Endings & Beginnings (New Mafia Trilogy #3) (4 page)

   “Shit,” I said, running a hand through my hair
and sitting down on a lounge chair across from the one Natalie was using. “I
forgot about Jason.”

   “Jason?” Natalie took a seat on her chair. “What
does he have to do with anything?”

   “I’m not gonna lie, I don’t like that you’re
dating someone else, but I respect your choice and what I did just now was a
dick move, but in my defense, you’re irresistible.” I smiled and winked at her,
knowing that combined with my dimples on display made her knees weak.

Her gorgeous hazel eyes widened and focused on my
mouth before she raised them to meet my gaze. “Uh, um,” she cleared her throat
and I chuckled, relieved she still had that reaction. “Jason and I aren’t
together anymore.”

I honestly don’t know how I managed to remain seated
when all I wanted to do was throw her over my shoulder and take her back to my
condo. “Did he hurt you?” I asked instead.

   “No, it wasn’t like that. I broke up with him.
Things weren’t working out.”

   “Why?”

She flushed again and broke eye contact, picking up
the corner of the hotel towel she was sitting on and twisting it with her hand.
Judging by the firm set of her jaw and the narrow line her lips had formed, she
wasn’t planning on telling me, so I let it go, satisfied knowing Jason was out.
Deciding it wise to steer the conversation away from relationships, I asked her
what she had been up to since she returned home.

She raised her eyebrows at the mention of “home”,
but didn’t correct me. I took this as a positive sign. Natalie filled me in on
the dress fitting and hanging out with the other bridesmaids. When she told me
about her mom’s confession and the doubts she had about letting her in, I told
her Grant had felt the same way, but he gave her a chance.

   “I just don’t think I can forgive that easily,”
she admitted. “There’s years of hurt to make up for.”

   “Trust is a hard thing to get back. You have to
do what’s right for you.”

Natalie sighed and fidgeted with the towel. I wanted
to reach over and still her hand, but held back when she continued talking. “It
would be so easy to keep that wall up and not let her in, but wouldn’t that
make me a bitch? Also, if I do that, what am I throwing away?”

At this point I realized the conversation may as
well have been about our relationship. Natalie wanted to choose the route less
painful and I understood where she was coming from, but pain was a part of
life.

   “I guess just take it day by day. It’s old, but
good advice.”

   “Yeah, you’re probably right,” she said and
smiled at me. Man, I missed her smile. “Thanks for listening. I didn’t mean to
dump on you like this.”

   “Anytime, Nat, I’m here for you.”

   “You were always easy to talk to. Well, not at first
since I could barely breathe around you, let alone talk.” Her cheeks flared a
deeper red and she covered her mouth.

   “Natalie Ann Ross, what are you talking about?” I
teased, remembering just how adorable and awkward she was around me when we
first met at Crimson. It took her quite a few shots of tequila and hits off of a
joint for her to relax.

   “You know exactly what I’m talking about!” she
said with a laugh and chucked her bottle of sunscreen at me. I caught it and
tossed the bottle back to her. “I was dazzled by your green eyes and dimples,
you asshole. Women are helpless against them. That combo is like an alien
tractor beam that sucks you in upon contact and you can’t function properly.”

   “Damn, I’m an asshole and an alien tractor beam?
That fuckin’ hurts.” I attempted to keep a straight face, but failed miserably
when Nat started giggling and I laughed along with her. It felt good to just
let go. Our laughs tapered off when my phone rang. Leaning back, I fished my
cell out of the front pocket of my shorts. It was Grant calling so I decided to
answer.

   “Hey Grant,” I said.

   “Just checking in to see how things are going?”

   “Fine. We’re just catching up.”

   “So no freak outs or anything?”

   “No, we’re good, I’ll call you later.” I hung up
and slipped the phone back in my pocket.

Natalie was watching me with one of her eyebrows
raised and her arms crossed over her chest. “Did you have my brother call as a
back-up in case you needed an out?”

   “No, that was random, but I’m surprised he didn’t
call you first.”

She shrugged and lowered her arms, “I left my cell
phone upstairs since I needed some down time.”

Grant’s call had interrupted whatever moment we were
having and the energy between us had shifted. Natalie was back to being more
guarded. Seeing her, though, had gone much better than I anticipated.

   “I need to get going,” I said and stood up.
Quickly closing the gap between us, I bent down and kissed Natalie on her
forehead. Not wanting to scare her off by coming on too strong, I left it open
for her to contact me. The words “I love you” were right there, dangling on the
edge of my tongue and I barely managed to choke them back.

   “Thanks for stopping by. It was great seeing you.
I’ve missed you.”

   “I’ve missed you too, babe. Don’t wait too long
to call me, okay?” I said with an exaggerated smile and a wink, which made her
laugh. I could still hear her laughing as I walked away and that sound inspired
hope.

Natalie

My heart was still racing and Dom had been gone for
over ten minutes. From the moment we hugged I knew I was done for. I loved that
man and when he held me, I realized how easy it would be to just give in and be
with him again despite our crazy history. Shaking my head, like that would
really clear those thoughts, I decided to pack it up and head back inside. The
sun had moved behind a bank of thunder heads and the humidity had been slowly
building, making the late spring day seem more like late summer. Sweat trickled
down my spine just from walking past the pool to the double glass doors. The
cool blast of air when I opened one of the doors was refreshing. By the time I
reached my room, my skin was prickling with goose bumps, an indication that I
probably got a little sunburned. When I entered the room, my mom was in what
was quickly becoming her favorite spot. She was sitting against an arm of the
loveseat with her legs stretched out across the cushions, reading a book. She
looked up at me and smiled.

   “You got some sun,” she said, but not critically,
she was just making an observation.

   “I did, probably too much. I’m going to go
shower. Are we still having dinner with Grant?”

