was an aspiring interior designer and had helped him furnish the place. My brain went immediately to the conversation I overheard at the hospital, and I couldn't help but assume that this interior designer was also the one that had a crush on him. Then, I reminded myself that jealousy was just a big waste of time. Obviously, the interior designer was not in his loft eating takeout with him.
Starting Wednesday, Jordan had to be at the hospital basically non-stop. He would text me when he had the chance, but he stayed really busy, and we rarely had time to catch up. He warned me that it would be this way until he was done with his residency.
He got off work early Sunday morning, and was at my apartment to pick me up at noon. I was ready to go, so I opened the door within a few seconds of him knocking. He was standing in the hallway wearing fitted dark jeans, leather loafers, a vintage T-shirt, and a windbreaker. He'd gotten a haircut since the last time I saw him, and he looked devastatingly fresh and handsome. I was glad I had put some effort into my appearance. We almost looked like twins in our windbreakers, although mine was a girlier version.
He smiled and sighed when he laid eyes on me. "I can't believe I haven't seen you in four days," he said.
"I can't believe you fit in a haircut since the last time I saw you."
He ran a hand through his hair. "My barber's right down the street from the hospital."
I stood back to let him come in. "It looks good," I said.
"You look good." He smiled. "I've been missing you."
He took a step inside, but stopped in the entryway and pulled me into his arms. He held me tightly and sighed as if he was relieved to have me in his arms. I felt the same relief, and I went willingly into his embrace, letting my body relax onto his broad chest.
"I've been missing you too," I said with my face nuzzled into the place where his chest met his neck. He smelled good, and I felt as though I could stay in that position forever.
"We should probably go," he said.
I pulled back to stare up at him. "I figured," I said with a smile. "I'm ready when you are."
He gave me a squeeze. "Then, why are you trying to keep me here?"
I tried to pull away, but he held me tightly. I was about to ask what he was talking about, but he gave me a sly smile.
"Why do you keep holding me here when I'm trying to leave?" he asked, holding me captive with a straight face. "We need to get on the road, Bailey."
I shrugged and smiled, getting into his little game. "I can't help it," I said. "I like to hold people places against their will."
He smiled with his arms securely around me. "I wish you'd just let me go already."
I gave a little squirm, testing the strength of his grasp. He still held me firmly. "Sorry," I said, smiling. "You're not going anywhere."
His smile broadened. "What can I do to make you let me go? What do you want from me?"
I took a deep breath and stared at him with a serious expression as if contemplating my options. Again, I wiggled a little just to make sure he still had a hold of me. He did. "I've got you right where I want you," I said. "I'm just not prepared to let loose of you yet."
He made a face like he was distraught. "What can I offer you to let me go? Would a kiss do the trick?"
"Hmmm."
"It's a really good one," he said.
"Oh yeah?" I asked, raising my eyebrows.
"Yeah, it's the
I haven't seen you in four days
kind."
"Is that better than the normal kind?" I asked.
"Definitely."
"I guess I could think about letting you go if it was a really good one," I said.
He smiled and licked his amazing, full lips before gently letting them fall on mine. The second they touched me, I felt a warm wave of anticipation begin coursing through my body. I tilted my head upward and parted my lips just slightly. That was all the invitation he needed. He let his tongue dip into my mouth, and I welcomed it. I was so desperate for him that I sucked on it gently, trying to pull him deeper. I was aching for more of him. He broke contact and put a hand over his face, letting out a little moan as if the temptation was unbearable.
"I guess I'll let you go now," I said, assuming he was letting go. As soon as I said it, he wrapped his arm around me again, holding me securely in place. "Nope," I said, "changed my mind. You're not going anywhere."
He smiled. "You wouldn’t be holding me captive like this if you knew I was an infamous pirate."
"Infamous pirates don't scare me," I said.
We were quiet for a few seconds.
"Ma'am?" he asked.
"Yes."
"Would you please let me go so I can go to the marina to meet my friends?"
I gave another little squirm, only to find that he was still holding me tightly.
