Falcon Song: A love story (9 page)

“It will be eventually. You’ll see. Do you think you’ll marry him now?”

That was a question Kate had asked herself a thousand times and hadn’t come up with an answer yet. Haltingly she replied, “I suppose. It seems more backwards than ever as far as worrying about Jason having regrets, but now everything hinges on what’s best for the innocent baby who didn’t choose to have any of this happen to him or her or whatever it will be. And right now, I can’t seem to figure out what to wear to work, let alone deep, life altering questions.”

Her mom smiled a minimal smile. “It’s only been a couple of days, Kate. Give it some time and it’ll come.”

Chapter 8

It had been eight days by the time Jason and the band arrived back in town on Sunday afternoon and Kate still didn’t have a clue about what she was going to do. Even though she usually couldn’t wait to see him when he got home, this time she almost dreaded it, knowing she had to rock his world like she would.

When the van pulled into the parking lot of his complex, she was waiting for them, but she was saved from him knowing she was so uptight because he was too. Tensions were high in the Aerie neck of the woods. Jason and Cody and the others got out without even glancing at Kate and as Ryan, their keyboardist began to stalk toward his car, Jason called him back.

He and Jason and Cody had a very quiet, but very tense short discussion that ended with Ryan almost stomping away and then turning to flip Jason and Cody off before continuing on to his car. Kate stood looking from one to the other, wondering what was up with this. Cody looked at her and smiled and shrugged and got back in the van with the last couple of guys and it headed out. Finally, Jason turned to her, still obviously tense and wrapped her in a tight hug. “Hi, Kate. Man, I’m glad to be home. How’ve you been?”

How to answer that? Thunderstruck? Completely overwrought? Scared as hell? She settled for, “Fine.”, hoping he couldn’t tell she was being less than honest as upset as he was. “Rough trip?”

He pulled away and shouldered his bag and began to walk toward his door. “No. The trip was fine. Concerts were great. We’ve just been having some trouble with Ryan. He keeps forgetting that Cody and I own this band. We finally just booted him, but it’s been coming for a while. He’s done a couple of things that were uh, lets just say inappropriate.” With his door unlocked, he pushed it open and then finally turned to her and kissed her and asked, “You okay? You sick again?”

She turned away and went inside as she said, “No, I’m fine. I’m just tired. Have you eaten? Mom invited you to dinner.”

He shook his head. “No, we didn’t eat, but I’m not up to visiting just now. You go on without me.”

Kate felt like she’d been slapped, but he didn’t notice. Just walked toward his bedroom, set his bag inside and then went and began digging through his fridge.

Hurt and unsure of how to take him, she obediently walked across his living room to his door. “I guess I’ll see you later then.”

From inside the refrigerator, he mumbled something and she narrowed her eyes wondering what was up with him as she walked back out of the apartment she’d only walked into two minutes before, her eyes smarting from tears she was trying to force herself not to cry. At least since taking that awful pregnancy test, she knew why she was an emotional lunatic.

Apparently she wasn’t going to be telling Jason about the baby tonight anyway.

She was half way home when her phone rang, and she pulled over to answer it. It was Jason and she wondered what he wanted now as she said, “Hey, Jason.”

“Kate, why did you leave?”

“Jason, you told me to. Remember?”

She could hear him sigh on the other end of the line. “If I did, I didn’t mean to. I thought we were going to do something. Hang out.”

Evenly, she said, “We can do whatever you want, Jason. Just decide.”

There was a long pause and then he said, “Maybe it’s just as well. I’m in a foul mood anyway. Go have dinner with your parents and we’ll get together tomorrow sometime.”

Now Kate felt like she’d been slapped twice and finally said into the phone, “Okay. Whatever. Get some rest. Maybe you’ll feel better tomorrow. Take care.”

“Take care? Not love you? What’s wrong, Kate? Are you mad at me?”

Kate rolled her eyes. “No, Jason. I’m not mad at you. Just a touch afraid of you. I do love you and can’t wait to see you tomorrow. Have you done something I should be mad at you about?”