   “Yes, he’s picking us up at 7:00. Did Dominic
find you?” she asked, folding the page over in her book and closing it before
setting it on the coffee table, indicating this wasn’t going to be a brief
conversation.

    “He did.” I intentionally kept my response
brief.

   “Is everything okay? He didn’t upset you or
anything?”

   “No, we just talked for a bit. We’re good.”

   “I know I’ve been judgmental in the past about
Dominic, well anyone you dated really, and I’m going to try to not let my
experiences cloud yours. It won’t be easy, so please bear with me. I want you
to be happy, Natalie.”

Damn it, she was saying all of the right things and
had been acting rationally all week making me feel like the irrational one. I
decided to take Dom’s advice of going day by day. I wasn’t committing to
getting my hopes up long-term. A day was nothing to lose if I wound up getting
burned.

   “You seem to be happy with Grant and Miranda
getting married.” I set my sunscreen and iPod on the counter and sat down in a
chair next to the loveseat.

   “I am. Miranda’s good for Grant. She keeps him on
his toes. My therapist and I talked about my resistance to you two being in
relationships and we agree that if I couldn’t be happy then, as twisted as it
sounds, I didn’t want you to be happy either.”

I was quiet, letting this new revelation sink in.
What my mom said made sense.

   “Natalie, I’ve been a miserable person for so
long and it pains me to realize how much it has impacted your life and
Grant’s.” She reached over and grabbed my hand, giving it a light squeeze.
“It’s a lot to forgive me for, I know, but hopefully someday you can.”

Take it a day by day
,
I reminded myself.  “Give me time, Mom.” I returned the squeeze and she smiled
at me.

   “That’s all I’m asking, that you give us time.”

She released my hand and I stood up. Before leaving
the room, I glanced over and my mom had resumed reading. She looked content
sitting there nibbling on a cookie as thunder rumbled outside.

***

Grant picked us up right at 7:00 and I was still
rushing around trying to get ready. After talking with my mom, I had every
intention of taking a shower, but made the mistake of lying down on the bed in my
cool, dark room. The combination of sunbathing and two back to back emotional
talks had taken their toll and I passed out.  Fortunately my mom had come in to
check on me otherwise I would have slept through dinner. I didn’t delay us too
much and emerged from the bedroom at about ten minutes after seven with my hair
pulled up into a twist since I didn’t have time to wash it. At least I was able
to rinse off the sunscreen’s greasy residue.

Grant pulled up in front of Butter and it hadn’t
changed at all. A large cream awning extended out to the street where a young guy
in a valet uniform opened the passenger side door and helped my mom out before
opening my door. He then went around and tore off a ticket for Grant. We walked
up to the large glass entrance and Grant held the door for us. I was expecting
Dominic and Miranda’s cousin, Dante, to greet us and was surprised to see his
father, Al Grabano, instead. I had always liked Uncle Al and he was the most
even tempered of the Grabano brothers. When Marco was the boss, Al served as
one of his Capos, but now that the new mafia leadership had taken over, he was
back to overseeing operations of Butter, one of his many business ventures.

   “Natalie!” he practically yelled and pulled me
into a hug. His signature gray streaked beard tickled against my neck. “How are
you?” he asked, stepping away and holding me at arm’s length for a full
inspection, which seemed to be a trait with Dominic’s family. The last time Al
saw me I was recovering from being shot and had my arm in a sling. This was
just a few days before I disappeared and ran away to Los Angeles.

   “I’m good, thanks.”

   “You look great, kid. Better than last time, ya
know what I’m saying?” he raised his eyebrows at me.

   “Yeah, I know.”

I noticed my mom looking at us with narrowed eyes,
trying to decipher what Al was cryptically saying.  

   “Uncle Al, have you met my mom, Anna?” Grant
interrupted and made the introduction. Instead of shaking my mom’s hand, Al
brought it to his lips so he could kiss the back. My mom blushed, actually
blushed, and then giggled. I couldn’t believe it and looked over at Grant who
was shaking his head and grinning. Al was laying on the charm pretty thick, but
it provided the perfect distraction and I had to admit, I enjoyed seeing this
flirtatious side of my mom. I just hoped Al kept it an act. The last thing
Grant and I needed was for mom to fall for a Grabano too. Just sign us up for a
reality show.

Al snapped his fingers and a hostess approached with
three leather bound menus in her hand. We followed her to a table and I
couldn’t help but notice how she kept looking at Grant and giving him all of
the attention. She touched his arm before leaving our table and told Grant that
if he needed anything, to let her know. Grant caught me rolling my eyes.

   “What?” he asked.

   “She’d probably cut your food and feed it to you
if you asked.”

He shrugged, “I can’t help it if the ladies dig me.”

   “Oh gawd. Really?” I shook my head, spreading a cloth
napkin across my lap. Throughout this exchange, which was just typical banter
for me and Grant, mom had laughed.

   “You two,” she said, chuckling.

Just like when Dominic took me to Butter for dates,
the service was impeccable. The moment my wine glass was a few sips shy of empty,
our server was there refilling it, even though the bottle was on our table and
I could have done it myself. Uncle Al personally brought our dessert to us and
I practically inhaled the chocolate mousse laced with Frangelico and topped
with fresh raspberries. Most of the conversation was about the wedding and
plans for the baby. Grant and Miranda tried to keep her pregnancy a secret and
only told a few people, but the news spread anyway.

As Grant was driving us back to the hotel, I
realized this was the most civil and pleasant family dinner we’d had in a long
time. I was automatically on defense around my mom and this manifested in
bodily tension, but I noticed that my body was relaxed. Sometime during dinner
I’d let my guard down. It was a good feeling, but I was still leery that my
mom’s reformed behavior was only temporary.