Enter Helen (38 page)

When Helen died in 2012, about two and a half years after David, she was laid to rest beside him in rural Arkansas, where her mother and sister are also buried. (
Photos courtesy of Norma Lou Honderich and the author.
)

Not long after Helen Gurley Brown died in August 2012, I read her book
Sex and the Single Girl
for the first time. Like millions of women before me, I loved her funny, frank voice from the very first page, but I couldn't help but note the irony of my own introduction to her groundbreaking book, fifty years after its publication.

There I was, a new mom, pushing my baby jogging stroller along a wooded bike path, reading Helen's snappy writing with great pleasure—my hot-pink paperback copy was splayed against the stroller's hood. I wasn't young, single, or dreaming of the big city—so I was hardly her target reader—but her advice has stuck with me nevertheless. If you haven't read
Sex and the Single Girl
in a while (or if you've never read it, period), pick up a copy sometime. Sex is a surprisingly small part of it. At its heart,
Sex and the Single Girl
is really a guide to becoming an individual.

In the five decades since it was written, a lot has changed. I never experienced a world in which a woman couldn't lease an apartment on her own. I've never been discriminated against while applying for a job. I first want to thank my parents, Terry and Michelle Hauser, for raising me to believe that I could do anything I wanted, as long as I worked hard for it. We didn't really talk about “feminism” in my house while I was growing up, but looking back, I now realize that we lived by its principles.

I also want to thank my husband and best friend, Addison MacDonald, for the endless love, support, and patience—and
the occasional wine run. As a working mom (to our son Marlow, whose sweetness and sense of humor are a daily tonic), I am grateful to have such a wonderful partner in life, and such awesome in-laws, Greg MacDonald and Wendy Soliday, whom I now look to as examples for how to raise a caring, kind son.

Flannery O'Connor said a good man is hard to find (Helen would agree), but I've been fortunate. This book wouldn't have happened without my longtime literary agent, Larry Weissman, who one day several years ago took me out for drinks and asked if I'd ever thought about writing a book. Over time, Larry has become a mentor and a friend, a someone so valuable to me that I don't even know what to call him anymore—but “agent” doesn't begin to cover it all. His wife, Sascha Alper, defies classification as well. A skilled chef and baker, she is also a talented writer and editor who read my manuscript early on, and gave me priceless advice and edits.

My smart and seasoned editor, Claire Wachtel, helped me see the big picture. Shortly after I turned in my first draft, we met in a lunch booth at HarperCollins, and talked for hours about how Helen Gurley Brown tapped into the cultural zeitgeist of the 1960s. Hours turned into days when I returned to her office the next morning to share a carton of blueberries and talk some more. After our conversation, I expanded the focus of the book to include more about the era that Helen lived in—and helped define—and those passages were some of the most fun to research and report. I'm also thankful to the indefatigable associate editor Hannah Wood, my savvy and heroic guide through the production process, and researcher Rebekah Call, as well as HarperCollins deputy general counsel, Beth Silfin, for her cool, calm judgments.

Since I first read
Sex and the Single Girl
on the back of a baby stroller, dozens of people have come forward to help me bring this book to life. I am grateful to Katherine Heintzelman, a close friend
and an early reader; Julia Holmes, a copy editor and novelist who helped me fact-check the book; my film agent, Josie Freedman, who thought it would make a good movie; Barbara Hustedt Crook, Eileen Stukane, and Sheila Weller, all of whom made important introductions to sources; Sharon Harkey and Amber Rounds, who transcribed interviews; and of course the dozens and dozens of people who participated in those interviews, many of them writers and editors themselves whom I greatly admire.

I must give special thanks to Lou Honderich, one of Helen's last remaining relatives and a talented author in her own right. (Look up her young-adult novel,
Ricki
.) Thanks largely to Lou,
Enter Helen
doesn't tell the same old “rags to riches” story that Helen told time and time again; she helped me see all the complexities of her beloved cousin as well as all the nuances of her family's history.

