Elsinore Canyon (9 page)

“Well, is that your solution?” Polly said hopefully.

Mr. Hamlet rolled his eyes and crushed Dana’s letter against his knee.

Polly stirred uneasily. “I hope you don’t have any reservations about Phil. My son—”

“No, no, no,” Mr. Hamlet chuffed. “Of course Phil’s fine. I’m just concerned about my daughter.” He went to the door. “Thanks for the tip. I’ve got to get to my office in town for a few hours. Claudia, you want to see me off?” He tipped his face at the back of Polly’s head and winked.

“Thanks,” she winked back. “I have a few more things for Polly.”

His eyebrows went up in surprise. “Just thought I’d ask.”

Polly stood up. “I’ll see you later, Garth.”

“Right. And Polly, if I ever do express any reservations about Phil, don’t be too sensitive about it. It’s different with daughters, you know that.”

“Well, that I do. I have a son and a daughter both, and I know how fathers feel about them both.”

“Then you know there’s nothing that frightens me more than Dana trusting the wrong man.” He coughed politely. The words were out of his mouth before he remembered the latest about Laurie.

Polly gave a stiff nod. “I’m sure Phil feels the same way. Does that help?”

Mr. Hamlet grimaced. “What are fathers going to do? The world is full of targets for sons, and full of traps for daughters. The hell of it is, we send our sons out to hunt, and punish our daughters if they get caught. No hard feelings, Polly.”

He was gone.

Dr. Claudia opened a cigarette case and offered one to Polly. He shook his head, and Dr. Claudia fitted one for herself into a black-lacquered holder. Polly watched in mild fascination. “You’re the only one I’ve ever known besides Garth who uses those things.”

Dr. Claudia answered with a little smile. How such a small movement brought out the facets in her eyes. “He’s the one who got me into it. He always enjoyed things more than anyone I know. Still does for the most part, but—” Her smile drained away. “You marry someone. Everything feels heavenly, and then it isn’t. All because of external factors. Goblins and gremlins, things that come out of nowhere and have nothing to do with your relationship. The sooner Dana gets over whatever it is that’s bothering her the better.”

“It’s Phil, I’m sure—”

“I know, I know, I really hope it is that. My point is, well, Garth’s world revolves around her, and mine revolves around him. You can imagine how things are…”

“Spinning?”

“Yes. I wasn’t that involved in Dana’s life until recently. I had no idea she was even capable of writing things like that. It’s strange, but I feel I need allies, in this campaign to make her happy again.”

“Allies! Well, I’d like to see her happy, too.”

“Polly, do you think she would hurt anyone?”

“You, eh, mean…”

“She’s not a helpless little girl. You know she got a bit of money after my sister passed away, and you know how she’s been spending it. What if she were to retaliate?”

Polly held his breath. “Against whom?”

“Against anyone who tries to help her. You know her mind still isn’t exactly right. She could misunderstand. I don’t know,” she concluded with a helpless flutter of her hands. “I just wanted to put it out there.”

“Hm. Count the days.” He spoke with a conspiratorial glint in his eye.

Dr. Claudia froze. This was one of these weird utterances of Polly’s that would open into a conversational funhouse of mirrors and slanted floors if she didn’t slam it shut now. She gave him a friendly smile. “I’ll leave it up to you.”

Polly collected his materials and bowed out.

As he went down the hall, he couldn’t help dancing his head a bit. Surely, Claudia was coming around to his side. Maybe he could draw the situation out, swell the emotions by delaying the solution, and at some point make a dramatic demonstration of his correctness. Thank goodness Phil was malleable, but Polly once again regretted the boy’s inscrutable simplicity.

As he neared his office, he heard the slap-slap of bare feet coming down some steps. He paused. While Dana had been acting out with notorious brilliance beyond the confines of Elsinore Canyon these past weeks, a certain mysterious presence had been haunting the passages and the vast spaces of the house. In appearance and movement it was pale and flighty, in mood it was manic, morbid, and maudlin. When it appeared, it possessed the body of someone familiar, and even, in its way, dear. Polly had made a few attempts to catch, engage, or banish it, to no effect. But his newest investigations made him consider it in a different light. He was drawn to it with fresh resolve.

