His lips were dry, slightly chapped from the recirculated air on Air Force One. He tasted like coffee and cream, and the stubble on his lip scraped over Ethan’s skin. Jack’s hand snaked around Ethan’s neck, tugging him closer.
Ethan made a noise, something between a moan and a whimper, that he’d have been mortified to hear any other time. He was shaking, trembling, and his soul was on fire. Finally, something other than pain touched his heart. Relief flooded through him, overwhelming him entirely, and Ethan gasped into their kiss. Stepping forward, Ethan’s arms wound around Jack, one arm around his waist and the other tangling in his hair, cupping the back of his head. His tongue slipped out, teasing at Jack’s lips, and then, a moment later, touched Jack’s tentative tongue in return. Groaning, Ethan pulled Jack closer as his knees buckled and his heart surged, filling his body with a sudden rush of care, of affection, and of his love for Jack. God, he was already in love with Jack, already falling so deeply in love.
Pulling back, Ethan backed away, holding Jack purposely at arm’s length. Jack gasped, wrenched away from Ethan’s arms and his kiss, and he stared at Ethan with blown-wide eyes and swollen lips.
Slowly, Ethan shook his head. “I went too fast the first time,” Ethan grunted. “I scared you. I’m not doing that again. Not ever.” He breathed out, trying to calm his racing heart. “You said slow.”
“I also said that I want you,” Jack said. His voice was too low, pitched in an octave Ethan had never heard.
It went straight to his cock, via his heart.
“I said that I wanted you, and that I can’t get you out of my mind.” Jack pulled Ethan’s hands off his shoulders, escaping his restraint. He looked into Ethan’s eyes. “Kiss me like you really want to. That’s what I want.”
Ethan crashed into Jack like a man bedeviled, wrapping him up in his arms and caressing his skin. His hands roamed over Jack’s back, over his shoulders, until one hand tangled in his hair again, the other snaking beneath Jack’s shirt at the small of his back. Ethan’s lips nuzzled Jack’s, suckling and nibbling, and then there were tongues dueling, caressing and stroking back and forth. He moved forward, backing Jack up until he hit the front of his desk, his ass bumping into the edge.
Jack scooted onto the edge of the desk without breaking the kiss. His hands dragged Ethan closer, pressing their bodies together from chest to thighs.
Ethan’s hard cock pressed against Jack’s.
Shuddering, Jack gasped. His hands grabbed Ethan’s suit jacket, tangling in the lapels. “Ethan,” Jack breathed. His hips rocked forward.
Ethan jerked, his cock spasming, and then he pulled back, breaking their kiss. His lips clung to Jack’s, his teeth tugging on Jack’s lower lip. Exhaling, Ethan pressed their foreheads together as his hands cupped Jack’s cheeks.
He stepped back again, pulling his thrusting hips away from Jack’s groin.
“You said slow.” Ethan’s thumbs stroked Jack’s cheekbones.
Jack nodded, panting, and licked his lips. “I did,” he breathed. “I did.” Jack’s hands rose, grasping Ethan’s wrists, and his thumbs stroked over Ethan’s bounding pulse point in return. His eyes slitted open. Ethan could barely see any blue around the edges of his pupils.
“Are you okay?” Ethan dropped a kiss to the tip of Jack’s nose. “Too much?” His hands were shaking against Jack’s skin.
“Just enough.” Jack smiled, slow and easy, and the warm happiness falling from his gaze melted Ethan’s spine. He grinned back.
The moment broke when Jack yawned, his face twisting and contorting as his eyes widened and his jaw cracked.
Chuckling, Ethan kissed the top of Jack’s head. “When did you last sleep?”
“I haven’t been sleeping well,” Jack moaned, pressing his face into Ethan’s neck. “Between the summit, the Russians, and dreams about you…”
“I’m sorry.” Ethan wrapped Jack up in his arms, rubbing up and down his back.
“Mmm. Not your fault.” Jack yawned again. He pulled back, his smile still there, but sleepy. “Come with me.”
Ethan stepped back, giving Jack room to hop down from the desk. He blushed for a moment, chastising himself for pushing Jack back against his desk and humping him on the heels of Jack’s request to go slow. He couldn’t think with his cock, not now.
Jack beckoned him to follow, and he led Ethan through the door to his private cabin. A queen bed lay untouched, and Jack’s suitcase sat on a luggage valet next to a leather armchair. In the back of the room, a sliding door led into Jack’s private bathroom. Ethan hovered in the doorway as Jack sat on the edge of the bed.