Lou also gave me wonderful photos of Helen and David Brown to use in the book. Thanks, as well, to legendary TV producer Robert Shanks, who shared his photos of Helen Gurley Brown in the 1960s taken by his wife, Ann Zane Shanks, and to the photographer I. C. Rapoport, who also captured Helen on film during her early years at
Cosmopolitan
. Finally, thanks to Eve Rockett, the widow of Canadian photographer Paul Rockett, who took the cover photo of Helen, as well as to GNP Crescendo Records, at gnpcrescendo.com, who provided the high-resolution image.

Last but not least, I would like to acknowledge Smith College, and the special collections staff in particular. What an education I have gotten here—and for free! My heartfelt thanks to Elizabeth Myers, Maida Goodwin, Karen Kukil, Joyce Follet, Amy Hague, Kelly Anderson, Kathleen Banks Nutter, Nanci Young, Kate Sumner, Margaret Jessup, and Nichole Calero. The women's archives that are housed here are world-renowned, and the women who work here are world-class.

The pagination of this electronic edition does not match the edition from which it was made. To locate a specific passage, please use the search feature on your e-book reader.

Dating from 1938 to 2001, the Helen Gurley Brown Papers are housed at the Sophia Smith Collection at Smith College in Northampton, Massachusetts, and will hereafter be referred to as HGB Papers, SSC. The SSC also houses the Gloria Steinem Papers and the
Ms
. Magazine Records, as well as back issues of
Cosmopolitan
,
Ms.
,
Good Housekeeping
, and
Ladies' Home Journal
.

A note on the notes that follow: The author re-created scenes based on the recollections of interview sources as well as material found in articles and other documents, including the writings of Helen Gurley Brown. Whenever Helen's inner thoughts are expressed, they are based on dialogue or descriptions from her own notes, letters, journals, columns, memoirs, etc., as cited.

E
PIGRAPH

  
vii
  
“Funny business, a woman's career”:
All About Eve
, 20th Century Fox, 1950.

  
vii
  
“She is such a feeling person”: Runner Associates, 1957 job evaluation of Miss Helen Marie Gurley, then a copywriter at Foote, Cone & Belding, HGB Papers, SSC.

P
ROLOGUE

    
1
  
“Oh well he's got that je ne sais quoi”: Helen Gurley Brown, poem written circa early 1960s, HGB Papers, SSC.

    
1
  
“a lady who knew . . . the power of sex”: Helen Gurley Brown and Lyn Tornabene,
Helen
, 1970–71, HGB Papers, SSC.

    
1
  
“Enter, Helen”: Ibid.

    
2
  
“Anybody can be me”: Ibid.

    
2
  
They called this song, “Look at Me,” aka “The Mouseberger Blues”: Ibid. Note: In later years, the spelling changed from
mouseberger
with an
e
to
mouse-burger
with a
u
.

    
2
  
“she made supper”: Quotes and impressions from Lyn Tornabene, interview with the author, November 2014.

    
3
  
During those sessions: Summary of subjects discussed gleaned from collected taped interviews recorded by Helen Gurley Brown and Lyn Tornabene, 1970– 72, HGB Papers, SSC.

    
3
  
“It was too soon”; “I'm still trying”: Lyn Tornabene, interview with the author, November 2014.

1: R
EAL
E
STATE

    
5
  
“All my life, ever since I was a little girl”:
How to Marry a Millionaire
, 20th Century Fox, 1953.

    
5
  
Helen loved the idea of David Brown; “gentle as a baby lamb”: Descriptions of Helen Gurley Brown's impressions of David; and his house; career, background, and their courtship are from her unpublished autobiography, 1962– 63, HGB Papers, SSC.

    
5
  
“collector's-item age”: Ibid.

    
6
  
“It's too soon”: Ibid.

    
6
  
Helen was a lousy legal secretary: Descriptions of Helen's early jobs, such as working for Paul Ziffren, are from her unpublished autobiography, 1962–63, as well as from
I'm Wild Again: Snippets from My Life and a Few Brazen Thoughts
(New York: St. Martin's Press, 2000), p. 282.

