Chapter 4
D
espite my hectic world, I enjoyed this time most of all. Just chilling with Alvin, watching movies. It was a perfect way to finish a Saturday night. We'd just finished watching
Scary Movie 5
and we'd laughed like it was the funniest thing ever, even though it was corny as all get out. But just hanging around Alvin was so relaxing, and it made me say screw all that mess everyone else was talking, this was where my happiness was.
“So you want to watch another one?” Alvin said, as he popped the disc out of the Blu-ray player.
“No, I'm not going to be able to stay much longer. My mom will call out the SWAT team looking for me soon,” I replied. My parents stayed super busyâmy dad running the Morgan chain of hotels, and my mom spending the money my dad made from the Morgan chain of hotels. But they still tried to keep track of my whereabouts and would seriously get to tripping if I didn't come home at a decent hour.
Alvin placed the disc back in its case, and I grabbed the remote and flipped it to MTV.
“So finish telling me, when is the new design going to come out?” I asked.
Alvin was working on yet another patent. This time, it was something that would revolutionize the Internet experience, and he was super excited.
“Soon. My attorney is working out some last-minute legal stuff,” he said. He was just about to say something else when I noticed his eyes zoom in on the TV.
I turned to see what he was looking at. One of the MTV VJs was interviewing J. Love. I groaned and reached for the remote to change the channel.
“No,” Alvin said, putting his hand over mine to stop me. “Let's see what your boy is talking about today.” He took the remote from me and turned the volume up just as the VJ said, “So you're really feeling her?”
My eyebrow rose. Feeling her? J. Love was so disrespectful. Flirting with me yesterday and raving about some other girl today.
“Oh, I'm definitely feeling her,” he told the female VJ. “In fact, I'm in love with her and she's in love with me, too. She's just in denial right now.”
“That is so sweet. You're a man after my own heart,” the VJ said, before turning back to talk to the camera. “Well, you heard it here, ladies and gentlemen. I asked J. Love about the women in his life and he said there's only one woman he wants, so Maya Morgan, girl, you better get this man.”
My mouth fell open and Alvin lost his smile. Who in their right mind went on national TV and proclaimed his love for a woman who wasn't his? I stared at the TV, dumbstruck.
“Yeah, you know my boys might not be feeling what I'm doing,” J. Love continued, all but taking the mic back from the VJ, “but Maya is my soul mate. I feel it right here.” He tapped his chest, and the VJ swooned.
“Oh my God! You're, like, so perfect!” she said.
I reached for the remote, grabbed it out of Alvin's hand, then snapped the TV off.
“He's so perfect, huh?” Alvin said, his nose turned up in disgust.
“Come on, Alvin. Really?”
“Whatever, Maya.” He stomped out of the living room. Why in the world was he mad at me? I hadn't done anything.
“Seriously, you're going to be mad at me because of something J. Love did?” I asked, following him.
He spun around, a serious expression on his face. “Maya, you need to shut him down.”
“You don't think I tried that?” I told Alvin. “Every time he calls and texts, I shut him down.”
Alvin cocked his head in shock. “So he's still calling and texting?”
I wanted to kick myself in the mouth. “I mean, sometimes he calls . . . you know, just to check on me.”
“Oh, and you didn't think that was something I needed to know?”
“Really, Alvin? We're going to seriously fight over my ex?”
“Yeah, when your ex is all over TV talking about he's in love with you.”
At that moment, I wished I could get the nerdy Alvin back because this one that was trying to jump bad was actually not a good look.
“Look, Alvin,” I said. “I don't want J. Love. I want you. I'm here with you. I can't control what he does.”
“Whatever, Maya.” He actually waved me off like he was dismissing me or something.
“I just don't believe this,” I said, standing and grabbing my purse. “When you get out of your funky attitude, call me. I'll be at home.”
I stomped toward the front door. And then I was shocked when he actually let me walk out the door without trying to stop me.
Chapter 5
I
couldn't believe I'd wasted twenty minutes lost in my thoughts. Alvin had called me before I went to bed last night. He'd apologized for getting jealous and we'd made up. But I couldn't get J. Love out of my mind. Several blogs had picked up his MTV interview and now it was all over the Internet. Why was he going so hard to get me back?
