Eye of the Wind (30 page)

‘Gabriel, it doesn’t matter. I rely on you. You have helped me with so much on the estate.’

‘Hush,’ he said gently. ‘It does matter. Lieutenant Bracey will not wish me to remain in the area, knowing what I do. In fact, I expect him to make it impossible for me to do so. But you know enough now, and are strong enough, to manage by yourself until your brother’s safe return.’

‘Please, don’t leave –’

‘I must.’ He tried to swallow the tightness in his throat. ‘For both our sakes.’

She bent her head. Though she tried hard not to make a sound, he could feel her body jerk as she sobbed. His heart felt as if it was tearing. He lifted his face and the cold rain mingled with his tears. 

Chapter Twenty One

Melissa was devastated. Though she might indirectly have done something useful for her country by helping Robert escape, it was her actions that had appalled him. Her actions that were the reason Gabriel had decided to leave.

She could not regret helping Robert if having done so would save lives. But she knew she would never marry him, or any man like him – which meant most men, for he was typical of his class and upbringing.

But nor could she tell Gabriel it was him she loved. She could not foist herself on to a man who had never said he loved her. Nor, even if he had, and were willing, could she bring him publicly into her life. He would never be accepted either by her family or by society.

Loving someone meant wanting what was best for them. If he could not stay on at the yard, could no longer be her friend and confidante, then she must keep silent, and let him go.

She wiped her eyes with her fingertips. She knew he was aware of her distress. She knew also that he would not mention it. She wondered if she should move away. But with Robert in the sail locker, where would she go? Besides, he did not appear to be anxious to put distance between them. If, when they reached Cornwall, they must part, then so be it. Until then she wanted to stay close and absorb the feel and smell of him. Memories would be her only comfort in the long, lonely days after he had gone.

She must have dozed, for the next thing she knew Gabriel was murmuring her ear.

‘Wake up. It’s time to go about again. I’d better take a look at Lieutenant Bracey. I’d have expected him to have regained consciousness by now.’

‘Perhaps he did.’ She sat up, flexing her shoulders, and stretching her legs out in front of her. The rain had stopped and the night was paling as dawn approached. ‘He may have fallen asleep.’

As they worked together to bring the boat onto a new heading, Melissa’s eyes filled and, with her back to Gabriel, she dashed the tears away, anxious that he shouldn’t see. She had never used tears as a weapon or to get her own way. Even as a child she had recognised it as manipulative. She could not bear him to think that of her.

Agonised that he must leave her, feeling literally torn apart by her valiant efforts to hide her tears, he told her to take the helm. Putting the coat around her shoulders, he moved forward and crouched by the sail locker.

‘Lieutenant Bracey? Are you all right?’ He shook the blanketed shoulder lightly.

Robert gasped and reared up on one elbow, raising his free hand to his head as he muttered incoherently.

‘Try to rest. You’re on your way home. I’ll fetch you some water.’

Robert’s hand shot out and grabbed Gabriel’s arm. ‘Got to tell him. It’s vital. Got to get back. Where am I?’

‘You’re safe and on your way back to Cornwall.’ Janner Stevens had calmed him with those self-same words after his escape and transfer from the Breton boat, when he had woken suddenly and, for one heart-stopping moment, not known where he was. ‘In a few hours you’ll be able to pass on your information to Sir John.’

‘Who? No! Lord Grenville.’ Robert slumped down, clasping both hands to his head. ‘Lord Grenville, no one else. Must tell Lord Grenville.’

Gabriel sat back on his heels, puzzled. The package Janner Stevens had brought back was for Lord Grenville. Now Lieutenant Bracey would speak only to Lord Grenville. Sir John had given the impression he was acting on Lord Grenville’s behalf when sending him to Brittany. But what if he had been acting independently of the government?

What if Lord Grenville had no idea of what his aide had been doing?

Gabriel stiffened as his mind began to race. Sir John had sworn him to secrecy. No one but Sir John had known where he was going and his mission when he got there. Sir John was the only person who had known his true identity, and his assumed name. The truth hit him a hammer-blow: it was Sir John who had betrayed him.

Lunging forward, Gabriel grabbed the lieutenant’s jacket, shaking him. ‘Bracey! Wake up! Is Sir John Poldyce an agent for the French and a traitor his country? Is that what you have to tell Lord Grenville?’

‘No … Don’t know … What …?’ Robert groaned and lapsed into incoherent mumbling again.

