Authors: Lian Hearn
Finally he released her. They sat side by side on silk cushions. He said, “Why are you here? Is my brother dead?”
“No, although, forgive me for saying it, I have wished many times he were. Terrible events occurred at Matsutani. He imprisoned me all winter. There was an earthquake and I ran away.” When he said nothing, Tama went on. “I know you were in contact with some of our old retainers—Enryo and his wife.”
“Kiyoyori had them killed, I believe,” Masachika said.
“Somehow he was forewarned that he would be ambushed in the hunt. He made Enryo ride his horse and take the arrow that was intended for him.” She remembered the desperate woman running. “His wife tried to stop the attack. She was tortured to death.”
“He has become cruel,” Masachika observed.
“Cruel and selfish. There is—was—a woman, too. She was a sorceress, and so was the old man.” Tama could hear her voice rising and stopped abruptly.
“What old man? Calm down, tell me slowly.”
“Master Sesshin.”
“My grandfather’s friend? Is he still alive?”
She told him everything; he asked many questions, and when her account was completed he sat gazing at the lake, deep in thought.
Tama said, hearing the pleading in her voice and despising it, “In my mind and spirit I never stopped being your wife.”
“Seven years is a long time and a lot has happened.” Masachika did not look at her. “I was sent away against my will, but I have found a good life here. I am grateful now to my father for allying me with the Miboshi, with the side who are going to be the victors. My adoptive father is a fine man, very wealthy. He has treated me generously and I am betrothed to his daughter.”
“But I was told she is only a child! She cannot give you what I once gave you, and will give you again, now, here, if you want.”
He tried to joke. “You would cause the poor nuns some distress.”
Tama plunged on. “You will take me to your home? We can live together? If only you knew how I have longed for you. Haven’t you longed for me?”
“When we were separated,” Masachika said quietly, “it was as though a limb had been wrenched from me. It would have been easier to bear if you had died. I would not have had to endure imagining you in my brother’s arms, with all the pain and humiliation that brought me. I hated him more than I would have thought possible, and when I heard you had given him a son I hated you, too.” He gave her a quick glance and then resumed his study of the lake.
“What could I do? I was helpless.”
“I thought you should have killed yourself with your mother’s dagger rather than submit to him.”
“I thought of it,” Tama said, “and I thought about killing him, too. But I had the estate to look after. I had Matsutani.”
He shifted uncomfortably. “You know I have made a claim to the estate in the judicial court here? The Miboshi set a great store by legality. Moreover, everyone knows Matsutani is the gateway to Miyako. It’s no secret that the Miboshi intend to move against the capital. If Kiyoyori will not submit to the verdict of law, the Miboshi will support me in taking up arms against him and winning the estate in battle. They will have a staunch ally in a key position and I will have what was mine.”
“Your claim will be all the stronger if I am your wife,” Tama said. “After all, it is my family who have owned Matsutani for generations.” He was making her uneasy. She wished he had not said he hated her. She was afraid he would no longer want her, now Kiyoyori’s flesh had been imprinted on hers and contained within her.
“I am committed elsewhere,” he said. “I can’t easily escape from that commitment.”
“But, as I said, she is only a child.”
“When we were first betrothed she was seven years old. I have watched her grow up and waited for her. Next year she will turn fifteen.”
Fifteen,
Tama thought,
the age I was when I was betrothed to him.
Jealousy and misery welled up in her heart. No wonder he was reluctant to take her back. He would have both Matsutani and his young bride, and increased standing and respect among the Miboshi.
“Let’s be patient,” Masachika said. “Nothing will be achieved by acting in haste. Let’s see how the court case is resolved. In the meantime you can stay here, I suppose?”
“Can you help me? I should have a waiting-woman, I will need new clothes, and of course I should make a donation to the convent.”
“It would be a little difficult,” Masachika said. “I would have to ask my parents, and I think it is better if they don’t know you are in Minatogura.”
“But how long will I have to wait?”
“The court case will be heard before the end of the month.”
