Elizabeth C. Main - Jane Serrano 02 - No Rest for the Wicked (22 page)

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Authors: Elizabeth C. Main

Tags: #Mystery: Cozy - Bookstore - Oregon


You can tell them to offer their help directly to Arnie.


I’m not that mean. Arnie has enough problems.


Let’s go finish that wine
.

Alix stubbed out her cigarette in a sand bucket hidden behind a blooming ornamental cherry tree and led the way.

How about the way Bianca and
Tyler managed
that wedding today
? And Wendell, bless his furry little heart. When we steer him clear of porcupines and appetizer trays, he’s all right.


You’ve got yourself a unique set of
wedding
assistants, that’s for sure.
H
eard
about Tyler’s problem
yet
?


His mother
again
?


Her, too, but right now it’s Laurence. Tyler’s afraid his memory’s going.


What are you talking about? That old man’s mind is sharper than most.


That’s what I think, but
he’s been doing some odd things, getting secret calls.
He even met a man on the street who appeared to threaten him, and lied to Tyler about it, so Tyler wonders whether he’s somehow mixed up with a con man.


That poor kid.
Could
it
have been Hunter?


No, this happened after the murder. We were trying to
decide
whether to
tell
Arnie
, give him somebody else to chase besides you
. What do you think?


I
like that
idea
.
Hunter always worked alone, but it’s certainly possible there’s
someone else running a con
here. Maybe they somehow crossed paths and argued. Hunter wasn’t into violence
though
.


Maybe the other guy was.
Tyler doesn’t want to stir up his grandfather unless necessary, afraid that’ll bring his mother to Juniper.


What does Nick think? I called him earlier looking for you, but he never called back.


He’s
somewhere on the west side of the Cascades working on a timber theft case
, but
h
e ought to be back soon. Maybe he’ll have fresh ideas.


Maybe everything will be settled by the time he gets here.

We raised our glasse
s
in a toast.


Do you like the wine? It came from the Perkins’ wedding. They loved the ‘Moonlight in the Mountains’ theme so much they presented me with a whole case of it.


You’ve changed your door chimes. Isn’t ‘I Love You Truly’ a bit hokey?


You bet. Eighty-five percent of wedding planning involves massive amounts of hokiness.


Eighty-five percent, eh? And Bianca and Tyler handle the other fifteen percent. How would you describe that category?

Alix laughed, shaking her head.

Central Oregon Cuckoo?

I saluted Alix with my wine glass.

This is nice. I should take your advice and relax more often.


I agree.

As if on cue,
the strains of

I Love You Truly

began
,
and
the door to the Wedding Belle opened. We laughed until we saw who had entered.

Alix jumped up as if on springs.
Apparently, she hadn’t been as relaxed as she’d pretended.

Hello, Arnie. How’s the investigation?


Lookin’ good
.

Arnie craned his neck in my direction.

Hello, Jane.
Glad to see you here.

My muscles tensed. Arnie sounded much too pleased with himself. Did he know about my visit to Irene Cook?

Were you looking for me?

Alix
waved him into the room
with an outstretched arm.


Not particularly. Always a pleasure though.

His attempt at a
smile
didn’t quite work
.

This was definitely not good news. How did Alix manage to look so unconcerned?


Have you made an arrest?

I
was sure they both could hear my heart pounding.


Not yet, but we’re close.
I thought
Alix
might have something to tell me.

He turned toward her.

Some little thing you forgot to mention last time we talked?


Nothing comes to mind.

Alix’s voice remained level. She leaned casually
against the arm of the loveseat, but I could see the trembling of her slender arm.


Me and the guys’d like to take a quick look-see around your
place. You don’t mind, do you?


What are you looking for?


Look, we can do this the easy way or the hard way.

He waved a paper in the air.

Here’s a search warrant that Judge Taylor signed not fifteen minutes ago.

I had no doubt that Alix was about to make everything worse. She did.
Advancing toward him, she said,

Actually, the hard way sounds like more fun.

I pushed between them.

What could you possibly hope to find here, Arnie?

He handed me the paper while focusing on Alix.

You know what we’re after.

I scanned the warrant before looking back at Arnie, incredulous.

A thirty-eight caliber revolver? Alix doesn’t own a gun.


Didn’t I tell you?

Alix said.

I have a complete shooting range in my basement. Oh, wait. I don’t have a basement … or a gun. Sorry to disappoint.


That’s not all we’re after.


In that case
… I sent my bloody hatchet out for sharpening last week. Go ahead and look.

Alix waved vaguely around the room.

Don’t forget to check the garage for rat poison, and there’s my portable bomb-making kit under the bathroom sink, of course.

I half-listened to Alix’s remarks as I slogged through the rest of the legalese on the warrant. Where was Nick when I needed him? Surely no one but an attorney could make sense of this stuff.

