Elite Ambition (10 page)

“She might not,” Jacob said, touching my arm. “But
whatever happens—she needed to know the truth and you deserve to have your name cleared. It's not fair to you and it never was.” He stared down at the cobblestones beneath us, then looked back at me. “I should have done something about it a long time ago. I'm sorry, Sasha. I don't know if I can apologize enough.”

“Stop.” I reached over and squeezed his hand for a second before letting him go. “We've been over this. You did what I asked. It's what I wanted. I should be the one apologizing to you—you need to do what feels right.”

“How about we both agree to stop apologizing to each other, okay?” Jacob asked. His smile was soft.

“Okay,” I said, taking a deep breath. “I can do that.”

We stared at each other for minutes—neither of us saying a word. Silence was comfortable for both of us. Our bodies were inches apart, and it was almost impossible not to hug him.

Or kiss him.

More than anything—that's what I wanted to do.

“I better go,” I said, reluctant. My voice broke the silence. I hated saying it, but it had to happen. No one could see us here.

A look—maybe sadness—crossed Jacob's face. But
it was replaced with understanding. “I get it,” he said. “We're doing it right this time.”

But the way he looked at me—I just knew. He wanted to kiss me. And, more than anything, I wanted to kiss him back.

“Right,” I said. I took a tiny step back. The longer I was closer to him—the harder it was to step away.

“Text you later,” Jacob said, squeezing my arm then letting me go. I half wished he'd kept his hand on my arm and forced me to stay. But we both knew better.

“Okay. Bye.” I tore my eyes away from his and left the archway, leaving him standing there.

Hours later, I sat down to dinner in the caf. My brain was still stuck on what had gone on earlier with Jacob. The scene kept replaying in front of my eyes—the light breeze that had blown the scent of fresh cut grass through the archway, the warmth that seemed to radiate from Jacob's body and—what I couldn't forget no matter how hard I tried—the way he'd looked when I'd approached him. I couldn't help but worry about the timing of everything. Jacob was telling Callie the truth before the schooling show, which was important to her. I blinked and flashed back to when I'd been testing for the YENT and had
found out that Callie and Jacob were together. It had almost ruined my chances at making the team. I didn't want this show to be a mess for Callie. Not after I knew how it felt.

I stirred my wonton soup, usually one of my faves when the caf served Chinese food. But today I was unable to focus enough to eat without spilling soup down my shirt.

“Everything okay?” Paige asked. She finished her third pork dumpling and wiped her mouth.

“Totally fine,” I said. I directed my gaze from my soup to Paige's face. “I had a big lunch.”

Paige nodded. “Gotcha. I did, too, but I love Chinese food so much and …”

She kept talking but her words stopped registering in my brain when I saw two people walk through the doorway.

Eric. Rachel.

Something overwhelming came over me—I couldn't sit another second without talking to Eric. I had no idea what to even say, but I couldn't stop myself.

“I'll be right back,” I said to Paige.

“Okaaay,” she said. “Are you all right?”

“Great,” I said. “I'll just … be right back.”

And without explanation, I got up and headed for Eric
and Rachel. They approached the lunch line, whispering to each other as they got closer. Eric, with his light brown skin and dark hair, looked more ready for a casting call than class. Rachel had a classic girl-next-door look—pretty and petite with light brown hair and natural reddish highlights.

“Hi,” I said to both of them.

“Hey,” Eric and Rachel said, both smiling at me. I didn't pick up on a hit of weirdness or jealousy from Rachel that I was talking to my ex.

“I'm going to grab my tray,” Rachel said, laughing. “There's no way I'm missing any of the sweet-and-sour chicken.” Maybe she knew I wanted a minute alone with Eric. Rachel and I weren't even close to friends, but she was being gracious. I don't know if I could handle myself as well as she was in this situation.

Eric smiled at Rachel. “Be right there.”

We looked at each other, my nerves started to calm the longer I looked at him.

“How're you doing?” Eric asked. His dark brown eyes, gentle like always, were sincere as he looked at me.

“Good,” I said. “Fall break was fun. How about you?”

“Busy,” he said, brushing back his dark brown hair. “I'm riding Luna as much as I can. Sometimes it feels like I'm living in the stable.”

I laughed. “Tell me about it. I think Charm was secretly glad to see me go over break.”

“No, never.” Eric joined my laughter.

I shifted, swallowing. “I didn't mean to interrupt your lunch. I just wanted to say that you've always been such a great friend to me. I miss seeing you.”

“I miss talking to you too,” Eric said.

“You're a good guy, and I don't want things to be weird between us. I'm—” The next part was harder to get out. “I'm glad you've got Rachel. She seems cool and I want you to be happy. I just hope … that, somehow, we can still be friends.”

The last part of the sentence gushed out. But I meant it. I needed Eric in my life. No more drama. Or wars between Jacob and Eric. Just all of us coexisting at school and getting back to our normal lives.

“I want that, too, Sasha,” Eric said. He glanced at the cafeteria floor, then back at me. “We both went through rough things. Maybe the timing wasn't right for us—I don't know. But I care about you as a friend. I want to talk. The avoiding-each-other thing is ridiculous.”

Relief dizzied me—almost forcing me to grab the table beside me.