* * *
“He will not take me back,” Tama said later to the Abbess. “I was a fool to expect it. Maybe I was a fool to come here, but what else could I do? I could not stay where I was, a prisoner in my own home, waiting for my husband to get rid of me. And I cannot go back to Matsutani unless…” She fell silent.
“Unless what?” the older woman prompted.
“Unless the Miboshi’s famous justice system confirms me as the rightful owner. Why should I not also submit a claim?”
“It is possible,” the Abbess said after a moment’s reflection. “There are precedents.”
“Matsutani is a prosperous estate. I will be able to endow this convent for years to come. You must have important connections; you can advise me on how to set about it.”
The Abbess smiled slightly. “Presumably you have documents recording your family’s history?”
“Of course,” Tama said, “unless they were destroyed in the earthquake, they are all there. Kiyoyori has copies, but the originals are hidden in a place known only to me. I could send someone to get them … I would need a skillful thief.”
She looked at the Abbess. The other woman said, “I’m afraid I have none in my acquaintance. Let us pray and meditate on how to proceed in these matters. I will give you my decision tomorrow.”
* * *
The following day the Abbess decided that the convent would support Tama’s claim and a request was sent to the tribunal for permission to proceed. Then a long time passed in which she heard nothing. She was used to the constant activity of running a large estate; with nothing to occupy her, her mind buzzed with regrets for the past and plans for the future. Despite her words about Masachika to the Abbess and against her own better judgment, she could not help hoping and dreaming. She believed from the way he had held her that Masachika still loved her as she knew she still loved him. But the pretty features of a fifteen-year-old she had never met haunted her. If only she could regain Matsutani surely Masachika would return to her. If she had the support of the Miboshi maybe Tsumaru would be rescued. She was on the point of deciding she would go back to Matsutani to collect the documents herself when she was told the Abbess wanted to see her. She went at once to the tranquil room near the front entrance of the convent.
The Abbess led her quietly to the side veranda where they could see the gate, and indicated a waiting man.
“Is that someone you know? He says he comes from Matsutani with a message from Lord Kiyoyori.”
Her heart plummeted. It could only be news of Tsumaru. But she did not recognize the man. Kiyoyori would surely have sent one of his senior retainers, Sadaike or Tsuneto. But Kiyoyori did not know where she was—no one knew except Masachika. Could he have sent this man to her, with some message, some promise? But why pretend to be from Matsutani?
“I’ve never seen him,” she whispered, as though he could hear her. “I don’t believe Kiyoyori sent him.”
“Then I will have him turned away,” the Abbess declared.
“No, he can only have been sent by Masachika. I must hear what he has to say.”
“My dear.” The Abbess gave her a pitying look. “What if his purpose is more brutal than a mere message?”
“What do you mean? That Masachika would have me murdered?” Tama did not know whether to laugh or cry.
“Well, you are threatening to come between him and his estate.”
After a few moments in which she regained her composure, Tama said, “If you turn him away we won’t know for sure who sent him or if he might not strike again. Let him in and I’ll give him a welcome he won’t expect.”
“Be careful. We must avoid shedding blood. I will bring him to you myself.”
She waited for him in the same hut where she had met Masachika. She had her knife in her hand and had placed a halberd just inside the entrance. The man must have been lulled by the calm of the courtyards and gardens through which he had been escorted, as much as by the presence of the Abbess, for he stepped from the bright daylight into the darkness without hesitation. She had her knife at his throat before he had even seen her, and when he lunged backward, twisting away from her, he found himself up against the sharp blade of the halberd in the hands of the Abbess.
“Don’t move!” said the Abbess. “We don’t want to have to kill you.”
The man fell to his knees. “Forgive me,” he cried. “I should never have come here.”
“Reveal the weapons you are carrying,” Tama said. “Then I’ll decide what to do with you.”
When he did not answer immediately, she put the knife to his throat again, the sharp blade piercing the skin.
He cried out.
“It’s nothing,” she said, holding the knife steady. “Not even a flesh wound. But don’t misunderstand me. I will let your life blood out in an instant.”
He said, “I left my sword at the gate. I am unarmed.”
“You are lying. I think you came to kill me. Were you going to strangle me with your bare hands?”
