Each Day I Wake: A gripping psychological thriller: US Edition (5 page)

DI Ives and DS Lesley returned next day.

Ives told me that apart from Cathy Newsome, the other cases hadn’t received wide publicity but each had been reported locally.

“I’ve been to see Evan Hamilton, your editor at the newspaper and asked to see the newswires. You won’t be surprised to know that details of the disappearance of all four women are there on their system. With photos. That’s what national newspapers do. Collect local news of all kinds and types. But nothing’s been done to draw them to attention within the newspaper. It would be fair to say that any details held about them are just part of the mass of information they collect.”

“But you’re suggesting I must have caught sight of them there?”

He shrugged. “I don’t want to put that thought in your mind, Mr. Markland. All I’m saying is that if you had sufficient reason you could have sought out information on the girls there. But that wouldn’t explain why you would want to do such a thing, given that Evan Hamilton tells me you’re working in his team on financial wrongdoing in the City.”

“You’re still treating them as disappearances?”

He took a deep breath. “Mr. Markland. You need to know this. You’re the only one making a connection between those girls at this point. As far as the rest of the world is concerned they’re missing persons, plain and simple.”

I could tell from his manner that this was something more than a courtesy call.

“So, why are you here, Inspector?”

He looked towards Lesley who opened the folder of notes she was carrying. “DS Lesley has been looking into what’s known about the events that led to your hospitalization. There are a some things we need to ask you about.”

Lesley took over the conversation. “How long have you been using, sir?”

I wasn’t sure I’d heard her. “Using?”

“Narcotics. Heroin. Opiates. Your hospital blood tests show levels so high they were probably associated with prolonged use.”

“I don’t know what you mean.”

“Time to come clean, sir. Tell us what went wrong. You don’t get supplies like that without getting mixed up with the wrong type of people. Did a deal go wrong? Is that why you ended up in the North Dock?”

I was shocked. “Is that why you’re here? To accuse me of bringing all this on myself?”

She looked me straight in the eye. “So, if that’s not the case, Mr. Markland, how do you explain the blood tests?”

“I can’t. You have to believe me when I say that I’ve never used narcotics.”

I looked up at Janet who’d been beside me throughout and knew I should have told her what I knew about the hospital blood tests. Then none of this would have come as a shock to her.

Janet looked distressed yet she was quick to come to my defense. “We don’t accept any of this innuendo. My husband is the victim here. He would never have done anything to bring this on himself.”

Ives interrupted. “That’s as may be, Mrs. Markland. You both need to know that DS Lesley and myself are now fully aware of the details of the events that led up to your husband’s hospitalization. You can be sure that we’ll be drawing our own conclusions about what we’ve found.”

When Ives and Lesley had left, I discussed what had been said with Janet.

“I should have told you about the blood tests.”

She held my hand. “Must be some kind of mistake. The hospital must have tested the wrong sample, one from some kind of addict. You know I’d never believe that of you.”

I turned my thoughts back to the missing girls. “Ives thinks I might have heard about the women at work, seen photos of them. That could be why I was able to pick them out when he showed me the photographs.”

She tried to sound comforting. “Isn’t that reasonable?”

“You mean more reasonable than if I saw what happened to them?”

“He’s not assuming anything has happened.”

“He doesn’t believe they’ve been killed?”

She shook her head. “He says there’s no evidence for that. They’re missing. The more time that passes before they’re found, the more likely it is that Ives will suspect foul play. But people disappear all the time, and often by choice. They turn up months or even years later saying they’ve made a new life.”

“So, like Healey, he still thinks I could be inventing the whole thing, projecting what I already know onto what I see when those girls are being killed. But tell me this, Jan, if that’s so, why can’t I recall having seen all those details of those missing girls, the details I’m supposed to have picked up at work?”

She gave me an appreciative look. “I really don’t know, dear. There’s a lot you still don’t recall.”

I sat back in the chair.

What had I got to do to make anyone believe that the only memories I could call my own were real?

These women had been killed and I’d seen how it had happened.

There was a murderer out there who had killed four times and might be getting ready to kill again. I needed to do more to help their families find peace.