“We have ten hours till we reach Washington.” Looking up, Jack chewed on his lip. “I know we have a lot to talk about. We’ve got to figure out how this,” he waved his hand between them both, “will work. Are you busy on the flight?”
Ethan shook his head. “No. I was hiding in the bunks down below, honestly.”
Jack grimaced. “No more hiding.” Inhaling, he shifted on the bed, patting the space next to him. “I’m pretty tired, but we can talk for a while?” His voice rose, his words a question.
It was all kinds of dangerous to slide into bed with Jack, but Ethan swore to himself that he’d behave. He shucked his suit jacket, tossing it over the leather armchair, and rolled up his shirtsleeves. Jack scooted back on the bed, sitting up against the headrest, and patted the mattress next to him.
“We’re going to have to be careful about this, right?” Jack reached for Ethan’s hand as Ethan crawled up beside him.
Ethan leaned back, wrapping one arm around Jack’s shoulders and tangled their fingers together with his other hand. “More than careful,” he sighed. “This has to stay secret. No one can know. Not a soul. The fallout if anyone finds out…”
“You’ll lose your job.”
Nodding, Ethan squeezed Jack’s hand. “I’m more worried about you. Your presidency would be ruined. A secret gay love affair?”
“I don’t care about the press or the public.” Jack shook his head. “Who I want to be with is my own choice.”
The words touched Ethan’s heart. Hope was growing in his chest, despite his gnawing fears. Turning, Ethan pressed a kiss to Jack’s temple. “It would still be devastating. I want to spare you that.”
“So we stay in hiding.” Jack tucked his head into Ethan’s neck and leaned against his shoulder. “We go back to what we were doing before. Seeing each other in secret. But now, we’re…together.”
Ethan nodded. His hand stroked the back of Jack’s head. Silken brunet strands slipped through his fingers.
“We’ll have to figure out how you can stay the night.” Jack squeezed his fingers tight as he spoke
It was almost too much. Ethan’s head swam, and the sudden fear that he truly was dreaming crashed through him again. He held his breath, desperate to not wake up this time, until the terror subsided. “We go slow,” he murmured, pressing another kiss to the top of Jack’s head. “We’ll figure it out. There’s no rush.”
“I want you to be happy,” Jack whispered. “I don’t want you to settle for anything less than you deserve.”
Ethan turned, looking down at Jack who was suddenly in his arms, his head pillowed on Ethan’s shoulder. “You already make me happy,” Ethan breathed. He smiled, letting Jack see the fullness of his emotions, the depth of his feelings bursting from his heart. “Happier than I’ve ever been, Jack. You don’t know what you mean to me.” His eyes searched Jack’s. He saw a joy that mirrored his own, shining bright. “I will do anything it takes,” he whispered. “Anything. For you.”
Jack tried to stifle a yawn. Ethan laughed.
“I’m starting to fall asleep.” Jack smiled and raised his hand, cupping Ethan’s cheek. “I want to fall asleep in your arms. I want to be with you every moment I can. Stay? Let’s ignore the world for ten hours.”
“You know I’m with you all the way.” It was perfect. He leaned forward, capturing Jack’s lips again. Jack smiled against his kiss, and Ethan couldn’t help but smile back. “Get some sleep, Mr. President.”
“Jack.”
Ethan’s smile grew. “Jack,” he breathed.
My Jack.
Jack’s eyes slid closed, and then he was asleep, softly snoring in Ethan’s arms. Ethan traced his face with his eyes, mapping the lines, the curve of his cheeks, and the strength of his jaw. God, he was gorgeous. So stunningly beautiful, and he only seemed to get more handsome every day. Was that Ethan, falling deeper into love?
Was this wise? No, probably not. Definitely not. There was too much at stake if they were discovered.
But there was too much to lose if they didn’t try. A lifetime of happiness, joy in each other’s arms.
Love.
Could Jack truly love him? Could Jack, an otherwise straight man, truly fall in love with him, a gay man? And desire him, even? If their kiss was anything to go by, then maybe it could work. Jack had been hard when Ethan had pushed him up against the desk. Hard because of him.
Jack was the single bravest man Ethan knew. To take a chance on love, when that love seemed so far outside of his reality, of the contours of his world. Could Ethan have done the same thing? Probably not. He probably wouldn’t have decided to take a chance on a relationship with a woman, if the situation had been reversed.
Whatever it was that they created, however they figured this out between them, one thing was certain. It was worth it.
