Authors: Darcy Town
Furcas pulled him into their master bedroom and threw him towards the bathroom.
“Bathe, now.”
He pulled out a pair of shears.
“Then I am giving you a makeover.”
Paimon leapt for the door.
Furcas slammed it shut.
***
Dahlia twirled in her dress and stumbled in her heels.
Belial held her upright.
Dahlia wore a gossamer gown of black and red silk with a slit up to her bellybutton; the dress was backless, strapless, and as far as she could tell, held up by magic.
Dahlia blinked to keep her vision from doubling.
“How is this not the most indecent thing ever?”
Belial drained her wineglass.
“We’ve all seen you naked.”
“This is
worse
than naked!”
Belial grinned and poured herself more wine.
She pushed Dahlia into a chair and pulled out a long red pin out of her top.
“Since you put the other one to good use I am giving you a replacement present.”
She knotted Dahlia’s hair and pinned it up, letting some tendrils fall artfully across her neck.
Belial stepped back.
“Hot.
Now get the fuck out of my glam chair.”
Dahlia got up and Celeste took her place.
Belial touched Celeste’s chocolate skin.
“Okay Berserker, I want your hands on the table, now.”
Celeste did as she was told.
Belial pulled out an array of nail polish and manicure equipment.
Celeste eyed all of it with a vague distaste, but kept her mouth shut.
Dahlia looped her arm with Whitney’s and the two marched into the next room.
Whitney tripped on her white heels.
“Why are you in a sexy goddess dress and I am dressed like a, I don’t even know.
I am wearing a tutu I swear!”
Apple looked up from Tracy’s makeup.
“You’re wearing a death shroud.”
Whitney rose off the floor.
“
Why
?”
Dahlia took a sip from her glass.
“Because you are dead?”
Whitney glared.
“I do not find this funny.”
Apple looked away.
“I’m joking, Whitney.
It’s a period piece and Belial did it wrong, because she’s a
lousy drunk
!”
Belial laughed from the next room.
“Fuck you, Apple tart.”
“Appleadris thank you.”
Belial parroted her response in a snarky voice.
Apple rolled her eyes, got up, and brought Whitney back to the ground.
She unbuttoned the jacket that Whitney wore.
“That has got to go.”
Apple pulled her skirt down and switched out the heels for lace up white leather boots.
Everything Whitney wore sparkled or shimmered in whites.
Combined with the mist she let off she looked like an ethereal cloud of lace and opals.
The overall effect entranced those in the room.
Dahlia and Tracy stared.
Whitney spun around.
“Okay that’s better.”
Tracy blinked and got back to polishing her horns, their green sheen matched her painted green lips and sparkle powder that Apple had applied generously.
She stared at her reflection.
“I do not feel so good.”
Apple smacked her horns.
“Calm down, drink more!”
Tracy took a swig.
“Your mother is going to hate me.
We’re eloping drunk?
How low class is that?
And we already had a baby!”
Apple snorted.
“Are you serious?”
“What?”
“You’re not
eloping
.
You’re having a huge royal wedding with everyone present.”
Tracy flinched.
“What?!”
Apple sat on the makeup counter.
“When mom and dad finally got married I was nearly three centuries old, she was drunk as shit and he was beaten to hell and everyone loved it.”
“Why was he ‘beaten to hell?’”
“Mom did not want to get married willingly.
So she got drunk, but still couldn’t say yes, and he got fed up with waiting.
He kidnapped her and took her to Ceres and Lucifer.
Along the way, she started beating the shit out of him and screeching like a harpy.
Furcas and Paimon egged them on until it was a full out brawl on the Grand Promenade, people placed bets and everything.
Dad finally got her to Lucifer, missing most of his clothes, and Lucifer married them without them even saying they do.
Everyone thought it was the funniest thing ever, so it kind of became a fad, and then it became tradition.”
Dahlia leaned back on the wall as the world spun.
“You guys are weird.”
Apple shrugged.
“When you live forever you have to do weird things to keep yourself occupied.”
Belial carried a semi-conscious, fully dressed Celeste into the room.
“Girls, we are ready for stage two.”
“What’s stage two?”
Apple pointed down.
“Wine cellar.”
“But we’re already drunk.”
“Not enough by far!”
***
Lucifer stared into the mirror and fixed his tie.
Nothing appeared out of place.
He was immaculate.
He stepped away from the mirror and turned to leave.
Berith stood in the doorway.
He looked Lucifer up and down.
“Looks like you’re the one getting married.”
Lucifer smiled slightly.
“Interesting.
Had not even thought about it, have you?”
Berith looked away.
“Almost every day since I met her.”
Andy pushed past them.