Even my cousin Travis had weighed in. Since we were only a few months apart, Travis and I were extremely close. He'd lived with us for a while a few months ago, but he'd moved back home to Brooklyn, New York, because his mom was really sick. We'd been keeping in touch via text and Instagram and he'd just texted me,
Do u getting back w JL? Lol
.
I quickly typed back.
No. Hes so out of order. Call u later
.
I wished I had time to call him then, but it was like I was always too busy and running here and there.
No sooner had that thought crossed my mind than my assistant, Yolanda, poked her head in my office door.
“Excuse me,” Yolanda said. The look on her face told me her news wasn't going to be good. Her lips were puckered up, like she was in the middle of a disgusting kiss, and she wouldn't look me in the face.
“Um, please tell me you're just tired, constipated, or something,” I said, dropping my cell phone back into my purse.
Yolanda didn't say a word as she handed me a letter-sized envelope. “Your tickets to the Icon Awards are in there.”
“And I'm sitting in a prime spot, right?” I said, taking the envelope. No way was I going to make my debut at the Icon Awards sitting in a jacked-up seat.
“Um, I don't know exactly where the seats are, but, um . . .” She shifted nervously.
“But what? Spit it out,” I said, tearing the envelope open.
“I
do
know that they're in the balcony area,” she said, taking a step back as if I were going to lash out at her.
“Balcony!” I screamed as I jumped up from my chair. “Are you freaking kidding me?” I pulled the tickets from the envelope and almost passed out when I saw
balcony
printed on them.
“I don'tâ”
I cut her off. “Oh, I don't think so! Maya Morgan doesn't do balconies! You need to get on the phone right now!” I yelled.
“Th-that's actually what I've been doing for the last thirty minutes,” she stammered.
I could tell that she was nervous as all get out, but she had reason to be because I wouldn't even go to the awards ceremony, before I sat in somebody's balcony.
Yolanda continued. “I talked to the planning producer and they said that the seating was specifically doneâ”
I interrupted her again. “Well, who is
they
?
They
obviously don't know who I am. You need to talk to a supervisor or something.”
“I did, because I knew you weren't going to be happy.”
“You're doggone right I'm not happy!” I screamed, slamming the envelope down on my desk. “I'm Maya Morgan and they want to put
me
in the balcony?”
“The booking producer said they could find you
one
seat up front.”
“
One
seat?” I said, raising an eyebrow. Now I knew what this was all about. If I leave Alvin at home, I can get a decent seat. If I want to bring my man I have to sit in the balcony? Part of me wanted to go off and tell all of them what they could do for me. But I wasn't going to go out like that.
“Fine, if that's how they want to play the game, that's how we'll play it.” I grabbed my earpiece, checked myself in the mirror, then headed back to the studio. We were doing a story today on pop star Rickey Gold's spiral downhill. All that money must've been going to his head because he was straight losing it. Today we had an interview with some stripper whom he'd allegedly assaulted so I needed to be focused.
“Do you want me to keep trying?” Yolanda asked.
“You know what?” I told her right before I left out of my office. “Don't worry about it. If they think they can break Maya Morgan, they need to think again.”
I made my way onto the set and tried to get my head together.
“Stand by, Maya,” the director, Manny, said, giving me my cue as the
Rumor Central
theme music started playing. “And five, four, three, two . . .” He pointed at me and I began talking.
“What's up, everyone? It's your girl, Maya Morgan, and have we got the scoop for you.” I delivered my signature intro with my signature flare, then went on to give the scoop on Rickey Gold. Even though the show was good, my heart wasn't in it and I couldn't wait for this show to wrap up.
I had built up my show by breaking all the hot celeb stories. I'd caught a lot of flak because when I'd started, the producers had given me the whole “you need to bring the dirt or get canceled” speech. So I'd sold out a lot of my celeb friends and it had created major drama. But the more popular the show got, the more power I got, so I had told them that . I'd bring dirt, but not from my own backyard. The ratings were down a little, but I was still at the top of my game.
As soon as I got the all clear, I headed to my office. I didn't even sit down at my desk. I grabbed my keys and headed out to my car. During the commercials, I found myself thinking about the balcony and my blood began to boil all over again. My hands were even shaking as I punched in Alvin's name on my cell phone.