* * * * *
Ethan intended to stay awake. He wanted to think this through, figure out a plan for how to cover his tracks. Try to figure out what to say to Daniels. Try to fix his friendship with Collard.
None of that happened. He fell asleep holding on to Jack, his head pillowed next to Jack’s on the bed, and the next thing he knew, hard knocks were pounding on the door to Jack’s cabin.
“Mr. President?” One of the Air Force One stewards called through the door. “Mr. President, we’re landing momentarily.”
“Shit!” Ethan scrambled, helping Jack up as they both blinked sleep from their eyes. “Goddammit!”
“It’s all right.” Jack grabbed Ethan’s arm, steadying him. “It’s all right. I’ll see you back at the White House.”
Nodding, Ethan waited until he heard the steward leave Jack’s office. He pressed a quick kiss to Jack’s cheek and ducked out to the office, where he rolled down his sleeves before slipping out to the main hallway. Stewards passed him by, carrying the last of the flight’s refuse to the forward staging area. Ethan crossed to starboard and headed forward, toward the Secret Service cabin on the main deck. Inside, agents were buckling in for landing.
Ethan slipped inside and sat in the empty seat next to Daniels. He buckled his belt and rubbed his face.
“Where have you been?” Collard grunted, not looking at Ethan.
“Busy.”
“Where’s your jacket?”
Fuck
. Ethan closed his eyes and ignored Collard. He’d left his jacket draped over the chair in Jack’s cabin.
They landed smoothly, and then it was the mass movement of people that was the disembarkation from Air Force One. Jack was first, followed by the agents on duty. Ethan hung back with Collard, Daniels, and the others coming off their rotations in Prague, and waited for the new shift to get the presidential limo ready. They’d ride back in the chaser SUVs.
Ethan clambered down the gangway after the press had taken photos and Jack had answered their short questions and slid into the back of his limo. Ethan held his smile in, even though his heart sang as he watched Jack. The sun was setting as they landed, and the warmth of the summer sunset seeped into his soul. He smiled up at the sky instead of at Jack, laughing under his breath.
Collard nudged Ethan and grunted toward one of the SUVs at the back of the line. “Ride with me.”
“Agent Reichenbach!” Jack’s voice broke through the noise of the crowd, sailing over everyone.
Ethan and Collard both turned.
Jack jogged toward them, holding Ethan’s jacket and wearing a wide smile. “Here you go, Ethan.” When Jack passed the jacket into Ethan’s hand, his hand brushed Ethan’s, and his face lit up, beaming.
Ethan couldn’t hold his grin back. “Thank you, Mr. President.”
Jack jogged back to his limo. Ethan turned around and came face-to-face with Collard’s glower.
They climbed into the last SUV, Collard in the driver’s seat. The door slammed behind Collard hard enough to shake the truck on its wheels.
Collard waited before starting the engine. They watched Jack’s limo pull out, silence straining their friendship.
“Are you being fucking stupid?” Collard finally growled. “I mean, are you being so fucking stupid that I don’t even want to know?”
Friends for years, even before joining the Secret Service, they’d been in the same battalion in the Army, different ranks, but sharing missions and beers and injuries. Collard had been the first Ethan had come out to after the Army, right before starting the academy for the Secret Service. They moved up the ranks of the Secret Service together, countless details and advance trips and campaign stops shared between them. They had no secrets from each other.
“Yeah,” Ethan grunted. “I’m being fucking stupid.” He bit his lip, thinking of Jack sleeping in his arms. “But it’s worth it.”
“Worth your job? Worth his Presidency? Worth everything?” Collard braked hard at the light, slamming down on the turn signal.
“I think so. We think so.”
“Jesus…” Collard shook his head, his face a stone mask barely concealing his fury. He gunned the accelerator, merging onto the highway at the end of the motorcade. “What do you need from me,” he finally asked.
“Scott, you shouldn’t get involved. This is my choice. Our choice.”
“I’m already fucking involved,” Collard snapped. “I already know about it, even though I don’t fucking want to.” He exhaled hard, almost snarling. “And you’re my goddamn friend. And, if there’s someone on this planet that actually managed to capture your heart, well…” Swallowing, Collard trailed off.
Ethan gripped Collard’s shoulder. “Thanks, man.” His voice was clenched. “And…maybe sometime you could cover for me?”
Silence. “I’ll think about it.” Ethan nodded and sat back. It was more than he deserved, even having Collard’s grumpy acceptance. After a moment, Collard spoke again. “Are you happy? Really?”