    
7
  
“Helen, the kind of man you are thinking of”: Helen Gurley Brown,
I'm Wild Again
, p. 283.

    
7
  
He interviewed her on a Monday: Ibid., p. 14.

    
7
  
It was a simple arrangement: Helen described her affair with the wealthy builder and the liquor, cash, and gifts he gave her in Helen Gurley Brown and Lyn Tornabene, audio recording file no. 2551b, tape 7, “Haring (?) Saga” (side B), Lyn Tornabene, HGB Papers, SSC.

    
8
  
“I was like a prostitute”: Ibid.

    
9
  
According to Ruth's thumbnail sketch: Helen Gurley Brown, unpublished autobiography, 1962–63.

  
10
  
He was seriously impressed: Accounts of Helen and David's early courtship are from Helen Gurley Brown's unpublished 1962–63 autobiography and
I'm Wild Again,
pp. 25–26.

  
10
  
he, too, had been abandoned by his father: Details about David Brown's family and childhood are from his memoir,
Let Me Entertain You
(New York: William Morrow & Co., 1990), pp. 60–71.

  
10
  
“We were a secret”; “He was the worst kind of snob”: Ibid.

  
11
  
“He's only 42”; “I feel more like a something with other people”: Helen Gurley Brown, early unpublished notes about David Brown, HGB Papers, SSC.

  
11
  
His house was more run-down: Descriptions of David's Pacific Palisades house and Helen's living situation are from Helen Gurley Brown's unpublished autobiography, 1962–63.

2: G
ROUND
R
ULES

  
13
  
“Don't you know that a man being rich is like a girl being pretty?”:
Gentlemen Prefer Blondes
, 20th Century Fox, 1953.

  
13
  
Sol Spiegel, Sam Siegel: Helen described struggling to learn names in Hollywood in her unpublished autobiography, 1962–63, HGB Papers, SSC.

  
13
  
a little mnemonic device: Ibid.

  
14
  
Helen spent at least half her salary buying black-tie dresses: Ibid.

  
14
  
“Tell me, Ernest”: Ibid.

  
14
  
“You simply don't ask a screenwriter . . . What would you think”: Ibid.

  
15
  
“She's supposed to have a clean house . . . but I just have a
feeling
”: Helen Gurley Brown and Lyn Tornabene, dialogue from audio recording file no. 2549b, “General Personality” tape 5, (side B), 1970–71, HGB Papers, SSC.

  
15
  
“Nobody ever asks me”: Helen Gurley Brown, unpublished autobiography, 1962–63.

  
15
  
“Look, you are not a Radcliffe undergraduate . . . You must simply act”: Ibid.

3: S
EX AND THE
N
OT-
S
O-
S
INGLE
G
IRL

  
16
  
“It's useful being top banana”:
Breakfast at Tiffany's
, Jurow-Shepherd, 1961.

  
16
  
She was not beautiful, or even pretty: Helen Gurley Brown,
Sex and the Single Girl
(Fort Lee, NJ: Barricade Books, 2003), p. 3.

  
16
  
painfully plain: Letty Cottin Pogrebin, interview with the author, January 2014.

  
17
  
“the type who'd ravage females”: Cindy Adams, “He Made Her a Married Woman,”
Pageant
, December 1963.

  
17
  
it was David who had come up with the idea: Ibid.

  
17
  
It was up to Mrs. Neale: Descriptions of David's house and housekeeper are from Helen Gurley Brown's unpublished autobiography, 1962–63, HGB Papers, SSC.

  
17
  
it dawned on Letty: Letty Cottin Pogrebin, interview with the author, January 2014.

  
18
  
A natural showman: Impressions of Bernard Geis's appearance and showmanship, Ibid.

  
18
  
his particular genius was in advertising, promotion, and publicity: Background on Bernard Geis Associates from Dick Schaap, “How to Succeed in Publishing Without Really Publishing,”
New York Times
, August 13, 1967; and from Amy Fine Collins, “Once Was Never Enough,”
Vanity Fair
, January 2000.