What was the point? Act like a meth-head, act like a nun, it was all the same. The cloak bothered the hell out of them, so she wore it constantly. Bastards. The ones who talked and smiled were the ones she trusted the least. Since that night on the roof, she felt free to treat them as she pleased, free to taunt and swear and riot all over town in ways she never could with her mother around—well, in ways she never
would,
because when her mother was around it was a whole different planet. She’d get back to normal when it was over, for her father. And Phil. Damn it, she had to cut through all the weirdness and get back to square one with him. And this “damn” and “hell” all the time. She never used to cuss to herself so much. If Phil could read her thoughts, he would hate them. She must purify her spirit before she sought him out again.

She continued down the stairs in her cloak, incongruously layered over a short, frilly dress. In her arms was a boxed toy—an inflatable Batman.

Polly stepped back against a wall and waited for her to come down. A few steps more, the view of her thigh changing, and he stepped forward. “Good afternoon!”

“Jesus!” She dropped the box.

Polly retrieved it for her as she tugged the sides of her dress. “Not Jesus,” he said with an ingratiating smile. He handed the box to her. “You know who I am.”

Dana envisioned her mother’s luminous eyes, that seemed to reflect the best back to the best and the worst back to the worst. “I know your name. I shudder to think who you are.” She took the box from his hands and slithered around him.

He followed her into a high-ceilinged solarium, still clutching the binder full of her e-mails. “Your friend.”

“I don’t remember picking you.”

“You seem awfully hostile these days. Outside Elsinore Canyon is one thing, but—”

“And you seem pretty much like your usual self.”

“Well, I—”

“How’s Phil?” The question was sincere.

“Phil?”

“Your s— forget it.” She regretted asking.

Polly followed her deeper into the solarium. “He got back from Alaska four days ago. You saw him, didn’t you? Yesterday.”

A wave of venom rose inside Dana—her mother’s thoughts again. But venomous mocking was the prerogative of the truly superior. This was the same mother who would smack Dana down like a bug if she heard her saying the things she was saying now.

“Polly, please drop it. Before I insult you to death.”

“I doubt you could do that.”

“I could try. Seriously, why are you
stepping
on my heels?”

“I don’t mean to. It’s just that we’re both concerned about my son, I think.” He waded further in. “What if he had to keep far away from you? Not speak to you or contact you at all?”

“You mean what if he were in prison?”

“Heh, no. He’s a good boy.”

“Then you mean, what if he were in a Swiss clinic being treated for a mysterious disease?”

“Well, maybe, yes, like that.”

Dana was in serious danger of having her mind fucked by Polly of all people. “Let’s see if you can answer a question,” she said. “How does it feel to be a coarse, unevolved, reptilian, failed experiment?”

“You have changed.”

“I’ve dropped my mask. Now answer my question, please. I want to know what it’s like to be green with envy that you don’t have a vagina. I simply can’t imagine, only one organ for excreting, engendering, and orgasming, and an ugly one at that.”

“Very…you’re speaking of…”

“All men, but you said you were my friend, so I’m hoping you’ll satisfy my curiosity.”

Polly switched the binder full of e-mails to one hand and slipped his phone out of his pocket. “Excuse me, I’ve got to answer this. Eh.” He thumbed in a reminder:
drug test.

“Writing my epitaph?”

“No,” he laughed awkwardly as he slipped his phone back in. “You know, perhaps you should get out for a breath of sea air.”

“Or a breath of sea water. Like my mother.”

“I, ehm, I’m going to take off.”

“There’s nothing I’d rather you took.”

Polly bobbled by way of farewell, and disappeared.

“Except my so-called life,” Dana said, loud enough for him to hear.