That night, as we were getting ready for bed, I noticed the small, framed photograph of myself and Janet that was on the wall near the bathroom. We’re smiling, looking at the camera. Behind us is a vast expanse of red rock space.

I shouted out to Janet. “We were there. At the Grand Canyon.”

She came out of the bathroom and sat on the corner of the bed, beaming at the thought that I could begin to recall our time there together. “We took a day trip from the hotel in Scottsdale, a small bus with a driver and a half dozen other tourists. He took us out through Sonoma, stopped half way in a lay-by he knew off the main highway where you bought me this.”

She pointed to the beaded necklace round her neck. Colored stones, fashioned with skill and understanding of the world they came from, beautiful. A Native American necklace.

Janet took it off and handed it to me.

I held the necklace, felt it real in my hands. “They were Indians, selling wonderful objects. Nothing like the commercial stuff they try to palm you off with in the so called reservation stores.”

“I wanted to buy one of their pots.”

“But we couldn’t see how we’d get it back over here without breaking it.”

She came closer and hugged me. “You see, you do remember.”

I pointed to the photograph. “And we travelled on towards the Grand Canyon. Stopped to look down, right down, to see white water rafters like specks below us negotiating the Colorado River. And then on to the Canyon itself. Where this photo was taken.”

“Where you told me you were scared of heights.”

I smiled for what felt like the first time ever. “And open spaces.”

“You just told me that to avoid the helicopter tour.”

“I’ve never liked helicopters. When they go down, they go down.”

She gave me another hug. “And do you remember what we promised?”

I surprised myself. “That we’d come back to this wonderful place one day and we’d stay in that big green and white hotel on the edge of the Canyon.”

She smiled. “We will do that. We’ll return. We’ll stay in that hotel. Once you’re better.”

It was a small step but one that filled me with real optimism.

I wouldn’t forever have to learn my past as if I was another. With Janet’s help, and given time, I would remember.

Remember it all.

When Evan Hamilton called he couldn’t hide the fact that the time he’d spent traveling up from London and sitting with me here in Lichfield was something a busy newspaper editor just didn’t have.

“You shouldn’t have come, Evan. I know the deadlines won’t wait.”

He opened wide his hands. “Screw the deadlines. We’re all concerned, Tom.”

“They tell me I’m making progress. I want to get back.”

“But how do you feel? You know I had a visit from the police?”

“DI Ives?”

“He wanted to know about missing young women, about what information the paper held on them. I told him that as far as I knew they’d never once been on our radar. He was concerned to find out if we’d done anything to connect the four cases but I told him I was sure we hadn’t and he could find nothing to suggest that we had. So he left it at that. There’s nothing I need to know about this, is there, Tom?”

I considered telling him about the visions of the four girls being killed but decided he wouldn’t understand. Ives must have told him that I’d come forward with their names. “There’s nothing, Evan.”

I could tell he suspected there was something I wasn’t telling him and for the first time I understood the real reason for his visit. “Well if anything breaks on this, anything that might affect the newspaper, you need to let me know, as soon as.”

I nodded. “Evan. You can depend on me.”

“That’s one thing I’m sure of, Tom. You remain a key man. That’s why I was so keen to see you come on board as part of the team. You’re important to us. But, for the time being, you stay here.”

“I think I’m strong enough to come back. I’ll be honest, Evan. I need to get back to
The
Herald
. I need to make sense of what’s been happening.”

He stared back without any sign of changing his mind. “That’s final, Tom. You stay here until you’re well enough. Understand?”

We talked for another hour, most of it to encourage me to keep making progress with my recovery. But though I was grateful for the help he was giving me, I couldn’t stop asking myself why he was so determined to make sure I stayed in Lichfield.

Next day, Janet handed me the phone.

“It’s for you.”

I listened.

“Tom, it’s me, Jason. Jason Blair.”

I was thinking back to the images on Janet’s tablet. My colleague, Jason Blair. The one for whom nothing is safe in a skirt. I tried my hardest to believe that I knew him but I was working from what Janet had told me, little more. I pretended. “Jason, good to hear from you.”

“I wanted to let you know that we’re all thinking of you. Wishing you well in this tough time.”