"Nope," I said. "Can't do it."
"I guess you'll be wanting another kiss then," he said, sighing as if it was a big inconvenience.
"Yep."
"Okay, but after that, you're gonna have to let me go. I've got an important social engagement and you're making me late."
He licked his lips again, which made my stomach turn flips. Then there it was—his mouth on mine again. Every time felt like the first. He put three, four, five, gentle kisses on my lips before pulling back to stare at me. He sighed as his grip loosened.
"Okay, seriously we have to get out of here now, or I'll never let you go."
***
We walked down the dock together. Jordan was holding my hand with one hand and a bag of groceries with the other. He motioned to the huge sailboat at the very end of the dock. "That's the one," he said.
"It's J.C. and his girl Bailey B!" Hank said, catching sight of us as we came near.
"How'd you know I was Bailey B?" I asked as he helped us up the steps onto the boat.
"April thought you looked familiar the other night. She found a picture of you and your hot girlfriend in a magazine when we got home."
He made the statement as if it were no big deal, but my stomach turned and the blood left my face instantly. He hugged me as we stepped onboard, but the whole exchange was surreal in light of what he'd just said. Jordan stepped onto the boat and we all stood there looking at each other. I don't know why I was thinking I could just get away from my past without it coming back to haunt me.
"That's not Bailey anymore," Jordan said.
Hank laughed and punched at Jordan's arm. "That's too bad, because those girls are every guy's dream if you know what I mean," he said out of the corner of his mouth like he was trying not to let his wife hear.
"No, I really don't," Jordan said.
"You would if you saw the picture I saw," Hank said, still chuckling.
I felt like crying. I didn't even care about my own humiliation—it was Jordan's that concerned me. I wanted to leave him just so he wouldn't have to deal with the repercussions of my past. I was already having thoughts of breaking up with him as his friend stood there with a huge grin on his ruddy-cheeked face.
Jordan sat down the bag of groceries and grabbed Hank around the shoulders the way buddies do. I watched as his grip tightened and Hank's expression turned from a smile to a worried frown.
"Chill out, dude," Hank said. "I was just complimenting your hot girlfriend. I thought she knew it was every guy's dream to—"
"It's not my dream," Jordan said. "That was who Bailey was, and now she's mine. I don't share her, and I certainly don't tolerate you or anyone else fantasizing about her and then telling me about it." He paused and looked down at his friend. "We're good spending the afternoon on the lake with you and April, but that will be the last time you mention Bailey's past, capiche?"
"Yeah, bruh, I got it."
"Good," Jordan said, letting Hank go and stooping to pick up the grocery bag. "Go ahead and apologize to the lady."
"I'm sorry for calling you hot," Hank said the way a child would apologize when they didn't really mean it.
Jordan backhanded him on the arm.
"Ouch, dude, I'm sorry, Bailey," he said more sincerely. He looked at Jordan. "I didn't know you were so sensitive about it."
"Why don't we talk about that summer when April went out with Jason Rickman? That was probably really hot, wasn't it?"
Hank put his hands up in surrender. "Fair enough, boss."
April chose that very moment to come out of the cabin. "Hey! I didn't even hear you guys come aboard. What'd I miss?"
"Fair warning, don't mention that magazine we saw the other night," Hank said.
April looked at him with disbelieving wide eyes. "I wasn't
planning
on it, you big oaf!"
"At least one of you has some manners," Jordan said, giving April a one-armed hug as she came up to take the groceries from him.
"Honey, go put these away," she said, handing them off to Hank as soon as she took them from Jordan. "I'm so glad you guys joined us," she said, reaching out to hug me. "Please forgive my socially inept husband. He usually buys his way out of the trouble his mouth gets him in."
"Jordan's a surgeon, remember, babe? He's not interested in my money," Hank said on his way down to the cabin. He rubbed his neck. "He almost choked me out."
"You deserved it, I'm sure!" she yelled as he disappeared.