No answer.

“Doofus,” she muttered.

Alone in the quiet, high-ceilinged solarium, she stepped to a mirror to see what she looked like angry. White and toothy. Doofus McBubbles Pokey Polonius, not worth one atom of her peace of mind and yet he somehow had the power to totally piss her off. Why did he have to be Phil’s father? She couldn’t wait for sweet, wonderful Phil to turn eighteen so he could be free of that stupid tyrant lardball. There were other things that would take time. Phil also had no mother now, plus he was only sixteen and still under the impression that a parent’s approval was a necessary thing. Dana had been there a year ago herself; Phil would catch up. She looked at herself again. Still white, less toothy. She was trying to imagine loving such a heinous father as Polly, or lord in holy everlasting heaven forfend, having that whale toad dancing hippo Jabba the Hut for a husband, when some stilted figures faded in, reflected, over her shoulder. She turned to see the human originals, and her face sparkled with glee. Two cool, penetrating smiles were aimed at her. “Whoa. Ladies!”

Hostessly Duties

The three girls sauntered forward with curious smiles.

“You two!” said Dana. “Jeez, where have you been? I mean how have you been?”

“Hey, girlfriend.” “We were thinking about you.”

“Nice to see you. I can use some company.”

“We figured.”

“Except I look like a used tampon. Thanks for the advance notice.”

A tight, canny laugh. “We missed you the last time we were here.”

“The wedding reception from hell?”

“That was quite a day.” “Have things gotten any better?”

“Judge me by my acts.”

“So then, things are totally shitty.”

“You don’t have to rub it in. Never mind me, it’s too depressing. What about you guys?”

“Been better,” Gale shrugged. “When you’re having it all, you’re up for a fall.”

“What’s happened? You’re not flat on the ground, are you?”

“Just getting to my feet, actually.”

“So you’re right around God’s crotch.”

Gale cracked a bitter smile. “You’ve always got to blow someone.”

“I have dedicated myself to denying that necessity for some time now,” said Dana. “As you may have heard. So, is there a plan?”

“No, we were just in the neighborhood.”

“Thought you’d drop in and do a little hard time?”

Two still, fixed faces.

“Like in a prison,” Dana explained.

“You’ll be out of here soon enough.”

“Will I? I’ve stopped thinking about the future.” Dana wandered to a towering window and curled up on the ledge, her cloak trailing down. She looked like an aloof, exotic cat. “The problem is, everyone here is either living a nightmare or having one. Be warned.”

Rosie wandered over to her. “What are
you
dreaming? Maybe it’s Freudian.”

“What if it’s not? That’s what I’m afraid of. I mean, what if there literally are demons that come up from hell and tell you to do unspeakable things, and what if I’m literally falling off a cliff and drowning in those waves out there?”

Rosie and Gale followed Dana’s gaze apprehensively. There was an ocean out there all right, which definitely contained waves, where a person could definitely drown.

Dana chuckled softly. “This is frazzling me.” She slid off her spot on the ledge. “Did you say something about going shopping?”

“Ehhr.” “I think so.”

“I need to do something civilized. Do you s’pose I could hit town in this Darth Vader outfit?”

“Get something else.”

Dana stepped between them and linked arms on both sides. “Okay. But I have a ton of junk to throw away before Stanford so I’m watching what I buy, and I—I can’t do this.” She dropped their arms.

“What?”

“What are you really doing here?”

“Hanging with you.”

“I can see that.”

“Then what…?”

“Why?
Why
are you hanging with me?”

“Why not? We’ve barely seen you since before graduation. Including at your mom’s funeral and your dad’s wedding reception.”

“I thought we covered that. What do you want, an apology for failing my hostessly duties?”

“No.”

“What I mean is, did someone tell you to hang with me?”

Two baffled glares.

“As a lawyer’s daughter, I am sensing a reluctance to answer.”

Rosie shifted her weight. “So how are we supposed to?”

“Answer?”

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