“Hey, babe,” he said, answering on the first ring. “Good show!”
“Thanks.”
“What's wrong?” he asked.
“I'm having a bad day.”
“What happened?”
“I just had some drama with the Icon Awards show,” I moaned.
“Oh, I thought something was
really
wrong.” He laughed.
I rolled my eyes. If there was one thing that I didn't like about Alvin, it was how, even though he was supportive of what I did, he would, from time to time, make these little comments like he thought my world was frivolous. I was about to say something when I saw a text come in. I pulled my phone away from my ear and glanced at the screen. The message was from J. Love.
Heard about ur ticket drama
.
Then another one:
Let me know if u need me to pull some strings. I got u
.
And another one:
I'm on the 2nd row
.
I wanted to scream.
“Hello?” Alvin said, turning my attention back to the phone.
“Sorry, I was just distracted.”
“I was trying to sayâ”
“Hey, um, can I call you back?” I asked, cutting him off. I didn't want to be rude, but I needed to talk to someone who understood what I was going through, and right about now that definitely wasn't my boyfriend.
“Oh.” He paused. “Okay.”
“Thanks. Call you back in a bit.” I hung up and scrolled through my phone until I got to J.'s number. He answered on the first ring, like he had been waiting on my call.
“Hey, beautiful,” he said.
“How do you know I have ticket drama?” I demanded to know.
I could feel him smiling through the phone. “Now, Maya, you know I know people who know people.” He laughed at my silence. “Seriously, I don't have a date. Someone suggested I take you, and then someone else told me they heard you would be sitting in the balcony with Alfred.”
Why was anyone telling him my business? I shook my head. Sometimes I hated this entertainment business. “You know his name is Alvin,” I said.
“Whatever. I'm just saying, if you want to leave ol' dude at home, you know you can roll with me,” J. Love said. “Prime seats, baby.”
I can't believe it, but I actually thought about it for a moment. But then I came to my senses and said, “Nah, I'm good. Don't worry about me.” I wasn't going to give J. Love the benefit of seeing me upset. I had planned to vent to him, but his cocky attitude made me change my mind.
“Okay,” J. Love replied. “Just know I got you if you change your mind.”
“Thanks, but my boyfriend has got me. So I'm straight,” I responded.
He laughed like he knew better. “If you say so.”
“I say so.”
“A'ight, Maya Morgan, I'll talk to you soon.”
“Bye,” I said, hanging up the phone, angrier than I had been before I'd dialed his number.
Chapter 6
T
he halls of WSVV, the station that aired
Rumor Central,
were adorned with pictures of me with celebrities. With all these photos lined up along the wall, a person would've thought that I'd been doing this show for years.
I stopped at the photo of me and J. Love, which we'd taken the first time I'd interviewed him. I made a memo to myself to tell maintenance to take that picture down. But right now, I was on a mission.
I rounded the corner to my boss, Tamara's office. Before she got all crazy on me about ratings, back when I interned with her before we actually started
Miami Divas
, Tamara and I were really cool
.
Even though we weren't as close as we used to be, I felt like I could talk to her about anything, and I needed her professional and girlfriend opinion.
“Hey, Tamara, you got a minute?” I said, lightly tapping on her door. Her new secretary, Kelley, had already gone for the day, but I knew I'd find Tamara back here working away. It's no wonder she didn't have a boyfriend. She practically lived at this station.
“Yeah, come on in.” Tamara waved me in. For it to be seven o'clock in the evening, she still looked fly. She had on a silk V-neck blouse that looked like it was from the new Rachel Roy collection and a pencil skirt that flattered her size-six frame. She was sitting behind her desk, hands poised on her computer's keyboard. “Let me just send this email.” She paused like she was thinking. “This new marketing campaign is driving me crazy. It's like nobody can make a decision about anything.” She pounded the keyboard for a few minutes and then hit the ENTER button before letting out a long sigh. “Done,” she said, then leaned back in her chair. “Now what's up?”
“Well . . .” I took a seat in one of the plush wingback chairs in front of her desk. “I needed to ask your opinion. You're still single, right?”
“Happily single.” She smiled. “I've had my share of boyfriends, but boyfriends come with drama. They want your time and I don't have time.” She narrowed her eyes at me. “And I understand you're all in love with this guy Alvin, but your star is shining brightly. The last thing you need is to be caught up in a serious relationship. Especially . . .” She caught herself and stopped talking.
