Every Glance (Every Life #3) (18 page)

I ALMOST FEEL guilty about how easy my Saturday on call is.

I only had two patients to check on this morning, and I got called into the hospital at two because one of my patients at the nursing home took a bad fall while trying to get out of bed. Luckily, nothing was broken, but she has some ugly bruises showing through her translucent skin. I decide to admit her for the night, just to monitor her a while, and I’ll check back with her in the morning.

Really, I can’t remember the last Saturday that went this smoothly. Although, my bright outlook may be attributed to the fact that I’ve had Devyn on my mind all day.

She called me last night as soon as she got home and thanked me for a nice night. Even though we were only on the phone for less than a minute, I had the cheesiest of grins on my face when I hung up, and it still hasn’t left my face.

As promised, I tried to call her earlier today, but she didn’t answer. I know she had some explaining to do to Kyler and her family, so she was probably talking to them when I called. I’ll let her call me back when she gets a moment to herself.

The only thing that’s been clouding my sunshine today is the fact that I told Kyler we’d meet for dinner tonight, so I know I need to cancel. I’m sure that, while Devyn and Kyler talked last night, Devyn told her that we’re going to be dating. But because she’s not the best hint taker, I’ll feel better if I let her know that I’m not meeting her tonight.

I groan as I scroll through my contacts to find Kyler’s number and punch it with my index finger before I lose my nerve. It rings one…two…five times before the voicemail picks up and her bubbly voice asks me to leave a message.

“Hey, Kyler. Uh, I know we made plans for tonight, but under the circumstances, I think we should cancel. I hate what happened, and I really feel like shit. I’m truly sorry, and I hope you can forgive me. What happened with Devyn wasn’t meant to be thrown in your face like that. Please don’t be mad at her. It’s completely my fault. If you have anything you want to say to me, I’m all ears. I wish you the best, Kyler.”

That isn’t what I really wanted to say, though. I wanted to tell her that she had no right to do some of the things she’s been doing lately. That she had no right to show up at my house unannounced last night. But I took the high road, so maybe she won’t be mad at Devyn. Maybe she’ll be a little more understanding about the situation with Carter and realize that she’s just trying to get out from under his thumb.

Satisfied that I’ve done all I can, I shove my phone and keys into my pocket to head over to tell Sawyer about what I have planned for our weekend in Orange Beach. We only have a week left, so if he wants to make any changes, I’ll have to act fast.

I’m halfway to Fairhope when I hear the short chime of a text come from my pocket. I’m sure it’s nothing that can’t wait until I get to Sawyer and Makenna’s, so I’m just going to ignore it.

Well, damn, I
was
going to ignore it. They just keep coming in, one right after another. At this rate, my phone will be dead before I even get there. Pulling over into a closed restaurant’s parking lot, I skid to a stop in the gravel and dig into my pocket with two fingers to get my phone out. In a matter of about thirty seconds, I’ve gotten six messages.

Kyler:
‘I still think we need to meet. I want to understand what happened.’

Kyler:
‘I can make it at six if you can.’

Kyler:
‘Just let me know.’

Kyler:
‘Devyn doesn’t have to find out.’

And the other two are from Devyn herself.

Devyn:
‘Please don’t call me again.’

Devyn:
‘I can’t believe I fell for it.’

What in the hell is she talking about? Fell for what?

I’m not even going to acknowledge Kyler’s texts. My silence should be enough of an answer for her. But I’m not going to let the last two texts go without some sort of explanation.

I hit the button to dial Devyn’s number, and it rings and rings, just as I suspected it would. When the voicemail picks up, I’m suddenly at a loss for what to say.

“Devyn, please call me. I just…I don’t have any idea what you’re talking about. What did you fall for? I…I need to know what’s going on. Give me a chance to fix it…whatever it is.”

Whatever “it” is, I have a feeling it has something to do with Kyler. If I had a clue where Devyn lives, I’d just drive over there and try to get some answers, but I only know the general area. It could take me a couple of hours to find the house,
if
her car is even visible.