Behind him Melissa cried out. ‘What’s happening, Gabriel? Is something wrong?’

Returning to the stern, he sat beside her and passed one hand over his face, trying to clear his mind. ‘Is your family acquainted with Sir John Poldyce? ‘

‘Not personally. My brother and his elder son were killed in the same battle. I understand his younger son died in a duel –’

‘After,’ Gabriel corrected absently, absorbed in trying to find answers.

‘What?’

‘It was after. He wasn’t killed during the duel. He died some days later.’

‘I didn’t know that. Anyway, what about him?’

‘One moment.’ His thoughts racing, Gabriel laid his hand over hers where it rested on her lap.

He recalled his visit to Sir John. Had the baronet sent him to France expecting that he would swiftly be caught? But not only had he remained undetected, he had done what had been asked of him and obtained the information, sending it back with the free-traders. Too valuable to be ignored, it must have been passed on.

Who would have been given the credit? Had it been known that Lord Roland Stratton was the source of the intelligence, might it not have counted toward his rehabilitation?

Sir John had lost both his sons – the younger at the hands of a man who had not only lived, but had achieved the task he had been set despite immense difficulty and danger. Had he been unable to bear the thought of that man returning to England and once more picking up the threads of his life?

Loath to accept it, Gabriel knew he had his answer. It was Sir John who had betrayed him to the French. Had he also betrayed others? Or had Roland Stratton been the sole focus of his grief and hatred, and object of his revenge? The answer to that lay in the information Lieutenant Bracey would pass to the Foreign Secretary
.

Gabriel turned to Melissa and, in the pearly light of the pre-dawn, saw her desperate anxiety. Seizing her hand, he raised it to his lips and watched her eyes widen.

‘There is something I must tell you, many things.’

Her face reflected apprehension and dread, and the words tumbled out before she could stop them. ‘Don’t leave, Gabriel.’

‘I won’t. That is not unless you wish it.’ He watched as shock dissolved into hope and delight.

‘Of course I don’t wish –’

‘Wait. Hear me out.’ He hesitated.

‘What? What is it?’ She studied his face, her own so open and vulnerable he had to drop his glance. He held her hand in both his own.

‘You have trusted me with your worries and your confidences. Your friendship has been, and always will be, a precious gift greatly treasured. You know me as no one else has ever known me. It is my greatest wish that you will know me better still. Remember that in the days ahead.’

Melissa gazed at him. Between wild, windblown curls and dark beard stubble, beneath the black brows drawn close as he frowned, she met the piercing intensity of his gaze. Tiny shocks ran along her nerves and her heart skipped a beat.

‘I don’t understand.’

‘I am not – what I appear to be. You know me as Gabriel Ennis. My full name – my real name – is Roland Gabriel Stratton. My father is the Marquis of Lansdowne.’

The shock took her breath away. As the boat pitched on the waves, and she rocked with the motion, he put his arm around her and drew her close.

‘
You
are Lord Stratton?’

He nodded.

‘Your elder brother is the Earl of Roscarrock?’

He nodded again.

With one hand on the tiller and the other held fast in his, Melissa could only stare at him as she recalled the evening of the anniversary of Adrian’s death and her parents’ plea to her to give serious consideration to marrying.

In her head she heard again, with terrible clarity, her scathing condemnation of Lord Stratton’s character: an opinion she repeated to her aunts. Despite the cold wind and spray her face burned, and she began to laugh.

Helpless and shaking, she buried her face against his shoulder, loving the feel of its warm, solid strength through his coarse shirt.

‘I’ve said something amusing?’

‘I’m sorry – it’s just that my parents – and then my aunts –’ She blushed, shaking her head. Then looked up at him again, suddenly serious.

‘Naturally, I had heard about – what happened. I’m afraid I –’

‘Drew the same conclusion as everyone else? That I fled rather than face the consequences of my actions? It suited Sir John Poldyce for everyone to think that.’

‘Why? Because his son died, not you?’

‘Possibly. But also because my apparent flight – upon which my father insisted – offered excellent cover for the secret task he had given me.’

‘What secret task?’

‘To visit the shipyards at Lorient and Brest and send back information about the ships under repair, and the new ones being built. This information, he told me, was of vital importance to the British Government.’

‘That’s why you were in France?’

He nodded. ‘It took many months to obtain the information, but once I had sent it to Sir John I had served my purpose. It was then he had his revenge on me for the death of his son, betraying me to the French authorities.’