“Especially what?” I asked.
“Nothing, Maya.” She waved her hand, as if that would make her words go away.
“No, go ahead and say it,” I said. “Are you thinking what everyone else is thinking? Especially with someone like Alvin? Is that what you were going to say?”
Tamara had met Alvin several times since he came up to the station quite a bit. She had always acted like she liked him. But now, I wasn't so sure.
Tamara gave me a sympathetic smile. “Well, if you want me to be honest, yeah. From what I know of the guy, he's as sweet as they come, but truthfully that's not what you need in your life right now. I don't expect you to be like me and be single forever. Maybe you
are
cut out for the whole motherhood and marriage thingâI'm not. But I'm saying, right now, you don't need to be serious with anyone.”
“But I love him,” I protested. I had come to that realization about two months ago. After watching both Sheridan and Kennedi go through their share of boy troubles, I'd realized that a lot of times, we girls chase after what we think is the glittery prize, while the real prize is right under our noses all along. Alvin was my prize.
“Yeah, I get it. You love Alvin. And you loved Bryce, and you loved J. Love,” Tamara reminded me.
“I didn't love J. Love,” I responded defensively.
“Well, if anyone, that's the one you should've been loving.”
“What's that supposed to mean?” I said.
She leaned back in her leather chair. “Maya, I'm just going to shoot straight with you because that's the only way I do it. You are at the top of your game, and in this business, the way you stay at the top of your game is by staying relevant and keeping some eye candy on your arm.”
“And I guess Alvin isn't eye candy?”
That actually made her laugh. “Girl, Alvin isn't even a peppermint.”
I felt myself tearing upâand that wasn't easy because I usually didn't sweat what anyone thought. But Alvin was my heart and I hated that everybody was tearing him down.
“But he's sweet to me and he's good to me,” I protested.
“And when you're forty-five and out of the business, that will be wonderful. That's exactly what you'll need. But for now, you need someone that will help continue to make your stock go up.”
I guess she could tell that I was getting a little agitated because her tone softened and she leaned back over her desk.
“You know, Maya, I'm not going to tell you who to love, but you asked my opinion and I gave it to you. Professionally, Alvin is bad business for a girl like you, a girl who everyone wants to be like. Pretty soon you'll fall by the wayside as one of those non-factors,” she said matter-of-factly.
“I'm going to always be a factor,” I said defiantly.
She let out a heavy sigh. “Look at Beyoncé and Jay Z. Why do you think they're on top of the world?”
“Um, because they're Beyoncé and Jay-Z.”
“True, and separately they're already the bomb, but together they're a mega explosion. That's you and J. Love. Kim and Kanye. Justin and Selena. Same thing.”
“Justin and Selena broke up,” I said.
She rolled her eyes. “My point is, people envy Maya Morgan. They want her life. Her clothes, her style, her fortune, her fame. And her man. As long as they admire you, you stay at the top of the game. Besides, it's hard in this business having a relationship with someone that's outside the business.”
“Oh no, Alvin's not like that at all. He's completely cool.”
For the most part
, I wanted to add, but I didn't say anything.
“Yeah, he is cool now, but there will come a point when you're doing your thing and it's going to become a problem,” she replied.
“Okay,” I said, tired of hearing her put down my guy. She hadn't made me feel better. Only worse. I stood. “I appreciate your input, Tamara.”
Tamara smiled. “No, you don't, but one day you will.” She winked.
“Okay, fine. I'm gonna head on out.” I moved toward the door.
“Maya, at your age, it's nothing wrong with going for the one that can get you where you need to go. There's plenty of time for love later on,” she called out as I headed out the door.
“Okay, thanks again.” I walked out of the office before she continued her lecture. I don't know what I'd expected Tamara to say. I should've expected her to say exactly what she had. For her, this wasn't about
who
was best for me, this was about
what
was best for my career. But why couldn't I have love
and
fame?
Even as I thought about that question, I knew me and I knew as much as I cared for Alvin, if I was truthful with myself, I knew that I wasn't ready to watch my career go down the toilet. And if that meant hiding my boyfriend and hanging out with J. Love, I might seriously have to consider doing that.