Within minutes, we were pulling out of the marina. I'd been out on Lake Michigan a few times, but never on a sailboat. I didn't know the first thing about sailing—honestly I didn't even know that sailboats were big enough to have a cabin, and it surprised me that there was a whole interior space. I didn't mention as much, because I knew it would make me seem totally naive, but I always thought yachts were the only boats that had cabins. It shocked me when we went downstairs.
There was a roomy living area and kitchen with two separate bedrooms each containing double beds. Jordan knew his way around boats more than I did, so April and Hank left him to the job of showing me around the cabin while they stayed outside.
"You okay?" Jordan asked after we explored the cabin for a minute. Obviously, I knew what he was talking about.
"Are you?" I asked.
He put a hand on my back. "Why wouldn't I be?"
"Because I don't want you to be embarrassed or whatever."
"I'm not now, nor will I ever be embarrassed of you, Bailey."
I blushed at his words. I felt like I didn't deserve such understanding. I smiled at him. "I like seeing you in your natural environment, Captain Crawford," I said, feeling content to change the subject.
He puffed out his chest and shrugged casually. "Yeah, I figured you'd want to see me on a boat," he said. "That's pretty much the only reason I agreed to come."
"I
did
want to see you on a boat," I said.
He used the hand around my back to tug me forward. "It was worth it, then."
I popped up and put a quick kiss on his cheek. "I'm happy," I said.
He smiled. "Good."
I'd been on Lake Michigan before, but never as far out as Hank took us. It wasn't until I rode on a sailboat that I understood the appeal. There was something magical about watching the wind fill the sails and feeling the forward momentum caused by something you can't even see. Hank was knowledgeable about sailing, and he answered all of my rookie questions with patience. I could tell he was happy that I was interested, and April was proud of him for knowing so many cool nautical facts.
We sailed for a couple of hours before dropping the sails and lowering the anchor. It was an interesting process that Hank explained step by step as he went along. For a guy who had little or no social filter, he was loveable in his own way, and I was glad I hadn't turned tail and run away when I felt like it earlier.
"Looks like daddy finally gets to relax and have a drink," Hank said, smiling at April once we anchored.
"Jordan and Bailey brought some tasty snacks," April said.
We all went into the cabin together. There was a living area with two padded bench seats that were reminiscent of couches facing each other. Hank sat on one, and Jordan and I sat on the other. April went to the kitchen area to grab some food before joining us. She set a tray with crackers, cheese, meat, and various dips on the small table between the couches before curling up next to Hank.
"It's nice down here," Jordan said.
Hank slapped the back of the couch proudly. "Yep, she's a beauty. My dad had to one-up me and get the bigger model right after I got this one."
Jordan chuckled. "The boss can't be outdone by his son."
"What business are you in?" I asked.
"Frasier Fixtures," Hank said. I could tell by the way he said it that he thought I would know exactly what he was talking about.
I smiled and glanced at Jordan.
"Sinks and commodes," he explained.
"Oh, but we're so much more than that," Hank said. "We're a household name now."
April rolled her eyes at him. "We're very thankful for how the company's grown," she said, using more tact. "Hank's all excited because we're in Lowes and Home Depot now."
"Pretty soon we're running Kohler out of business," Hank said.
April rolled her eyes again, which made me laugh.
Maybe Hank was a little rough around the edges, but we ended up having a great time. We sat in the cabin and talked and laughed for what must've been a couple of hours. They told stories about their crazy high school days and asked me lots of questions about softball and my job as a graphic designer. Hank and I discussed the possibility of me working on a new company logo for him, and my mind was already flooded with ideas.
"Do you hear that?" April said, siting up into an alert position and putting her hand on Hank's leg to stop him from talking. She tilted her head as if straining to hear something. "It sounds like the radio," she said.
Hank didn't seem concerned, but after a few seconds, he stood and exited the cabin.
April started focusing out of the window that was positioned above our heads. She stared out for a seconds before turning and standing on her own bench to look out of the window that was above her head.