“I carry one hidden blade. In the breast of my jacket I have a leather garotte, in the sleeve wax pellets that contain poison.”
“Is that all?” Tama said, swiftly locating each one. “What about these?” She had located a tiny blowpipe and a set of darts in a miniature quiver. There was something almost intimate about searching him. Suddenly she was aware of him as a man.
“Take care,” he said, “they are fatally poisonous.”
She heard real concern in his voice and realized with a flash of amusement that he found her attractive, that the situation pleased him.
“You thought to murder me,” she said. “You say you come from Matsutani with a message from Lord Kiyoyori?”
“It was not he who sent me,” the man admitted.
“I know that. For a start he does not know I am here, and he would never send an assassin to murder his wife in secret; he would come here and kill me himself. He would do me that honor. He and I may have parted, we may hate each other, but I hope we do not despise each other.” Her voice deepened with emotion. “It can only have been the one other person who knows where I am, Masachika.”
“I am sorry,” he said. “It was indeed Lord Masachika. I am employed by his family.”
“Really?” Tama’s tone was scathing. “Do they often send you on such missions? Killing defenseless women in convents? Is that the honorable way among the warriors of the east? Let me look at you.”
The Abbess raised the blinds on the western side and the evening light filled the room. Then she took up the halberd again.
Tama said, “I am going to lower the knife now.”
He instinctively put up his hand to wipe away the blood.
“Don’t move!” she said. She moved around to face him and studied him for a moment. “You seem to be a man of many talents,” she observed.
He fell to his knees and bowed to the ground. “Lady, my name is Hisoku. All my talents are yours to command. I beg you to allow me to serve you.”
“Any man will make such vows at the wrong end of a halberd,” she replied. “You were sent to kill me. Why should I believe your sudden change of heart?”
“I can hardly believe it myself,” he said, raising his head. “I cannot explain it. I feel you have saved me from a terrible sin. If I had killed you I would never be able to atone for it. But now in your service perhaps I will find forgiveness.”
Tama turned to the older woman. “My lady Abbess, do you think he is sincere?”
The Abbess gave the halberd to Tama to hold and knelt before Hisoku. She gazed into Hisoku’s eyes and then her own eyes closed and an intense silence fell on the room. From the garden a bush warbler called, the first Tama had heard that spring.
“He is sincere,” the Abbess said with a note of wonder in her voice. “It is almost like a miracle.”
“Of course I am sincere,” Hisoku cried. “Do you not think I am capable of overcoming you both if I wanted to? But I am held back by my reluctance to commit murder in this holy place, as well as by my admiration for you.”
“It is a miracle,” Tama said. “I need someone I can send to Matsutani to collect some essential documents. If you can do this for me, and if I regain my estate as a result, I will let you serve me.”
“Then tell me what you need,” Hisoku said, “and I will leave tomorrow as soon as it is light.”
Kiyoyori had been confined to Matsutani all winter by heavy snowfalls, cut off from any news of the Emperor’s health or the fate of his son, Tsumaru. He heard neither from the steward Taro nor from Ryusonji. He tried to curb his impatience and anxiety by making meticulous preparations for the spring, which he was sure would bring some revolt or uprising, if not outright war. He did not speak to Tama, though he knew he could not put off a decision about her future for much longer. He could not forgive her for her actions at the beginning of the winter. As soon as the snows melted he sent men deep into the Darkwood, searching for any trace of Sesshin and Shikanoko, and, he hoped secretly, of Lady Tora.
One day Tsuneto returned with the news that the fugitives had been captured at Kumayama and handed over to the monk Gessho.
“They have been in Ryusonji all winter, then,” Kiyoyori said. “Why have I heard nothing?”
“If they are not dead, they will be prisoners,” Tsuneto replied.
“Did you speak to Sademasa at Kumayama?”
“I did.”
“You know Shikanoko claimed to be his nephew, the son of Shigetomo, the former lord of Kumayama? Did he have anything to say about that?”
“Sademasa referred to him as an imposter,” Tsuneto said. “I gather he was more than happy to have him removed so conveniently. He is not expecting him to return to make any further claims.”