I steer back onto the highway, mentally kicking myself for yet another mess I’ve gotten into, and I’m not even sure exactly how I did it this time. By the time I pull in the drive at Makenna’s, my mood is shot, and I don’t know what I can do to make it any better.

“Hey, you,” Mak calls out from the porch when I get out of the car.

I slam the door, almost dropping the papers I brought for Sawyer. “Hey. Sawyer busy?”

“Ouch. Bad day? He’s out back.”

“Yeah, something like that,” I say, running up the steps. I stop to give her a quick hug before going through the house and out the back door. “Sawyer?”

“Out here!” he yells from the shed.

The door groans as I pull it open, sounding like a dying cow. Sawyer is hunched over a long board, blowing away sawdust. “What are you up to?” I ask.

“Wedding present. Mak wants some shelves in one of the spare bedrooms to use half of it as an office space, so I’m turning the whole room into an office for her. A whole wall of shelves, a work table, and a big desk. She thinks I’m only making the shelves she asked for, so keep your trap shut.” He looks up at me. “Uh, what’s wrong with you? You’ve got a vein about to pop right out of your temple.”

“Oh, you know…women. I just came by to give you the printouts of everything I’ve reserved for next weekend, in case you want to change anything. Luckily, this time of year, you don’t have to book as far in advance, but I’ll still need to make any changes pretty quick.”

He sets his safety glasses onto the board and dusts his clothes off. “No, I’m sure what you have planned will be just fine. You wanna talk about whatever’s going on?”

“Nah,” I say, reaching into my back pocket for my wallet and pulling out a wad of twenty dollar bills. “Here. You win. Kyler won’t be at your wedding.”

He shakes his head and holds a hand up. “I’m not taking your money. The bet’s off.”

Knowing that Sawyer won’t take it no matter how hard I try, I shove it into my front pocket. “Your loss. I should’ve known better than making that stupid bet anyway. Nobody lasts with me too long.”

“You’re right, they don’t. But it’s normally
you
that breaks it off. Something tells me that you didn’t make this decision. Did Kyler get pissed about something or what?”

I sigh. He’s not going to drop it. “I did break it off with Kyler. This isn’t about Kyler. There was someone else.”

“Damn, you move fast. So who’s the someone else.”

Shit. “Devyn. Devyn Rion.”

Sawyer’s face sinks. “Come inside. Let’s get you a beer.”

“I’m on call today.”

“Well, we’ll get
you
a bottle of water, and
I’ll
get a beer.”

I follow him inside, feeling a little better that he knows about her, but the fact that he knows isn’t going to change anything with her.

“Sit,” he orders, pointing to the table. He opens the fridge and gets our drinks before sitting at the table across from me. “Now…tell me about it. What are you doing with Devyn Rion?”

“She’s Simon’s mom.”

Sawyer’s mouth hangs open a few seconds before he answers. “You’re shitting me. Kyler is Devyn’s sister? Did you not ever even ask what her last name is? What in the hell did you do to the devil for him to cook this scheme up?”

“To answer all of your questions…no, yes, would’ve been nice if I had, and I really wish I knew.”

“So?” He takes a long drink, draining nearly half the bottle. “What happened?”

I start from the beginning, from the day I saw Simon in the gift shop, and I end with today. He listens without any comments, but I know they’re in there. I know he’s going to say I’m stupid for ever seeing her.

“And I left her a voicemail after she sent the text, practically begging her to call me and let me know what the hell is going on, but I haven’t heard a word.”

He’s drained the beer by now, so he’s just turning the bottle around and around on the table. “I hate it for ya, D. But don’t you think you’re just hung up on her because you were so many years ago? It’s not like you’ve really had time to get to know her, and I don’t understand why the hell you’d even want to. I mean…it’s Devyn Rion.”

“I know exactly who it is, and I’m not worried about the past. We’re both different people.”