“What have they told you?”

He lowered his voice. “They thought they’d lost you. You’ve have, well, memory problems.”

I bridled at the thought that they would think of me this way. But I knew I should expect nothing less. The newspaper game is ruthless and competitive. The world moves on each day in its own precarious and often baffling way. The need to observe, comment on and analyze that unpredictable perpetual motion couldn’t wait for any one individual, however important or otherwise they may take themselves to be.

It wasn’t going to do me any good to play the invalid in the eyes of my colleagues, I knew that. The ride is too wild and unfathomable to carry passengers. If, despite what Hamilton said, I was ever going to re-establish myself in my old job, I had to rule out such perceptions.

I took the first step along that path. “I’m OK now. Wanting to get back.”

He grunted. I hoped that meant he believed me.

I went over in my mind what I’d learned from reading the articles that Janet had collected. It was precious little. I knew it was going to be difficult to hold my own in talking with Jason but I had to try.

“Does Hamilton know you’re calling me?”

He coughed. “What he doesn’t know won’t hurt him. And anyway, why wouldn’t I want to talk with an old friend and colleague?”

“You’ve made progress while I’ve been away?”

“Well, we’re still not there, to be honest, Tom. And not just because we’ve been without you. It’s gone quiet all over. No one’s saying a thing. We still haven’t nailed Montague.”

In my mind’s eye, I was scanning through the articles Janet saved for me while trying to make it sound to Blair that I knew this for real. “Montague’s still standing?”

“Worse than that, he’s expanding. OAM has just completed a successful takeover of Wild Cherry. Cost them eleven million. It’s like Montague’s sticking up two fingers and saying
how could I mastermind a takeover that’s been through this level of due diligence if I’m involved in anything shady?
And he has a point. How was he able to get away with the takeover if he’s skimming off from the company like we think he is? Must be working Albert Emery, that pet auditor of his, twenty-four-seven.”

I was delving back into what I knew from the press cuttings again. Albert Emery, small, round-spectacled, respectable looking. “Emery?”

Blair nodded. “Indeed. We’re sure he’s still cooking the books but once again there’s a wall of silence. Everyone’s too scared to speak because of Quinn.”

I’d picked up nothing on anyone of this name from Janet’s articles. “Quinn? I need a refresher.”

Jason Blair took a little too long to reply, meaning that he needed time to hide his surprise at my question, but what he said was helpful. “You remember. Mike Quinn. Son of East End hard man Charlie Quinn. Quinn senior wanted something better than he himself ever had and opened doors in the City for his offspring. The problem was that Quinn junior didn’t want to shake off the strong arm habits of his father and now has a reputation as an enforcer who collects with ruthlessness and violence. The word is out that Mike Quinn and Tyrone Montague are hand in glove but proof of wrongdoing is hard to find.”

I passed off the lapse as best I could. “Of course.”

“We’ve been receiving threats from Quinn and his men. There are those who blame him for what happened to you. But no one’s talking. There’s a climate of fear, even in the office.”

Another reason, perhaps, why Hamilton had no interest in my rejoining the team. That could mean he wanted to protect me. Or that he’d been frightened.

I struggled to build a picture of Quinn in my mind. If he’d been behind my accident, surely I would be able to visualize the man. But nothing came. “But there’s no evidence that he was involved in what happened to me?”

“Nothing that definite. Seems you’re the only witness.”

“Place me.”

He sounded surprised. “What do you mean?”

“Take me through what you know about what we were doing before the accident.”

“If it helps. We were paying Tyrone Montague a visit out at Canary Wharf. Montague had finally agreed to an interview. We had no expectation that he was about to admit anything but it’s no exaggeration to say we were disappointed by what we found. He had an answer to everything we put to him. He gave away nothing. Looking back, we shouldn’t have been surprised. His reputation as one of the most slippery customers in the City wasn’t earned for nothing.”

“And that’s all that happened? We just walked away?”

“Yes, that’s about it. We left with our tail between our legs.”

“And that’s the last time you saw me?”

“Yes. Next day you didn’t show in the office. Ten days later we heard you’d been pulled out of West India Quay.”