  
18
  
“Berney Geis was an original. An innovator”: Letty Cottin Pogrebin's eulogy for Bernard Geis, shared during interview with the author, January 2014.

  
18
  
he was a lovable scamp; “How many times a week do you have sex?”: Descriptions of Geis's flirtatiousness and the famous fireman's pole in the office, Ibid.

  
19
  
she nearly passed out: Information on Letty's responsibilities and promotion at Bernard Geis Associates, Ibid.

  
19
  
“I'd like to publish this”: Ibid.

  
19
  
“What
is
a sexy woman?”: Quotes from Helen Gurley Brown,
Sex and the Single Girl
, p. 65.

  
19
  
She had just gotten her own prescription: Letty Cottin Pogrebin, “What ‘The Pill' Did,” CNN.com, May 7, 2010. Background on Enovid from “The Pill,” American Experience, www.pbs.org.

  
20
  
“Folksingers Are Promiscuous”: Stephanie Gervis (later Harrington) cited this sign in her fantastic spoof of
Sex and the Single Girl
, “Guidelines for Village Girls: In Greenwich Village, Sex Is Where You Find It,”
Village Voice
, July 26, 1962.

  
20
  
“The average man with an urge”: Helen Gurley Brown,
Sex and the Single Girl
, p. 21.

  
20
  
“Don Juan would curl his lip”: Ibid.

  
20
  
“Carry a controversial book”: Ibid., p. 63.

  
20
  
“A lady's love
should
pay”: Ibid., p. 239.

  
20
  
“Should a man think you are a virgin?”: Ibid., p. 231.

  
21
  
Helen's funny, forthright voice spoke to Letty: Descriptions of Letty's reaction to
Sex and the Single Girl
and her own single-girl lifestyle are from Letty Cottin Pogrebin, interview with the author, January 2014.

  
21
  
“the newest glamour girl of our time”: Helen Gurley Brown,
Sex and the Single Girl
, p. 5.

  
21
  
“Berney, you won't believe it”: Letty Cottin Pogrebin, interview with the author, January 2014.

  
22
  
“Listen to voices in movies”: Helen Gurley Brown,
Sex and the Single Girl
, p. 81.

  
22
  
“Not everyone is going to be charmed”: Dialogue and descriptions of media-training Helen Gurley Brown are from Letty Cottin Pogrebin, interview with the author, January 2014.

4: T
HE
S
TORY
E
DITOR

  
25
  
“If you would please your woman”: David Brown, “Sex and the Single Girl as Seen by David Brown,”
Cavalier
, April 1964.

  
25
  
David also discovered some love letters: Helen gave a brief account in a note she wrote prefacing her letters to Bill Peters, written in the late 1940's, HGB Papers, SSC.

  
25
  
“what an intolerable waste of gin”: Helen Gurley Brown to Bill Peters, June 15, 1949, HGB Papers, SSC.

  
25
  
“With a ukulele and a striped blazer”: Helen Gurley Brown to Bill Peters, August 8, 1949, HGB Papers, SSC.

  
25
  
“I swam and ate fried chicken”: Ibid.

  
26
  
She really could write: Helen recalled this story to Art Berman in “Helen's Book Was a Shock to Her Mother,”
Los Angeles Times
, June 24, 1962, HGB Papers, SSC.

  
26
  
David was essentially a talent scout: Information about David Brown Associates and David's early projects is from David Brown,
Let Me Entertain You
(New York: William Morrow & Co., 1990), pp. 19–22.

  
27
  
David reported to Herbert R. Mayes: Background on David Brown's years at
Cosmopolitan
, Ibid., pp. 27–34.

  
27
  
Originally called
The Cosmopolitan
: Background on
Cosmopolitan
's founding and colorful history is from James Landers,
The Improbable First Century of
“Cosmopolitan” Magazine
(Columbia: University of Missouri Press, 2010), passim.

  
27
  
For a while,
Cosmopolitan
enjoyed great success: Ibid. Additional background from David Brown,
Let Me Entertain You
, p. 28.