“I'm so glad you feel that way. Really. And I want to know how riding's going. Maybe we can, I don't know, practice together sometime or something?”

Eric nodded. “I'd love that. Luna misses Charm—you know she had a crush on him.”

We both laughed. “It was mutual,” I said. “Well, go grab lunch, and I'll see you around.”

Eric and I traded smiles. As I walked back to rejoin Paige, I felt better about the possibilities of the future than I had in weeks. Eric and I were on track to becoming friends. Paige and I
would
get back our super-BFF status. Jacob and I were going to start dating. And, either the best or the worst of all of these things, Callie would know the truth—in less than four days.

 11 

QUEEN OF DRESSAGE

WEDNESDAY AFTERNOON'S RIDING LESSON couldn't come fast enough. It was only the third day back to class, but it felt like break hadn't even happened and I'd been studying fractions and American history
forever.
All I wanted to do was ride.

I pushed open the tack room door and found Brit inside, wiping off the cantle of her saddle.

“Hey,” I said. “Ready for another ‘easy' lesson at Canterwood?”

Brit grinned, putting her saddle cloth in a nearby bucket. “You know it. I mean, c'mon. Mr. Conner needs to step up the difficulty a little.”

“He totally does,” I said, laughing. We picked up our tack and, together, walked out of the tack room.

“How're your classes?” I asked. “Those supereasy too?”

Brit groaned. “Seriously. I might drown in homework. Were you overwhelmed when you came here?”

“That's an understatement,” I said. “I was
beyond
overwhelmed. I had no friends, the classes were superintimidating, and I was trying to make the advanced riding team.”

Brit shifted the bridle on her shoulder. “How did you get through it? I'm kind of scared that I won't make it with grades
and
riding.”

“You can,” I said, looking at her. “There were a million times when I got here that I wanted to quit and go home. But I finally learned how to juggle everything—it just took time. Same for you, I'm sure. Just give it a little while and you'll see.”

That seemed to put Brit at ease. She smiled, the worry gone from her eyes. “Thanks, Sasha. That really makes me feel better, especially coming from someone who's gone through it.”

“No problem. And if you need help with classes, let me know. If I can't help, I'm sure I know someone who can.”

“I definitely will.”

We smiled at each other, and Brit reached Apollo's stall.
“Hey, want to grab dinner tonight? I heard about this pizza place on campus that sounds
so
good.”

“The Slice is awesome,” I said. “Meet you there around seven?”

“Perfect.”

I left Brit with Apollo and headed to see Charm. I put down his tack on his trunk, and he stuck his head over the door, watching me.

“What's up, guy?” I asked him. “Ready for our lesson?”

Charm blinked, seeming to contemplate my question.

“Oh,” I said, my tone teasing. “You thought I was coming to turn you out, huh?”

“Turn out” were words Charm understood. He bobbed his head, flapping his lower lip. I laughed. “Sorry. No grazing right now. You can do that tomorrow while I'm in class.”

I opened the stall door, leading him into the aisle. I clipped him into a pair of crossties and took his tack box from the trunk.

It only took a few minutes to groom him—he hadn't rolled outside or gotten dusty since this morning's grooming. After tacking him up and putting on my helmet, I led him to the indoor arena.

We were the first ones inside, soon followed by
Heather and then Brit. Each of us focused on warming up our horse—no one said a word. Heather had switched Aristocrat's usually white saddle pad for a hunter green one that made the chestnut's coat look even darker.

We walked and trotted the horses for almost fifteen minutes before Mr. Conner walked inside.

“Hello, everyone,” he said with a nod. “It's good to see you all here.”

We echoed back hellos and waited for instruction from him.

“Today,” Mr. Conner said. “We're going to work on dressage.”

I didn't need to look at Brit to know she was smiling. Dressage was her favorite discipline, and she hadn't had a chance to show off her skills yet. I couldn't wait to see her and Apollo in action.

“Sitting trot, everyone,” Mr. Conner said.

Brit, Heather, and I all sat to our horses' trots, and I noticed how smooth Brit was in the saddle. She barely moved at all.

“Change directions,” Mr. Conner called.

We crossed over the center of the arena. Brit sat for a beat to stay on the right diagonal, and Apollo went right to the opposite rail like he was supposed to. I couldn't
stop watching Brit—her hands were still, her legs stayed in the correct position and her shoulders were back, but her back wasn't ramrod straight.

And, by the end of the lesson, I still hadn't seen any mistakes. Brit and Apollo had been stars in every area Mr. Conner put us though—from a working trot to half-passes. I hadn't seen anyone do dressage moves like that since I'd watched Callie ride. Brit's skills in the saddle were something I think even Heather had to marvel at.

“That was a great lesson,” Mr. Conner said. “I expect all of you to work on the areas we discussed. You're all progressing in the direction I'd hoped for the schooling show. I have no doubt that Mr. Nicholson will be impressed with all of your hard work.”

The last sentence eased some of the anxiety in my chest. Mr. Conner didn't just say things he didn't mean. If he thought we weren't going to be ready or if he had concerns about the show, he'd be telling us. But what he said made me hopeful that if Charm and I kept working at the pace we did, we'd be prepared for Sunday's show.

“Cool down your horses, and I'll see you tomorrow,” Mr. Conner said.