‘Oh dear God.’ Melissa’s face reflected her horror. ‘So that was why – the torture – your back – why you wanted to be alone.’

He looked away. ‘I had nightmares. I was afraid I might say something, give myself away.’

‘That’s why you left the house so quickly after your accident?’

He nodded.

‘How long have you known Sir John was responsible?’

‘About ten minutes. I owe Lieutenant Bracey a debt of gratitude.’ He felt her stiffen.

‘I hardly think so. He has been remarkably sparing with his thanks.’

‘But had he not asked you for help and had you not trusted me I still wouldn’t know. Now at last I can assume my real identity once more.’ He ran his forefinger lightly down her face. ‘Though living as Gabriel Ennis has been a revelation. I cannot regret a moment of it.’

He pulled a face. ‘I wonder what Tom will say. And Tansey, Billy, and the others. And Daisy Mitchell. That woman has a heart of gold. What of your family. How will they react do you think?’

As she pictured her aunts, Melissa dissolved into laughter. ‘Oh heavens. I wish I could say they would be speechless, but I fear not. They were utterly convinced that my attitudes and behaviour had put me quite beyond the pale. That having been so foolish as to turn down possible suitors I should have welcomed with gratitude given my disadvantages, I would probably die an old maid and could blame no one but myself for that miserable fate. They found my reasons for refusing totally incomprehensible.’

‘They would.’

‘You understand, though, don’t you?’ She looked up at him.

‘That you would not marry where you could not love? I understand very well. My own father thought me a great deal too fastidious.’

‘Even your brother was suggested to me – oh, you will not have heard. He is to be married.’

‘My brother is? To whom?’

‘Grace Vyvyan.’

‘Thank God.’

‘You know her, then?’

‘Probably, though I cannot call her to mind. It is enough that he is to be married. I hope with all my heart the happy couple produce an heir and a spare as soon as may be possible. But in any event I have no wish to return to Trerose. I have other plans: my own marriage for a start.’

Safe in the haven of his encircling arm, Melissa could at last allow her gaze to roam his beloved face. ‘What qualities do you look for in a wife?’

He glanced at her, an upward quirk at one corner of his mouth. ‘She must be tall. I have no desire to suffer the permanent backache that must result from constant bending. She must have a lively mind, and care nothing for public opinion –’

‘Would you not find that – uncomfortable, in your position?’

‘If you refer to my position in society, I can assure you, my dearest girl, that possession of a title permits behaviour which would be deemed totally unacceptable in anyone less fortunate. However, my father is a stickler for honour and duty, and the concept of rank carrying responsibility. I have to tell you that as a young man I made truly heroic efforts to ignore those principles.’

‘Were you successful?’

‘For a while. But such freedom exacts a heavy price. I had friends who thought it worth paying: I did not.’ He paused, snagged for a moment by a thorn of memory. ‘However, if you refer to my position as a husband, I can tell you that to see my wife truly happy I would support her in whatever she wished to do.’

‘What of your happiness?’

‘That would be my happiness. Though naturally I hope she would take a genuine interest in those things that interest me.’

‘Naturally. May I ask what those interests are?’

‘Estate management, particularly of woodland. I spent some time in Switzerland studying forestry. I hope you will permit me to tell you about it sometime. Also shipbuilding, and horses.’

‘You are very specific in your requirements, my Lord.’

‘Indeed, I cannot settle for less.’

Melissa’s heart had begun to thud unevenly. ‘Should you find such a woman, what would you say to her?’

His arm tightened. ‘I should tell her that she is the woman for whom I have waited, the heart of my heart; that I am hers if she will have me; that I will love her always. I should tell her that a lifetime together will not be long enough, and that when we are very old, I hope to die first, for I could not envisage living without her.’

Scalding tears blurred Melissa’s vision, transforming the rising sun into a ball of fragmented golden light. She swallowed hard.

‘And then –’ Gabriel bent his head so his lips were just above her ear, and despite the roar of the wind, the splash of the water against the hull, and the huskiness in his voice, every word was crystal clear. ‘Then I would say Melissa Tregonning, would you do me the very great honour of becoming my wife?’

Looking into his eyes, Melissa pressed one hand to her chest to hold in the great swell of emotion. ‘Oh Gabriel.’ Her breath caught and the sound that emerged was half joyous laugh, half sob.