"It's looking dark out there," Jordan said. "I almost mentioned it, but I thought maybe it was closer to sunset than I thought."
Hank came back down a minute later. He sighed as he looked at April. "I don't think we will have time to make it to the marina before it catches us," he said.
"Before what catches us?" she asked in a frustrated tone.
"It's just a little thunderstorm," he said, shrugging. "It's moving fast. It'll pass quickly."
"Hank, put up the sails and get us home," she said.
Her voice and facial expression were both growing frantic, and my nerves began churning.
"I'm not going to be on a boat in the middle of a storm."
Hank let out a little laugh. "You don't really have a choice, April."
Jordan and I both sat on the edge of the bench, but neither of us knew what to do or say.
April pointed to the door of the cabin defiantly. "Henry Frasier, get up there, put up the sails, and get me home! Your son is waiting for us! You’re not gonna let me die out here on the lake!"
Hank smiled at her. I could tell he was trying to remain calm, but I could see the beads of sweat starting to form on his forehead. This did nothing to soothe my nerves.
"I love you babe," he said. "But you have no idea what you're talking about. We are in far greater danger if we put up the sails. It's a small storm and will pass quickly. We've just got to batten down the hatches and get through it."
She let out a huff. "I'm sorry, but no, Hank. You've got to get me back home to see my baby. Why in the world didn't you know this was coming? Did you not check the weather?" She was growing more and more panicked by the second, and Hank put a hand on her shoulder to try to soothe her.
"I checked it this morning, but this didn't show up. That's how small it is. It'll probably only last a few minutes."
"Those clouds do
not
look like the beginning of a small storm." She paused, and her eyes widened as if she just remembered something. "Wait!" she said, smiling. "I forgot we have a motor! Can't we just start up the motor and go home?"
"Well, honey, to get to Chicago, we have to travel right into the storm. Regardless of whether we use the engine or the sails to move, there will be little or no visibility once we're in the storm. It's best if we stay anchored and wait it out."
She shook her head defiantly. "I want you to get us home, Henry!"
"He's right, April," Jordan said calmly. "Hank knows what to do."
She stared at her husband with a panicked expression. "Do you?"
"Yes, honey."
"Have you ever been caught in a storm, or have you just seen movies about it?"
"You're gonna have to chill out and trust me, April," Hank said.
Jordan stood, and I followed suit. "What can we do to help?" Jordan asked.
Hank regarded us with a frustrated expression that didn't give me much hope. "There's really nothing we can do besides wait it out. I spoke to the Coast Guard and they said it should be no longer than an hour. We'll radio if we get in a bind."
"An hour?" April asked in disbelief.
Hank pointed at her. "April, I love you babe, but you're gonna have to chill out. You're making everybody here nervous."
"What if we flip over, Hank?"
He took a deep breath and closed his eyes, trying to remain patient. "The chances of us doing that are far greater, honey, if we
put-up-the-sails
!" his deep voice bellowed through the cabin, and April winced.
She began crying, which caused him to reach out and hug her. I felt like I wanted to burst into tears as well, but I just stood there helpless to do anything but watch it all play out. Jordan turned to me, and put his arm around my shoulders. I rested my face on his chest, feeling thankful for the comfort and security he provided.
"It's gonna be okay," he whispered close to my ear.
I nodded even though I was scared.
"Everyone should put on a life jacket," Hank said. He went and got them for us, and we did as he instructed. He and Jordan went onto the deck to take care of a few things out there before coming back into the cabin.
"It's gonna reach us in about ten minutes," Hank warned. "Staying calm is going to be key." His words were directed at his wife, but I needed to hear them too. I was scared. I had never been on a sailboat, much less on one in a storm.
We watched out the window as the clouds rolled in and the sky grew dark. Hank went in and out of the cabin continually until the rain started and he sealed the cabin door. I sat next to Jordan on the same couch we'd been on the whole time, and he put his arm around me. He repositioned his life vest so it wouldn't be in the way, and I rested my head on his shoulder.