Unfortunately, one line was clear enough to freeze my blood. I put my hand on Alix’s tense shoulder and spoke quietly.

Financial records.


You won’t think this is so funny by the time we’re done.

Arnie stepped
back
outside and waved.

Deputies Brady Newman and Jim Cozinski appeared at the front door and stood there hesitantly. When our eyes met, Brady spread his arms in a gesture of resignation.


Come on in,

Alix said.

Sorry I can’t offer you wine when you’re on duty. Jane, have some more?

In a daze, I followed Alix back to the loveseat and held up my glass.

She sat beside me to pour.

We can sit on
the revolver stashed under the lov
eseat.


Stop playing games! They have a search warrant.

Apparently s
tartled at my anger, Alix spoke seriously.

Sorry, habit. I don’t know anything about the gun.

I sat, stunned,
at the sudden turn of events
.
Maybe I hadn’t really accepted that it could come to this. Alix was much better at putting up a brave front than I was. She’d had years of practice.

Arnie lumbered back into the room, carrying Alix’s sleek leather bag.

Hope I’m not interrupting.

He looked back and forth between us.

Alix lean
ed
back
and drank more wine.

I must say, Sheriff Kraft, that bag looks stunning against your uniform. You really ought to get one.

Arnie flushed, but he didn’t rise to the bait. He was too delighted
at having the upper hand, for once
.

Little upset, are you, Alix?

I looked at Alix. Her grip had gone slack; wine dripped from her tilted goblet onto her beige linen slacks. Seeing it, she started. Then, like someone emerging from a dream, she set her glass on the table
and
smil
ed peacefully at Arnie.

What amazing powers of observation you have. You really should consider a career in law enforcement.

Arnie rocked back on his heels
.

Brady, Jim, come on out here.

As soon as he had the audience arranged to his satisfaction, he continued.

Alix Boudreau, I’m arresting you on suspicion of t
he murder of Hunter Blackburn.

I clutched at the arm of the loveseat to steady myself. This couldn’t be happening.

Alix frowned.

Gee, Arnie, I don’t know whether you’ve quite got it yet … your technique, I mean. You’ve got the strut, but the official voice needs work.

She rose
and
saunter
ed
past him toward the door.

Don’t worry. You might still get a chance to arrest Hunter’s real killer someday, once Jane locates
him for you.

She looked back at me and shrugged.

You wanted me to quit smoking, didn’t you?
H
ere’s your chance to win that bet.

She stepped through the door, leaving Arnie and his deputies to scramble after her like puppies following their mother.

Chapter 22

The luminous clock radio dial read five-forty-two
a.m
. as I gave up on sleep and kicked free of my tangled sheets the next morning. Rolling onto my back, I tried again to formulate a plan. Alix’s predicament had been floating around in my head all night without resolution. Even in the clear morning light, the situation remained a nightmare. Alix had been arrested for murder. That was the reality, though the idea of her killing a human being, even her detested ex-husband, was beyond ridiculous
.

I flipped onto my stomach and buried my head under the pillow as I attempted to produce a picture of Alix at her most violent. I could see her stabbing someone with a cutting remark, or looking daggers at a rude person, but that was about it. Some hours removed from the shock of the arrest yesterday afternoon, I couldn’t help smiling at the way she’d dared to mouth off to Arnie, causing him to puff up like an outraged turkey. Her tart sense of humor must be rubbing off on me.

By the time he’d led the
late-
night news on Z21
,
he’d calmed down enough to give a reasonably noncommittal statement, though a self-satisfied smile had threatened to break out from time
to
time. He’d apparently watched enough
Law & Order
segments to avoid saying too much at this stage of the investigation. Too bad someone hadn’t reminded him to take off his hat before the interview. He’d glanced at the monitor shortly after it began and suddenly yanked the hat off his head to keep it from shading his face. His subsequent attempts to smooth his thinning hair into place were both unsuccessful and distracting.


Enough!

Critiquing Arnie’s TV presence wasn’t getting me anywhere
.
Unearthing myself from the bedding, I sat up and fumbled for the cell phone I had placed by the bed in the
vain hope that Nick might call.
I carried
it
with me as I padded to the kitchen. Coffee first. I filled the carafe with fresh water and arranged a filter in place before measuring the shiny Ethiopian beans into the stainless steel grinder nearby. The unearthly
racket
was a small price to pay for a good cup of coffee, and I needed every bit of help I could muster
to figure out what to do next.

Two cups of coffee and a shower later, I still felt like crawling back into bed and pulling the covers over my head. I
went back to
the kitchen table
and stared
at my empty coffee cup
.
I should call Minnie, tell her why Phil and Eileen had been in the casino. Nope. Talking to Minnie first thing in the morning was more than I could
manage. The
phone rang at my elbow, startling me.


Aren’t you coming?

