Endless (14 page)

When I finally stopped talking, Zoe set down
her cup with a definitive thunk and clasped her hands. “All right
then! Let me see what you can do. Move these orbs around.”

Obediently I focused on the glass and worked
on lifting them above the table one at a time. It took considerable
concentration and left me a little worn out.

Zoe watched me without comment, and then
suddenly she sprang to her feet and strode to the door.

“Cathryn!!” she bellowed. “We need you in
here.”

The person in question appeared a moment
later, consternation on her face. “You rang, Zoe?” There was
uncharacteristic humor in her voice.

“Yes. Antagonize Tasmyn.”

Eyebrows lifted, Cathryn turned to me with a
smirk. “I’m not sure this will work, but I’m game. Let’s see. .
.”

I waited for her to speak, but instead, I
sensed a sudden release as she lowered her mind guard. And then
abruptly an image floated into my mind. It was Michael, and he was
sitting quite near her, his face drawn and his eyes bleak.

“. . .and I think. . I think she’s seeing
someone. At home. I heard from friends. . .” Michael’s voice
matched his expression, and my heart plunged.

I saw a familiar hand touch his arm.
“Michael, I’m so sorry. But you know, maybe it’s for the best. .
.”

My heart pounded, and the power surged. The
orbs were whipping about the room, flying at a frightening rate.
Cathryn ducked out.

“All right then.” Zoe reached over and laid a
cool hand on my arm. “Feel the power, Tasmyn. Recognize it. Now
harness it. Take control.”

The glass balls didn’t stop, but I clenched
my teeth and found that I could hold the stream. I tried to rein it
in without letting anything hit the floor.

“That’s it. Now. . .slowly. . .set them back
down. Use the same power. Just lessen it.”

I pulled it back, little by little, until
each orb was back on the table. The last fell with a loud
thunk.

“There we go.” Zoe clapped. “It’s a
beginning. You see, don’t you, how much the emotion fuels the
power? You can do it without, but not as efficiently. Now, we will
work from that point.”

And work we did. I made the trip up to Harper
Creek every Monday and Wednesday, sometimes with Cathryn and
sometimes driving the Mustang, and Zoe was always waiting for me in
the room upstairs. Within a few weeks I could manage the surges of
power much more easily. When Zoe brought Cathryn in to make me
angry, I was able to listen without knocking anything off the walls
or tables.

Aline was pleasantly surprised by Zoe’s work
with me. I told her about how Zoe taught me to handle the rage
through careful breathing and deliberate thought redirection.

“That’s great,” Aline enthused. “I’m glad to
hear you’re making progress there, Tasmyn. How does it make you
feel?”

“Wonderful. It’s so nice to feel like I have
little bit of control over this. We haven’t started to work on fire
or water yet, but Zoe says we will next week.”

Aline smiled. “I know fire is something that
worries you. You’ll be happy to have a better handle on it.” She
winked and added, “And I’m sure Michael will be relieved, too.”

I blushed, regretting that I had shared that
particular episode with my therapist.

“Are you still feeling uncomfortable about
working with Carruthers?”

Shrugging, I tilted my head. “Not so much. I
really like Zoe, and Emma and Fiona are cool, too. I’ve gotten to
know them pretty well. They seem. . .” I thought for a moment,
searching for the right word. “I don’t know, normal. Like anyone
you might meet at any job.”

“Hmm.” Aline nodded. “And that must be
reassuring to you.”

“It is.” My tone must have reflected my
hesitation.

“But. . .?” Aline prompted.

“But I’m still waiting, Fee and Emma don’t
say anything about their assignments. I asked them a little, and
they said they’re not supposed to talk about the specifics of the
work. I just wanted some idea of what they’re doing, and I still
feel like I’m missing some information.”

“I’m glad to hear that. It means you’re being
cautious, as we discussed. Nothing wrong with it.”

“I guess so. At least they’re teaching me how
to handle my power.”