"I'm not sure how much of this my stomach can handle," I whispered, already beginning to feel the waves causing the boat to sway to and fro.
"You're all right," he soothed. "I'm a doctor, remember?" His grip on me tightened, and I glanced up at him, trying to find comfort in the things I loved about his face. I stared at the indention on his chin.
Look at that dimple, look how gorgeous it is. He's handsome, tough, and smart, and he has me in his arms. Stay calm. Keep it together. Everything's fine.
None of these thoughts helped. My anxiety grew more crippling by the second. I wasn't sure if my nausea was a result of the anxiety or vise versa. Either way, it took everything inside me to talk myself out of running to the bathroom. Thunder rolled, and a flash of lightning shone in through the windows.
"What if it hits us?" April asked in a breathless panicked tone.
"It's not going to," Hank reassured, wrapping his arm around her.
None of us spoke during the next few minutes. We would have had to raise our voices to be heard over the sounds of the storm, which grew louder and louder. I didn't feel so good. Nausea is one thing, but I started getting that burning sensation in my jaw like I was about to throw up. I began producing lots of saliva, and I really didn't feel like I could swallow it down.
"I think I need to go spit or something," I whispered, pushing myself off of his chest into an upright position.
"You okay?" he asked.
I couldn’t confirm or deny that, so I just shrugged. "I think I need to go to the bathroom."
"We're gonna go in here," Jordan announced.
Hank regarded us with a concerned expression as he nodded. April didn't acknowledge us at all. I really didn't care what they thought. I was extremely close to throwing up and I know I had to get some sort of receptacle. The boat tossed violently, and I struggled to maintain my balance as I walked. I could feel Jordan's supportive hand on my back.
I went straight to the small bathroom, taking my life vest off in the process, and collapsed onto my knees in front of the toilet. I began dry heaving as soon as I stared into the porcelain basin. That stinging sensation in my jaw intensified, and a wave of cold sweats washed over me. I hurled again, but this time, everything that had been in my stomach emptied it out. I absentmindedly felt Jordan's hands on my head as he gathered up my hair and held it out of my way. Another wave of sickness hit me almost as soon as I finished that one, and again, I was emptying the contents of my stomach. Once I finally finished, I took a deep breath and wiped my nose and mouth with the back of my hand.
"I'm sorry," I said without looking up at Jordan.
He reached over my shoulder and flushed the contents of the commode. "It's not your fault," he said.
The boat continued to sway, and I sat back onto my bottom, continuing to look down as I gathered the strength to get up and wash my face. The edge of the shower stall was close enough that Jordan was able to sit down on it without moving away from me. He let my hair fall, but kept a hand on my back.
"You're gonna be fine," he said. "We're gonna be fine. These ships are built for this. It'll pass, and we'll look back on this and laugh one day."
I let out a humorless laugh at the thought. "I think I'll be okay in a second," I said hopefully.
"You will. Let's get you washed up and we can find a more comfortable spot than the bathroom floor."
Ever so slowly, I stood and leaned over the sink. I scooped handfuls of water into my mouth and onto my face in an effort to clean myself up. Jordan opened the medicine cabinet and handed me a travel size container of mouthwash. I twisted off the cap and emptied a small amount into my mouth. Back and forth the boat tossed. If it hadn't been for Jordan keeping me steady, I would have surely stumbled and fell. I spit the blue liquid into the sink, feeling thankful for the minty taste of it.
Jordan held onto me as we navigated through the cramped hallway between the bathroom and the bedroom. The bedroom cabin was basically wall-to-wall bed. There was a window running along the head of the bed, and I glanced out of it only to find darkness with drops of rain running down the glass. I sat on the foot of the bed, staring down at my feet.
"Is she okay?" I heard Hank ask from the hallway.
"She'll be fine," Jordan said. "We'll stay in here till this passes."
"All right," Hank said. "Let us know if you need anything."
The boat was swaying all over the place with no rhyme or reason about which direction it would go next. I flopped back onto the bed, putting my arm over my face with a sigh and praying it would stop soon.