The call was from Tyler. The background sounds of conversation
at Thornton’s
made it hard to hear him.

The SOS meeting?

No need to tell him I’d forgotten all about it.

Be right there.

Twenty minutes later, Bianca intercepted me at the door to the crowded bookstore.

You’re just in time. Leave everything to us.

If she’d heard about the arrest,
Bianca’s cheerful demeanor made no sense.

You’ve heard about Alix?


No problem. We’re
hot on the trail.

I grasped her elbow as she turned away.

Who’s ‘we’? And whose trail are you on?

I was afraid to hear the answer, but better to know before things got out of hand.


The suspects, of course.

Bianca nodded at Phil and Eileen Hedstrom, ensconced in the middle of the front row.

Minnie and Velda made a plan.

Oh, Lord. Things were already out of control.
Too bad we’d wasted our time—not to mention gasoline—chasing them all the way to the casino yesterday when they were right here in our clutches today.

Do we have a new code name for this op?

I asked faintly.

Bianca looked puzzled. Apparently, Minnie hadn’t educated her on the finer points of espionage. I waved my hand in a

never mind

gesture and dropped helplessly into a folding chair to watch the disaster
that
was about to unfold. I closed my eyes, longing to rewind the morning
and revisit
the
excellent
idea of crawling back into bed.

Bianca herded everyone into their chairs. Minnie and Velda made the rounds with cookies and juice.

Once everyone was seated, Bianca addressed the group.

I’m sorry that I don’t have the information I intended to get on Oregon senior services. Next meeting for sure. I got sidetracked by a veterinary emergency, but you’ll be glad to know that in spite of having thirty-three porcupine quills removed from his tongue, Wendell is going to be just fine.

She smiled at Wendell, lying beside her and staring fixedly at the plate of cookies. Apparently the quills
no longer concerned him
.

Instead, I thought we could use today’s meeting to compare notes on what brought each of us—

Alice Durand’s harsh voice cut across Bianca’s comments.

Seems your fool dog’s always getting himself in one kind of trouble or another.

Minnie jumped to Wendell’s defense.

He
saved Jane’s life a year ago!


Maybe so, but what about the time he swallowed that rock?


Poor Wendell has only one eye. Maybe he couldn’t tell it was a rock
,

Velda said.


He’s got a nose, doesn’t he? Even with one eye, seems he could recognize a rock.

Alice was not about to back down.

Pets are a lot of bother and money, if
you ask me.


But they give you so much love,

Bianca swept aside Alice’s objections.

Have you ever had a kitten or puppy?


Had a cat once. Not likely I’d get another. By the time I finish what I got to do each day, I
’m not lookin’ for more work.


Wasn’t it nice to have your cat waiting for you at home?

Bianca persisted.


It was just a cat.

Alice fell silent and then abruptly stood up, causing her empty paper plate to slide to the floor.

Now look what I did.

She swept crumbs onto the plate with her crumpled napkin before looking up, red-faced.

We just gonna sit around talking about fool animals?

she asked, apparently forgetting she’d introduced the topic.


I’m sorry, Alice,

Bianca said, flustered.

Minnie?

Minnie stood up and smiled at the group, but it wasn’t her usual friendly smile. In fact, she looked more like a shark than anything else. I listened, fascinated, as she circled her prey.


Wouldn’t it be interesting to find out how each of us came to join the group?


No,

said Alice.

We already did that. We all got ripped off by someone, or we’re related to someone who did.

Minnie frowned.

Yes, of course, but how have our experiences continued to affect us? For example, Phil, how did you spend yesterday?

Eileen nudged her husband with an elbow.

Honey, she wants to know what you did yesterday.

Phil merely looked back at Eileen, who finally answered for him.

Why’d you want to know, Minnie?


Just wondering if those crooked roofers have continued to affect your lives.

Phil found his voice at last.

You want to know about those crooks, I can tell you plenty.


We’re just talking about yesterday.

The shark was closing in for the kill. I sank lower into my chair. Where was a shark cage when you needed it?
Just one phone call and I could have averted this. Too late. I closed my eyes.


We haven’t seen hide nor hair of them since they took our down payment three months ago and left town,

Eileen answered.

Leaving no forw
arding address, I might add.


But you haven’t told me what you did yesterday,

Minnie repeated.


What are you driving at?

Eileen’s voice rose in annoyance.


I’m driving at what you did yesterday.

Arms crossed, Minnie stood directly in front of the Hedstroms.

Where were you?


None of your business
,

Phil said flatly.


I’m making it my business. I want—

Eileen lumbered to her feet.

Let’s go, Phil.

They made a nice little procession as they swept out the door, with Minnie in hot pursuit and Velda scurrying behind. Minnie’s voice grew fainter with distance,
but
the silence ins
ide the store seemed to expand.

I cleared my throat.

Anyone els
e like to speak? More cookies?

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