The only real downside I’d discovered about
my work with Carruthers was that it cut into my time with Michael
on Friday afternoons. If I spent the day up at Harper Creek, as I
did more often than not, sometimes I didn’t get back to campus
until after dinner. And then once I was at Perriman again, I was
exhausted from the day’s work and usually fell asleep early.

I was drowsing on Michael’s couch one such
Friday night, struggling to keep my eyes open while we watched a
movie. It was mid-October, and a steady rain beat against the dorm
window.

“Are you following this at all?” Michael’s
voice roused me once again, just as I slid closer to oblivion.

I pushed myself upright, away from the back
of the couch. “Yes! Of course. He’s going to. . .umm. . .try to get
the girl to go on the mission with him?”

Michael snorted. “She stole the thumb drive
with the secret files on them and took off about ten minutes ago.
She was a double agent.”

“Oh.” I rubbed my eyes and smothered a yawn.
“Yeah. I guess I might have closed my eyes for just a minute.”

He reached for the remote and turned off the
television. “Maybe movies aren’t such a good thing on Friday
nights. Come on, I’ll drive you back to your room.”

“But I’ve hardly seen you!” I protested. “I
hate this. Between my work at Carruthers and studying for
mid-terms, and you with your classes, we never have any real time
together.”

Michael rubbed my back. “Don’t worry about
it. Once you’re finished this part of your training, you won’t need
to be up at Harper Creek as much, right? And mid-terms will be over
next week.” He threaded his fingers through my hair. “We’ll make
it. We’ve been through worse.”

For a moment I thought he was talking about
Rafe and Marica. Then he slid his hands around my neck, tracing the
scars that were only just visible on my throat. I closed my eyes
again, this time sinking not into sleep but into Michael’s
memories. I saw again his view of Nell sliding the athame along my
skin, the blood—
my
blood—dropping into the bowl she held. I
shuddered.

“The Harvest Moon Dance is tonight, back in
King,” he murmured. “Two years ago. Can you believe it?”

“How on earth did you know that?” I asked,
amused. All of our friends had graduated in either Michael’s class
or in my own, and we didn’t really know anyone still in high
school.

“Didn’t you get Amber’s email? She sent it to
both of us, to say thank you again for saving her life that
night.”

“I haven’t had time to look at email today,”
I replied. “That was sweet of her. I’ll give her a call this
weekend.” I covered his hands, still at my neck, with my own. “That
was the beginning of our friendship with Amber. The beginning of
the end for Nell, I guess.”

“Maybe.” Michael clasped my hands, drawing
them up and around his own neck. “Or maybe her story still has a
few chapters left.” He smiled, shaking his head. “When I remember
her holding that knife to you, a few weeks after the dance. . .I
wouldn’t have cared if she were put away forever. But then she
saved you. So I guess if she ended up having a decent postscript,
that would be okay with me.” He bent his head to mine, brushing the
lightest kiss over my lips.

I laid my head on his shoulder. “It makes me
think I need to stop putting off going up to see her. Nell, I mean.
There’s no reason I haven’t gone. I think I’m afraid of what I
might see.”

Snuggling me closer to him, fitting our
bodies together, Michael tucked strands of hair behind my ear. “Do
you want me to go with you one of these days?”

“Thanks, but I think this is something I need
to do on my own. Nell and I have history, and I owe her at least
this much.”

St. Bruno’s Rest Home was about two hours
northwest of Perriman, so it wasn’t a trip I could take on a whim.
I had to work out my class schedule, my training at Carruthers and
Michael’s strong objections to me making the visit by myself.

“I have my cell phone, a GPS and a spotless
driving record. Why are on earth are you so worried?” Half amused
and half annoyed, perched cross-legged on his bed, I watched
Michael pace around the room. Ostensibly, he was sorting his
laundry, but I’d tracked him moving the same sweatshirt back and
forth for the last ten minutes.

“It’s two hours away, Tas. I love the
Mustang, but she’s over forty years old.”