“Oh yeah?” He raises his eyebrows. “If she’s so different, then why haven’t you told her who you are? Why didn’t you tell me about her?” He continues without giving me a chance to answer. “It’s because you’re afraid she’s not so different. You’re afraid she’s going to look down on you. And you didn’t tell me because you knew I’d say exactly what I’m saying right now.”

“As much as I hate to admit it, you’re probably right, but I don’t understand how everything could be more than perfect last night and go to shit today. What could’ve changed?”

“Dalton.” He leans forward onto his elbows, his voice lower, softer. “I remember what those people did to you, and I did everything I could to stop it. Of course I’m going to be defensive when I find out you’ve been talking to one of the main people who gave you so much shit. You’re my brother. Maybe not by blood, but that’s how I think of you. And hearing about this now, I’m pissed at you for opening yourself up to it, but mostly at her for treating you the same way she always did. She found out who you are, Dalton. That has to be it. That’s what she fell for. And it doesn’t matter what kind of person you were then or are now…she doesn’t care.”

I bury my face in my hands, wishing I could go back to the night of the Fall Fest. If I could do it all over again, I would’ve gotten Simon down, put him in that ambulance, and went home. I wouldn’t have gone to the hospital that night.

“I really like her. And Simon. I actually started liking the idea of having a family of my own.”

He pats my shoulder. “You’ll have one. Just not with her. Let it go and move on.”

I nod and stand, causing the chair to screech against the floor. “Yeah. I want to get home and go for a nice long run to blow off some steam before it gets dark. Thanks for listening to me whine.”

“Anytime. Except for next weekend. No girls and no girl talk. I’m going to need the testosterone boost to get me through the next week of flowers and lace and ooey gooey lovey stuff.”

“Ahem.” Makenna appears in the kitchen door, pretending to clear her throat. “You better
love
the ooey gooey lovey stuff or there may not be any other kind of lovey stuff the night of our wedding.”

He stands and stalks over to her, pressing her into the doorframe with his hips. “I love it already.”

“Okay.” I jump up from my seat and squeeze around them in the doorway. “That’s my cue. It wouldn’t make my day any better to see Sawyer’s naked ass. You two kids have fun.”

“Bye,” Makenna mumbles between kisses.

And they’re not even newlyweds yet. I’m not coming over here for at least six months after they’re married.

The entire way home, I work on resigning myself to never seeing Devyn or Simon again. It’s only been about a week, so it’s not like I was fully invested. I’m not in love with her. I’d probably come closer to say that I love Simon. Maybe Sawyer’s right. Maybe I wanted her so bad just to prove to myself that I could have her. The truth is that, while I may be more confident in myself, I’m still the same nerdy kid that I’ve always been. If she didn’t like me for who I was then, I sure as hell don’t need her approval now.

When I get home, I’m not even in any mood to run. I just want to go to sleep, so I check my phone for texts or messages again—nothing—and crawl into bed, hoping that I don’t get any calls from the hospital. My bedside manner would probably be somewhere in the Charles Manson range. Sleep is evasive, though, because I can’t stop thinking about what I can do about all of this.

I need to just go back to life as I know it. Work, home, and my friends. Having a family of my own was just some delusional fantasy. I don’t need all of that. I never wanted it. When I had that mindset, women were much easier to deal with. They were in, we both got what we wanted from the relationship, and they were out. No hurt feelings. No games.

Sex satiates a certain kind of hunger. Just like with food, you get hungry, you eat, and you’re good to go for a while. Feelings, however, are unquenchable. The heart isn’t ever satisfied. It drains you, sucking you emotionless, so that you’re left empty and cold and looking for more feelings to feed its incessant thirst.

You start falling for someone, and you overanalyze everything. You can’t wait until the next moment comes when you can see them again. You obsess about them, filling every thought of every day with things the other person has said or done or the way they touched you or looked at you. You’re not happy unless you’re with them, finding new things to analyze and stress over, making new memories to replay in your head over and over again.