“I’d marry Belial in an instant!”
Lucifer looked away from Andy and stalked out.
Andy shrugged.
“Ok-ay.”
Helion caught up with Lucifer on the stairs.
“We still need to talk.”
Lucifer held up his hands.
“Helion, I made a promise to your sister, just as she made a promise to me.
She has kept hers and I will keep mine.
That is final.”
Helion would not move.
“No, it is not final!
What if she changes her mind?”
Lucifer glared at him.
“I will ask her before I do it then, all right?”
“No!”
Lucifer sighed.
“What, Helion?
What do you want me to say?
It is her choice, not yours and it is certainly not mine.”
“But you can’t do it!”
“I do not
want
to, Helion!”
Lucifer’s eyes turned blue.
“But I
will
keep my word.
Move.”
Helion let him pass; he sniffled.
Lucifer stopped and turned.
“If I were you I would try my damnedest to convince her that she has things to live for.”
He continued down the stairs.
Furcas waited at the landing tending to the best man and groom.
He’d slicked back his hair into a braid.
He had an eye patch over his missing eye and he wore a spotless navy blue suit.
His left sleeve was pinned at the elbow.
He stepped back to let Lucifer through.
Lucifer patted Nodin’s head.
“Where is Paimon?”
Furcas grinned.
“Crying like a bitch in the bathroom.”
Lucifer sighed.
“What did you do to him?”
“I made him pretty.”
Lucifer stepped into the master room and gaped.
Paimon sat on the bed.
He was clean-shaven, his hair cut and styled, and he wore clothes that fit him perfectly.
His shoes were polished, his tie straight and matching his outfit, not a stray hair or piece of lint in sight.
He only had two pockets, empty, no flask, and no bombs.
His nails were trimmed and clean.
He sulked, miserable yet handsome.
Lucifer made him stand up and turn.
He laughed.
“I am impressed.
I have not seen you like this since.”
He frowned.
“Greece?
It suits you.”
“Shut the fuck up!”
Paimon touched his hair.
“I perfected that shag,
perfected
!
He burnt my clothes, do you know that?
He went through and
burnt
them while he made me shower and now I smell like a flower!”
Lucifer rolled his eyes.
“You smell like him.”
“Exactly!”
“You like it.”
“On him, not on me!”
Paimon folded his arms.
“What do you want anyways besides the chance to laugh at me?”
Lucifer glanced back at the closed door behind him.
“I need to talk to you about your realm theories.”
***
Celeste hefted a wine barrel over her head.
“I don’t know how to open it.
Do I just break it?”
Belial stabbed it with a talon.
“Likey so.”
Celeste tipped the barrel and wine splashed into a Greco fountain.
Dahlia watched them.
“This feels very Greek.”
Apple handed out long straws.
“More like very Paimon.”
Whitney stuck a straw in the fountain.
“Hey can I really get drunk since I’m dead?”
Belial grinned.
“Do you feel drunk?”
“Yes.”
“Then stop complaining.”
Apple patted Whitney’s shoulders.
“Don’t think about it too much, you are brain dead after all.”
Whitney scowled at her.
“Ha ha, riot act.”
Dahlia slid to the floor and landed in a puddle of wine.
“Oh shit!
Belial, you are going to kill me.”
Belial jumped on the fountain and sipped from her straw.
“Why?”
“I got it dirty.”
Belial helped her up, and the liquid beaded off.
“Can’t get dirty, magic dress.”
She jumped around in the fountain and splashed.
“See, no wine on me either!”
She stood up and was clean.
Belial wore a dress made out of cobwebs, opaque in just the right spots, but mostly transparent.
Her heels were blood red to match her jewelry.
She stepped out of the fountain and bumped into Tracy.
They fell to the floor.
Tracy burst out laughing and scooped herself another glass of wine.
“So is this my bachelorette party?”
Celeste brought over another cask.
“I guess so.”
“Then where are my strippers?
I want man flesh, naked man flesh all up on me!”
Tracy fell to the ground.
“Strippers!”
Apple stumbled across the room.
“The men will be here soon.”
Tracy sat up.
“Seriously?
We seriously get strippers?
Like naked male fairies and shit?”
Whitney grinned.
“Woo!”
Dahlia blushed.
“Strippers,
why
?”
Apple leaned against a row of casks.
“Because they’re fun, but there’s one catch!”
Tracy leaned forward.
“What?
Are we not supposed to tell the dudes?”
Apple took a gulp of wine.
“
We
have to strip them.”
Belial laughed.
“Ha-ha!
Sucks to be you guys!”
Whitney floated to the ceiling, paler than normal.
“We do?
What if we don’t want to?”