“And she’s always been lovingly and
meticulously maintained by your family. She’s probably safer than
any brand-new car out there.”

He balled up the sweatshirt for the third
time and threw it into the canvas bag near the door. “I just don’t
see why you won’t let me go with you.”

I sighed and dropped back onto the mattress.
“Seriously, Michael? I told you. It’s not that I don’t want you to
come. I just need to do this without you there to distract me.”

He sat down next to me, dipping the bed so
that I slid toward him. “I thought you liked me to distract
you.”

I reached up to touch the side of his face.
“Always. But if you go, I’ll be handling your feelings and your
thoughts along with my own. I need a clear head. I can’t
concentrate when you’re right next to me.”

Michael caught my fingers and kissed the
tips. “I could sit out in the car.”

I used his hand as leverage to pull myself
into a sitting position again, swinging one leg over his lap as I
followed the direction of his mind. “Don’t you trust me?”

He grabbed me by the hips and pulled me
closer. “Of course I do. Can’t you feel it? It’s the rest of the
world I worry about.”

I maneuvered so that I was fully on his lap,
our eyes level. Michael sucked in a quick breath as our bodies met.
I draped my arms over his shoulders and slated my mouth over his,
passion meeting heat.

Michael was fighting to hold onto control,
but that reckless streak in me, born last spring, had been rising
again lately. I tightened my arms around his neck, and when he
would have pulled back, I opened my lips, sucking in a quick breath
before I attacked again.

“Tasmyn. . .” He dragged his mouth away just
enough to trail them along my throat. His hands were under my
shirt, pressing against my back, his nails sending delectable
chills up and down my spine. “Are you trying to kill me?”

I giggled, loving the feel of that power. “If
you go, I’m going right along with you.” I leaned back to give him
more access as he nibbled along my collarbone. “I’m testing my
control. Did you notice I didn’t blow us up or even set your room
on fire?”

Michael paused for just a minute, and then he
pressed his face against my neck. “I didn’t notice. I guess I was
preoccupied.” He moved his hands to my shoulder blades, almost
experimentally. “But Tas. . .” I heard the direction of his
thoughts before he spoke the words. “You’re hot. Like, really
hot.
”

I shifted to see his face, trying to figure
what was causing the freaking out I felt in him. “That doesn’t
sound like a compliment.”

“I mean, like fever hot. Can’t you feel it?”
Taking my hand, he held it to my cheek.

I shook my head. “I don’t know what you mean.
It feels okay to me.”

“But you’re on fire. . .”As his voice trailed
off, I saw dawning comprehension and horror in his eyes at the same
time that a possible explanation hit me.

“You’re re-channeling that power, aren’t you?
And keeping it inside. . .Tas, you could self-combust!”

“No, that can’t be it.” Even as I denied it,
I knew he was right. I closed my eyes and focused on slowing my
pounding heart, pulling back the raging desire and cooling my
blood.

Gently, Michael lifted me off his lap and
went into the bathroom. I heard the water running, and following
his thoughts, I reached out my hand for the cool wash cloth without
opening my eyes. Instead, he pressed it to my forehead and then to
my cheeks.

“I swear I hear it sizzling,” he
muttered.

“I didn’t do it on purpose!” I took the cloth
from him and dabbed at the back of my neck. Now that I was calming
down, sweat was breaking out all over my body. “I guess maybe it
was sort of subconscious. I’ve been working so hard on getting a
handle on everything.”

“You need to figure out how to redirect it
differently,” Michael retorted. I opened my eyes and saw that his
face was paper white. “It was like holding a furnace.”

“I’ll talk to Zoe,” I promised.

“Please.” Michael smoothed the hair back from
my damp forehead. “I can’t have you bursting into flames whenever I
kiss you.” To prove the point, he dropped a light kiss on the end
of my nose before he stepped back. “Now why don’t you grab a nice
cold shower before my animal attraction tempts you again?”