She finally heard a smile in his voice. “Probably, I’m a terrible person sometimes, but I can’t think of anything right off hand. What time do you work tomorrow?”

“I go in at two.”

“Good. Can I have you at nine or ten in the morning?”

“Sure. See you then. And Jason?”

“Yeah.”

“Straighten up. I hate it when I have to be mad at you.”

“Yes ma’am.”

“Love you.”

“I love you too, Kate.”

Kate had been joking with Jason about being mad at him, but that night while she was flipping through the channels, she happened on to one of those celebrity shows. She was only half paying attention while she folded clothes when she heard Jason’s name. Looking up in surprise, she was amazed to see a story about Jason and some nearly six foot tall super model. He was holding the door for her as she entered a swanky Chicago hotel.

Kate was so shocked, she almost didn’t think to read the credits to find more information on the stories they had been highlighting that night. They listed a website and she got up and went in and booted up her lap top, all the time telling herself to keep an open mind. The story was, in and of itself, minimal, they were in effect trying to surmise if Jason Falcon, “the consummate up and coming bachelor” did have a thing going with the model. But there were more photos of Jason and other women. Lots of them. In lots of different situations. Most of them were the same type as the one of the super model. Him opening a door or standing by someone, but a couple were of Jason seated at a table with a woman or even with his arm around them.

Kate thought back to the other day when she’d seen Jason at that party letting that other woman feed him. Were these all that same sort of deal? Happenstance photo opportunities where he used poor judgment? Or was Jason playing the “consummate bachelor” when he was on the road and away from her? And how was she to know if he was? Was stuff like this the reason he’d been so lackadaisical this afternoon. Her head was spinning again with what she was seeing on the screen in front of her.

After spending several minutes wondering what was going on and feeling as if her heart was being squeezed into pieces, she finally plugged into her printer and hit the print button and then went to get her purse. She was going to see Cody. She knew he was loyal to Jason to the death, but she also knew he’d be as honest with her as he could if she asked him.

She was a bit embarrassed to find Cody shirtless with a girl sitting on his couch when he opened the door, but she pressed on anyway. “Hey, Cody.”

“Kate.” He looked out the door and all around. “Where’s Jase?”

“He uh, he wasn’t in the mood to do anything tonight. He’s at his house. Could I talk to you for a minute? In private?”

He looked at her and glanced to the papers in her hand and then stepped out the door of his apartment onto the step outside and closed his door. “What’s up? What’s going on?”

“That’s what I need you to tell me, Cody. I was watching TV today as I folded my laundry. This show came on and did a blurb about Jason and some super model. I went to the show’s website and found these. Is there something I should know about Jason, Cody? Be honest.”

He hesitated and she could practically see him squirm and it killed her. She watched for a second and figured he wasn’t going to say anything and honestly, he didn’t really need to after all. “Never mind, Cody. I didn’t mean to put you on the spot. Sorry to bother you.” She turned to go and he caught her arm.

“No. Kate. Don’t go. Don’t assume things, Kate. Jason loves you dearly.”

She looked up into his eyes and he met hers without hesitation. “Then what’s going on, Cody?”

“Jason does love you, Kate. And he’s faithful to you, I swear. But he can’t avoid every girl, especially when y’all don’t ever go with us. A couple of times he’s had to take someone to dinner or something when it’s official band business, but that’s all. I swear. He doesn’t fool around. Ever.” She looked up into his eyes one more time and he continued, “I’m being honest, Kate. About the worst you have to worry about is just how Jason was at that party at my house the other day. He isn’t rude to the girls who come onto him, but he’s not a player. No way. You know him. He’s still the designated driver when we party when we’re on the road. He never gets plastered and fools around the way some of us do.”

At that, he tried to smile at her. “He’s a hundred times more respectable than me. Maybe a thousand. I’m sure that’s why he gets so much more press. They see him as the ultimate conquest.”

“That’s very reassuring, Cody.”

“Anything to help. Let me see the pictures.” He thumbed through them quickly and handed her back one of Jason seated with a woman. “That one I was there for. She’s a newscaster at some TV station in San Francisco. We had lunch with them after doing a segment on their noon news. It wasn’t any kind of a date. And I believe this one is cropped from a larger photo of us and another girl band that opened for Kenny Chesney one time. I don’t recognize any of the others. Sorry. But, I’m telling you, Kate. Jason is whipped. He practically worships you. Now more than ever. He’d marry you in a minute if you’d do it. You know that. I know he’s asked you like a dozen times.”

That was true, but it didn’t make her any more anxious to be made a fool of when Jason was away from her. She took the photos back. “Thanks, Cody. I’m sorry I bothered you, but sometimes I just need to know. To be reassured.”

He squeezed her shoulder. “I absolutely understand. But he’s your love slave, I’m telling you. Trust him. He deserves it. He’s not perfect, but there isn’t a better man on the planet.”

“Thanks, Cody.”

“You’re welcome. And to tell you the truth, I wish you’d hurry and marry him so he could quit worrying about it.”

“You are the last person to lecture me about getting married, Cody Rawlings.”

“Man, have you got a point there. Take care, Kate.”

“See ya.”

Kate drove home in a quandary. Cody had tried to reassure her, and in a way he had. He’d said that Jason loved her. But then Kate knew that. What she didn’t know was how Jason was dealing with the other women he came in contact with. Cody had said the worst she needed to worry about was the way Jason had been at that party the other night. He’d meant it to make her feel better, but that party had troubled her deeply.

She was almost more mixed up when she got home than when she’d left and she went back into her part of the house to her computer and Googled Jason Falcon and then the band Aerie. She’d been at it for more than an hour when her mom came in. “What are you up to Katie? We haven’t heard a peep out of you since dinner.” She came up behind Kate and looked at the screen over her shoulder and after a second said, “Oh my.”

Those two syllables were all Kate needed to hear to know the pain in her heart wasn’t unfounded. There were literally hundreds of photos of Jason on the web. Most of them were just great pictures of a truly gorgeous singer. But there were some that were awful. Jason dancing like he had been on stage the other day. Or Jason posing with various people, usually lone females. There were several of him with the girls right on his lap and a lot more of him with his arm- or arms, around them. A few even had him kissing girls who were lined up to greet them along the stage or roped off walkways.

After letting her mother see what she’d been finding, she printed a couple of the most incriminating and then got up from the desk and picked up her keys. “I’m going for a drive, Mom. I might be late, don’t wait up. I may have to drive all the way to Texas again.” She gave her mother a heartbroken smile and let herself out the back door.

                                          ***

Cody sent his female friend home early. Ever since Kate had been here, his mind had been elsewhere anyway. He paced and fretted for close to an hour and then went and got into his Jeep and cruised up to Jason’s.

Jason met him at the door in surprise. “Cody! Hey, I thought you’d be entertaining someone on this first night back in town.”

Cody walked in the door and tossed his keys and headed for Jason’s fridge. “I was. I sent her home. Can I eat some of this pizza?”

“Knock yourself out. What’d she do to get sent home?”

Cody turned full to Jason and said, “Kate came over.”

Jason was confused as Cody walked over to the microwave. “You lost me. What about Kate? Or was your girl’s name Kate? What?”

Cody pushed start on the microwave and turned back to Jason. “My girl’s name was Meridith. No, maybe it was Meridee. Something. Anyway, that’s not the point. Your girl, Kate, came to my house while Meridith was there.”

“Okay… What did she want? Was she ticked at me? I was a little grouchy when I got home this afternoon and she didn’t stay long.”

“She mentioned that. Have you got a TV Guide?”

“No. Why? Why do you need a TV Guide? Let’s get back to Kate. What did she want?”

Cody walked to the door. “I’ll be right back. Watch my pizza.”

“Cody!” Jason walked out on the porch.

Cody knocked on the door of the girls who lived two doors down from Jason and they welcomed him in as they opened the door. He visited for a minute and then after having obtained the TV Guide he’d gone in search of, he came back to Jason’s. Handing it to Jason, he said, “Here, find out what celebrity show would have been playing that had a segment about you on it this afternoon. I’ve got to eat my pizza.”